here you will find all of my works! please do not repost any of my stories, with or without credit, or attempt to use my work as your own. i’d also appreciate it if you didn’t remake/take direct inspiration from my posts. requests are always open, you are more than welcome to send me any ideas that you have, read my rules for detail on what i will and will not write for here!
i planned on coming back like when i said but something changed and i’m going through a hard time, i’m just not in the mental state to write 😔 i’m not sure when i’ll be back but i’m trying i promise i miss you all xxxx
what has happened to this fandom since i left? tom and bill incest imagines - like seriously? not sure that this is the place for me anymore because what😧😧 tumblr was once the normal side of the fandom… like the only place w/o wierd incest supporters
synopsis: when a video of tom getting a little too close to another girl circulates around the internet, your confrontation sparks a heated argument between the two of you. but after tom says something in the heat of the moment, he is determined to make it up to you.
content: angst
a/n: i have risen from the dead🎀 i’m really rusty so if it‘s not up to scratch i’m sorry, ill post about why i’ve not been writing later but for now enjoy whatever this is🗣️
my eyes are glued to the small computer screen in front of me, face twisting in disgust just a little more every time the low quality video replays. it is almost nauseating, yet i can’t turn away, fixated until my features are scrunched up in an agitating mix of anger and confusion. i am hoping that the events will change the next time the video restarts, that maybe my eyes are deceiving me, but as the same scene plays out in front of me, i quickly realise that it is real, and that my worst nightmare is coming true. not much can be distinguished - whoever had taken the video clearly hadn't payed much attention to keeping their camera still, or investing in the most high-tech gear, but i can tell that it is him. his dirty blonde dreads fall just below his shoulders, hand clutching a drink, surrounded by a crowd of girls whilst flashing lights illuminate his figure every few seconds, lighting up the bustling club before returning it to darkness. he knows that he is the centre of attention, but that doesn't seem to matter to him, his focus on the small blonde to his right.
much to my frustration, the video is only a few seconds long, showing tom leaning into the girl's ear, whispering something before pulling back, a smirk etched upon both their faces. it quickly cuts off just as his hand brushes along her arm, leaving much to be imagined - far too much. though this is probably for the best, watching another second of my boyfriend touching another girl would probably drive me close to insane - if i haven't already reached that point. i can't tell when the video was taken, but it is clearly recent, most likely from one of his tour after parties. he had arrived home last week, and i had been naive enough to miss him - until now.
i hurriedly rush to turn the computer off, sure that i will throw up if i have to watch that video one more time, its existence torture for me as i question how to go about this. tom is totally oblivious, having left for the studio this morning. however as each second passes, i realise that he will be home any minute, long before the anger that courses through my veins has any chance of burning out. my jaw is clenched, breathing heavy and eyes bloodshot as they fight tears, focusing on the blank wall ahead in an attempt to hold them back. the silence is peaceful, an almost laughable contrast to the chaos that echoes within my mind, thousands of unanswered questions racing through it as i am just about ready to pack my bags and never come back, sure that i have seen enough - and the only explanation is that tom has cheated on me.
but when the front door opens, i am trapped, any plans of escaping now far out of reach as tom's soft voice sounds from downstairs.
"baby? i'm home, where are you?" he almost sounds excited to see me, and on any other day, my heart would melt. but today, it twists with dread, feeling as if it has been ripped out of my chest and stepped on. i stay put, maybe because i know the capabilities of my mind, and its tendency to place me in uncomfortable situations, or perhaps it is the nagging in my chest convincing me to delay any conversation with him for as long as is physically possible.
the realisation that i can't avoid him forever comes much faster than i had anticipated. the dull thud of his footsteps trudging up the stairs are enough to capture my attention and pull me out of whatever trance i am subject to. my back falls back against the bed, shoulders slacking with the intent of looking as relaxed as possible, even if the current situation is the exact opposite. i wince when his presence makes itself known, attempting to conceal the uneasy look settling across my face.
"schatz, there you are." there’s no ill intent in his voice. infact it is sickly sweet, laced with an all-too innocent sense of security that on any other day would gravitate me towards him. this part of his day, when he would trudge into bed tiredly, was reserved just for me, for us, and it was something that we both looked forward to. but now it has fizzled out on my end, an excruciating discomfort habituating in its place, becoming harder to ignore with each passing second. the seemingly rigid walls into tom’s heart visibly crumble as he lets his guard down, his tired frame sinking into the soft mattress.
he leans his head against my arm, the limb tensing slightly in response to his touch. it feels wrong. how many other women felt him this close? the thought alone brings a sharp stab to my chest, its non-existent blade twisting within at the almost sickening idea of the same hands touching anybody else. with difficulty, i lift my arm up, heaving it to rest loosely across my torso. from the rigidness of my movement, tom senses that something isn’t right. whether it be impulse or a craving to feel me against him, he readjusts himself, grasping at any opportunity to weave himself even closer, my stiff demeanour offering him the upper hand.
the concept of control seems completely out of grasp now. although unaware, tom tears every remnant of serenity from my still frame, forcing me to follow his gaze and finally look into those eyes. his lips tug into a soft smile at the eye contact, pointer finger aimlessly grazing my lips. though emotionless, he appears to miss the look on my face, far too occupied with his own desires, no matter how light-hearted they seem.
“you have no idea how much i’ve missed you.” he mumbles against me, but when i dodge the kiss that he tries to place on my cheek, he finally pulls himself out of his selfish trance and realises that things aren’t as perfect as he had thought.
"hey, give me a kiss." his voice boarders the waters of hurt and confused, eyebrow furrowed with his eyes scanning my own desperately. when i don’t respond, he misjudges my silence for compliance, leaning downward to plant a soft kiss onto my lips. i don't reciprocate, remaining motionless, eyes wide open as he wraps his arms around me. he presses his lips harsher onto mine, desperation the clear motivator of his hurried movements. it quickly fades into concern when he realises the still lips that his own try to move against. breaking apart and surrendering his desire, he finally captures the hurt etched upon my expression, eyes trailing off into the blank wall behind him. he remains on top of me, his hand reaching to cup my cheek gently, the touch providing the exact opposite of consolation - instead allowing the bitter taste of resentment to settle along my tastebuds in place of his tender kiss. another woman felt those hands against her.
"look at me. what's wrong? did i do something?" his eyes scan mine desperately, feverishly attempting to fathom reasoning for my sudden standoffishness, all whilst his thumb rubs slow and soft circles along my cheek, an action which doesn't go unnoticed.
"did you think i wouldn't find out?" my jaw clenches, eyes narrowing as i finally push his body away. his confusion only intensifies as he collects himself as quickly as he can, scrambling to stand up and reduce our distance once again. his figure towers over mine, clearly failing to grasp the hint that i practically throw at him. if my actions aren’t able to spell it out for him, my words make what i want crystal clear.
“don’t touch me.”
though subtle, i notice the way he winces at my words, choosing to let them go for the time being. "what? baby what are you talking about? find out about what?" his chest rises up and down, expression totally readable, so much that i can sense his every thought, and it is terrifying. each second of silence thickens the already heavy air, so much that a heaviness begins to set in my chest.
i say nothing, instead walking toward the computer and switching it on. the screen lights up, the all too familiar video resuming from the point that i had left it. i grit my teeth, tempted to punch the screen and tom, both ideas becoming increasingly appealing. i turn to face him, remaining calm in spite of all brutal urges screaming out from within me, deciding to put them to bed.
"see for yourself. i'm sure you'd love a reminder of your little fling. she's very pretty, i'll give you that." his mouth opens to say something, quickly shutting with the realisation that he doesn’t have any words - none that would make the situation any better, anyway.
"shit, the paparazzi." he mumbles under his breath, massaging his temples a couple times before shutting the computer off, his eyes darkened as an unrecognisable look takes over. “schatz that isn't what it looks like, i promise you-"
"really? so i haven't just witnessed by boyfriend cheat on me with some blonde whore? you tell me you missed me? you seem to have got on swell without me.” my instinctive sarcasm soon burns out, replaced with an unexpected sadness, one that makes it next to impossible to remain composed.
"jesus christ. i wouldn't ever cheat on you. i don't even know who she is, georg said that he knew her so we let her hang out with us for the night. nothing happened, nothing at all. i love you and only you." he begins to get more defensive, voice raising slightly as he tries once again to move closer to me, an effort that even he knows is futile.
"what so you whisper in everyone's ear like that? you touch everyone's arm like that? you smile at everyone like that? i’m not as stupid as the whores you take to bed.” his excuses are almost laughable, and if my heart didn't feel so heavy with the realisation that he hasn't stayed faithful, i would probably laugh. my composure is deceptive, this soon coming to light with the coming of tears along my waterline.
"no, baby, please don't cry." he starts, protective instincts taking over in spite of the situation, his own eyes becoming glassy. when i shoot him a glare he knows to step back, though it is clear he wants nothing more than consoling me, as he usually would. now it is different, when he is the fuse that ignites this entirely fucked up situations "look, that's the only time i spoke to her the whole night. we were making a joke about georg, that's all."
"you must be kidding." my brows raise, searching his eyes for any hint of amusement, quickly understanding that he is being completely serious, this realisation only angering me more. “you know what? i’m leaving.” i attempt to move past him, struggling to progress even a few steps forward when he grabs my wrist, pulling me back in front of him. he is far too strong for me to put up a proper fight, but that doesn't stop me from trying my body tenses as i pull back, his grip only tightening, proving my efforts as worthless.
"can you just listen to me? i get that it looks bad but you're really overreacting here. Ive told you that nothing happened, why can't you just trust me?" he is no longer sympathetic. instead, his voice holds an anger within it that takes me aback slightly, his change in persona almost frightening. though his sudden defensiveness only alerts my suspicions more, silently reaffirming the fact that he has cheated, even if his words tell otherwise.
"trust you? fucking trust you? i have trusted you! and look where its gotten me. do you know how hard it is to have your boyfriend leave for months? no contact besides from a ten minute call every day, not a kiss, a hug, nothing! and this is what i see from your tour. what the fuck am i supposed to do with that?" i raise my voice, its harshness mirroring tom's as i finally manage to writhe myself out of his grip, now standing a few feet away from him. he clenches his jaw, looking to the side as silence takes over, its presence only brief however, soon destroyed by the sound of his voice, far louder than it had been through the course of the argument.
"i'm sorry that i don't have a normal career, okay? i've told you so many times that i don't have eyes for anyone else. every single night on tour i go back to the hotel early, because i miss you! and you can't even trust me!" he stops suddenly, almost as if he is contemplating his next words, enduring a silent battle between his mouth and his heart, knowing that both are leading him in different directions. i wait for his response, noticing the way that his expression darkens, eyes refusing to meet my own.
"well? that's all you have to fucking say? you seemed pretty comfortable with her. do you know how much that hurts? why am i not good enough for you?"
"stop it. you know you're good enough for me. don't say shit like that." he is quick to cut me off, his voice laced with disbelief, clearly failing to understand how i could come to such a conclusion.
"do i? seeing shit like that pretty much reminds me why i'm not-"
"look, maybe if you weren't such an insecure bitch then this wouldn't be a problem!" my face drops, lips parting slightly as i pray that my ears deceive me, creating their own truth, one distorted and far from reality. i stay silent, far too astounded to produce any witty comeback, or even look into his eyes. the silence between us is louder than any words spoken, and even more painful than those left unsaid. when i quickly take a glance at him, he realises his mistake just as fast as he had spoken. regret flashes across his face, his expression softening as he walks toward me. i nod slowly, far too defeated to argue back, wrapping my arms around my small frame and walking past him, my entire body shaking slightly as i sob.
"fuck- i didn't mean that. i'm so sorry, god i'm sorry baby." he spews out incoherent apologies, though i am far too hurt to comprehend them, instead tuning them out as i walk out of the room, closing the door harshly behind me.
it doesn’t take long for him to follow, his hurried pleas sounding from behind me. i am far too angry to listen, rushing down the stairs and into the hallway, scrambling for the nearest pair of shoes that i can find. his rambling quickly turns from frantic to desperate when he picks up on the reality of the situation, soon understanding that we are far beyond a kiss and an apology to resolve this.
“wait, hold on schatz. can we please talk about this? don’t leave me, please. i love you so much.” he tries to conceal the small sob that escapes his lips, but i notice it, the almost inaudible sound enough to make me reconsider my choices. but when his arm wraps around my wrist, though not with enough pressure to hurt, i know that forgiving him would be stupid.
“let go of me. i’m leaving for a while. do whatever you want, i don’t care.” my voice is surprisingly calm, the coarseness within it somehow washing away with each shallow breath i take. but the softness of my tone doesn’t match the strength of my movements as i yank myself from his grasp, reaching for my keys and clutching the door handle before he can stop me. i hesitate for a moment, taking a second to look back at him as he continues to spew out his apologies, mixed with incoherent promises that he loves me, along with his own tears that begin to fall from his eyes.
“bye tom.”
please come home, i’m so sorry - 8:35pm
baby? - 8:35pm
i love you so much - 8:36pm
i promise i didn’t cheat - 8:36pm
can we talk about this? - 8:37pm
please tell me you’re safe - 8:39pm
sure, tom and i had arguments just as every couple did. but when i showed up at my best friend’s house, makeup smudged and eyes bloodshot, she knew that this one was more than just a disagreement on who’s turn it was to make dinner. it was obvious that she had questions, but my delirious state was enough of a motive to save those for another time, instead choosing to rush me inside and wrap me up in blankets on her small couch, insisting that we order takeout and watch movies until i calmed down.
“he’s still texting you?” she questions, referring to my phone vibrating yet again, as it had been for the past hour. i nod my head weakly, body sprawled across her couch, shuffling over to make room for the small brunette beside me. she offers a sympathetic smile, handing me a pint of ice cream and sinking into the cushions.
“i’m sorry.” she says, reaching over and pulling me into a hug, noticing the glassy sheet that forms over my eyes, squeezing me even tighter. “boys are assholes.”
i nod in agreement, hearing my phone vibrate once again, this time not even taking the time to look at the message. they had gotten pretty predictable as they became more frequent - either telling me that he loves me, or that he wants me to come home.
“you’re welcome here as long as you need, okay?” she fills in the silence, recognising that all i need is consolation right now, creating a conversation not on the top of my list of priorities. i mutter a small thank you, feeling my eyes becoming heavy.
the beginning of a new day somehow intensifies the feeling within the pit of my stomach, the exact opposite of what i expected from a fresh start. now that i have settled down, the reality of it all feels like a fresh wound, one that i can’t envision myself ever healing from. though any time to endeavour into the complex puzzle of my emotions is drowned out by the all too familiar sound of my phone vibrating, and this time i have lost every ounce of self-control, reaching over to the small device embarrassingly fast. the bright light emitting from the screen causes my eyes to squint as i adjust, vision slowly clearing to reveal at least a hundred unread text messages, each one from tom. my sympathetic nature gets the better of me, a wave of guilt taking over as his messages spring from concerned, to apologetic, to borderline insane at my disappearance. i groan internally, quickly realising that i can’t hide forever, no matter how much i convince myself that it is the safer option.
luckily the task of getting myself ready to go back home isn’t a particularly long one. my jeans begin to dig into my sides, a rather unpleasant yet convenient reminder that i am still wearing the same clothes as the day before. quiet snores from the bedroom alert me to sleeping body of my friend, a small chuckle leaving my lips at the sound. i decide against disturbing her, instead scribbling a messy note and sticking it on the fridge, hoping that she’ll understand.
- going back home, thank you for all ur help. i’ll keep you updated, love you
the house is silent as i enter it, the lack of noise almost eerie though short lived when i place my keys on the table, the metal clattering with a small thud. there is no sign of tom, not even the sound of a tv from the living room, or the quiet sizzle of fresh food, indicating that he is making breakfast as he would every morning. though it seems that i hadn’t entered as quietly as i had hoped, the sound of tom’s steps, quick and erratic, echoing from the kitchen, getting louder and louder until he is standing in front of me.
our distance is temporary, quickly diminished as he takes me into his arms, pressing his lips against mine with as much strength as he can muster. i only realise just how anxious he has been when his palms cup my cheeks. they are shaking, the skin cold against my own as his entire body begins to tremble, my stomach sinking. he is crying. in spite of his vulnerability, he is the first to pull away, firmly wrapping his arms around my frame and hugging me tightly.
“god i love you, i love you so much. i thought you weren’t coming back.” he struggles to get his words out, a mixture of incoherent sobs and quiet sniffles accompanying his speech. his grip only tightens, hands running up and down my back as he repeatedly kisses my hair, tears continuing to fall down his cheeks. my arms remain firmly by my side, sympathetic enough to allow him this small touch, yet no where near as forgiving to consider returning the act.
“are you okay?” he becomes worried, putting his emotions aside and finally separating his body from mine. his calloused fingers run over the smooth skin of my arms, looking for any sign of harm. even though he knows me well enough to guess that i had gone somewhere safe, his protective instincts kick in, convincing him that the worst has happened.
“i’m fine.” i mumble, releasing myself from his grip and walking into the kitchen, taking a glass and pouring myself some water, my throat dry from the strain on my voice from the night before. he quickly follows behind, taking my hand in his. he notices my hesitation, running a thumb over the back of my hand in an attempt to soothe me, and somehow, it works. seeing him in front of me brings back memories of last night, their sting still painful and effects strong with the irritating onset of tears. tom sees this just as fast as i do, reaching upward to wipe them before they are able to fall.
“i’m sorry, i’m so sorry beautiful.” he whispers, his touch so gentle i almost don’t feel it. he replaces his thumb with his lips, kissing just below my eyes, damp with evidence of my upset.
“how could you?” i mumble, voice barely above a whisper as i struggle to make eye contact, tom’s own gaze pained. his eyes are bloodshot, cheeks red and blotchy and entire body still trembling slightly. his face softens at my question, and silence takes over for a few moments.
“i know. i know how it looks. i shouldn’t have gotten so close to her, not when i have you. but i promise you that i didn’t cheat. you’re everything i want and i’d be an idiot to throw that away. you have to believe me baby.” his voice begins to break, thumb running across my cheek and eyes staring into mine, scanning desperately for any sign that i am convinced. it isn’t the most detailed nor thought out explanation, but i know him enough to see that he is telling the truth.
“okay.” i nod my head and look to the floor, swallowing harshly in an attempt to calm my shallow breathing. his fingers come underneath my chin, gently pulling it upward so that i am facing him again. the pain is still there, regret etched upon his expression as seeing the woman he loves in such a state hurts him just as much as me leaving. he takes me in his arms, lifting me up and gently kissing me again. this time i reciprocate, a small sob leaving his lips as he recognises this, his hold on me only getting tighter. the previous lack of contact had affected more than i had realised, the small reassurance of my kiss enough to crumble his usually calm temperament.
“i love you.” he whispers against me, his lips bitter with the taste of tears. that doesn’t matter to me. pressing my mouth to his as harshly as i can, my arms wrap around his neck, bringing him in even closer. he holds me so tightly, like i may slip away, the fear of losing me all too real. my small hands cup his cheeks, attempting to deepen the kiss, though doing so unsuccessfully as his voice vibrates against me. he sounds broken, his request coming out as a desperate plea, cut off by a short sob. “please say it back. you haven’t this whole time and i-”
“i love you too.” i mumble against his lips. he holds me even tighter, something which i didn’t think was possible. but considering the realms of possibility is an activity for another day. i have no time to consider anything as he kisses me once again, his touch addictive, and more than enough to make me forget everything.
this isn’t an imagine but some people in this fandom are genuinely gross, like it’s concerning…
so as u know i’ve already made a post ab this girl for the outright disgusting body shaming that she openly posted on here. i’ve found out that not only does she openly bodyshame but she’s also racist, and in general is a bully. i’ve noticed some people talking to her and becoming her friend which i just do not understand, bc these people have definitely seen my previous post. why do u wanna associate with someone like this??
racism is not cute girl, neither is the body shaming and outright bullying people for their appearance. and fishing for compliments constantly is embarrassing considering the way you actively seek to bring other people down - you certainly don’t deserve any with such an ugly personality. ur age is showing and so is ur immaturity, please find help🤨
++ sorry for the lack of uploads, writers block is reallllll💔
the way my jaw DROPPED. the casual body shaming like excuse me?? who’s gonna tell this girl that you don’t need to be overweight to have stretch marks AND so what if someone is overweight - literally grow up if ur offended by someone else’s body!!! this is the most out of touch, rude comment i think i’ve ever gotten on one of my posts like i am SHOCKED😭😭
pls block and stay far away from me if u agree with body shaming of any kind bc we do not support that over here 💗💗💗 it’s these kinds of people that ruin the fandom oh my god
synopsis: after a long night at another award show, when you and tom arrive back to the hotel room, he's eager to show you the beautiful view from your balcony - in a way you would never have expected.
content: smut
a/n: i'm so sorry for not posting omg😭take this as my apology pls!! andddd i need more tokio hotel friends, so if ur 16+ then PLSSSS send me a message so we can talk! anyway love you all hope you enjoy💗
"beautiful, isn't it?" the low hum of tom's voice from behind snaps me out of my daze, eyes turning away from the complex skyline ahead of me. he offers a warm smile as he nears my stance, resting on the railing of the balcony with a soft hand dangling along the glass. i nod my head in agreement, turning my gaze back to the array of buildings ahead of me, staring in awe at the sea of light that adorns each inch of my vision, the sky, darkened with the coming of the night, displaying the final shades of deep purple before it is covered in a sea of black. i could quite happily sit and stare at the city, easily captivated by something so simple, though when tom rests a hand on my lower back, it is clear that he has other ideas.
“you look perfect baby.” i smile from ear to ear as tom’s breath tickles my neck from behind, thankful that the night is above us, otherwise he would quite easily see the light shade of red that my cheeks have turned. he has told me this all night, whether it be with flirtatious glances that he would spare me when no one was looking, or a suggestive squeeze of my thigh under the table. but he could show it over and over again, and i would still be left the exact same way - though this time i try to hide it. it’s impossible to ignore the steady hand that now trails lower downward, resting teasingly on the curve of my lower back, his lips ghosting the skin of my neck as i try to act like i don’t notice. my gaze remains locked ahead, face not daring to move an inch, knowing exactly what he wants, and more importantly, that i won’t be able to give in if i spare him even a glance.
the view is genuinely breathtaking though, so the task of keeping my eyes on it is not a strenuous one, but it somehow becomes next to impossible when his lips finally make contact with the skin just below my ear, placing a kiss so gentle that it leaves me wondering just what could happen if i surrender my composure, a dangerous mix of nervousness and excitement settling in the pit of my stomach. both of his hands are now wrapped around my waist, thumbs moving up and down the material of my dress, his chin coming to rest on my shoulder from behind. i sigh in relief, thinking that he has finally given up on the desire that has taken over him, regarding his soft touch as a simple act of affection. but it doesn’t take long for me to understand that i have misunderstood his movements, a soft gasp leaving my lips when he pushes my waist backwards, my ass now brushing against his - unmistakably hard - crotch.
“not now tom.” i whine, tilting my head back so that it rests on his shoulder, his breath fanning against my ear as he lets out a soft chuckle, squeezing my hips playfully. it goes silent for a moment, the air carrying nothing besides our steady breathing as tom’s fingers tap against my clothed stomach, though when he presses me against himself once more, i quickly realise that he won’t give up as easily as i had hoped.
“seriously, we can do something later, okay? i want to watch the view.” i attempt to loosen his hold on me, wrapping my hands around his wrists and prying his arms away, soon failing miserably as he only tightens his grip, pressing a slow kiss to my jaw.
“who says you can’t?” he questions, expression blank as i turn to meet his gaze, his eyes peering down at me, heavy with lust yet to be acted upon. i furrow my eyebrows, attempting to figure out what he is alluding to, though he doesn’t make it easy for me unless i say the words.
“what are you talking about?” he finds my cluelessness amusing, a soft laugh leaving his lips as he brings me even closer, my back resting against his chest as he pecks my cheek, his kiss lingering on the soft skin.
“i could fuck you right here schatz. what’s stopping us, hm?” he runs his hands across my hips, subtly grinding my body against his, an elongated sigh leaving his now parted lips. his tongue comes out of his mouth to swipe across his bottom lip, my mind flashing with ideas of what i’d rather him be doing with it, but the realisation of what he has just said is enough to snap me out of it.
“are you crazy? anyone could see us!”
“what from like 15 floors up? it’s just us baby, c’mon, let me make you feel good.” my mouth opens to speak, though it is cut off by his soft smirk as i realise that he makes a valid point. i race to think of reasons why we shouldn’t do this, reasons beside from this not being morally right - the look in his eyes tells me that he is far beyond caring about that. he looks downward at me, his gaze becoming more enticing as it rakes down my figure, only making it harder for me to give a good explanation for why his idea is ridiculous.
but i have taken far too long for tom. each waiting second has been torture for him, and the realisation of this comes along with his harsh kiss as he plants his lips onto mine, turning my body to face him, my lower half now flat against the glass railing behind us. he pushes his crotch against my own, with much more intent this time, his baggy jeans seeming to feel even tighter as his cock pulses through them. somehow we mutually agree to skip the soft and innocent kisses that lead to what we both want, the movements of our lips fast and hungry as he bites down on my bottom lip, earning a quiet moan that allows him to slip his tongue inside my mouth.
the harsh bite of the wind doesn’t matter anymore, its bitterness seemingly non-existent as tom’s touch warms my entire body, igniting a spark within it that leaves me nothing short of desperate, my hands communicating this hunger as they trail to the button of his jeans. he smirks against my mouth, taking my bottom lip into his own and sucking slowly, noticing how my movements falter at the sensation. he tastes of vanilla and cigarettes, the combination addictive as i seek to taste more, pressing my lips onto his own even harsher than before. his hands explore my body feverishly, freeing himself from the restraints that being in the public eye all night had brought as he takes advantage of the fact that we are alone - the skyline our only witness.
when he finally pulls away, lips swollen, chest heaving up and down, his eyes flicker between my own gaze and my cleavage, the hurried nature of his movements leaving me a mess, with my breasts practically spilling out of my dress. his tongue comes out of his mouth, swiping across his bottom lip and resting on his small piercing, only taking a few seconds to admire the view as just seeing it clearly isn’t enough. he pushes me back against the glass railing once more, my back hanging off of the edge slightly. i should be scared, considering that i am at least two hundred feet off the ground, though somehow adrenaline only continues to pulse through my veins, fuelled by tom’s touch as his hands reach for the small straps of my dress on each shoulder, hurriedly pulling them downward until my breasts are freed from the material.
“so beautiful.” he mumbles under his breath before attaching his lips to my nipple, swirling his tongue around the sensitive bud as i cry out, my head falling backward to better his access. my hair blows slightly in the breeze, the cold wind causing me to hiss slightly as it hits my nipples, but the pain doesn’t last long as tom works against them. his hand fondles the breast that his mouth can’t, running his thumb over it as his teeth graze against the other, creating a dangerously addictive mix of pain and pleasure that leaves me pleading for more. only when he pulls away from one breast and turns his attention to the other do i notice the faint purple marks littering my chest, the skin beginning to bruise as his hand runs over it in an attempt to soothe the slight stinging pain that emits from it. my own hands push his head further into me, earning small groans from him that vibrate against me when i pull on his braids, silently encouraging him to carry on - if my inaudible moans don’t do that already.
his head emerges from my chest, his lips pink and breathing ragged, a slight smirk etched upon his face when he sees his work, an array of deep purple bruises scattered around the skin. he runs his hands over my breasts once more, squeezing the flesh gently, his movements faltering and mouth falling open when i cup him through his jeans, his length throbbing against my palm.
“fuck, you see what you do to me schatz?” his head is tilted back slightly, adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallows, a deep groan emitting from his throat when i apply a little more pressure, making me realise just how sensitive he is. his eyes flutter open and closed, trying desperately to watch my small hands as they run up and down his clothed length, the minimal contact driving him crazy. i continue to tease him, taking the opportunity as it is a rare one, control never something that i have when we are like this. though when my fingers trail along the waistband of his jeans, it becomes clear that he is done with whatever game i think i have started, his strong grip wrapping around my wrist as he tugs my hand away.
his eyes stay locked on mine as his hands move to the button of his jeans, undoing it and tugging the zipper down. he stops there though, stepping forward and collecting my hair in his hands, moving the loose curls to the side. before i can question what he is doing, he leans downward, his breath fanning against my neck, warm against the cold breeze. his lips ghost against the skin, pausing for a second, only to attach themselves to it, sucking slowly as he places open-mouthed kisses just below my ear. he knows that this spot drives me crazy, smiling against my skin when i moan in response, the pace of his kisses never speeding up as he keeps them slow and steady. he takes my skin in between his teeth, biting down gently before running his tongue over where his mouth has been. he repeats his motions, trailing his lips down to my collarbone, leaving soft marks as he goes along.
i am far too lost in pleasure to register the sound of his jeans being tugged down, instead my eyes remain shut, heavy breaths leaving my mouth when his lips linger for a few seconds, kissing my skin gently. my mind is somewhere else, lost in the addictive feeling of his lips on my body, not even noticing the low hum of his voice against my skin, until he bites down on it a little harsher than usual. my eyes shoot open as i hiss slightly, his lips kissing the spot repeatedly as a silent apology, the dull pain fading away with each kiss. he halts his movements, keeping his head securely in the crook of my neck.
“turn around. i want you to bend over the railing for me.” his voice vibrates against me, soon replaced by his steady breathing as he feels me nod against him, this enough for him to pull back, eyes studying me intently as i turn my body, now facing the cityscape that i had been so desperate to admire moments ago. though now, the hundreds of buildings in front of me don’t matter anymore. the shining lights, dark sky, low hum of the city, it is all nothing but a distraction from what i really want. and when i push my ass further backward a little, my upper half leaning over the balcony, tom begins to realise that too.
i feel his hands circle my ass, restricted by the thin material of my dress, this frustrating both tom and i as he moves to lift the material upward, letting it bunch up at my lower back. his breathing gets caught in his throat for a second, eyes glued on the sight in front of him, now only restricted by the black lace panties that leave little to the imagination.
“i need you so bad, oh my god.” if his words don’t show his desperation enough, then he makes sure that his actions do, fingers wrapping around the material of my panties as he tugs them down, the cold hair hitting my now exposed heat as i shudder slightly, not yet accustomed to the sensation. my eyes struggle to stay focused on the view ahead, desperate to turn around and focus on the man behind me, the urge becoming too strong to resist. i turn my head, eyes drifting down to tom’s hands, quickly registering where they are. his fingers slip into the waistband of his boxers, groaning slightly when his hand brushes against his length through the material.
“please…” my voice comes out as a low whine, almost pathetic as tom’s head shoots up, eyes meeting my desperate gaze as he smirks at my plea. he doesn’t tease me as i expect though, instead sliding his boxers down, his cock freed from its restraints. it almost hits his lower abdomen, the tip red and leaking pre-cum. my eyes widen at the sight, the aching sensation between my thighs only intensifying. he takes his length in his hands, beginning to pump himself a few times as his head falls backward, jaw clenching and eyes squeezing shut.
“fuck- you ready schatz?” he strokes himself a few more times, positioning his tip at my entrance. he places both hands firmly on my ass, circling the skin before placing a harsh slap onto it, my entire body jolting forward, going next to crazy as the pain only fuels my desire. he knows that too, spreading my asscheeks and smirking when i nod my head rapidly. he runs his hand over the skin, soothing the harsh red mark that his touch has left, its pain more enhanced by the cold air as it continues to hit my skin. he runs his tip through my folds, collecting my wetness as i whine in frustration, moving my hips backward in an attempt to put his dick inside me myself.
“stay still or i won’t fuck you at all.” he plants another harsh slap to my ass as i hiss in pain, feeling the skin turn red. his touch lingers there, easing the pain just a little bit as he resumes his motions one more time, his tip now prodding at my entrance. “you gonna be good for me, yeah?”
i nod my head eagerly, willing to do next to anything if feeling him inside me comes with it, even if i look completely pathetic: bent over in front of him, practically at his mercy. i almost lose balance when he finally begins to push himself into me, my hands clutching onto the railing so hard that my knuckles begin to turn white. he lets out a loud groan from behind me, mixed with the high-pitched moan that leaves my own lips as he stops about halfway. my walls clench around him, attempting to work through the slight pain that courses through me as he stretches me out, my mind silently wondering how the rest of him will fit. i whine at the sensation, already feeling so full despite knowing that he isn’t all the way in. tom senses my discomfort too, bending down to place a soft kiss on my neck, pushing inside me a little further in the process.
“i know, i know. taking me so well princess.” his praise is enough for me to take all of him, nodding my head and mumbling a quick ‘keep going’. he knows better than to question me, instead continuing to push his length inside of me as i cry out. a string of curses spill from his lips, his grip on me seeming to get stronger as i feel him bottom out, his body now flush against mine. i hear his loud and rapid breaths behind me, often cut off by quiet grunts whenever i clench around him.
“please…move.” my voice is breathy, coming out as an almost inaudible plea, though i quickly recognise that tom has understood me when he moves his hips backward, almost completely pulling out, before slamming back against me, his dick disappearing back inside me. i can’t keep my head up anymore, letting it fall forward as i lose all control of my body, becoming more and more weak with each strong movement of his hips. he repeats his motions, moving backward so that only his tip remains inside me, then quickly pushing his cock through my walls, so deep that i swear i can feel him in my stomach. tom notices that my head has dropped, no longer focused on the view ahead that i had been so insistent on watching. he reaches forward whilst continuing to thrust into me, a steady hand wrapping around my neck as he uses it to lift my head upward, eyes now met with the array of buildings ahead once again.
“you said you wanted to watch the view.” he changes the angle of his hips as he speaks, his tip now drilling against my g-spot, rather than brushing against it every few thrusts. i let out a high-pitched moan, eyes rolling to the back of my head at the new sensation. if it weren’t for tom being behind me, my legs would have given out. he doesn’t give up though, his hand now holding my chin securely, preventing my head from falling forward. “so watch it. can’t do that if you won’t even look.”
“can’t…can’t do it-” my slurred speech is cut off by a loud moan when his pelvis brushes against my clit with just enough contact to make me really feel it, my body jolting forward once again. i hear tom chuckle from behind me, beginning to speed up his thrusts as he continues to hold my head in place.
“oh baby, look at you. you can take it. just keep those pretty eyes ahead, okay?” his voice is soft, cut off by his quiet groans whenever he would bottom out, his tip continuing to hit the sensitive spot inside of me. i nod my head, drunk off of pleasure, yet his praise encourages me, prompting me to keep my head up, even when my eyes roll to the back of my head. he tests my ability, slowly moving his hand away from where it had held my chin in place, a low hum leaving his lips when i manage to keep it upright. “there you go. just like that honey, good girl.”
i moan in response, clutching onto the railing as my vision starts to blur, an array of lights consuming my vision, stomach beginning to tighten with the coming of my climax, knowing that i won’t be able to hold on much longer. his hand falls to my breasts, beginning to squeeze the flesh roughly as his thrusts become more erratic, hitting my g-spot effortlessly, earning a loud whine from me each time. he takes my nipple between his fingers, squeezing it slightly as i moan at the sensation, the knot in my stomach only tightening. he picks up on this quickly, trailing his hand down to my clit, starting to rub fast circles over the sensitive bud, watching as my entire body begins to tremble.
“i’m so close…gonna cum.” my speech comes out slurred, almost indistinguishable amongst my frequent moans, though when tom slows down his thrusts, it is clear that he sees that i am close. he wraps an arm around my waist, using it to pull my body upward, back now flush against his chest.
“hold it for me baby. just a little longer, doing so well.” his breathing comes hot and fast, fanning onto my skin before he replaces it with his lips, taking my ear lobe into his mouth and biting gently. he releases it, kissing the spot just below it as i cry out in pleasure, my release getting closer and closer, seconds away from being pushed over the edge. he speeds up his thrusts, pushing my body downward once again and forcing me to hold onto the railing for support. he lands a few harsh slaps onto my ass, kneading the flesh and using it to build up his pace, chasing his own climax as i clench around him, doing everything i can to hold back from letting go.
when his cock begins to twitch inside me, his hips faltering against me, i know that he is almost there too. i attempt to match his thrusts, moving my hips backward as our skin slaps together much faster than before. this clearly has an effect on him, his moans becoming much louder. i turn to look at him, knees almost buckling at the sight. his eyebrows are furrowed, jaw slack and mouth wide open, forehead lined with sweat as he maintains a steady hold on my hips, guiding them back and forth as i continue to meet his quick movements.
“there you go. just like that, fuck yeah. keep going, i’m so close schatz.” he speaks through ragged breaths, nodding his head slowly, his mouth falling open even further when i clench around him once again. he twitches inside me for a final time, his thrusts pausing momentarily, cut off by the verbal confirmation that he has reached his climax. “cum for me, let go baby.”
his permission is all i need to let go of the knot in my stomach, my release washing over me as the only word that i am able to say is his name, the word spilling from my lips over and over as i cum. he groans from behind me, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as his head falls backward, ropes of his hot cum shooting into my walls, his hips continuing to rock back and forth as he fucks it into me, inaudible moans pouring from both our lips. his muscles tense as he squeezes my hips, nails digging into the soft skin as his dick continues to twitch inside me, his release coming in thick ropes as it coats my walls. his movements come to a steady stop, followed by his cock slipping out of me, a mixture of our juices running down my thigh. he turns me around, smirking downward at me, his pointer finger coming to collect the juices that have ran down my leg. his eyes never break away from my own, his body flush against mine as he takes his finger in his mouth, groaning at the taste. all i can do is watch, staring as his fingers exit his mouth, only staying silent for a while as he quickly attaches his lips to my own, capturing them in yet another rough kiss.
“see how good you taste?” he whispers against my lips, sucking on the top one before releasing it. i cringe slightly at the taste, a mix of sweet and saltiness settling on my tongue, the kiss soon turning passionate as i reach upward, wrapping my arms around his neck. he smiles into the kiss, bending down and snaking his hands around my lower back, hoisting me upward so my legs are tangled around his waist. i squeal when he lifts me up, giggling against his lips as he begins to walk off of the balcony and back into the hotel room. though any playfulness that had existed seconds ago is suddenly long gone when my back collides harshly with the bed, sinking into the soft and previously untouched sheets. tom quickly climbs on top of me, ripping his shirt off in the process, soon making me realise that our rendezvous on the balcony was only the beginning.
tom laying with reader on the sofa, bill and tom start arguing, tom walks out into his car, reader then follows and gets in his car, hes all gripping the steering wheel, they talk about it, after he smirks and gets in the back and reader follows, sitting on his lap. he takes his anger out on her and they fuck hard, windows get all steamy and hes gentle after. dont forgot his whines and stuff, just like we talked bout
dankeschön meine schönes madchen💋
COOL OFF - T. KAULITZ
synopsis: after a heated argument with bill, tom decides to go and sit in his car for a while to calm down. you eventually join him, things taking an unexpected turn after the two of you talk about what happened.
content: smut (what else do u expect from my page anymore LMAO)
a/n: hope u all enjoy!!
“you were the last person to see the fucking guitar bill. i swear to god if you’ve broken it.” tom’s voice begins to raise as his eyes shoot daggers to bill from across the room. he is sprawled out across the couch with his arm draped loosely around my shoulder from behind as i sit beside him, silently watching the argument unfold. it had started as a normal conversation, tom bringing up that he had told bill to put one of his guitars away, though it soon turned sour when bill insisted that he didn’t know what tom was talking about. their voices begin to raise louder and louder, the hot-headed sides of them emerging faster than ever before. tom still sits beside me, a bottle of soda in his spare hand, his thumb rubbing soft circles onto my arms despite the harsh tone of his voice.
“tom i’ve told you i don’t know where your fucking guitar is.” bill, clearly the more rational of the two, calmly reminds his twin brother, his voice much quieter than tom’s as his hands rub over his temples, his body lazily walking over to the fridge as he grabs a bottle of water from it, returning back to the couch opposite.
“god i can’t trust you with anything, can i? do you have any idea how much that guitar cost?” any composure within tom’s voice is now long gone, his hand clenching the glass bottle in his left hand and slamming it on the table in front of us forcefully.
“maybe if you looked after your things yourself this wouldn’t happen! i’m not your slave tom, it’s not my job to look after your shitty guitars.” bill rolls his eyes, taking a swig of water before eyeing tom as he removes his arm from my shoulder.
“where are you going?” i mumble as he stands up, his gaze dark, though it falters momentarily when he hears my voice, soft and calm as i look upward at him.
“i just- i need to cool down. i’ll be in my car.” he squeezes my thigh before turning his gaze to bill once again. he takes a few steps closer toward bill, pointing a finger angrily at his chest. “you better find that fucking guitar bill, i swear to god.”
and with that, he storms out of the room, slamming the door harshly behind him, leaving nothing but a bitter atmosphere in place of his presence. i sigh loudly, tapping my foot quickly against the ground, hating to see tom upset, especially when it is because of a stupid argument with his brother. i would usually feel bad for bill, but this time he seems completely unbothered, muttering something in german under his breath before returning his attention to the small television in the corner of the room.
“should i go after him?” i ask quietly, bill looking toward me and offering a soft smile, shaking his head slowly.
“leave him. if he wants to act like a child let him, i’m not going to stop him.” he shrugs his shoulders, spreading out on the couch and dipping his hand into the bag of chips that lay on the coffee table, clearly no where near as affected as tom is by the whole situation.
my hands immediately rush to my arms, running up and down the bare skin when i exit the building, the january breeze icy as it creates goosebumps across my body. i quickly spot tom’s car in the already empty parking lot, the grey sports car tucked away in one corner. the tense atmosphere somehow lingers when i approach the car, tapping on the window of the passenger side, tom’s head quickly turning around toward the source of the noise. his eyes are angry, jaw clenched as his hands clutch the steering wheel, so much that his knuckles begin to turn white. though his gaze softens temporarily when he notices me, one hand coming downward to unlock the door. i open it, cautiously stepping in and sitting down. an uneasy silence begins to form, one that would never be there unless a bad argument had happened, these occasions somewhat rare between tom and his brother.
“are you okay?” my voice is soft, barely above a whisper as i test the waters, attempting to gauge how angry he truly is, extremely careful to avoid him lashing out on me. not that he would mean to, however knowing tom as well as i do comes with the realisation that his temper is easily lost in moments like this.
“i swear to god i can’t trust him with anything.” he faces away from me, head turned to the side as he speaks, his leg bouncing up and down in frustration. but his facial expression shows only a minimal amount of his anger, his knuckle colliding harshly with the wheel, a red mark forming in place of the soft skin. i flinch slightly, and when he turns to look at me eventually, he must notice the unmistakeable look of fear etched upon my features, my body inched away from him.
“shit i’m sorry schatz.” he sounds defeated, a steady hand coming to rest on my thigh comfortingly, his thumb rubbing soft circles over the clothed skin, watching carefully as i begin to loosen up, calming down at the realisation that he isn’t frustrated with me. “it’s just annoying, you know? i ask him to do one thing for me, and he manages to lose one of my most expensive guitars. how does someone even lose a guitar? they’re pretty difficult to fucking miss.”
i nod understandingly as he rants to me, his tone still angry and the volume of his voice gradually getting higher. i quickly realise that letting out his feelings isn’t helping him to cool off, in fact it does the exact opposite - his rambling soon becoming just as heated as it had been when it was directed at bill. he finishes his speech with a loud groan, moving his head and resting it harshly on the seat, his jaw still clenched and expression harsh. his chest rises up and down, heavy breaths escaping from his parted lips, one hand still remaining firmly on the steering wheel, his veins becoming more prominent as his grip gets tighter, whilst his other hand rests on his forehead, massaging his temples slowly.
he turns his head, taking a not so subtle glance at me, his eyes, darkened and mirroring the rage that the rest of his body display, slowly trailing down my figure. a small crop top sits tightly on my upper half, flared jeans hugging my legs tightly, sucking me in at the waist just enough. my cleavage pokes out of the top slightly, this where tom’s eyes continue to linger, the harshness within them never faltering despite the clear presence of lust that forms along with it.
“come here.” he mumbles, his voice deep as he keeps his body still, the tone of his utterance making it crystal clear that it is not a request, and i have little choice in the situation. his expression never falters as i look at him in confusion, quickly realising that he isn’t going to move a muscle, let alone speak unless i comply with his words. the air becomes thicker as silence passes through it, only destroyed by the muffled sound of my body sitting up, hesitantly moving over to tom’s lap. he says nothing, spreading his legs apart and allowing me more room as i lower myself onto his lap, staring into his eyes without uttering a word. my eyes are innocent, a glint of submissiveness within them that seems to drive him insane as his hands attach themselves firmly to my waist. the pads of his fingertips run along the skin that my crop top doesn’t cover, his touch cold, but equally enticing. his lips are parted, eyes still darkened with rage, the lust within them soon managing to even it out as his hands rub down my waist, my clothed heat directly over his dick, the pressure only increasing as it begins to harden beneath me.
his gaze remains locked on my own, my breath getting caught in my throat when he clutches my hips, moving them over his crotch at an agonisingly slow pace without saying anything, the friction enough for his jaw to tighten a little, his head falling backward. “you gonna make me forget about it, hm schatz?”
i nod my head slowly, my breathing gradually speeding up as he repeats his motions, grinding me over his clothed dick once again. he doesn’t seem to want to remove any clothing, the heavy denim that adorns his lower half staying on, seeming to provide more friction that drives the both of us crazy. somehow he manages to stay quiet, his expression almost blank as he watches my face twist in pleasure, eyes on the brink of closing when his hardened cock brushes directly over my clothed clit, the contact just enough to send waves of pleasure through my body. however his somewhat strict demeanour soon fades away when my hands move to touch the waistband of his jeans, his eyes widening as they now lock onto my small fingers, watching their movements intently. it is this added contact that makes him brush myself over him as a faster pace, his grip much harsher as i now help him out, grinding onto him and matching the fast pull of his hands.
“keep going, like that.” though he won’t admit it, i can tell that he is enjoying this just as much as i am, deciding to conceal the pleasure he feels and instead keep his angry gaze locked on me, the sight enough for me to slip my hands into his boxers whilst i maintain the movements of my hips, desperate for him to make some sort of noise.
his mouth falls open, a loud sigh escaping from it as his hips buckle upward at the contact, the added friction causing a low whine to leave my own lips. he shakes his head when i try to sit up, wanting to feel his dick, not just through the painfully annoying restraints of his clothing. he is quick to stop me, grabbing my hips and placing them back onto his crotch.
“no no no, just…keep grinding baby, feels so good.” i widen my eyes slightly at his request, though i don’t think into it too much, placing my hands flat against his chest for leverage and resuming my movements, taking notice of the way his body begins to relax once again, slumping further into the seat. and when i lean forward, lips colliding with his neck ever so gently, he can’t resist the urge to make noise, an almost inaudible whine sounding from his lips as i kiss the skin just below his ear. his chest rises up and down, breathing becoming more erratic when i twist my hips slightly, his dick now brushing against my clit, the new angle clearly doing something for tom too as he squeezes my hips, groaning into my ear as i continue to kiss his neck.
“getting close, keep going schatz. doing so good for me.” his hands don’t sit on my hips anymore. they now rest on my ass, kneading the flesh as much as he can through the material of my jeans, accelerating my movements when i feel my own stomach begin to tighten. he pulls my head from his neck, the skin now littered in soft marks. though i don’t have much time to study my work as his hand threads through my hair, resting on the back of my head and pulling it harshly to kiss him. it is rough and sloppy, mirroring the desperation of my hips as they grind over him, tom occasionally thrusting upward slightly.
“fuck- i’m cumming.” he groans out against my lips, hands squeezing my skin enough to leave marks as his mouth falls open, releasing his hot cum into his pants as i carry on grinding onto him, moving a few more times before i reach my own climax. i struggle to kiss him back, moaning into his mouth as i rock back and forth onto him, slowing my movements once we have both rode out our highs. he grabs my face once again, sliding his tongue into my mouth and kissing me quickly before pulling away, placing me back onto the passenger seat.
i furrow my eyebrows, though when he hurriedly slips his shirt off, i soon get the idea. he climbs into the back, spreading his body out across the leather seats, his bare upper half resting against the car door whilst his legs are spread out. he rushes to undo the button on his jeans, flashing me a quick smirk from the back as i watch him, still sitting in the passenger seat.
“c’mon baby, take your clothes off.” he breathes out, watching intently as i hurriedly pull my small crop top off, my breasts only held in by the delicate lace bra that is still on. tom’s eyes hook onto my cleavage, his tongue poking out of his mouth to play with the small piercing adorning his bottom lip, a slight smirk etched upon his face. my hands now fiddle with the button of my jeans, just about to undo the zipper. my attempt is soon stopped by tom’s hand as it wraps around my wrist, pulling me into the backseat as i wriggle my way through, my body falling on top of his own. he quickly sits me on his lap, his hands scrambling with the zipper of my jeans as he aggressively tugs them down, forcing me to lift my hips upward as he pulls them from my legs, the lack of space in his car a pretty big inconvenience.
he groans in frustration, applying more force and yanking the denim down, sighing in relief as my bare body now sits on top of his, his eyes scanning the matching pink set that i had picked out. “you look beautiful.” his hands trail down my body, starting out at my chest, running over the lace of my bra, before trailing downward, their touch lingering just above my panties. “but i think you’ll look even better with this off, don’t you baby?”
i nod in agreement, hands reaching behind my back to unclasp my bra, my breasts springing free as tom wastes no time running his thumbs over my sensitive nipples, goosebumps forming over my skin at the feeling. the throbbing between my legs becomes painfully more obvious by the second, quickly making me realise that tom’s jeans are still on. his mouth works on my chest, biting and sucking at my breasts, far too occupied to register my weak attempts to pull his jeans down. quiet whines leave my lips, making it far harder to concentrate on what i really want - and more importantly, the fact that i can’t get it.
“let me take them off.” i whine impatiently, hissing when tom’s teeth graze my nipple. he doesn’t ignore me this time, bucking his hips upward and allowing me space to tug the denim down as he mutters a quiet ‘go ahead baby’, his voice vibrating against my chest. his boxers do a pathetic job at concealing his length, and more noticeably, the hardness of it. a white spot sits at the front from his previous release, and he is far too preoccupied with his lips against my chest to realise when i pull them down, bucking my hips upward to take my own panties off, letting them pool at my knees. he only realises what is happening when i press his tip to my entrance, sliding it in ever so slightly. it is at this moment when he sits back, his back pressed against the car door, eyes glued to his dick as i slowly slide it inside of me.
though the sense of control that i think i have is soon ripped away when in one swift motion, he flips us over whilst being half way inside, his body now directly on top of me.
“nice try baby.” he winks above me, placing both hands on my hips and beginning to slide the rest of his length inside of me, my walls stretching out as they try to become accustomed to his size - something that has never been easy. “let me forget about it all, mhm? just want to fuck you…”
his eyes darken at the subtle mention of the very recent dispute, making the purpose of our rendezvous very clear once again. and i don’t mind that it won’t be a slow, loving moment, knowing that we already share plenty of these. right now, all i want is to feel him move, regardless of the pain that might come along with it. and when i nod my head slowly, eyes gazing upward at him, that is all he needs to begin thrusting in and out of me, not bothering to give me time to adjust. he doesn’t start out slow, ignoring the opportunity to build up stamina and instead exercising his energy into moving his hips against mine so hard that the car shakes slightly. it doesn’t take long for loud groans to sound from his opened mouth, his nails digging into my hips.
when i scream his name louder than i had intended, he smirks down at me, repeating the motion that had elicited the noise out of me, his tip hitting the sensitive spot where i need him most. the lack of space doesn’t matter anymore, in fact it seems to work in my favour, drawing tom closer to me as he hovers inches above my body, his thrusts getting deeper each time. and to confirm our closeness, my eyes flicker downward, noticing the slight bulge in my stomach that comes and goes with each thrust. tom follows my gaze, tongue swiping across his lip when he registers what i am looking at. though i can’t watch for much longer, my eyes rolling to the back of my head.
he quickly regains my attention though, his hand grabbing my own, placing it on my stomach, the pads of my fingertips feeling the small bulge ever so slightly as tom watches my reaction, his mouth hung open and eyebrows furrowed. “you feel it schatz? look how well i fit inside you.”
all that my body can manage is a loud moan in response, teeth sinking into my bottom lip as he almost pulls out completely, forcing his entire length inside me in one fast motion, repeating his actions until i am struggling to see properly. my hands clutch desperately onto whatever they can make contact with, staring at his biceps, lined with muscle as they flex with each squeeze of my hips, until i end up pulling on the loose dreads that hang in front of my face, eliciting a loud groan from tom.
if my eyes had been able to stay open the past five minutes, i would have probably noticed the windows beginning to steam up, though it takes tom’s hand planting itself harshly against the glass for me to realise, a smudged mark left where it begins to trail downward. he places one hand flat against the window, next to where his handprint is marked, using it to stabilise himself as he aims to speed his pace up even more - something which didn’t even seem possible until he proves me wrong, snapping his hips back and forth as his length moves in and out of me faster than i am able to comprehend.
even if my moans are loud enough to overtake his own, it is impossible to ignore the small whines that leave his mouth, gradually progressing into soft groans, my name pouring from his lips as he chants it over again, the noises he makes only getting louder when i clench around him.
“do it again baby, please do it again.” though hazy amidst the tightening feeling that begins to build in my stomach, i manage to register his breathy voice, clenching my walls around him as his hips stutter against mine, his head falling backward with a loud moan sounding throughout the car, prompting me to repeat my motions - something which doesn’t go unnoticed by tom.
“fuck- you’re gonna make me cum baby. so close.” the car begins to get unbearably hot, windows seeming to steam up even more as our bodies move against eachother, lined with sweat and becoming more desperate by the second. he starts circling his hips, changing the angle so slightly that my body itself notices no real difference, not straight away anyway. with a few quick thrusts at this new angle, a series of high-pitched moans spill from my lips at the sensation, his pelvis hitting my clit just enough to stimulate it, giving double the pleasure from a seemingly small action.
“that feel good?” he knows that i am far beyond being able to respond, but even if i could, i would be screaming the three letter word ‘yes’ over and over again, though when my throat turns raw from practically screaming his name, he gets his answer, able to repeat his sharp thrusts until i know i can’t hold on much longer. the distinct smell of sex lingers throughout the car, my body beginning to stick to the leather seats as sweat lines my skin. tom is just as worn out too, but he somehow keeps going despite the rapid breaths that leave his lips, often cut off by deep groans and almost inaudible strings of curses. when his dick begins to twitch inside of me, i know that he is almost there - no need for him to verbalise it, his hands instead roaming my body as he captures my lips in a messy kiss.
i can barely kiss back, my hands wrapping around his neck, trailing down his back as he hisses in pain, never scolding me despite the fact that my nails dig into the skin harshly. in fact it seems to encourage him more as he moans into my mouth, tongue slipping into it as the kiss somehow gets sloppier, lips barely managing to collide together, often interrupted by soft moans. he pulls back slowly, my bottom lip between his teeth, releasing back into place when he sits up almost completely, thrusting into me a few more times before ropes of his cum coat my walls.
he throws his head back, loud whines sounding from the back of his throat as his hips rock back and forth slowly, fucking his cum deeper into me. with a few more deep thrusts, i hook my legs around his waist, drawing him deeper inside me as i let go of the knot in my stomach, my eyes rolling to the back of my head at the feeling, unable to process anything else but the overwhelming sensation, my entire body trembling. his hand moves downward to rub slow circles on my clit, my orgasm continuing to wash over me as my cum coats tom’s dick that still remains inside of me, hitting my g-spot with each thrust. his name falls off of my tongue like a mantra, seemingly the only thing i am able to say, his body on top of mine and cock inside of me all i want to think about - nothing else matters in this moment.
tom stays inside of me, his body collapsing on top of me as we lay, completely breathless, not bothered by the fact that if anybody were to be in the parking lot, they probably would have heard us. he plants lazy kisses onto my neck, his breath fanning onto it afterward as he attempts to calm down, his own body trembling slightly above mine.
“did i go too hard? sorry, i just got carried away. i was so pissed, i didn’t mean to take it out on you schatz.” he wraps an arm around my waist loosely, stroking my hair and looking into my eyes, his own half-lidded as exhaustion takes over his expression. but when i shake my head, smiling weakly at him and pecking his lips, his expression softens, quickly kissing me back.
“it’s okay, i liked it. i’m gonna ask bill to piss you off more often.” he smirks at my statement, hand trailing down to my ass and squeezing it playfully. his eyes land on the window, the faint mark of his handprint still visible, though the glass has fogged up again since. he reaches one hand upward whilst still remaining on top of me, his finger beginning to scribble something onto the glass. i sit up once he is finished, trying to decipher the messy handwriting, sighing loudly when i read it. ‘thank god for tinted windows ;)’
“charming.” i roll my eyes, smiling playfully and locating my clothes, this much easier to do in the back of his car. i throw tom his jeans, reaching to the front and grabbing our t-shirts. tom somehow finds my bra before i do, insisting to put it on for me, turning my body around and joining the clasp. he slips his boxers on, not bothering with the rest of his clothes and instead sitting on the back seat silently, closing his eyes as his head falls back. i groan, throwing his clothes at him once again. “come on baby, you need to make up with your brother.”
I NEED A PT2 TO THE 'DID U MEAN IT' ANGST PLEAAAAAAAAAASE IM BEGGING
DID YOU MEAN IT (2)- T. KAULITZ
synopsis: you see tom for the first time after calling off your casual hookups - unsure of what to make of tom’s confession after he says something that makes them so much more. it seems that he has had a change of heart, determined to put things straight, no matter how hard you resist.
content: angst & smut
a/n: lowk forgot i even wrote did you mean it LOL, i meant to write a part two a few days after but that never happened😭i’d recommend u read part one before this to remind urself of what happened cause this has sat in my drafts for weeks and i have finally found the motivation to finish it🔥
“truth or dare guys come on!”
a noticeably tipsy voice shouts over the loud music, everybody placing their drinks down and walking over to the large circle that begins to form in the centre of the living room. i contemplate joining, swirling the drink in my hand aimlessly, praying that no one will notice me. normally i would rush towards games like this, enjoying the thrill that came along with them. but that excitement is replaced with dread, because he is here.
my friends hadn’t told me that tom would be at this party - knowing that i would never have agreed to come if i had found out. but it was far too late to leave now, my breath catching in my throat when i had spotted him from the other side of the room, my heart aching as the wound of whatever we had is still fresh. and he spotted me too - his eyes locking onto mine, no longer paying attention to the small blonde clinging onto his frame. though a couple weeks had passed since i had walked out, i know that i’m not ready to speak to him yet, so for the rest of the party i ignore him, despite the obvious glances that he sends my way.
and i was able to do so easily - until now. a game like truth or dare means that i have to face him directly, something which i have strictly avoided. my eyes are glued to his frame - adorned in baggy attire as usual - as he joins the circle himself, no longer accompanied by the girl he was with when i arrived. and just when i think i have managed to get away with missing out on the game, i am dragged over to the circle by one of my friends, unable to resist her strangely strong grip. as i near the circle, tom’s eyes dart to mine, somehow spotting me out of his peripheral vision. if my luck wasn’t bad enough, my friend sits just a few seats beside him, tom now not even a metre away from me, this the closest we have been since we last fucked. i ignore his eyes clearly burning into mine, focusing on the glass bottle that is placed in the centre, watching as it begins to spin around.
“the first person it lands on has to choose truth or dare, the second chooses what they have to do.”
the bottle begins to slow after a few seconds, everybody’s eyes fixed on it - everybody’s except tom’s, who still refuses to tear his gaze away from my body. i groan internally when the glass bottle finally stops, landing directly on me. it spins again, landing on some random guy who i hadn’t seen before.
“truth or dare?”
“dare.” i state confidently, deciding that if i am sitting here, i might as well do something fun, rather than answer a shitty question that would probably be along the lines of ‘what’s your body count?’ or ‘where’s the craziest place you’ve had sex?’
“i dare you…” the guy pauses, visibly contemplating over what to instruct me to do, adjusting himself in his seat before continuing. “to sit on the hottest guy in the room’s lap for five minutes.”
seriously? i scoff quietly at his dare, wondering how he failed to come up with something at least a little more interesting. though when i lock eyes with the brunette that had been eyeing me up the entire night, it suddenly doesn’t seem that bad. he is cute, soft brunette curls adorning his structured face, deep green eyes and plump lips, i had spotted him almost as soon as i had entered the party. and he had seen me too, sending me quick glances and smiling at me. the opportunity seems perfect as i grasp it with open arms, standing up and adjusting my dress that was probably too short.
though as i begin to walk over, my steps are quickly restrained as a hand wraps itself firmly around my wrist, pulling me backward to sit on their lap. i turn around, a familiar pair of brown eyes looking back at me, his expression harsh, jaw clenched and gaze darkened. he doesn’t seem at all fazed, his hand remaining firmly on my wrist as he adjusts himself, ignoring the quiet gasps that sound from the people around us. all i can do is stare, somehow unable to scold him like sober me would. i don’t even contemplate getting up just yet, far too shocked to do anything but stare into his eyes, ones that i hadn’t seen since i had caused tears to spill from them the last time we had been this close.
“start the timer.” tom mumbles just loud enough for the rest of the circle to hear, his voice low as he refuses to look away from me. he adjusts my position on his lap, his hands moving to rest on my waist securely.
“what the fuck are you doing-”
“who is that guy?” he completely ignores my question, tightening his hold on me and pulling me even closer, diverting his gaze to the brunette who i had intended to walk over to, though like everyone else he is submerged in conversation with his friends.
“i don’t know.” i groan, feeling his arms tighten around my waist once again, pulling me in so my back is flat against his chest. i hear him tut behind me, his low breaths seeming to get closer and closer to my ear. “maybe i would if you hadn’t fucking pulled me over here-”
“i wouldn’t even let you find out his fucking name.” he quickly cuts me off, voice laced with an anger i hadn’t ever heard before, far beyond the heat of the moment frustration he had displayed a few weeks ago. this time jealousy edges it, the idea of me wanting to entertain another man leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. his lips are now centimetres away from my ear, close enough to be able to just ghost over it, but he stops himself. “you won’t speak to anyone else. because we’re talking about what happened, mhm? that guy isn’t going anywhere fucking near you.”
i scoff at his statement, his bold attitude somewhat amusing. he hadn’t been this possessive ever - when we were fuck buddies we would have sex, then he left. he would take me out for food sometimes, though it always ended in the same way - wrapped up in some random hotel room sheets with his dick inside me, leaving almost just as fast as i had entered. this is new. he had always gotten tense at any mention of me with another guy, yet he never had the guts to call me out. maybe he was jealous, but the most likely explanation is that he simply didn’t care. so why now?
i open my mouth to speak, though i am quickly cut off by the sound of a dull alarm ringing from the other side of the room. the guy that had given me the dare pulls his phone out of his pocket, ending the timer and uttering a quick ‘times up guys’. tom however doesn’t budge, keeping his hands firmly on my waist, despite it being literally impossible for him to have not heard the alarm.
i quickly detach his hands from my hips, standing up and exiting the circle before he can attempt to stop me, wanting nothing more than to be as far away from him as possible. though not because he frustrates me, not because i am seconds away from punching that jealous look off of his face, but because the butterflies that erupt in my stomach from his touch shouldn’t be there - not after i had ended things. my mind had told me that i would be fine without him, and until now i had believed myself. but fuck, i would be stupid to ignore the feeling that his presence ignites, his touch almost enough to make me run back into his arms. though i know that would be irrational, the alcohol in my system not helping my ability to make the right decision, forcing the morally correct part of me to get the fuck away from him before i make a mistake.
the music gets quieter and quieter as i carry on walking down the hallway, pressing my ear against one of the doors on the left, sighing in relief when i hear silence. my hands reach for the handle, pulling it open, silently thanking god that it is not only a bathroom, but an empty bathroom, something that is a luxury at parties of this size. i close the door behind me, turning to face the large mirror above the counter, adjusting my makeup and pulling my dress down - knowing that tom is the reason why it has rolled up so much. the mere thought of him leaves an uneasy feeling in my stomach, his actions totally unexpected and more than anything - annoying.
sure, i had been confident in my decision to cut things off before, but seeing his face and being so close to him proves too much to handle, the unexpected realisation that i am not where near over him beginning to set in. i groan loudly, resting my elbows on the marble counter and placing my head in my hands, quickly realising that i should never have come here in the first place.
the door handle begins to turn, though i don’t even have the energy to see who it is, mumbling a small ‘someone is in here’, hoping that they will move on. though the door fully opens, creaking quietly as i hear footsteps behind me.
“are you fucking deaf? i said-”
my mouth falls open when i turn around, my eyes meeting the brown ones that are the last things i want to see. his dreads hang loosely along his shoulders, tied in their usual ponytail. his expression is stern as he closes the door behind him, twisting the small lock beneath the handle.
“what the fuck do you want, tom?” i sigh, rubbing my temples as the alcohol in my system creates a small headache that begins to throb painfully. he steps a little closer as i move backward, my back hitting the cold counter behind me.
“to talk.” his voice is calm, still laced with anger as he places his hands in his pockets, his gaze never tearing away from mine.
“we have nothing to talk about.”
“don’t play that bullshit with me. we have fucking plenty to talk about.” he cuts me off firmly, tone lacking the composure it had just seconds ago, becoming more frustrated by my somewhat nonchalant attitude. in my head i am screaming, pleading, my mind thinking the exact opposite of what my voice utters, knowing that if i give in, i won’t be able to stop myself. the room turns silent, the uneasy kind that leaves a sinking feeling in your stomach, one that tempts me to leave the room and sprint home.
“i miss you.” he eventually speaks into the silence, tearing it apart with one of the most heavy sentences possible, leaving my voice caught in my throat, unable to do anything besides stare into his eyes.
“the sex you mean? me and the hookups are two different things.” my voice is harsh, probably harsher than i had intended as he scoffs at my statement, shaking his head and clearing his throat. he takes another step towards me, now within arms reach.
“why did you end it?” he completely changes the subject, tone matching the harshness of my own as his eyes narrow, feet shuffling closer to mine as his hands move to rest at either side of the counter, trapping my body between his own and the counter.
“because you said you loved me then changed your mind within ten fucking minutes. don’t act stupid tom.” i shake my head at his stupidity, wondering how he could ask such a question, the answer totally obvious. he still doesn’t budge, arms trapping me against the counter. “why do you care anyway?”
“you wanted to end it, not me. that’s why i care.” as much as it irritates me, he is right. i was the one to call off our regular hookups against his pleas not to. “and that guy is lucky he can walk out of this party alive. he’s been eye-fucking you all night.”
“so what? i’m not your’s tom. i never was. all we did was hookup, i can do what i want.” his jaw clenches at my response as he turns away from me, hands remaining fixed on the counter whilst his head is turned towards the door. he exhales loudly, his grip on the counter seeming to tighten as he grits his teeth, swallowing before looking at the ground.
“what so that’s it then? you don’t even care?” his voice raises now, not far off yelling as he finally backs away, eyes darkened as they scan my own, his expression hurt.
yes i care. of course i fucking care. my heart begs me to scream the words out, to bring him close to me and kiss him like we aren’t complicated. like we have the most simple relationship ever, even though it is everything but. we never dated, nothing beyond a regular hookup, and my heart shouldn’t ache the way it does over somebody who was never mine. somewhere within me, my rational side manages to take control, prompting me to speak after a few painful seconds of silence.
“care about what? look, i don’t understand what you want me to say. we had sex sometimes, now we don’t, that’s all there is to it. bye tom.” each word stabs me in my own heart as i speak them, knowing deep down that i don’t mean any of it, that i will regret pushing him away one day. when my hand reaches for the door, not able to spend another second this close to him, i know that i want nothing more than to show him how i really feel. though the second my palm twists the door handle, it is forcefully pulled backward, my entire body pushed harshly against the counter.
i am unable to object or even question what is happening as tom presses his lips onto mine firmly, silencing any attempts to fight back before i can even utter them. his hands attach themselves to my waist, pushing me further against the counter as his body presses against my own. my eyes close, lips moving to kiss him back without any real thought.
“don’t say shit like that.” he mumbles angrily against my lips, groaning quietly into the kiss as he deepens it, his tongue sliding into my mouth. his lips are soft, just as i had remembered them, always contrasting with the harshness of his metal lip piercing, something which i had grown to love over the course of our hookups - not that i would ever tell him that. never breaking his lips from my own, his hands reach under my thighs, lifting me up and onto the counter in one swift motion. he uses one hand to move my legs apart, standing in between the gap as his mouth works against mine. it is this change in position that soon makes me realise where he is going with this, and no matter how much i want to, i can’t give myself up.
“we can’t.” i mutter against his lips, my words getting through with little success as he mumbles a quiet ‘hm’ against me before kissing me with just as much hunger as before. i place my hands against his chest, pushing him back, though he only takes this as a sign to attach his lips to my neck, planting sloppy kisses all over the skin as his hands run up and down my waist.
“tom we can’t do this.” my voice is much louder this time, firmer than before as he pulls his head from my neck, not moving far as his face is inches from my own.
“why not?” he is breathless, chest rising up and down as his hands still rest on my waist, body resting in between my legs. when i don’t respond, he sighs lowly, moving his head back into the crook of my neck, resuming his lips’ movements on the skin.
“tell me to stop.” his grip on my waist becomes tighter as he presses our bodies flush against each other. the kisses on my skin become much harsher, bordering messy as they aim to caress every inch of my neck. and when i struggle to form words, i realise that tom knows exactly what he is doing, his kisses pausing momentarily to speak. “say you don’t want this. say it and i’ll stop.”
“i-i….” i pause, thinking things through for a second. i choose my words carefully, deciding what to say, wondering if i even mean what is about to leave my mouth. because we both know the real answer, the one that my heart pleads for me to say, even when my words come out as a choked whisper, saying the complete opposite. “i don’t want you. stop…”
“you’re such a bad liar.” he breathes out against my skin, moving to rest his forehead against my own, his eyes flicking between my own gaze and lips, swollen and slightly parted. he doesn’t waste much time though, capturing them in to a harsh kiss, even more desperate than the ones before. his hands move under the small dress that hugs my figure, the pads of his fingertips now dancing along the bare skin of my waist, his touch creating goosebumps along it as i moan lowly into his mouth.
slowly his hands begin to trail down, my mind paying little attention to these small movements, until his finger teases the waistband of my lace panties. my breath gets caught in my throat, lips momentarily stuttering against his own when he wraps his fingers around the lace, tugging it down at a slow pace. his lips still work against mine, only much slower now, pulling away once my panties pool at my feet.
“you have no idea how much i’ve needed you.” he shakes his head whilst his fingers scramble to undo the button of his jeans, pulling them down and stepping out of them. he reaches for his t-shirt, not getting far as i stop his movement, my hands taking the fabric and pulling it over his head, revealing that toned upper half that i had been close to so many times. but no matter how many times i had seen it, i would never get used to it. the muscle that lines his frame, broad shoulders and slightly built arms, trailing down to his somehow perfectly crafted six pack, god he looks good.
and he knows it too, a soft smirk tugging at his lips when he registers that i am staring. “it’s all yours. it always has been, but you had to be fucking stubborn about it.”
he reconnects his lips to mine, spreading my legs apart even further as one finger slips downward, teasing my entrance as i moan into his mouth. i gasp against it when he slowly inserts one finger, knowing just when to curl it to elicit those sounds out of me that he longs to hear. and he knows that whatever he is doing is working, my lips stuttering against his as my head falls backward, legs subconsciously spreading wider. just as i feel myself getting close, he pulls his finger out, placing it in his mouth as his tongue swirls around it, releasing with a small pop. all i can do is watch, my eyes glued to his fingers, staring as they move toward his boxers, hurriedly pulling them down as his dick springs free. his size had always been something that excites me, though now, after being without it for two weeks, my thighs clench together at the sight, needing nothing more than to feel it inside me.
he takes his shaft in his hand, pumping it slightly whilst the other reaches behind my back, undoing the zipper of my dress and pulling it downward. he uses his other hand to pull it completely off of my body, stopping in front of me for a few seconds to take in the view in front of him. his tongue comes out of his lips to gently poke at the metal piercing that adorns it, eyes widening slightly once they make contact with my breasts.
“you’re so beautiful, want you all to myself.” he mumbles quietly, spreading my legs apart and lining his tip up with my entrance. “you ready?”
he waits for my consent, smiling weakly when i nod my head. that is all he needs to begin sliding into me, his head falling backward at the feeling. my walls attempt to stretch out to accustom to his size as i hiss in pain, hands clutching onto the countertop. though i never tell him to stop, deciding that any pain is better than ruining this moment, waiting patiently for it to subside. he finally bottoms out inside me, and i swear i feel his tip prodding at my cervix, the sensation causing my mouth to fall open, tom’s already placing messy kisses on my my chest.
he slides out slowly, almost pulling out completely until only his tip is inside, before thrusting all the way in without warning, my entire body jolting forward at the feeling. he repeats his motions, my body practically on the verge of giving out, hands flying to his chest in search for any form of support. my teeth sink into my bottom lip, hissing quietly as dull flashes of pain wash over me, eventually becoming less and less frequent, instead replaced by pure pleasure.
tom finds a steady pace, his head still buried into my chest as his lips work against it, leaving purplish marks in place of their kiss. my ability to speak is long gone, desperate mewls of his name spilling from my lips as he grabs my hips, using them to speed up his thrusts even more. he moves his head closer to mine, somehow managing to kiss my lips at a slow pace, tongue exploring my own whilst his cock thrusts in and out of me far more relentlessly than ever before.
“doing so good for me, missed this pussy so much…” his praise is cut off by short and almost inaudible groans every few seconds, his nails digging into my waist whenever i clench around him. he pulls his head away from mine, and through half lidded eyes i see his own gaze flash to the large mirror behind us, his pace faltering momentarily as his expression changes, eyes darkening. and before i can question why, he quickly pulls out of me as i whine at the loss of contact, not having long to complain as he takes my body, bending it over the counter as i now look at myself in the mirror, mouth falling open as he thrusts into me once again.
the new angle is almost too much, my body now fully bent over the counter as i almost lose my balance, eyes squeezing shut and eyebrows furrowing. i can feel every inch of him inside of me, every vein seeming to leave its mark inside my walls as i clench around him. my head falls downward, close to being flush against the counter, though tom reaches around to grab my face, forcing me to be level with the mirror once again.
“no no no.” he mutters breathlessly, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as he pauses, holding my face harshly in his hands, his grip likely to leave a mark. “watch yourself. look at those pretty faces you make as i fuck you.”
my eyes almost roll backwards when his tip prods directly against my g-spot, fighting the already strong urge to close, determined to comply with tom’s request as he continues to hold my face, his eyes locked on mine through the mirror. his muscles tense with each harsh movement, face twisting lightly after each thrust, the noises he lets out becoming more and more unrestrained as he gets closer and closer to his release.
“i’m so close.” he groans, finally letting go of my head, trailing his hand downward to rub fast circles on my clit, pushing me closer to my climax as the knot in my lower stomach begins to tighten. my legs buckle at his movements, quickly becoming overstimulated as i try to keep myself upright, pressing my body firmer into the counter. tom’s dick begins to twitch inside of me, signalling that he really is close, the soft groan that leaves his lips quickly followed by a much louder one as ropes of his thick cum begin to shoot into me. his head falls backward, low curses pouring from his lips as his cum continues to spill into me, his fast and deep thrusts fucking it upwards, followed by my own release. my hands clutch onto the counter desperately, using whatever little strength i have left to hold myself up, eyes locked on tom’s face as he cums, milking his cock slowly until he can no longer keep going.
he slides out of me, a mix of our juices seeping out of my hole, soon collected by the tissue that tom grabs from the side. sweat lines his body, showing just how tired out he is, if the loud and heavy breaths that leave his parted lips don’t show it enough. he lazily lifts me onto the counter, standing between my legs and pecking my lips softly, doing so repeatedly until our breathing has returned to its normal pace. he slides my panties on for me, grabbing his own boxers and quickly slipping them on, leaving the rest of our clothes on the floor. his forehead rests against mine, hands reaching to move any loose hairs out of my face.
“i meant it.” he states quietly into the silence, his lips ghosting against mine as i look back at him in confusion.
“you meant what?” i ask, my arms wrapping loosely around his neck. he smiles weakly, his thumb coming upward to stroke my cheek gently as i lean into his touch.
“when i said i loved you. i meant it.” no matter how daunting his confession is, he never looks away, his brown eyes searching my own as he blinks slowly. “i know i was a dick when i said it the first time. i didn’t want to scare you away, because i know it was just sex. and don’t get me wrong the sex is great, but it’s been more to me for a while. it did slip out, but i meant it, and i still mean it.”
my eyes widen, unsure of what to say, slightly hesitant to believe him instantly and instead wondering if this is just another ploy to fuck with my head, like he had done the last time. after a few seconds, i attach my lips to his, the kiss much softer than before, lacking the lustful intent behind it that had brought us to this position. he smiles into it, his hands resting on my lower back as his thumbs creates soft circles over the skin.
“i love you too.” his eyes light up at my response, arms wrapping tightly around my waist as he pulls me into a hug, lips pressing short kisses to my shoulder. he pulls away after a few seconds, smiling and reaching down to hand me my dress, quickly slipping on his own clothes and helping me down from the counter. he glances at the mirror, noticing that it is steamed up, his eyes lighting up as a childish idea flashes across his mind.
‘we just fucked :)’ i giggle quietly as he guides me out of the bathroom, glancing quickly at the mirror and reading the messy writing spread across it, hitting his arm playfully. he flashes me a quick smile, placing a hand on my lower back as we rejoin the party, my eyes immediately locking with the boy from earlier. tom quickly spots where i am looking, his eyes darkening as he refuses to look away. instead of walking toward him and starting a fight like i had expected, he places a hand firmly on my ass, kissing my lips roughly, his eyes still locked on the guy as he scoffs, shaking his head and walking elsewhere.
“i told you that he wouldn’t go anywhere near you. you can’t tell me i don’t stick to my word baby.” he smirks in my direction, taking my hand in his and leading me through the crowd, glancing behind him every so often to make sure that i am okay.
can you make a tom!sub? also i am INLOVE with all your writings💓💓
i was thinking if you could write tom being submissive and the (female) reader not letting him finish untill she says so?also if the story could contain some stuff like handcuffs and you know you know... ( only if your comfortable! )
thank you again and no rush! take your time💓
PLEASE - T. KAULITZ
synopsis: after tom loses a bet that the two of you had made, as promised he has to face his consequence - which involves the roles you usually have in bed completely reversing for the first time.
content: smut
a/n: sub tom has been requested soooo much on my account and honestly i’ve avoided it cause in my eyes he’s like the most obvious dom and that’s all i see him as…but him as a sub is just as hot so i finally decided to write it - i hope it lives up to ur expectations🙏
my eyes light up when i watch tom look down with a cheesy grin plastered on his face, no longer able to hold eye contact after i had blown him a kiss and winked from behind the barrier. i can just about distinguish his features from the dull flashing lights of the venue, and most importantly, the way his cheeks turn a light shade of pink. i made him blush. the bet which, in any other circumstance would be completely ridiculous, had never meant so much until now. the whole idea is somewhat stupid, tom deciding that it would be fun to see who could make the other blush first - clearly under the impression that he would win. the reward, though not explicitly discussed, is the thing that excites me the most, the endless possibilities from the vague prize of ‘getting whatever you want from the other person’ too good to pass up.
and by the way tom shoots me a quick glance, a defeated smile tugging on his lips, he knows that he has lost too. he shakes his head and mutters something under his breath - not that i can hear it, the speakers blasting out the band’s music paired with psychotic fans’ screams stop me from hearing even what the person next to me is saying. his fingers resume their fast-paced strumming on the guitar splayed across his lap, eyes occasionally darting in my direction until he stands on the stage above me, in line with the rest of his band.
“thank you so much for coming tonight paris. we love you all and hope to see you again soon, goodbye!” bill’s voice is followed by thousands of high-pitched screams, the irritating sound only seeming to get louder when tom snatches the microphone from his brother, shouting ‘thankyou’ to the crowd in his thick german accent.
i make my way to the backstage area whilst tom and the rest of the band say goodbye to the fans, throwing drum sticks and guitar picks into the crowd as they would after every show. i flop down onto one of the couches, the loud screaming still not slowing down as i wait for tom to exit the stage, knowing that he won’t be thrilled after losing the bet he was so eager to initiate.
“you did so good baby, i’m so proud of you!” i smile widely when tom walks through the door, standing up from the sofa and engulfing him in a tight hug, burying my head into his shoulder. he smiles weakly, planting a soft kiss into my hair and wrapping his arms around my waist.
“thank you schatz.” he mumbles, his voice somewhat sad despite the wide smiles that remain etched on the rest of his band members faces - the show they have just performed being one of their best so far, practically flawless. tom pulls away and moves to sit on the couch behind me, sighing frustratedly and spreading his body across it. i don’t need to ask why he is so upset - not only because the reason is totally obvious, but he decides to express his annoyance himself.
“i can’t believe you won.” he groans, tilting his head back and letting it rest against the back of the couch. he gives me a small smile, not intending to seem mad with me, instead he seems annoyed with himself. he opens his arms out, gesturing for me to join him on the couch. i move over, sitting beside him as he wraps an arm around me.
“have you thought of anything yet? for your reward, i mean.” the pads of his fingertips run along my arm, his chin resting on my head as i smile slowly, knowing the answer to his question the second he had asked it - hell, i had known exactly what i would do if i won the second he proposed the bet.
“i think i have something in mind.”
“you want to be in control?” his face displays a mix of confusion and interest, his eyebrows raised, slight smirk on his lips. i nod my head, moving closer forward as i already straddle his lap with my hair disheveled and lips swollen - tom having initiated something the second we had entered the hotel room. things didn’t turn out the way he had expected though, my hand resting firmly on his chest when he had attempted to climb on top, as he did every other time.
he tilts his head to the side, seeing that i am completely serious about this. his hands find my waist, fingers threading through the loops in my jeans as he grinds my hips over his already prominent erection. i shake my head when he tries to manoeuvre my hips again, placing my hands over his and stopping his movements entirely. his eyes widen, body stuck in place as he seems startled by my sudden change in attitude, knowing that usually i would be underneath him in this moment. he shifts around a little, squirming beneath me and sitting up slightly, his back now resting against the headboard as my legs are wrapped around his waist.
“stay still.” i rest my hands flat against his chest, watching as his mouth falls open a little, lips parted as he looks up at me, his gaze bordering desperate as i can tell that he wants me to do something, though he doesn’t know how to say it.
i shift my hips to get closer to him, a low groan leaving his lips in the process, soon cut off when i press my lips to his own, his noises muffled into my mouth. and when i begin to grind against him at a more consistent pace, his ability to kiss back seems to diminish by the second, his breath hitching in his throat. i pull away, watching as his face falls in disappointment, clearly wanting more than just a kiss. and i plan on giving him that, as long as he uses his words, just as he tells me to.
though words can wait for now, my actions taking control as i reach forward, my hands finding the hem of his t-shirt as i lift the material upward and off of his frame, revealing his toned upper half. i throw it to the floor somewhere, returning my attention to tom as his hands reach out, attempting to pull my own small crop top off. he doesn’t get far though, his hands roughly returned to his side as i shake my head.
“no touching. not unless i say so.” he seems to understand that he has next to no control right now, that he can do nothing but wait on me, and i can tell that it irritates him, a low groan sounding from his lips. my eyes never tear away from his own, watching the way he stares intently at my cleavage, eyes drinking it all in as i lift my top over my head, revealing the small lace bra holding my breasts in place. his tongue comes out to flick the small metal piercing that rests on his bottom lip, eyes quickly darkening.
“fuck baby…let me touch you- please.” his voice is barely above a whisper, bordering between frustrated and desperate, both causing him to go next to insane as i deprive him of the one thing he relies on to show affection - touch. he begins to squirm beneath me, attempting to create some sort of friction between us, his hips moving up and down along my clothed heat.
“sit still or you won’t get to touch me at all. you have to be patient.” i scold, watching as he nods his head, his movements soon slowing, cut off by his breath hitching in his throat when my hands make contact with the small metal button of his jeans, undoing it slowly. his eyes stay locked on my fingers, watching as i tug the zipper down, showing no resistance and instead bucking his hips upward and allowing me to slide the denim off of his body when i tug it downward, the material pooling at his feet. i quickly slip out of my mini-skirt, our underwear now the only thing separating us, and i can tell that it drives him crazy.
his chest rises up and down, a thin coat of sweat lining his forehead as his entire body jolts with even the slightest of movements, desperate whines leaving his lips when my hands finally palm him through his boxers, the first bit of attention i give towards the place where he craves it most.
“fuck…oh god, oh my god.” his head falls backward, teeth sinking into his bottom lip when i run the palm of my hand up and down his length, still separated by the thin fabric of his boxers. his erection seems to get more and more painful with each second, every gentle touch i press to his clothed dick generating more sounds from his parted lips - small whines soon turning to loud groans, to the point where he can’t handle it any longer.
“please schatz…do something…need it so bad-shit!” his eyes squeeze shut, wincing slightly when i touch his tip through his boxers, this area more sensitive than the rest of him. despite his pleas, i decide to go that little bit further, knowing how crazy it will drive him.
“what do you want me to do tom?” my voice is low, crossing the line between innocent and seductive, creating a sickly mix of the two that seems to drive him crazy. my head moves downward, lips directly against his ear as i take his lobe in my mouth, biting it lightly before releasing it, feeling the way his whole body shivers below me. my lips make contact with his neck, placing slow kisses, just enough to tease him a little more. “you have to tell me what you want baby.”
“you want my hands?” i whisper into his ear, my hand trailing to palm him once again, yet another groan falling from his lips. “or my mouth, maybe?” i take the skin of his neck between my teeth, sucking slowly before letting it go, my tongue running over it momentarily. he stays quiet, his breathing heavy and body becoming more restless.
“or…” i add, pausing for a few seconds, buying time to leave him guessing, pulling back to study his face, the sight enough to resemble heaven on earth - or at least something pretty damn close to it. his eyes are half-lidded, eyebrows furrowed slightly, tongue poking out of his mouth. he watches me intently, eyes fixed on my hand as it moves to grab his own, trailing downward to my clothed heat, placing it flat against my panties. “do you want this?”
he nods his head rapidly, fingers trying to pull the lace from my lower half, not getting far as i pull them back, leaving him even more desperate than he was seconds ago.
“need to be inside you.” he whines, sighing under his breath and adjusting himself once again, thrusting his hips ever so slightly in the hopes that he will feel any contact, even if it is only for a second. but when i smile weakly above him, sitting up a little and reaching for my panties, his eyes visibly light up, thrilled by the possibility of finally getting what he wants. i step out of my underwear, fingers finding the clasp of my bra and removing it from my frame. tom’s eyes scan my body hungrily, starting at my now exposed breasts, moving down to my lower half. his hands reach outward, making contact with my waist as he pulls me closer to him. i let him this time, watching the way relief takes over his expression from being granted the simple permission of touching my body.
the pads of his fingertips trail upward, moving along my stomach, just about to touch my breasts before i stop him, much to his frustration.
“please baby…can’t take it- need you so bad, need to touch you…” he is practically begging at this point, his body tired and sweaty beneath me, desperate for any sort of relief.
“wait.” i state simply, showing him no sympathy, though my actions seem to act as some consolation as my hands make contact with the waistband of his boxers, fingers dipping underneath them teasingly. his breath catches in his throat, breathing becoming even more erratic as i get closer and closer to giving him what he wants, before tearing away his hope and moving my fingers almost completely away. i tug on the waistband, slipping my fingers in once again, inching closer to his dick, the presence of his boxers frustrating to him as i can only do so much with them there. my hand finds his length as i run a single finger down it, a loud moan pouring from tom’s lips as his head falls backward. i struggle to fit another finger into his boxers, the fabric restricting my movements too much - and it drives him insane.
“fuck schatz…take ‘em off, please…just take them off.” he whines loudly, groaning when i slip my hand out of his boxers, only to tug them down ever so slowly, almost too slowly for tom as he bucks his hips slightly. his dick springs free, hitting his lower abdomen and god, the sight is enough to make me cum on the spot. it is almost painfully hard, the veins within it more prominent than ever, the tip red as pre-cum spills out of it. i almost pity him, watching how he grunts at the slight touch of my fingers wrapping their way around the base.
he hisses when i pump him a few times, my thumb moving to swirl around his tip, his mouth falling open whenever i apply pressure. i don’t give him too much, though, nothing that brings him anywhere close to his release, just enough to show him what he can receive, and he craves for more.
“please just sit on it, please schatz…i can’t, want you so bad- fuck!” he attempts to bring one hand to his hard dick, stroking it once before i pull him away roughly, swatting his hand and placing it by his side.
“what did i say, hm? you have to listen to me to get what you want.” all he can do is nod his head, far too focused on my actions as i speak his eyes glued to my heat as i begin to move forward, lifting my hips upward so that his tip is aligned directly with my entrance. my hands place themselves on his shoulders, maintaining a firm hold before slowly sliding downward, taking just the tip inside of me. he whines loudly, hands flying to rest on my waist, his fingers already digging into the skin, bound to leave marks.
i lift my hips upward after a few seconds, his tip sliding out of me as he whines in frustration, desperate for something, anything, besides from being teased like this. he knows that there is no point in trying to do anything himself - realising that i will just stop him. instead, he watches impatiently as i shift my hips downward again, taking a little more inside me than i did last time. i moan quietly at the sensation, his dick slowly stretching me out as i stop when he is around halfway.
his eyes are now completely closed, squeezing shut as his mouth is now wide open, chest rising and falling at a fast pace, clearly far too lost in pleasure from my minimal acts to think about anything else.
“tell me what you want baby.” my voice is more forgiving this time, lacking the harsh tone it had when i scolded him all those times. now he knows better than to initiate anything, his eyes slowly opening when he registers what i say.
“keep going.” he pleads, his hands trailing to my hips, squeezing the flesh roughly. he clears his throat, though his ability to sound even a little bit composed is long gone, and he knows it too, soon realising when he opens his mouth to speak again, his voice low and whiny. “take all of me, please baby…”
i lean my face closer to his own, lips ghosting over the corner of his mouth. “open your eyes…watch me.” i smile when his eyes flutter open, dark and tired, their gaze flickering to watch where we are connected, struggling to stay open when his dick begins to slowly disappear inside of me, inch my inch.
“oh god-fuck…feels so good…” i haven’t even moved yet, staying sat completely on top of him, not circling my hips and instead adjusting to his size, my walls stretched out as i wait for the pain to turn to pleasure. it doesn’t matter that i haven’t done anything yet, not to tom, anyway. the evident euphoria on his face tells me enough, the continuous teasing i had put him through meaning that literally anything is enough to leave him a moaning mess.
and when i begin to circle my hips, grinding them over his pelvis, the noises that sound from his parted lips become louder and more inaudible, once clear attempts to say my name now barely understandable, lost in the whines that take over any speech. his body shines with a thick layer of sweat, highlighting each defined muscle from beneath me as they contract with each harsh squeeze of my hips. i lift them up, almost all the way off of tom’s dick, before slamming back onto it, soft curses spilling from his lips when i repeat my motions, soon finding a fast rhythm. somehow his hands don’t leave my waist, taking advantage of how i allow them to rest there, afraid that i will tear them away if he decides to move them anywhere else. but i see the way his eyes are fixated on my breasts, fighting the urge to close them purely so he can watch the way they bounce up and down with each movement of my hips. there are times when he jerks his hand upward, seeming to hesitate and return it to its position on my waist, though it doesn’t take long for the urge to become too strong.
“let me touch them liebe…please- just wanna touch them.” a string of pleas follow his request, his voice returning to a low whisper as he awaits my response, his head falling backward when i angle my hips a certain way, his tip brushing directly against my g-spot. i moan loudly at the feeling, eyes rolling to the back of my head as i repeat my movement, his tip drilling against it repeatedly. i am far too lost in pleasure to refuse his ask, nodding my head and mumbling a quick and almost inaudible “go ahead baby”.
and he wastes no time, his hands rushing to cup my breasts, his thumbs running over the hardened nipples as he lets out a satisfied groan. he squeezes the flesh harshly, mesmerised by the feeling as the movements of his hands become more feverish, his need seeming to increase as he moves his head forward, allowing his lips to make contact with them. he places rough and open-mouthed kisses onto the flesh, kneading what isn’t in his mouth, sucking on my breast for a few seconds before running his tongue over the skin, his lips leaving a trail of purple marks scattered across my chest.
“i’m so close…please don’t stop baby- fuck, don’t stop- please!” his voice vibrates against my breast as he continues to kiss the skin, often cut off momentarily by a loud groan whenever i clench around him. and i can tell that he means it, his dick twitching inside of me every few seconds, the frequency of his moans increasing with each movement of my hips.
“you’re not cumming yet.” i state through breathy moans, circling my hips and digging my hails into his shoulders. he whines in response, pulling his head away from my breast to look upward at me. “hold it, you have to wait for me, mhm?”
“can’t baby- i can’t…fuck- it hurts so bad…” if i weren’t to desperate to chase my own release, i would probably pity him and let him cum out of sympathy, though now all i can focus on is finding my own climax, my bounces becoming more sloppy and feverish, craving nothing more than to release the knot in my stomach that begins to build.
“yes you can.” i breathe out, taking my hands and pressing them to the back of his head, bringing his lips closer to my breasts and moaning when his tongue swipes across my nipple. “you can cum when i say so.”
the knot in my stomach becomes more noticeable, my free hand moving downward to rub soft circles on my clit, my head falling backward at the overwhelming pleasure, knowing that it won’t be long until i get to my release. i don’t tell tom that, though, watching intently as he can no longer plant firm kisses to my breasts, instead he falls backward to rest his upper half against the headboard, soft and frequent curses pouring from his lips as he holds back his release, the task becoming harder and harder for him as each second passes.
my own head falls backward, eyes rolling back as i finally let go, feeling my release wash over me. i clutch onto tom’s back for support, rocking my hips back and forth slowly as i ride out my high, still aware that tom hasn’t come yet. and i can tell that he can’t hold on much longer.
“please baby…please let me cum- it hurts so bad schatz, shit!” tears begin to roll down his cheeks, soft whines spilling from his lips far more often than before. the slow roll of my hips on his dick doesn’t help - the angle allowing him to hit the deepest spots inside of me, my walls unconsciously clenching around him when the pleasure gets too much. “need it so bad baby, just wanna cum, please…”
my lips collide with his softly as he still tries to kiss back, the taste of tears on his mouth as i move against him slowly. “c’mon, cum baby…” he sighs loudly once he registers that he has my permission, no longer able to kiss back as his head falls backwards, eyes squeezing shut and eyebrows furrowing, loud and elongated groans elicited from his lips as i feel his hot cum shoot into me, coating my walls as i ride out his high.
“shitshitshit…oh my fucking god!” he begins to lazily thrust upward into me, anything to increase the pleasure he already feels, his movements somehow matching mine as he moans into my mouth, his hands glued to my hips. his nails dig into the skin, leaving harsh marks there. eventually, both our movements slow down, tom’s body trembling as it lays against the headboard, his breathing fast and heavy. i collapse on top of him, his dick still inside of me as i rest my head on his chest. he rubs my back up and down, fingers tracing random patterns there.
“fuck me.” he mumbles into the now silent room, my head whipping upward to look at him, his fucked out expression enough to leave me mesmerised, taking in every feature on his face - the way his eyes struggle to stay open, slight wrinkles on his forehead from his furrowed brows, his lips remaining slightly parted, he somehow looks perfect. “you need to be on top more baby, that’s the best sex we’ve had.”
his hand tiredly reaches to cup my cheek, drawing my face nearer to his as he connects our lips. the kiss is lazy and sloppy, still filled with passion as i press my lips firmly onto his own. he pecks them a few more times before pulling away, standing up and pulling me toward the bathroom to clean up.
LIKE READER AND TOM AND THE REST OF THE BAND ARE AT THE BEACH reader and Tom are a couple by the way mhm AND TOM AND READER KISS EACHOTHER IN THE WATER (LIKE TOM ALWAYS SAID HE WANTED TO DO IN INTERVIEWS IF YK THEN YK.) THEN AFTER THAT THEY BOTH GET TURNED ON OR SOMETHING IDK ⁉️🔥 THEN THEN THEY DITCH EVERYONE ELSE AND OMG THEY GO BACK TO TOM'S HOTEL ROOM (zimmer 483 ifykyk) THEN THEY HAVE ROUGH SEX AND READER BE TUGGING ON HIS DREADS N SHIT (just like we talked about😊😊)
Love you🔥🔥🔥
BEACH KISSES - T. KAULITZ
synopsis: after tom gets a little too carried away at the beach, he manages to convince you to leave the rest of the band behind. you both rush back to your hotel, where tom is quick to resume what he had started in the water.
content: smut
a/n: i hope u all enjoy!!
“baby get into the water, it’s not that cold i promise.” tom’s voice causes my eyes to open slowly, the sun immediately blinding my vision. i sit up from the small towel sprawled across the sand, looking toward the water where tom stands, looking at me with a soft smile on his face. he beckons me over once again when i shake my head, wanting to remain comfortable, recognising that it isn’t often i get to spend my time laying on a beach with nothing else to do. tom doesn’t feel the same way however, and has been nagging me to join him in the water for at least twenty minutes now. i sigh whilst adjusting my bikini bottoms, standing up from the towel and making my way toward the water, crossing my arms. a wide smile spreads across tom’s face as i near him, his arms outstretched, revealing his bare torso.
his tongue comes out of his mouth to play with his lip piercing as he scans my body, eyes doing the talking as they drink in my curves, a suggestive smirk tugging on his lips when i reach him. he pulls me into the water with him, walking into it until it comes up to my shoulders, resting just below his chest. his arms wrap around my lower back, head moving downward so his lips are directly against my ear.
“this bikini is driving me crazy.” he begins, his hands trailing downward until they rest on my ass, beginning to squeeze it lightly. “you look beautiful schatz.”
i smile lightly at his compliment, hitting his arm softly and mumbling a small ‘thank you’, my appreciation soon cut off by a quiet gasp as his lips make contact with my neck, fingers moving dangerously under the fabric of my bikini bottoms. he toys with the material, his pointer finger dipping in and out, each time getting closer and closer to my heat. though i draw the line when my eyes flutter open, recognising the rest of tom’s band mates sitting in the sand a few metres away, thankfully too absorbed in their own conversation to look over at tom and i.
“tom.” i mumble as he works on my neck, taking the skin between his teeth and biting it softly before releasing it, his tongue quick to soothe the stinging sensation. his fingers run up and down my slit, clearly not paying much attention as he mutters a small ‘hm?’ against me, still not stopping his movements.
“not here. your brother is sitting right there- oh god…” a breathy moan interrupts my lips when his pointer finger begins to toy with my clit, rubbing soft circles over it. i feel him smile against me, a low chuckle leaving his lips at my reaction.
“he isn’t looking.” he quickly mutters without even glancing at bill, placing a kiss on my shoulder and adding another finger, his movements now much faster. “does that feel good?”
he knows that it feels good. if the way my eyes flutter open and closed doesn’t give it away, then the short whines that leave my lips are a dead giveaway. but no matter how tempting and totally addictive his touch is, i stop myself from giving in, placing both hands flat against his chest and pushing him away. he looks back at me, eyebrows furrowed, his hand slowly coming out from my bottoms to rest on my hip.
“we can’t, not now. when we get back to the hotel, yeah?” i try to reason with him, to come to some sort of agreement that benefits both tom and i, all whilst attempting to ignore the throbbing between my thighs, silently cursing him for getting me worked up so easily . he smiles slowly, that same cocky grin that i have seen so many times returning onto his face. his arms pull me into his embrace once again, fingers playing with the small knots tied at either side of my bikini bottoms.
“you know you want this.” he pauses, moving closer so that his lips are ghosting over mine, the cold sensation of his lip piercing hitting my skin every few seconds. he kisses the corner of my mouth, hand trailing downward to pull my thighs apart. and when he slips one finger through the material of my panties as a low moan leaves my lips, he knows that he has won. “lets get out of here baby, mhm?”
“she just isn’t feeling too good. it’s best she gets some rest, the heat won’t be helping either.” tom explains to the rest of the band whilst grabbing our things. he takes a towel and wraps it around my body from behind, planting a short kiss onto the back of my neck. bill frowns at me, standing up from where he had been sitting and gently pushing tom aside, wrapping his arms around my upper back.
“i hope you feel better soon. if he can’t take care of you, give me a call and i’ll head back too, you know what my brother is like.” bill laughs weakly, kissing my hair as i mumble a quick ‘thank you’, coughing a couple times. i catch tom laughing quietly to himself as he glances at me from behind bill, clearly amused by my attempts at convincing the guys that i am actually ill, even going as far to have to ‘sit down for a few minutes’ before tom and i left - something that he didn’t appreciate.
“come on honey, let’s go.” i stand up slowly, taking tom’s hand and waving a quick goodbye to the guys as they all flash me sympathetic smiles. i turn back around, facing tom who squeezes my ass, slapping it playfully as he hurries me along.
“finally i can have you all to myself, you knew what you were doing wearing that bikini.”
his hands travel along my waist, back, ass, thighs - anywhere he can touch - feverishly, eager to feel every inch of skin as we stumble into the hotel room, lips not parting, even when tom uses his foot to slam the door shut. he groans into my mouth, hands pulling me even closer, pushing me against the door once it is closed, my body hitting it with a loud thud. he pulls away, only to grab my face, angling it backward and attaching his lips to my neck, placing rough kisses against the skin whilst his hands remain firmly on each side of my head.
“so fucking perfect, oh my god.” his voice is low, vibrating against my neck as his lips still work against it, the kisses he leaves somehow getting even messier. he presses his body against me, the hardness concealed by his shorts easy to distinguish. “see what you do to me baby?”
i whine in response, hands pulling him even closer, resting on his neck as he leaves purple-ish marks against my skin, tongue running over them once he is satisfied with his work. he taps my thighs signalling for me to jump, though i am far too lost in pleasure to notice. his lips still attached to my neck, he taps it again, sighing loudly against me and hoisting me upward himself when i don’t respond.
he finally moves his head from my neck, smirking suggestively when we lock eyes, soon pressing his lips to my own once again. this time it is much harsher, even firmer than the kisses he placed onto my neck - if that is possible. he bites down on my bottom lip, the small gasp that leaves my mouth allowing him to slip his tongue inside, the kiss filled with lust as it becomes more messy by the second - tongues exploring each other’s mouths as i moan into his.
all whilst his lips continue to work against mine, he steadies his hold on me, hands gripping my thighs harshly as he walks us over to the bed, dropping me onto it. my body sinks into the mattress, only alone for a few seconds as tom is quick to climb on top of me, hurriedly throwing his shirt off in the process, tossing it somewhere on the floor. he captures my lips in yet another kiss, his hands tracing the outline of my curves. being at the beach moments ago seems to work in his favour - my small two piece bikini the only thing covering the places that tom craves most.
“need you so bad.” he mumbles against my lips in between kisses, hands moving behind me to untie the knot that holds my bikini in place. he groans against my lips, somehow not needing to separate them whilst untying the small knot, doing so with ease as the bikini top falls from my body.
my breasts spring free, only exposed for a few seconds as tom is quick to place his hands on them, kneading the skin firmly as he moans into my mouth. it doesn’t take long for his lips to replace one hand, biting on the skin as whines now pour from my lips.
“so pretty schatz.” he mumbles against me, taking one breast in his mouth whilst his hand kneads the other, his tongue swirling over my nipple. my back arches off of the bed, eyes squeezing shut as my hands find his head, pushing him further into me. he is careful to ensure that every inch of skin is touched by either his mouth or hands, working against my chest feverishly, uttering occasional words of praise, though they are usually muffled by the proximity of his mouth and my skin.
after a few minutes he pulls away, lips pink and swollen as his chest rises up and down, eyes scanning his work as i look down, registering the light purple marks that are scattered along my breasts, ending just below my collarbone. his lips quickly return to my skin, this time moving down my stomach slowly, sucking every so often. each time he moves downward, getting closer and closer to the place where i need him most, i find myself becoming more reckless, more undeniably desperate for him to touch me, thighs squeezing together.
“stop.” he mumbles against my stomach, hands resting on each thigh and prying them apart, crawling further downward as he rests in between them, his mouth now directly above the waistband of my bikini bottoms. his eyes never leaving my own, his fingers hook around the material, dragging them down at an agonisingly slow pace, letting them pool at my feet.
“this all for me baby?” he asks, his finger running down my slit and collecting the wetness there, placing it into his mouth and releasing it, tongue coming to swipe across his lip. he smiles when i nod my head slowly, moving back upward so that his body now rests on top of mine.
“you taste so good schatz.” he whispers against my lips, quick to reattach them. i quickly reciprocate, moving my lips against his own almost desperately, clutching onto any opportunity to feel him against me. and when his hands trail downward, hurriedly tugging his swimming shorts down, i moan against him, attempting to pull our bodies even closer. i feel him smile against my lips, pulling away only to pull his shorts fully off, letting them join the rest of clothing scattered around the room.
his dick springs free, hitting his lower abdomen as pre-cum lines the tip, proving that he needs this just as badly as i do. he takes my hand, wrapping it around his base and prompting me to stroke him a few times, his head falling backward when my thumb runs over his tip, moving down his length slowly.
“fuck baby…gonna make me cum just with your hands, like that, yeah.” his eyes fall shut, eyebrows furrowing as his mouth opens, low groans sounding from the back of his throat. he stops me after a few seconds, removing my hand and replacing it with his own, stroking himself a few times before climbing fully on top of me. though he doesn’t give in just yet, running his tip up and down my folds, studying my face intently and watching the way my lips part, breathy moans leaving them.
the torture that comes with waiting soon ends when i feel his tip line up with my entrance, sliding into me ever so slightly, pulling back out before i can fully process the pleasure.
“you gonna let me fuck you, mhm?” he mumbles, smiling in satisfaction when i quickly nod my head, willing to do practically anything for his dick to be inside of me. and that simple confirmation is all he needs to slide into me, my walls stretching out as he fills me up.
“oh my god!” i cry out, eyes squeezing shut as he bottoms out, his tip brushing against my g-spot. he moves backward, almost pulling out completely before snapping his hips, moving all the way back inside me in one swift motion, an almost inaudible grunt leaving his lips.
“so fucking tight, oh my god.” his breathing becomes heavier, chest rising up and down as he begins a fast pace, skipping the chance to build a steady rhythm and instead moving in and out of me quicker than usual, still somehow managing to thrust deeper into me with each movement. my mouth falls open in a silent scream, unable to make any sounds despite the screams that bubble in my throat, too lost in pleasure to be able to moan, let alone speak.
though when he angles his lips slightly differently, his tip doesn’t just brush against my g-spot - it hits it directly, drilling against it with each thrust. and that is all i need to finally make noise, a loud moan leaving my lips, followed by an almost indistinguishable ‘right there’.
“oh you like that?” tom studies my face, his own eyes dark and half lidded, memorising my reaction to the certain thrust of his hips, quickly able to repeat that same movement and hit my g-spot over and over as my back arches, hands clawing the sheets. somewhere in the midst of his thrusts he takes my thighs, fingers digging into the flesh roughly, maintaining a steady hold on them and hooking them around his wait, allowing him to drill even deeper into me. now i don’t attempt to hold back - my mouth lets out moans so loud they could probably pass as screams as i silently thank god that nobody else is here right now.
the pleasure that comes his dick alone, paired with the fast and deep thrusts that this new angle brings makes me go close to crazy, hands reaching upward to grab onto the few loose dreads that rest on his shoulder, pulling on them more harshly than i had intended to. tom doesn’t seem to mind though, instead he lets out a low groan, his thrusts only seeming to get faster.
“oh baby…” he breathes out, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as i feel him twitch inside of me. i pull on his dreads again, attempting to pull him closer to me, doing so with success as he moans against me in response, the low noises that he makes quickly muffled as he kisses the corner of my mouth. “keep doing that schatz, please…getting close.”
i study his face, watching as his mouth falls open, a quiet whine leaving his lips when i clench around him unconsciously, drawing him even deeper into me. his eyebrows are furrowed, eyes fluttering closed, quickly opening when i accidentally pull on his dreads just a little too tight. he never scolds me for it though, seeming to like the sensation as his head falls backward, small words of encouragement amidst his heavy breaths.
the familiar sensation in my stomach only becomes more noticeable with each thrust, getting closer and closer to releasing when he takes my legs, hoisting them over his shoulders. somehow his pace doesn’t falter, remaining so fast that the headboard slams against the wall rhythmically, practically guaranteeing a series of noise complaints in the next few hours. it doesn’t matter though, not to tom or me. the way his dick twitches inside of me, hips snapping back and forth almost desperately, i can tell that he is just as close as i am. and if my release wasn’t within arms reach just yet, then it won’t be far away anymore, my eyes squeezing shut when tom takes his pointer and middle finger, using them to rub fast circles on my clit.
“show me how good i make you feel.” he orders through heavy breaths, speeding up the motions of his fingers, the pleasure almost overwhelming as i struggle to even process what he is saying, only able to let incoherent whines pour from my lips, amidst attempts to mumble his name over and over.
“doing so well for me baby, so well.” he praises, placing sloppy kisses to my collarbone.
“gonna cum!” i manage to say, silently praying that tom will too, knowing that i am unable to hold on any longer, already overstimulated by the movements of his fingers, still not slowing down.
“i know baby, me too. c’mon, let go…cum for me.” he breathes out as i feel him twitch inside of me one last time. his permission is all i need to finally release the knot that had been building in my stomach, my mouth falling open in a silent scream as my hands rake down tom’s back. he winces slightly in pain, though it is soon cut off by a loud groan as he throws his head back, his hot cum coating my walls.
“oh my fucking god.” his voice is low, breaking slightly as it is cut off by a small whine, his eyebrows furrowing, hands grabbing firmly onto my hips. he fights the urge to close his eyes, watching me through half-lidded ones as my release continues to wash over me, my own vision blurred. he continues to move in and out of me at a steady pace, riding out our highs and fucking his cum deep into me, hips grinding against mine as he repeatedly bottoms out.
my eyes open slowly once i reach the end of my high, seemingly at the same time as tom. he remains inside of me, collapsing on top of me and running his fingers through my hair, brushing away the loose once that had gotten stuck to my face. his body shines with sweat, lining his skin and highlighting each muscle as they tense and release with each heavy breath, his lips remaining parted.
“you okay?” he asks after a few moments of silence, the room completely quiet besides from our rapid breathing. his lips place a few quick kisses into my hair, comforting me as he slowly slides out of me. i hiss slightly at the empty feeling, eyes closing as tom hushes me, mumbling a quick apology and kissing my lips quickly. he watches as a mix of our juices spill out of me, reaching to the nightstand into the box of tissues that sit there and gently wiping me. my body jolts in shock, still sensitive there.
“i’m sorry honey.” he kisses my inner thigh a few times, his free hand rubbing soft circles onto the skin, attempting to comfort me whilst he makes sure that i am cleaned up.
“you did so well schatz.” he smiles after placing the used tissues in the trash, quickly pulling on his underwear and handing me some fresh clothes. “c’mon, come here.”
he opens his arms out once i have finished changing, smiling softly as i climb onto the bed and into his embrace, placing a kiss to his chest when he quickly wraps his arms around me. the sun begins to set, its amber hues casting themselves across the sky, providing a perfect view from the large window opposite our bed. tom tightens his hold on me, kissing my forehead repeatedly as i place my leg on top of his own, resting my arm loosely across his torso.
i faintly register the sound of the apartment door opening, quiet conversation soon allowing me to distinguish the voices of bill and gustav, georg’s laughter following. tom taps my arm loosely, my head turning to face him as the guys’ footsteps near closer to the room.
“you’re sick, remember.” he winks, laughing quietly and placing the blankets over the both of us, rubbing my arm softly when the door slowly opens, bill’s head peering through the small gap. his eyes widen when he sees my expression which i had managed to change quickly - my eyes heavy, lips curved into a small frown, quiet coughs escaping from them.
“oh you poor thing, how are you feeling? did tom look after you? tom have you made sure-”
“i’ve taken great care of her, don’t worry.” a smug smirk rests on tom’s face, his hand reaching to squeeze my ass playfully under the covers - thankfully out of bill’s view. bill furrows his eyebrows, shaking his head and shooting me a sympathetic glance, returning his attention to tom. he laughs quietly beside me, pulling me even closer as my body is now practically on top of him.
“i took really good care of you, didn’t i baby?” tom asks, his eyes flickering between bill and i. my eyes widen, mouth opening to speak, though i decide on nodding my head weakly, realising that i have been quiet for far too long. bill shrugs his shoulders, accepting my small confirmation and closing the door behind him as he leaves. i hit tom’s arm, silently scolding him for almost blowing our cover, though he only laughs quietly.
I thought of a tom x reader loosely based on "Hungover you"
like him and reader being best friends and somewhere along the line they spend a night together, but decide to forget it for the sake of their friendship (maybe they were a little drunk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ who knows)
then many years later they're still friends but they realise that they really love each other
even if you don't write this i wanted to tell you i think your writing is amazing! don't feel pressured to make content, I'm sure all of your followers don't mind waiting for your fics because they are really amazing!
aa sorry for the long text! <3
IT’S YOU - T. KAULITZ
synopsis: they say feelings change with time, but yours couldn’t have stayed closer to the same. it has been three years since you hooked up with tom, and despite your promise to forget about it for the sake of your friendship, you can’t ignore the way you feel anymore.
content: smut (kinda) & fluff
a/n: thankyou soo much!! i put a christmas twist on this because i realised i haven’t made an xmas fic yet i hope that’s okay! pls be patient w me bc apparently i should spend every hour of every day writing fics according to some people… just to be clear this is a hobby and nothing more. i don’t get paid for this LMAOO sometimes i don’t want to write and that’s okay - most people are really understanding so thank you for that, but on a more positive note merry christmas i hope u all have a happy holidays!!!💗
the faint smell of gingerbread teases my senses, mind beyond overstimulated with the incomprehensible blur of conversations around me - the amount of alcohol in my system clearly not helping. every inch of the living room is pasted with the not so subtle reminder of the festive season: warm lights casting their glow across the walls, garlands decorated with small red and green baubles, though the most obvious sign sits in the corner of the room. adorned with baubles in every colour possible, with tinsel (quite messily) stretched across its dark green branches, multi-coloured lights twinkling dimly around it, reminding me why i love this time of year so much.
the chaos of the annual christmas party that had become tradition over the years never became something that i had gotten used to, the dull buzz in my stomach (admittedly from the alcohol too) never going away as i watch my surroundings, friends laughing obnoxiously loudly whilst their hands tear away the intricately decorated paper, revealing their presents.
“and this one is for you.” tom says, snapping me out of my daze as he reaches underneath the tree from where he sits beside me, returning with a small box in his hands. he passes it over to me, a proud smile on his face as i study the wrapping. a red bow placed messily on top, the wrapping paper creased at the sides, the tape used to hold it in place hanging off.
“did you wrap this?” i stifle a laugh, remembering how terrible my best friend is at anything remotely technical, not wanting to hurt his feelings.
“yeah, why?” he seems genuinely proud, and i decide to give him that sense of fulfilment, ignoring that a child probably could have done a better job.
“nothing, nothing. it’s great.” i return my eyes to the present, hands moving to tear away the paper. tom’s eyes remain glued onto me, excitedly awaiting my reaction. i open the box inside, revealing a gold necklace, a small locket in its centre. my mouth falls open, fingers carefully lifting the jewellery from its box, eyes studying it in awe before i turn my attention to tom.
“are you kidding me? it’s beautiful, oh my god!”
an even wider smile rests on his face at my reaction, his leg bobbing up and down nervously. he gestures to the locket as i turn my attention back to it, thumb clicking it open. tom and i. the picture in the centre shows tom and i, far younger, far more innocent than we are now. cheesy grins plastered on our faces, arms wrapped around each other’s shoulders as we look into the camera, wrapped up in our huge winter coats - standard for the weather in germany.
“i don’t even know what to say i- thank you.” i smile, reaching over and wrapping my arms around his frame. he seems taken aback, though soon returns the gesture, his arms resting on my upper back, hand patting it slowly.
“you’re welcome. i hope you like it.” he offers me a warm smile as we pull away, soon turning his eyes toward the rest of the room, watching as bill unwraps his present from georg.
hours have passed, and even if i tried, i don’t think i could come close to counting the amount of drinks i’ve had. i am beyond tipsy, swaying my head to the cheesy christmas songs that play from the tv whilst attempting to sing the lyrics - failing miserably as my voice comes out slurred and inaudible.
“you sound terrible.” tom’s voice, just as slurred as my own, causes me to stop my singing, turning to face him as he sits beside me, finishing off the remainder of whatever drink he has in his glass.
“thanks.” i mumble, grabbing the glass from his hands and shoving the last few drops down my throat, no longer flinching at its bitter taste. the room seems to become emptier, friends either leaving or finding a bedroom upstairs to sleep in, the darkness from outside reminding me that it is probably the early hours of the morning.
“they’re no fun.” i roll my eyes, pointing to the final few people walking out of the room tiredly, leaving tom and i alone. he hums in agreement as i reach forward, grabbing the half-empty bottle of vodka on the coffee table and pouring it into my mouth, taking a few large swigs. the faint burning in the back of my throat quickly subsides, prompting me to drink some more.
“lets play a game.” tom says from beside me, a loud giggle leaving my mouth at his sudden request.
“a game? what are we twelve?” i laugh, shaking my head and taking another drink, swirling the liquid that is still in the bottle around. “what game?”
“i don’t know, truth or dare?” he shrugs his shoulders, clearly not thinking straight. though i am in no position to judge him, the two of us too intoxicated to be able to think rationally.
“there’s only two of us though. that’s gonna be pretty fucking boring, don’t you think?”
he doesn’t respond, only shrugging his shoulders once again, prompting me to give in. i sit cross legged opposite him, signalling for him to go first.
“truth or dare?”
“hmmm….truth.” i mumble drunkenly, laughing to myself as my body sways to the side a little, almost falling completely off of the couch and onto the hard wood floor. he pauses, a mischievous smirk tugging at his lips as he appears to think as deeply as his intoxicated state allows him to, his eyebrows raising as he finally thinks of an idea.
“have you ever had a crush on anyone at this party?” he asks, leaning forward and resting his head in his hands, chuckling quietly to himself.
“bill, like four years ago.” i shrug nonchalantly, taking another swig from the bottle. if i were even remotely sober, i would have come up with some completely unbelievable lie, though the alcohol gives me the sudden confidence to confess, this a secret which i had silently vowed to take to the grave - until now.
“my brother? are you kidding?” his laughter is much louder this time, the room filled with it as he clutches his chest, eyes squeezing shut. at one point, i swear i see tears fall down his cheeks, my hand reaching to swat his chest, the effort pathetic as the alcohol appears to take away every ounce of physical strength.
we continue the game for another thirty minutes, the questions becoming more senseless as time passes, the dares even more abnormal as i sit with my small mini skirt off of my body and on the ground somewhere, tom now shirtless. the sober versions of ourselves would be watching in pure shame, though in the moment, this is the funniest thing we have ever done, drunken laughter pouring from our lips at every word that we say.
“your turn.” tom begins. “truth or dare?”
“dare.”
i expect him to think deeply about what to do, about ways to humiliate me in the worst way possible, taking advantage of the fact that he is in control, possessing the ability to make me do whatever his heart desires. but not only is he much quicker this time, his mind seemingly made up the second i had uttered the four letter word, his reply is one that i could never had been prepared for. though my drunken state brushes it off, unable to question, let alone refuse his demand.
“i dare you…to kiss me.”
i giggle quietly at his statement, widening my eyes in forged surprise and tucking my hair behind my ears, tom’s lips curved into a soft smirk as i slowly shuffle toward him. my legs wrap around his waist, arms wrapping loosely around his neck as his own rest around my waist. our faces are inches apart, small chuckles still leaving our lips as i situate myself comfortably, losing my balance and falling forward, my body collapsing onto his chest.
“whoops.” i mumble, bursting into laughter as tom does the same, trying to pick me back up as his hands place themselves onto my shoulders, pushing me upward so that i sit on his lap once again. though once i regain my balance, the small smile that rests on tom’s lips soon disappears, the laughter replaced by a heavy silence, thick with unexpected tension. his hands rest more firmly on my waist now, face seeming to get closer and closer to my own, so close that his breath fans onto my face, lips ghosting just below my nose.
his eyes look into mine, darkened and filled with lust, almost questioning whether he should make the move. the alcohol is still in charge, still the thing that fuels both tom’s and my own decision making, but behind the drunkenness, i see the real tom, and somewhere amidst the blur of alcohol and lust, i can tell that he is fighting with himself. though after a few seconds, the decision is made, seemingly with little debate as he pushes his lips onto mine harshly, taking my bottom lip between his teeth. the kiss is sloppy, messy, irrational, everything that it should be, fuelled by alcohol and unforeseen desire. but whether it is the bottle of vodka i had just drank talking, or the genuine need that only grows as each second passes, it feels right.
and tom’s actions show that he feels the same way. from our clothes being impatiently pulled off of our bodies, lips tangled in a heated mess, to his dick being inside me, something within me tells me that this should be happening, even if our drunken state is the cause.
“fuck…you feel so good.” he groans from above me, maintaining a steady pace, his words still slurred. sweat lines his body, starting at his forehead, his dreads resting on his shoulders, trailing down to his torso. and as i watch him move in and out of me, i take a second to admire his body - his skin, biceps, the way each muscle flexes slightly when he thrusts into me, my mind wondering how it had taken me this long to realise how hot he is. sure, i had known that he was attractive, his overly obsessive fans made that clear enough, but it had taken him being totally naked on top of me to realise that they have been right this entire time, and god, i want nothing more than this moment to last forever.
“i’m getting close.” he mumbles from above me, his head moving to rest in the crook of my neck, placing rough kisses there as his tongue moves across the skin in place of his mouth. when his dick begins to twitch inside of me, i soon realise that it can’t last forever, that in a few minutes, or when the alcohol wares off, we will have to go back to normal, to act like he didn’t just fuck me - his best friend of over ten years.
his head returns from my shoulder, a loud groan escaping his lips as i feel him shoot his cum inside of me, his eyes squeezing shut, lips slightly parted as he curses under his breath. and it doesn’t take long for my own release to follow, the loud moan that sounds from the back of my throat muffled by tom’s lips as he presses them onto my own, mumbling a quick ‘shhh’ against me. he rides out our highs, pulling out after a minute and collapsing on top of me, tired and breathless. we lay in silence, tom occasionally pressing quick kisses onto my shoulder, our bodies completely spent.
despite how little we speak about it, that night stays clear in my memory, able to remember it like it was yesterday, even though today marks three years since we did something that should have changed our friendship forever. sure, it was awkward for a little while after, but after the mutual decision to put it behind us ‘for the sake of our friendship’, blaming it purely on the alcohol, we had moved on, maintaining our close bond that had existed since we were kids. it seemed to special to ruin, too important to destroy for the sake of the possibility of falling in love, knowing that it would be too risky to pursue something, the small yet very real chance that it wouldn’t work out holding the ability to ruin our friendship forever.
but god, i would be stupid to deny the way my heart tugs at its strings whenever i see him, whenever i hug him in a way that is strictly platonic, wondering if somewhere he feels the same way as i do.
“you okay?” a voice snaps me out of my train of thought, my head turning to its source as tom’s brown eyes look into my own, a small smile on his face. i quickly nod my head, turning away and focusing on gustav as he takes a present from under the tree, flashing me a smile once he realises that it is from me.
tom doesn’t give in though, his voice interrupting my own from beside me as i am in the process of listening to gustav, a smile on his face whilst he thanks me for his gift.
“you sure?” tom asks, his voice low and uncertain, expression bordering confused when i forge a smile, reassuring him that i am fine, knowing that i am far from it, the reminder that three years ago things were so different still acting as a raw wound, despite how easily tom had seemed to get over it.
“no you’re not. come on.” he takes my hand, guiding me out of the room as i turn around, hoping that nobody had noticed, sighing in relief when i realise that they are all immersed in their own conversations. tom guides me into the kitchen, moving me so that my body is against the counter, his own in front of me, stopping me from leaving.
“what are you doing? the party is out there, bill was about to open the gift i got for him.” i furrow my eyebrows, attempting to leave the kitchen, though tom’s hand is quick to place itself on my wrist gently, pulling me back to rest against the counter.
“i can tell when you’re not okay. something is bothering you. what’s wrong?” his voice is much more serious this time, no longer holding that playful tone that it had before.
i sigh, breaking eye contact and staring at the ground, fingers reaching to play with the material of my christmas sweater, trying anything to distract myself from the tears that begin to pool at my waterline. i know that i can’t escape from this now, becoming aware that even if i attempt to lie, tom will see right through it.
“come on, you can talk to me you know? i’m your best friend-”
“that’s the fucking problem.” i mumble, silently cursing myself the second the words leave my mouth, praying that they were quiet enough for tom to not understand them. though when his eyebrows furrow, head tilting to the side, i quickly realise that he got every word. his mouth opens to speak, only for a few seconds as he closes it again, mind working faster than it ever has before, working to think of a response.
“what do you mean?” he asks eventually, my eyes meeting his own. his gaze softens when he registers the tears that fall down my cheeks. he reaches forward, his arms trying to wrap around my frame and pull me into a hug, though i refuse his embrace, not able to handle the emotional torture of another hug, knowing that it will never mean anything more than means of comfort, rather than an act of affection out of love. his eyebrows furrow in confusion when i push him away gently, his tongue moving outward to swipe against his lip ring, fingers adjusting the bandana that adorns his jet black braids - the one thing that is different about him since that day.
“why do you act like nothing happened?” i ask, my voice low and weak, eyes finally finding the courage to meet his own. he stays silent, knowing exactly what i am talking about without even mentioning it directly. because no matter how much we act like it never happened, i know that both of us will never be able to forget it, even if he acts like he has. i take his silence as i sign to continue, taking the opportunity to get this off of my chest. “you act like that night never happened, and it fucking infuriates me. you speak to me, you look at me, you hug me, but it’s not the same anymore. you can try and act like you don’t remember it, but i fucking can’t. i can’t sit back anymore and act normal around you knowing that we did it. and then you stand here and call me your fucking friend. it kills me that you don’t even care, that it means nothing at all to you-”
he cuts me off, though not with his voice. not with a quick remark, not with a reminder that we are just friends, that we can never be anything more; but with his lips, pressing them to my own. they are soft, just as i had remembered them, the coldness of his lip ring just as addictive as it had been the first time. and though it only lasts a few seconds before he pulls away, it still ignites that spark within me that had been lifeless since we had promised to forget about what had happened. his forehead rests against mine, hands pulling my body against his own as he wraps his arms around my waist.
“who said that i don’t care about what happened, hm?” his face remains inches away from mine, his hands reaching upward to wipe the tears that rest on my cheeks. he doesn’t pull back, instead pressing my body against his once again. “i think about it, all the time. and every single time, i think about what could have happened if we didn’t push it aside, if we actually acted on it. but then i remind myself that you didn’t want that, and i can’t lose you. so i just decided to not speak about it. but don’t think for a second that i forgot.”
i stay silent, unsure of what to say, trying to fathom what his confession truly means. is he saying that he feels the same way, or was the kiss out of pity, one to stop the tears that continue to fall?
“what are you saying?” i whisper, pursing my lips and looking at the floor, breaking eye contact once again. though it is only short lived, my eyes soon returning to look at his own as he lifts my face up, his hands now resting on either side of it.
“i’m saying that i don’t want to be just your best friend anymore. i don’t think my heart can handle that.”
my eyes widen, mouth opening to speak, finding myself at a loss for words as no sound escapes. once again, tom’s actions seem to speak louder than any words would have been able to, his arms scooping me up as he kisses me once again. it is gentler this time, lacking the lust behind that it had the first time we had kissed. it holds much more meaning behind it than just drunken desire. this time, it carries the silent promise of every single thing that i have ever wanted since that night - love.
“you know…i wasn’t totally shitfaced when i asked you to kiss me that night.” he says once he pulls away, a playful smile now tugging on his lips. i shake my head, pulling him by his shirt and kissing him once again. he smiles into the kiss, quickly reciprocating as he moves his lips against my own.
“oh my god.”
i quickly push tom away, his lips pink and swollen as he turns around, my eyes widening once i see bill standing in the doorway of the kitchen with some empty plates in either hand. his mouth is wide open, body standing completely still in shock.
“i’ll just…leave these here.” he quickly says, rushing toward the sink and practically throwing the plates in there, shooting me a quick glance before leaving.
i look upward at tom, who seems to be unfazed by the situation, his thumb reaching upward to swipe at the lipgloss that had stained his lips. he meets my gaze, shrugging his shoulders and wrapping his arm around me, pulling my body to rest against his own, our chests together.
“at least we don’t have to figure out a way to tell everybody else. bill would have told them all by now.”
i saw ur last post, some people request the same concept to multiple writers because usually they’re request goes unanswered or deleted. You do post non frequently so of course someone is gonna request to a different writer the same concept they requested to your account. It’s really not a big deal for you to make a post about it when you really should be posting more fan-fics since you’re a “writer” SMH.
HELPPPPPPP “you should be posting more fan fics” i’m so sorry that this is such an inconvenience that i have this crazy thing called a life! wild that i don’t spend every waking minute writing fan fictions on tumblr and i have an actual social life 🔥🔥🔥 if u can’t relate to that i’m sorry but don’t project ur addiction to technology onto me - maybe go outside into the REAL WORLD (which isn’t filled with fan fictions about people that do not and will not ever know that u exist!)
and please take off the anonymous user cause it’s SOOOO funny that ur acting bold but u won’t show ur username - if u want to act like that then don’t hide behind a fucking anonymous tag 😭
if ur gonna send multiple messages at least try to be more discreet in the future - but here’s the attention ur craving!!
Requesting one concept from multiple writers is more about having higher chances of the request getting done. Tumblr is almost dead and most request go unanswered (which is completely fine)
whoever said this clearly isn’t a writer. it isn’t about ‘higher chance’ - it’s about having zero patience to actually wait for ur request to be done by one writer. but like i said for you to be saying this you clearly don’t write yourself, and haven’t spent multiple hours writing something, just to find out it’s already been written (so it’s a complete waste of my time - there is no point in having the same imagine posted multiple times if like you said tumblr is ‘dead’ because it’s likely that it’s the only recent imagine for at least a few days) so it’s obvious you don’t understand.
synopsis: after a stressful week at work, tom notices that you aren’t yourself. to help you loosen up, he decides to take care of you and give you even more princess treatment than usual, setting up a self-care night when you come home more stressed than usual.
content: fluff
a/n: tkaulitzlvr actually posting an imagine can u believe it😱😱😱 this was requested a while ago, but it lost the poll i put up a few weeks ago and since then it’s been in my inbox pretty often, so here u go! this is my first time writing since i last posted so i’m sorry if this is shitty😭
“another tough day schatz?” his voice is soft, bordering almost sympathetic as he runs his hands through my hair, arms wrapped securely around my upper back, staying that way from the second i had melted into them, doing so as soon as my tired feet trudged their way through the front door. this had become habitual over the past couple weeks, my job becoming particularly demanding with the annual roll around of christmas, my already packed schedule more hectic than ever, my happiness the cost of the overwhelming chaos that festivities inevitably brought along - the customers seeming to pour in faster than i could comprehend. though today, work had been almost too stressful, leaving me a lethargic mess, unable to do anything besides wrap my arms loosely around tom’s frame as he greets me with soft kisses, attempting to ease the stress that weights heavily on my shoulders, even if it is just a little bit.
“mhm.” i mumble, burying my head further into his chest, sighing loudly and allowing my eyes to flutter closed, already feeling at ease from the simple remedy of his touch.
he hums sympathetically in response, tightening the grip of his arms around my back, his lips pressing onto my forehead as a comfortable silence envelops us. his hands trail upward, moving tentatively under my thick jumper, the warmth of the knitted material replaced with the soft touch of his fingers as the pads trail across the skin of my back, tracing random patterns and allowing me to drown everything else out of my surroundings, tuning into only on the movements of his fingertips.
after a few minutes spent wrapped in his arms, he slowly moves away, though any doubts of him ending the tender moment are soon put to bed when his hands move upward, cupping my face in his palms and moving it closer. his lips are placed onto mine, their touch so gentle, so soft that my heart tugs at its strings, the stress that had weighed me down all week seeming to melt away. he pulls away every few seconds, tugging my bottom lip between his teeth, that same cocky smile on his face, though it doesn’t last long as he closes the gap between us once again. this time, his arms wrap around my waist, pulling my body flush against his as he begins to sway side to side. his fingers dig into the flesh of my hips, chuckling into the kiss when i jump slightly.
“i love you.” he mumbles against my lips when he finally pulls away, breathless and flustered, his cheeks a light shade of red as his now swollen lips mirror my own. he doesn’t wait for my response, a slight smile gracing his expression as he opens his mouth to continue. “how about i help you relax? we can shower and then put on one of your favourite movies, i’ll even order takeout. how does that sound schatz?”
when my lips curve into a soft smile he already knows the answer, moving closer once again and kissing my cheek. his hands find their way to my heavy winter coat, reaching to pull it off of my frame as i look upward at him in confusion.
“you’re exhausted honey. let me do this for you, okay?”
i don’t object, nodding my head silently and standing still as he gently removes my arms from the sleeves, walking away momentarily to hang the coat with the rest of the clothes beside the front door. he comes up behind me, quickly lifting me upward into his arms before i can object.
“what are you doing?” i giggle, patting his back whilst small chuckles escape my lips, legs flailing around as his arms remain tightly around my waist. he places me gently on the couch, flashing me a soft smile before bending down in front of me. i giggle in disbelief when he reaches for my boots, slowly undoing the buckle.
“baby i’m tired not incapable. you don’t have to take my shoes off for me.” i shake my head slowly, laughing quietly to myself as he looks up, making eye contact with me.
“but i want to. let me take care of you.” his voice is slow, though the movements of his hands as they remove my shoes are even slower, bordering too careful, tugging the zippers on each foot downward gently. one hand moves to the heel, the other placing itself at the front of my shoe as he pulls it off, setting it on the floor and moving to my other shoe, until they are both off of my sore feet.
he clears his throat, moving his body upward so that it hovers above my own. he kisses my lips briefly, smiling into it and pecking them a few more times. “let’s go shower yeah?”
he scoops me into his arms, my legs instinctively wrapping around his torso as i bury my head into his neck, the familiar scent of vanilla and cigarettes calming my mind. his fingers tap against my thighs in a random pattern, arms hoisting me further upward whenever i would slip out of his embrace. my eyes only open when i feel my position change, realising that tom has set me down on the bathroom counter, the marble cold against my skin despite the denim that covers my lower half. he mutters a quick ‘i’ll be right back’, before disappearing out of the bathroom, leaving me alone momentarily. the silence is peaceful - a clear contrast from the chaos i had been unwillingly part of all day. it is strange for things to be so quiet, without the annoying and far too frequent complains of a customer, or the constant sound of christmas music blasting around the store. but it is nice, and my entire body relaxes at the lack of noise until tom reappears, holding some fresh pyjamas, a random array of unlit candles placed on top of them.
he places them next to me, turning away and messing with the shower until hot water begins to pour from it. he reaches into his pocket, pulling out a lighter and setting the candles upright. his fingers flick the light switch off, small orange flames casting their brightness around the now dim bathroom. his eyes meet mine, gaze staying locked on mine as he walks over, his fingers finding their way to the hem of my jumper.
“can i take this off schatz?” he asks, smiling weakly when i nod my head. he lifts the material upward slowly, dropping it to the floor and studying my upper body. he moves his attention to my bra, looking into my eyes once again, waiting for that permission he had sought moments ago. i mutter a quiet ‘yes’, his fingers pulling the clasps undone. knowing better than to make the moment sexual, his gaze lingers only briefly as he appears to snap out of it, mumbling a quick ‘so beautiful’ before removing my jeans, letting them pool at my feet. i stand up, removing my panties myself whilst he turns to his own clothing.
“wait.” i say, his head turning to face me. he stops his movements when he is just about to remove his shirt, watching as my hands move his own away, my fingers clasping around the soft material as i lift it over his head, revealing his upper body, adorned with rigid muscle and soft skin, something which still makes my stomach swarm with butterflies - no matter how many times my eyes land on the sight. he grins softly, planting a sweet kiss in my hair before pulling his own jeans down, his boxers quickly following.
i enter the shower, the warm water quickly easing the tension that had habituated around my body, my eyes shutting at the satisfaction. i feel tom’s presence behind me, his arms wrapping around my waist slowly. his head dips just below my ear, lips ghosting over the skin until they eventually make contact, placing slow and messy kisses there, my head falling backward as i make no attempt to stop him.
“you okay baby?” he whispers lowly against me, pulling his head out of my shoulder, turning my body around so that i am now facing him, his frame considerably taller than my own, his head looking downward whilst my own neck bends upward to look into his eyes.
“mhm.” i offer him a weak smile, watching as he reaches behind me, grabbing the shampoo from the small shelf.
his hand places itself on my shoulder, applying a little pressure. “turn around schatz.” he whispers, twisting my body so that my back now faces him. i take a guess at what he is doing, my prediction confirmed as correct when i hear him open the bottle from behind me, squeezing some shampoo into his hands. he lathers it up for a few seconds before his fingers thread into my wet hair, massaging the suds deep into my scalp. i sigh in relief, head falling backward slightly at the feeling. his fingers move deeper, leaving no part untouched, the bubbles now coating my entire head. once satisfied, he reaches for the shower head, testing the temperature before moving it so that the water falls directly onto my hair.
“close your eyes honey.” he says, moving the stream of water as the suds run down the front of my face. his hands still run through my hair, taking real care to make sure that the shampoo is completely washed out. he grabs the conditioner, rubbing it softly on the ends of my hair, rinsing the remainder under the water.
he lathers some soap in his hands whilst my conditioner soaks in, turning my body around so that i am facing him once again. he starts at my shoulders, covering them in the soapy suds, then trailing down to my arms, hands, stomach, waist, back. a playful smile tugs at his lips when he reaches my breasts, touching them a little - in fact way more than he needed to. his hands cup them firmly, thumbs swirling over my nipples as he looks into my eyes. i shake my head playfully, though i don’t have it in me to tell him to stop, allowing his hands to work on my breasts.
“just making sure they’re clean.” he confirms, letting a soft laugh escape from his lips. his hands detach from them after a few minutes, moving to rest on my ass. though when his face nears my own, i soon realise that this is no longer about ‘making sure that i am clean.’ he walks backward slightly until our bodies are submerged under the stream of water, pressing his lips to my own. the kiss is different this time. it is firmer, rougher, playing dangerously on the line between loving and lustful. his tongue slips into my mouth, hands kneading my ass as he pushes his body further into mine, the feeling of something hard between my thighs snapping me out of the moment.
i look downward, stifling a laugh once i pick up on tom’s problem. “and here i was thinking this shower was for you to take care of me.” i sigh, shaking my head and laughing quietly.
“you’re naked in front of me. i can’t help it baby, i swear.” he jokes, his hands resting on my lower back as he pecks my lips lovingly a few times. “don’t worry, we don’t have to do anything. this is your night, and i’m gonna take care of you, just like i said i would.”
my heart warms at his words, arms reaching to wrap around his torso as i pull him into a hug. he is taken aback, but quickly hugs back, his hands resting on my back as his thumbs run up and down it.
“i love you.” i mumble, face flush against his chest.
“i love you more schatz, always.” he replies, resting his chin on my head, the room now silent besides from the sound of water pouring from the shower head. “c’mon let’s finish up then you can pick a movie, whatever you like.”
i nod my head, about to wash the conditioner on my hair out myself, though tom beats me to it, running the hot water through my hair until it is completely clean. he steps out first, reaching his hand out for me to take, grabbing a towel as i exit the shower. he starts with my hair, squeezing the excess water out of it, before moving the towel down my body, removing the small droplets that rest on my skin. the time he spends focusing on himself is next to nothing - he briefly drew himself off and slips on some grey sweatpants, running a towel on his braids for a few seconds.
“lift your arms up.” he says, grabbing the pyjamas that he had brought in earlier, placing the oversized t-shirt (he knew instinctively to pick one of his out - remembering that i would much rather wear his clothes than my own) over my frame, tugging the baggy sweatpants up and over my legs.
i mutter a quick ‘thank you’, exiting the bathroom and flopping onto the bed, body sinking into the fresh sheets. tom follows a few seconds later, chuckling at my state when he enters the bedroom. he walks over slowly, picking me up and climbing under the covers, only letting me go to place my body on top of his own, legs intertwined, my chest flat against his own. he reaches for the remote that sits on our bedside table, handing it over to me.
“it’s all yours.” he smiles, watching as i gladly take it, shifting my position so that i can see the large tv directly opposite our bed. though this subtle change clearly separates the distance between tom and i too much, his arms reaching to wrap tightly around my waist, my own resting on his torso, head snuggling into his chest as i flick the tv on, the screen quickly lighting up.
“thank you for taking care of me.” i mumble against him, snuggling further into his embrace. i feel him smile against me, hand giving my waist a soft squeeze.
“of course. it’s my job baby, you know i’d do it a thousand times over.” he places a kiss into my hair, letting his lips linger for a few seconds. “all i want is for you to be happy. you know i’ll do anything to make sure that you are, right?”
i nod weakly, eyes landing on the movie that i want to watch, knowing that tom won’t be as thrilled as i am. “does that include watching the notebook?” i peer upwards at him, studying the way his face falls momentarily, a loud groan escaping his lips, knowing just how much he completely despises this movie.
“now that crosses the line.” he jokes, a playful smile now on his face. “you really sure you want to watch this? out of every movie?” he knows that attempting to change my mind is pointless, though any small chance of getting out of this is something that he will take. but when i nod my head slowly, he realises that it is no use.
“i’m just kidding. anything you want schatz. it’s your night.”
i kiss his cheek repeatedly amidst mumbling rushed and almost inaudible ‘thankyou’s, the smile on his face only growing wider and wider as he places his hand on my back, shaking his head once i return to how i had been sat before, my head resting on his chest. the movie begins to play, tom’s thumb rubbing soft circles on my skin, the feeling of his eyes burning into me providing a clear distraction.
“stop staring.” i whisper, hitting his chest lightly. “watch the movie tom.”
“sorry.” he mumbles, returning his attention to the screen, though i sense his gaze on me throughout, not having the energy or heart to stop him, instead letting him get away with the not so subtle glances that he sends my way, deciding to give him the false hope that he is being discreet.
eventually, his breathing becomes slower and deeper, body no longer shifting as it had done for the past thirty minutes. i turn around, seeing his eyes closed, mouth slightly parted with quiet snores escaping from it as his chest moves up and down, arms still holding me tightly in their embrace. i turn the tv off, pulling the covers over both of us and placing my leg over his, fingers tracing random shapes onto his chest as i feel my own eyes becoming heavy. just as i am about to fall into a slumber, tom begins to stir in his sleep, bringing my body even closer so that it now rests on top of his own. his eyes remain closed, still on the verge of sleep as his mouth opens slowly, voice low and groggy. “i love you schatz, goodnight.”
could you do one where y/n's boyfriend cheats on her and tom is there to help? can be angst, fluff, or smut
BETTER THAN HIM - T. KAULITZ
synopsis: after your boyfriend cheats on you, you find yourself dialling tom’s number, having nobody else to turn to. despite the two of you not being on great terms after ending things almost a year ago, he cares for you without second thought, though not in the way you had first expected.
content: fluff & smut
a/n: this won the poll that i put up by a veryyy large margin, so here u go!! some people did ask for the shower fluff in my inbox, so don’t worry i will be posting that next for the people that voted for it!! hope u enjoy, so sorry for not posting in a while!💗
tears cascade down my soft cheeks, already a deep shade of red from the december breeze, though the harshness of its bite is nothing compared to the sadness which habituates deep within my stomach, the sinking feeling not easing even when i exit the house of my - now ex - boyfriend, the task seeming to take centuries as i sought to escape the second i laid eyes on the scene in front of me. his hands all over her, body hovering above her own, soft pants leaving his lips, her own attacking his neck feverishly - the entire scene replays in my mind, though despite the unmistakable truth of it all, i still fail to process any of it - from the incoherent shouting that i had thrown his way, to his rushed attempts to redress himself and provide some sort of explanation, muttering broken promises of ‘it’s not what it looks like’ and ‘i love you’s, to my shaken legs carrying myself to my car which is parked just outside of his house - leading me to the present.
and the clearly shaken state the situation has put me in is evident, only seeming to drive me out of control as my trembling hands move from the wheel where they had been resting, or more so clutching onto - so much that my knuckles had turned a faint shade of white. my slender fingers dig into my pocket, tears still staining my face with a painfully soul-crushing reminder of the situation, bloodshot eyes tinted with a glossy blanket, restricting my vision as i press the small button on the side, the screen lighting up in front of me. body moving far ahead of my mind, miles in front of any time that could buy myself a chance to think rationally, my fingers tap hurriedly against the screen, pressing the keypad without second thought, dialling the one number i swore i would never call again. my thumb touches the green button in the corner, hand bringing the phone up to my ear, the rhythmic beeping reminding me that it is far too late to go back now. after a few painful seconds, the beeping stops, replaced with a familiar voice on the other end, its tone bringing me both comfort and pain as thousands of memories soon flood through my mind.
“hello?”
his voice is soft, just as i had remembered it, laced with expected confusion, the way we had ended things certainly not warranting a random call almost a year after we had parted ways, especially when we had gone months without any contact.
“tom? i- are you busy? do you think i could come over? i’m so sorry…i just-” my speech is incoherent, interrupted every few seconds as i choke on my tears, sudden heavy breaths making it even more difficult to understand what i am saying.
“woah woah woah, slow down. you want to come over?” somehow he understands my request through my loud sobs, evident bewilderment in his tone as he stops, silence taking over the line as i swallow harshly before speaking.
“i’m sorry for calling you like this. i just- i didn’t know who else to speak to. jesus christ, im a mess.” i mumble, head falling backward to rest against the seat, eyes squeezing shut as i begin to regret dialling his number in the first place. though he isn’t as cold as i had imagined, his voice laced with concern more than anything, seemingly worried about me despite his total lack of obligation to have even picked up the phone.
he pauses, the line going temporarily quiet, the awkward silence soon destroyed as he lets out a heavy sigh before clearing his throat. “i’m at bill’s place. i’ll drive home now, i won’t be long.” his speech is followed by the sound of a car door slamming shut, the faint hum of an engine sounding throughout the phone.
my eyes widen at his quick acceptance, expecting to be shut down as soon as i had called. he owes me nothing, having every right to decline my call and block my number, yet he seems to care, willing to put whatever he has going on aside, the realisation of this temporarily curing the sadness taking over my mind.
“thank you, tom. i really appreciate it.” my speech is still slurred from the tears which fail to slow, eyes still bloodshot and body shaken, making it harder to show my genuine appreciation, though his next words soon take away that worry, my heart tugging at its strings.
“i’ll see you soon. drive safe, okay?”
the line cuts off as i bring my phone away from my ear, letting it rest in my lap. my fingers rush to wipe the tears away from my cheeks, the task totally pointless as they continue to fall, my anger somehow unable to wither despite tom’s quick attempt to be there for me. i turn the keys into the ignition, the engine soon starting as i pull out onto the road, taking one final glance at the house beside me, wanting nothing more to erase its existence from my memory. the drive to tom’s place is quick, my mind able to direct me to the familiar house without any real thought, the directions seemingly imprinted in my mind as it soon comes into view.
his car is already parked in his driveway, signalling that he was serious when he had said he was leaving bill’s place right away. i hesitantly pull up outside, leaving the car and locking it behind me, walking toward his front door as i had countless times. only now it feels different, because i can’t expect to be greeted with open arms, to be showered with kisses - all that can be guaranteed is tom’s presence, the nature of it yet to be discovered, though something tells me that he won’t be as warm as i am hoping. my hand reaches upward, knocking against the front door a few times, before stepping backward and waiting silently, quiet sniffles leaving my lips as i have failed to calm my sobs.
the door opens slowly after a few seconds, tom’s mouth falling open once he processes my state, the momentary harsh gaze quickly being replaced with one of concern as his entire expression softens. silence indulges the both of us, unsure of who should speak first, and what to even say. how do you welcome your ex-girlfriend into your home after she calls you without any explanation after almost a year? and on my end, how the fuck do i even begin to explain why i am here?
his presence alone is enough to bring more emotion than i had already experienced, my eyes watering once again, breathing speeding up as the tears fall at a much faster pace, gaze falling to the ground as i try to prevent tom from seeing me like this. though my attempt is unsuccessful, tom quick to react. and despite the abnormality of the situation, nothing can prepare me for his next move, me being here seeming totally normal in comparison for his bold action. his arms wrap securely around my frame, one hand moving upward tentatively to run through my hair.
my body tenses up, unsure of how to react to his sudden affection, though it doesn’t take long for me to melt into his embrace, arms wrapping around his back, head falling further into his chest as his chin rests on top of it.
“shhh, it’s okay. i’m here, i’ve got you.” he whispers, thumb running up and down my lower back comfortingly, doing so until my sniffles begin to soften, small hiccups soon diminishing into calm breaths. it is when he registers my calm state that he pulls back, eyes soft and filled with concern as he gestures toward the inside of his house, quickly making me aware that we are still standing on his porch.
“c’mon, let’s go inside. you must be freezing.”
i nod weakly in response, following him inside the house as he closes the door behind me. everything is as it was before i had left. the place is slightly messy, random guitars dotted around the living room, cushions messily placed on the couches, his shoes scattered around the doorway. a small smile creeps upon my lips at the familiarity, finding comfort in witnessing his small habits, realising that little had changed.
“you want a drink, some water or anything?”
his voice snaps me out of my train of thought, my eyes meeting his gaze as he looks at me from the other side of the living room, just about to enter the kitchen that joins onto it.
“i’m good, thanks.” i decline, standing awkwardly in the doorway, unsure of what to say, hating that things are so tense between us. he nods briefly, hand reaching out to gesture toward the couch as he walks over to it, sinking into the cushions. “come on, sit.”
i hesitantly walk over, taking a seat beside him, hands reaching upward to wipe the tears that still roll down my cheeks, the room silent beside from my small sobs.
“lets talk.” he begins, turning to face me and shuffling slightly closer, reducing the large gap between us. “what’s wrong?”
“i walked in on my boyfriend fucking someone else.” i mutter bluntly, the verbal confirmation on what i had saw only making the realisation harder to swallow, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth. i purse my lips, finally making eye contact with tom. his look of concern is quickly replaced by one unmistakable for anything else but pure anger - jaw clenched, eyes dark and heavy as they stare at the ground, his hands locked together firmly.
“you had a boyfriend?” his voice is low, almost frightening as jealousy edges his question, clearly bothered by the fact that i had been with someone else.
“yeah, why?” i respond, eyebrows furrowing at his question, intending for my own response to come out less harshly, though given the circumstances, he doesn’t seem mad at my own cold tone.
“nothing i just- didn’t think you would’ve moved on already.” his confession surprises me, a sinking feeling forming in my stomach as i begin to feel somewhat guilty, not expecting him to care that i had found someone else, the breakup seemingly still a fresh wound for him.
i stay quiet, unsure of how to respond, the silence soon replaced by tom’s voice as he speaks again, sensing the discomfort that his statement had brought. “i’m sorry he did that to you. he didn’t deserve you anyways.”
i tear my eyes away from his own, feeling my lip quivering, cheeks turning a light shade of red as i shake my head, any mention of him still a sensitive subject. my body shakes silently as i sob, eyes fixed on the ground as i wish that it would swallow me up, my leg bobbing up and down anxiously. through my cries, my ears pick up on the sound of tom getting up, my body soon being lifted up and placed into his lap, his arms taking my legs and wrapping them firmly around his waist. my tears soak into his baggy t-shirt - not that he seems to mind, his focus is on comforting me in any way possible. his hands soothingly rub up and down my back, lips placing quick kisses into my hair as he mumbles words of consolation.
after a few minutes, his pointer finger moves under my chin, lifting it upward, leaving our faces now inches apart. his gaze is soft, gentle and almost comforting in itself, the familiarity of his dark brown eyes staring into mine acting as some form of consolation, though the majority comes from his steady embrace, the strength of it failing to diminish as he keeps me in his arms, only his face seems to be moving closer and closer to my own.
he pauses only when his lips are ghosting over my own, the coldness of his small metal piercing brushing over the skin briefly. i can sense the visible hesitation, his mouth parted slightly, shallow breaths escaping it as he remains so close that i can feel him, every emotion, every thought that runs through his mind, i can gauge it myself.
though his uncertainty is only short lived, soon replaced with actions nothing short of purposeful, with every ounce of intent behind them, his lips connecting with mine in a soft kiss. he is gentle, taking my bottom lip in his mouth carefully, the kiss trailing dangerously on the line between passionate and heated, never crossing that line as he pulls back, resting his forehead against my own.
“can i tell you something?” he mutters against my lips, voice just above a whisper. and when i don’t respond, he pecks my lips once more before continuing.
“you don’t know how much it hurts me that some other guy got to have you to himself. but it breaks my fucking heart to know that he did this to you.” he pauses, eyes falling shut for a few seconds as he shakes his head, hands finding their way to my face, resting softly on either side. “i hate that he hurt you. drives me fucking crazy.”
tears line my eyes at his confession, whether it be from the vulnerability that my emotions bring, or the power that his words hold. his thumbs reach to wipe the tears as they fall, lips moving to kiss a few away, the soft touch of his kiss soothing me in the most beautiful way possible. though nothing comforts me more than his next words, eyes widening as soon as he utters them.
“i still love you.”
he seems surprised at his own confession, mouth parting slightly as he attempts to figure out my reaction, silently praying that i will confess the same thing. though when i stay silent, he soon rushes to fix his words, eager to apologise for them, mistaking my silence for unreciprocated love.
“fuck i’m sorry- i shouldn’t have-”
his rushed apology is quickly cut off by my lips pressing against his own, silencing the unnecessary speech before he can continue. the kiss is quickly reciprocated as he attempts to deepen it, pressing his lips onto mine much harsher than before, silently signalling towards something more than just an innocent kiss.
“i love you too.” i mutter against him, this enough for him to pull away, a small smile tugging on his lips.
his eyes, deep and enticing, flicker continuously between mine and my lips, desire soon taking over as i watch them turn from loving to lustful, not having time to comprehend this change as he forces his lips onto mine one again. the kiss is filled with desperation, fast and eager, different from the one we shared earlier. he craves more - and so do i. this silent agreement is all he needs to deepen the kiss, placing one hand on the back of my head, using it to pull me even closer to him.
his hands latch onto my waist, pulling himself into me, our actions a mirror to our hunger for each other as our mouths become intertwined, our bodies linked and our hearts aching for more. longing to feel him even closer than i already am, i latch onto the soft material of his t-shirt, pulling it past his chest and over his head, momentarily breaking the kiss to throw it carelessly onto the floor beneath us, my self-control disappearing with it as my eyes momentarily glance down his chest, hands following my gaze as they travel down the soft skin.
he hovers over me, one hand in my hair as he kisses me deeply, the other propping himself up, careful not to hurt me. the way he touches me, the way each moment of contact electrifies each nerve, intensifying the feeling and making me feel more alive than ever only heightens my desperation, hands pulling him downward so we are pressed together, nothing but the thick air between us. our clothing acts as a barrier, only slowing the process as i become more and more needy, tom reciprocating my neediness as he pulls my hoodie over my head, briefly breaking the kiss before reconnecting my lips with his, raking my shorts and panties down in one swift motion, his own underwear soon following.
without warning, he flips us over, his back resting against the couch as he sits down, placing me on top of him and beginning to kiss my collarbone, my legs instinctively wrapping around his torso as i begin to slowly rock against him.
“you’re so beautiful baby." he mutters against my skin, kissing hungrily wherever his lips can access, the feeling temporarily taking away the ability to process his words, breathy moans leaving my lips as i savour the feeling of his mouth working against me.
he pulls away momentarily, grabbing my hips and lifting them over him, gazing into my eyes, soon picking up on the worry that takes over my expression.
"don't worry, just ride." he whispers, his forehead against mine. the feeling of his skin touching mine, eyes gazing into my own is enough reassurance, my head nodding in response, tom slowly lowering me downwards as i am filled up almost instantly, the feeling causing my breath to hitch, a choked moan escaping from his parted lips. pain surges through me, my body not used to his size, having not been intimate with him for so long. he senses this quickly, stopping and caressing my cheek whilst he is halfway inside me.
"are you okay?" he asks against my lips, one hand placed securely on my lower back as he slowly moves it up and down in an attempt to comfort me. "we can stop if you want to, just say the word schatz."
the thought of ruining this moment seems completely foreign to me, my head instantly shaking in response. i place a quick kiss on his lips in an attempt to reassure him, hands moving flat against his chest to steady myself.
“i'm fine, just hold on." i manage to muster out, the pain slowly subsiding with each second he remains inside me, his small moans acting as motivation to fully sink down onto him inch by inch, my head tilting backwards in pleasure whilst his nuzzles into my chest.
"oh god..." he groans, maintaining a secure hold on my hips as he begins to move me up and down, my body rocking back and forth whilst begin a slow rhythm. seeing his lips parted, forehead glistening with sweat, eyes closed and breathing uneven is almost enough to send me to my climax itself, the look of pure ecstasy on his face pushing me to keep going, moans eliciting from the back of my throat with each movement.
he attaches his lips to mine quickly, stopping any sound from escaping my mouth as it is soon merged with his, my movements now irregular, body becoming tired. it takes only a few seconds for him to begin thrusting upwards into me, hitting the spot where i long for him most, causing me to collapse forwards onto his chest. my hands wrap around his neck, touching any part of him that I can get access to, my mind struggling to grasp that this is reality - the pleasure so overwhelming that everything is a blur.
yet the hold he has on me, the way he moves in and out of me so perfectly confirms the truth of the situation, the strength of his hands clutching onto my hips definitely leaving marks. however i am too hazy to care, my vision clouding, hands raking down his back as i waste no energy in attempting to mask my screams.
"i'm close." he mutters against me, quickly flipping me over so that i am withering helplessly beneath him, a puppet attached to his strings, more than happy to be endlessly devoted to him, because a life without him is not one that i am able to live, whether it is intimate moments like this, or simple ones in which i am blessed with his presence, i crave him. like a drug, i am addicted, failing to function without him.
he begins to thrust harder and faster, his lips attacking my neck with such intensity that purple-ish marks begin to form in place of the sun-kissed skin. and all it takes is a few deep thrusts to bring him to his release, his dick twitching before releasing inside of me, this soon triggering my own as i pull his face to rest against mine, our foreheads touching whilst his eyes gaze into mine, my mouth falling open as he rides out our highs, collapsing above me and resting his head in the crook of my neck, planting frequent short kisses onto the skin.
his hands stroke my hair, my body instinctively leaning into his touch, the sound of his heavy breathing against my skin only fuelling my lethargic state as my eyes flutter closed.
“i love you so much schatz.” he whispers into the comforting silence, a lazy smile spreading across my face in response. “i promise i’ll never let you get hurt again.”
"i love you too." i reply, looking up to find his eyes already on me, my face leaning in towards his as i plant a soft yet passionate kiss on his swollen lips, reaffirming my love for him despite the verbal confirmations just seconds before. and i soon realise that this is real love, not what i thought i had with him, what i had witnessed earlier on seeming more and more insignificant with each second that i spend within tom’s embrace.
