( &—- something tragic about you. )

sweetheart, you're unhappy. like the light has gone from your eyes. BINKS GREENGRASS. seventh year. slytherin. pureblood. death eater supporter. a seer.

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dolxhov. 

“I’d use the whole, I’m not a good dancer line but, I am highly skilled in every area so that would be a lie. The truth is I just don’t want to dance with you, or anyone, ever.”

          &&.   “i’d feel obligated to scold you for stealing the line from those whom REALLY can’t dance if you did, so that’s that.” as the only two people binks was interested in dancing with were either not present or a non possibility: she was content to remain seated. “how’s head boy at a ball teeming with inappropriately behaved teenagers fairing for you, eryx?” 

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a BIANCA GREENGRASS aesthetic.

↳ ( VALENTINE’S DAY BALL. )

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cagedbyexpectation. 

Fleur intertwined her fingers with her best friend’s, sitting down next to her easily. “Well, it’s not like I can’t agree with them. But I do really appreciate it, they really aren’t as bad as they could be around me towards my house. I consider that their own brand of … kindness.” Mentioning the boys being KIND in any way, shape, or form was definitely a stretch but leave it to Fleur to do so. “Anyways, it’s our last year here. After next year I’ll never have to mention this ruddy house again.”

          &&.   binks directed a peck, light and yet a compacted expression of ALL the affection she felt for fleur rowle, onto the girl’s hand. her confidante. HER LIEUTENANT. “a secret, f? you could be a gryffindor and a hufflepuff and a ravenclaw all at once, and we’d still love you no less. this friendship of ours, our boys and us: it knows NO bounds. we’ll be linked like this forever.” she laughed, laying down in the grass. the sound, for a rare moment: wasn’t slicked in sadness. glossy and chiming. like it used to be, once, when they were just girls. 

          “soon i’ll be married to gab, and you’ll move in with us, of course. we’ll leave this murky castle in the dirt. can you imagine it, fleur?” binks asked, a sudden light flickering in her eyes. “we’ll all be happy together. everything will be  p e r f e c t  again. you just have to marry eros, so we don’t end up with some dim witted bint in our midst.” 

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freyamclaggen. 

“True, but that expression is seriously dragging down my mood, so my point still stands. – Not to speak of the aura you’re projecting right now.” 

          &&.   “unfortunately, it has seemed to escape you that i’d have given you a softer one if i felt you earned it, FREYA. we’re not friends: you DO NOT get my graces.”

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leolestrange. 

“i’m not trying to be– how is it fair that i always have to give in, huh? how is it fair that i get these lectures when they were the ones who wouldn’t leave. and i didn’t throw him out of the chair i just tipped him out of it.” she tried to defend herself but she knew it was no use. “bianca– don’t do that. please don’t do that.” her whole body went cold with binks’ threat, causing the color to drain from her face. telling them that she was something other than quiet and obedient would mean an angry mother –and she was bad enough as she was. “you wouldn’t do that to me when all i was doing was defending myself. i t-told them to mo-ve because i was saving it for nadia and-d they wouldn’t listen. please don’t tell her. please?”

“you poke and pick at them. they POKE and PICK back. i’m not asking you to give in, i’m TELLING you to stay away from them. you can’t tip people out of their seats and assume they won’t one up you. it’s not anyone’s problem but your own if you can’t handle what you brought out in eros and sterling.” binks steeled herself, turning her nose up at leonie. “underestimating what i’d do for my friends is a mistake. stop making a nuisance of yourself with them, and we won’t have a problem.” 

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leolestrange. 

Leonie was speechless. She tried to hold it all in and yet that was also the wrong thing to do. No matter how she dealt with the feelings that suffocated her, someone had a problem with it. The tears that had clouded her vision, spilled down her cheeks as she looked down at her cousin in disbelief. Sure, it was the kind of response she got from everyone but some how this one bothered her more than the other times she’d been told that. Leonie took a slow breath in attempt to steady the shake in her voice. “I’m sorry. I can’t be how you want me to be. I can’t suffer in a way that makes you and everyone else comfortable. I’m so sorry, Bianca.”

“save it for nadia or amma, leonie,” she snapped. “you make a terrible martyr, you know? playing innocent doesn’t WORK when you’re a little brat who brings misfortune on herself. if eros and sterling bother you, perhaps stay away from them? of course they’re going to react when you throw them off chairs and run your mouth. what else do you EXPECT? if you can’t reign yourself in, then just stay out of my way. i wonder how your parents would take being informed about your running about, disgracing yourself to respectful pureblood students? not well, i imagine. stop antagonising my friends. i won’t warn you again.”

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sterlingrosenthal. 

“A knight to you, but an ogre to everyone else apparently,” he shrugged. Sterling had a habit of only being able to hold Binky’s gaze for merely a couple of seconds at most, and it was most fleeting whenever she returned his smiles. “You are?” He hated how he sounded so hopeful, how his eyes betrayed it, too. He had no idea she felt the same way. As she continued, however, he felt his cheeks instantly heat up, and a shy smile slowly spread across his lips despite his resistance. “I care about you a lot, so– ” he gulped, cautious in his choice of words, for he could feel the conversation steering into forbidden territory. “I’m glad.” Stupid. He was so stupid. It was so cold, and yet he hadn’t given her his jacket. Hurriedly sliding it off, he leaned in slightly to throw it over her but felt his heart race, so quickly receded to hanging it off her one shoulder with a quiet ‘have it’. How fucking stupid. For some reason, her statement felt like a confession. It eased him. “You do, you know? You do have me.” In every way possible. “Never forget that for me, will you? Even if we… I don’t know, drift apart after school or, I don’t care what it is, but if anything makes you doubt how much you mean to me, forget it. You will always have me.”

“well, everyone ELSE just doesn’t know you like i do. besides, being unwilling to indulge stupidity makes me an ogre to my cousin, also,” binks assured, and shot a pert, subtle smirk his way before he could divert his gaze. her features shifted completely, however, when he leaned toward her. she felt the tiny hairs that lined her skin stand on edge, her shoulders tense. that wasn’t supposed to happen. eros could hug her and kiss the top of her head and accidentally brush her arm, and it may as well have gone unnoticed to her. mindless affection between friends. but if he came within an inch of her? binks’ heart practically jumped out of her throat. the space between them seemed vast, and simultaneously too close to bear all at once. idly, she shrugged the jacket over her narrow frame, distracted by sterling’s request. the suggestion that, perhaps, one day, they wouldn’t be as close as they were right there and then seemed absurd, and it HURT. in a sudden, unforeseen way. that he’d be absent from her side, in one way or another, was something she desperately didn’t want to dwell on.

        “i won’t,” the girl said, quickly. “i won’t forget it.” before her head had the chance to catch up with her heart, binks’ hand was extended, her fingers just barely catching his jaw as he began to look down again. “——— i could NEVER lose you, sterling rosenthal. not even if i tried,” her words were doubtless, genuine and true. they were followed by a bold, fast peck to his cheek. which, in turn, was followed by binks’ hands slipping down the small of his back, where she directed one purposeful shove. it sent the boy tumbling toward the water they had sat by, and brought girlish laughter bubbling from her lips. she stood, shook off the blanket and the jacket, and followed suit, throwing herself into the lake. 

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roseweaslvy. 

“Valid point.” Keeping her eyes locked on the lake, Rose couldn’t help but frown when she heard how long Binks had been out there. Although she didn’t exactly care for her well-being, she didn’t actually wish anything bad upon her, and losing track of time in the cold was never a good thing. “Look, you can do what you want, but… maybe you should head inside soon? You could get sick.” Rose cast her a glance before fixing her gaze on the snow covered ground, trying to figure out what to say. “It’s… difficult, sometimes. To quiet the noise. My mind won’t shut up. I guess I just needed to get out of my dorm for a while, and it’s so peaceful here. It was the first place I thought of.     What about you? Why did you come out here?”  

—- “i thought so, too.” at the twinge of... concern, or something akin to it, binks turned to the girl with a brow raised. “they have potions and spells for if i get sick. being a little COLD isn’t the worst that could happen to a person. in fact, sometimes, it’s like... resetting, in a way.” of course, logically, weasley was right. she’d been sat there for who knows how many hours, and binks was vaguely sure her fingertips were burning. yet, she wasn’t alarmed in the slightest. “i imagine it would be, living with a pack of gryffindors. i get headaches from sitting too close to your table at supper. how do you  E V E N  hear yourself think in there?” binks shrugged. “i felt i was forgetting what the lake looked like. finding time to sit outside escapes me. seventh year is terribly taxing,” she tacked onto the end, though the school year felt like the least of her problems. 

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leolestrange. 

“I…don’t cry all of the time!” Leonie clenched her fists at her side, crumpling the letter she held in her hands. “If you had to deal with even half of what I have to, I bet that you won’t be so quick open your stupid mouth about it. You’re no better than them! You’re no better, you– you hag.”

—- “you’re hardly the first person in this world to SUFFER, leonie lestrange, and you won’t be the last. try doing it in  s i l e n c e  for a change like the rest of us.”

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“have you ever attempted to do so?” gisèle’s tone was dry, tone unamused. “because i assure you, while human brains are not my forte, body material does in general tend to be rather MESSY. and setting fire to yours? perish the thought — the brain might be the only thing in life you ever call yours. moreover, i can see your argument. yet you ask people if they shouldn’t be in bed. hypocritical, isn’t it, when there are plenty of things we all SHOULD be doing, and plenty we are not?”

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—- “OBVIOUSLY not.” binky lightly shrugged narrow shoulders. “——— asking doesn’t equate to enforcing. i wouldn’t bother telling anyone what to do with their choice of sleeping hours.” except, maybe, a few of her friends, but a friend gisèle wasn’t. and she didn’t need to know the difference. “my brain may be the only thing that truly belongs to me?” binks echoed flatly. “what a TRAGIC thought.” 

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freyamclaggen. 

“Could you, like, go be sad somewhere else? You’re bumming out my whole area.”

—- “not incessantly talking doesn’t always equate to unhappiness.”

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sterlingrosenthal. 

“Yeah? Next time, Binks, just grab one of the boys. We’ll intimidate them so bad, you’ll never have to talk to them again. Got to look out for our girls, don’t we?” He nodded along slowly, looking down at his own hands. He wished he could beat away her sadness, even if it meant scraping off the skin off his knuckles until he bared bone. At the sound of her laugh, his head popped back up, and even though the undertones of her laugh were painfully clear, it still seemed to be just as infectious as he let out a low, boyish chuckle of his own. An expression Sterling could only be caught wearing around Binks; it was difficult to control the way he looked at her when they were alone. “Well, that’s no good… You know I’m here for you, right?” He said a little bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck. “Fleur, too.” He quickly added. “Either of you could be on the other side of The Great Lake, and I’ll swim like a damn shark and punch up the Giant Squid if it means you’ll be happy. Even if it’s just for a second.”

—- “my K N I G H T, are you?” binks asked, wielding a faint smile for him when he looked back up. sterling’s laughter was one of her favourite noises. unfortunately for the two of them, it only served to soften her resolve even further. how were they supposed to be just friends when he looked at her like he did? how could they trusted to be alone? “i do,” she replied. “and fleur, of course,” binks followed. listening to him describe what he’d do to the giant squid, she knew she should have inserted in a laugh there somewhere. laughing was keeping things light, FRIENDLY. but instead she just looked at him, brows pulled together. “even lacking fights with oversized lake creatures, lately i’m the happiest when i’m with you, you know?” binks eyes dropped to her lap. “i s’pose it’s your smile. i think about it when i’m not with you sometimes... you make everything feel a little less awful.” she hugged herself, like she suddenly realised it was cold out. “i’m so thankful to have a...  someone,” the word was said carefully, like she could  b r e a k  it if it had been uttered wrongly, “——— like you, sterling.”

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charlieflume. 

“I could be asking you the same thing,” Charlie shrugged, tucking her wand away. “had a late cup of coffee and now I can’t sleep. This isn’t the first time either so you would think I had learned my lesson, but apparently not.”

—- “you could have, but you didn’t.” binks’ eyes caught the wand, for a short second, before it was slipped away. “would you like to know how to solve it? next time, don’t have coffee.” she said, rather bluntly, before pulling her gaze away from the girl and toward the vast, static lake. then, a little softer, “perhaps, have you tried tea?” 

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giselerousseaus. 

gisèle normally didn’t frequent the grounds on her midnight jaunts, preferring towers to the level ground that was so much harder to hide in. she had felt like a flight to clear her head though, and the figure she had noticed in the dark on her way back had been too intriguing to not approach. she had sank down next to her, therefore, and fallen prey to her own thoughts, toe skirting the edge of water.

the voice pulled her out of her head and she looked up, shooting her companion a questioning look.

                              ——“maybe.                                    shouldn’t you?”

—- “i should wear modest clothing, and i should mind my tongue before men, lest i interrupt or outshine them. i should be passive. and never too loud, or too funny, or too provocative or too this or too that. and yes, i SHOULD be in bed.” it wasn’t that binks despised moulding herself to fit a patriarchal, pureblood society’s ideals. it was just that, “——— if i was every single thing i’m told i  s h o u l d  be, i may as well cut my brain out of my skull and set fire to it.” 

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andromedxs. 

Andromeda glanced up from the ground, her head turning to the right towards the voice. She’d been on her way back from the owlery, sending the first of many weekly letters her mother so scrupulously demanded. Honestly, it wasn’t as if much changed from Monday to Tuesday, or Wednesday to Thursday, and Andromeda failed to understand why one weekly letter wasn’t enough. Too immersed in her own thoughts, from essays to extracurriculars, Andromeda hadn’t noticed the figure beside the lake until she spoke.

          – - “Shouldn’t you?”

—- “i’d LIKE to be, i think.” sleep was easy. in theory, at least. just close your eyes and let it roll over you, right? it seemed better than this empty, blank awake that gripped her now. at least, with someone talking to her, binks felt mercifully less like she was fading into the waters before her. “i  s h o u l d  be. i’m not entirely sure why i’m not,” she said, recognising the younger slytherin girl after a moment of squinting into the darkness. andromeda burke. “——— your turn.” 

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leolestrange. 

Leonie quickly wiped at the tears on her cheeks at the sound of the voice. She’d spotted her cousin way too late and there wasn’t any way of just walking away. “Shouldn’t you? Don’t you have your man-children to put to sleep or something”

—- “if anyone is a child, leonie, it’s YOU.” binks liked leonie’s parents perfectly fine. she couldn’t fathom how they’d produced such a brat. “you could take a page from my friend’s books. at least they’re not running about crying all the time.” 

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cagedbyexpectation.

“Shouldn’t you?” Fleur quipped back playfully, raising her eyebrows. Taking a few steps to where Binks was sitting, Fleur looked down at her best friend, shrugging, “the Hufflepuff dorms just weren’t … pleasant tonight.”

—- her demeanour shifted considerably upon realising it was fleur. the slytherin reached up, intertwining their fingers to encourage her fleur to sit. “you are the only redeemable part of that house,” she noted, smiling, a fond glimmer in her eyes. “which is why i only let the boys make fun a little. as long as you’re a hufflepuff, they can watch their tongues.”