Sex and Relationship Advice for Trans Folks

By us, for us.

[trans-sex-ed]

Hey there! I was wondering whether you'd be able to help me. I'm nonbinary, transmasculine, and pre-everything. I just really don't know how to masturbate without trigging dysphoria (especially since my two most sensitive areas are also my most dysphoria-inducing: genitals and breasts), though I really want to do it. If you have any advice, I would be happy to hear it. Thanks! :)

Thanks for asking!

Masturbating can be a difficult experience for a lot of trans people, and I’m so glad you’re continuing to try and find ways to explore masturbation, despite difficult feelings it’s brought up in the past.

Here are 3 tips and ideas I hope you’ll find helpful:

1) Explore toys! There are a lot of really great toys on the market that might help you stimulate your most sensitive areas without having to touch/look at them. I personally suggest the Hitachi Magic Wand for vibration and clitoral stimulation, and the Njoy stainless steel toy for internal. Both are fairly masculine in appearance, and will give you a little bit of separation from directly interacting with areas of your body that are causing dysphoria.

2) Watch porn with trans guys in it while you masturbate. Seeing people with genitals like yours who have a masculine presentation might help ease dysphoria. Plus, it’s really hot. I just did some… research of my own. You can Google “trans guy porn” and plenty will come up, but I just found some videos I really like on a website called Thumbzilla.

3) Masturbate while wearing a VR headset. Okay, hear me out, this is something I do frequently. You can get a cheap (5 dollars) VR headset at Walmart, and search porn hub for VR porn. You will find plenty of “male POV (point of view)” porn that is unbelievably realistic and fun to watch! POV porn is filmed from the perspective of a person wearing a camera strapped to their head, so “male POV” porn will allow you to physically look down and see your penis and AMAB body. It’s a truly unique experience and well worth the five dollar investment!

I hope these tips have been helpful! Any feedback is more than welcome! Happy masturbating!

[trans-sex-ed]

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Trans sex ed is a blog by and for trans people. Ask questions about sex, relationships, bodies, gender and more!

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[trans-sex-ed]

Welcome to sex and relationship advice by and for trans folks!

It is nearly impossible to find sex and relationship advice specifically by trans people for trans people. When trans folks are forced to rely on cis people for information about our bodies and relationships, we not only risk being misunderstood and misgendered, we risk being misinformed about our physical and emotional health and safety. This blog aims to change the landscape for sex and relationship advice for our community, by providing a space for trans people to ask questions without fear of being outed by a public columnist, having our problems blamed on our gender, or receiving advice that is steeped in binary thinking and heteronormativity.

Please share this blog widely, it’s SO important to get the word out there so our trans community knows where to turn when we have questions about sex and relationships. And if you are trans and have a question, feel free to ask!