Ahhhh I love your male x readers! Can I get Parker Bradley x male reader headcanons? Fluff and smut of a male (he/him with bio male genitals) of someone who is his opposite?☺️
(Dark clothes hair ect kinda like the sun and moon)
Date Everything Parker x Male Reader who’s his Complete Opposite
Summary: It’s exactly what it says on the label
Warnings: Regular: Reader is specifically mentioned to be male, with the pronouns he/him and term “boyfriend” being used for him. Parker being Parker. Mentions of biting and little to no personal space for the reader (Parker is VERY physically affectionate). Reader is mentioned to not be much of a talker. NSFW: Top!Reader and Bottom!Parker. I know that the request specifically asked for AMAB/bio-male anatomy but my writing style for headcanons didn’t really allow any flow for that, sorry :(. But it is very heavily implied that Parker is the one getting penetrated though. Board game based sexual innuendos. References to other dateables (Hector, Ben Hwa, Betty).
Author’s Snip: I’m always happy to write for male readers of any kind so don’t be shy boys. I got you and will try my best to make something for you. Might not be too good if you don’t specifically since I’m an AFAB nonbinary. But I’ll do my best so long as you throw me a bone <3 I’ll also gladly write for the lovely MTF trans girlies too. Don’t by shy either ladies.
Notes: I really spread my Bottom!Parker propaganda it’s about to be Steven Grant all over again.
I’ll shut up now. Enjoy! And don’t be afraid to request.
Regular
I don’t really think Parker minds too much on the fact that you’re his complete opposite so long as you’re still down to play board games with him and aren’t a dirty cheater. He just likes that you’re willing to keep up and play with him and win your way to his heart fair and square
Someone described him as a puppyboy and like… yeah that’s basically how your relationship works on his end. He follows you around EVERYWHERE in the house (both pre and post realization) once you start dating and practically hangs on your arm all the time
In the same post someone also mentioned that the dateables also probably don’t have any true sense of sexuality inside of themselves, so Parker doesn’t really give too much mind on the fact that you’re both dudes because that literally makes no difference at all in your relationship
Gender and sexuality is a human thing, why would a pile of board games give a shit??
Sun and Moon you truly are though because you really couldn’t be more different from each other. Parker wears all sorts of colors both in his dateable form and post-realization. He looks like a rainbow rubbed up on him like a giant cat and the color rubbed off on him. And then there’s you, who you honestly don’t think you have anything that’s remotely colorful or on the lighter side.
His natural resting face is a smile and bright eyes while you have the most strongest resting b face, if looks could kill you’d be guilty of a lot of unintentional deaths because your face is just… like that. People are actually scared to talk to you sometimes because of how scary you look. Meanwhile Parker is there holding onto your arm like “This is my boyfriend! They’re great! Right, babe? :D”
It’s insane, truly a marvel
Parker is very VERY touchy and social, with honesty just about anyone, meanwhile you’re very quiet and don’t really do much physical interaction with anyone unless absolutely necessary, with your only exception being Parker who is always talking back and forth with you and doing things like holding your hand or arm and hugging you
Also, using “back and forth” when referring to you two talking to each other is generous because Parker does most of the talking and you just nod along and go “Yeah?” “Uh-huh” every now and again
He’s used to it though, he will actually do most of the socializing for the both of you
Whenever someone is trying to get you to talk to them then Parker’s there like “Oh, he doesn’t talk much.”
The other dateables have no clue how Parker “can’t-go-five-seconds-without-talking-his-head-off” Bradley managed to bag you, but they congratulate him on the pull
I hope you like biting… because you know… he does that canonically. It’s definitely a cuteness/affection aggression thing. It’s just this impulse that he can’t resist. I wanna say it’s not like “drawing blood” hard where he breaks skin but if he’s a puppyboy then you’re his chew toy because he’ll just gnaw on you and leave a few marks. And you have honestly just accepted your fate
Like don’t be surprised if you’re calculating your next move while playing a game, sitting next to him, or cuddling and he just starts gnawing on your neck/shoulder/arm
If he’s biting too hard you can also just move your arm/gently push him away and he will understand without you saying a single word and go “Sorry” and then start biting more gently on a different spot or just straight up stop
LOVES cuddling by the way. You have not known the meaning of personal space since you started dating Parker because your personal bubble has become YOUR (plural) personal bubble. Like I said, you just have to accept it, dude. You picked Parker for crying out loud
You come in a pair now. Where one is, the other is also there or close by unless it’s work or something that requires you to be separate
If you have tattoos like him, especially a sleeve like him, but like… your version, Parker likes to trace them. He’ll take your arm and just start tracing his fingertips on them and look at them. If you haven’t already explained them to him, he’ll be asking all about them. And yes he has favorites.
And if you keep adding to it and get him one that matches one of his, then he’s over the moon and bouncing around with joy
Anyways, going back to him being touchy, always wanting to be near you, and inviting himself into your personal space. He likes to sit on your lap and other stuff like that, like straddling you while your sat down at your desk chair or something. It’s not even sexual. He will just do that because it lets him be close to you
Again. Normally you would never do anything like this but Parker is just able to weasel his way into being able to
“You’re lucky you’re so cute.” Is something you say often whenever he does something that SHOULD cross your boundaries but doesn’t as a way to tease him, and it makes him giggle every time because he so totally knows
It’s like a dog that’s not allowed on the couch fully knowing that it’s not allowed but does it anyways
Same goes for sleeping. It’s like cuddling with an octopus
You dong even stop him anymore, you just adjust yourself so he can get in there
“My boyfriend” is also something you hear from Parker a lot too when he’s talking about you. He says it with such pride. “My boyfriend’s great at this.” “Oh, my boyfriend really likes that!” “My boyfriend this” “My boyfriend that”
You love him though. You’d gladly meet the expectations everyone has about you being able to kick their ass if anyone made him upset or sad
“He said no pickles” type shit <3
And Parker’s behind you like “Yeah! You tell em’ >:(”
NSFW (feel free to leave if you want)
Brat
What?! Who said that?!
Me 👉😌 I said that
I will be taking no criticism because I’m right and you guys know that I am. Don’t even start. Argue with Wallace, bitch
Okay he’s not intentionally a brat most of the time, if anything you guys just kind of fell into that dynamic
But he can be!
Especially if you wipe the floor with him in any games you play together since he likes winning so much. Like yes, he respects the game and understands that you won fair and square, and sportsmanship. But he can get all pouty and gain an attitude afterwards if he was so dead set on winning.
He’ll be like “Yeah. You were good.” all nonchalant and uninterested when you know he is normally so excited and will go on for a bit about how great your gameplay was
He might even subtly accuse you of cheating/rigging the game in your favor
“You did shuffle the cards a lot though.”
At a certain point you had enough of it and cornered him while you set him straight. “Hey! You know, I play fair just like you like it. I don’t do that and you know it. So quit being a sore loser and maybe I’ll let you win next time.”
Parker fixed his attitude very quickly after that but he was there like
He actually kind of had to leave for a minute to… take care of some stuff before coming back acting like his usual self
But that was sitting inside of him for a while after that wondering “How do I do that again but get him to just NAIL me?”
He was so awkward about it after a while too. He was not subtle about the fact that he had something on his mind
He tries playing it off and acting like he didn’t know what you were talking about until you started being more firm and he folded like a game board and spits it out really fast
Once you register what he’s said you just nod and are like okay we’ll figure out some rules for that and left at that
And my GOD has Parker been so happy since you guys established rules for how the dynamic will work
Side bar: I do feel like sex in general was a bit of journey in terms of introducing it to the relationship because Parker doesn’t really think about sex too much
Like he definitely flirts and does all that but like, that’s not to get in your pants. He just thinks your having regular couple’s banter and the whole lap sitting stuff is just him wants to be close. Like it doesn’t click in his sweet little head that like “Oh yeah. That could actually be a sexual thing.”
You definitely have a talk where you explain boundaries and all that to make sure you don’t accidentally give each other mixed signals, how to initiate, how regular foreplay would work for the both of you. But I don’t actually think Parker is as horny as a lot of other dateables are
You’ve learned to read each other well to know what you’re doing something with the intent of just doing it/affectionately and when it’s a way to butter the other up for some twister in bed if you know what I’m saying
Okay now back to you brat taming that twink
This is gonna be like me announcing that forks can be found in the kitchen, it’s a no fucking brainer, but the board games are definitely a huge part of the foreplay for it
You guys start playing something, he starts getting an attitude and being bratty, you push his buttons, he pushes yours, you subtly let him know you’re down and he continues, you guys play a few more rounds where you beat him some more, he gets more bratty, and then you decide to “do something about it” and proceed to play scrabble with his insides
Don’t worry, he can take it. He’s durable and wanted this
You can rough him up a little bit (maybe not too rough, but you can definitely manhandle him a bit, as a treat)
But you actually have to win at the games as part of the foreplay, he won’t give it to you that easily. You need to give him something to actually pout over
You fuck him into the middle of next Tuesday when it’s like this though. He can’t get enough of it
He can’t get enough of it in general when you get him going, even outside of the brat taming stuff. You would think that if you fucked him it would get him to shut the hell up but you’d be dead wrong. He just keeps yapping. Except now he’s begging for you to do all sorts of shit to him. “Slap me, pull my hair, touch me there, and there, and there.” sorts of stuff (real ones know that reference)
At least he’s vocal and lets you know what he likes and doesn’t like as you’re going, it’s actually really helpful and also sort of works like a rules game for you
“Harder, right there, not there, faster, slower, no not there”
And if you know him well enough you even know when he’s throwing a red herring “rule” at you
It’s not always rough hard though. He does like more soft and intimate stuff too. He’s a blushing mess the whole time whenever it is. He tries hiding his burning red face and you have to coax him out of it. It’s cute.
He is LOUD though. The whole damn house knows you two are having sex. Everyone’s cool about it but god damn at this rate Ben Hwa is subtly suggesting adding a gag to your sexcapades. Some of these dateables are trying to fucking sleep
At this point Hector’s moving to the furthest vent in the house just to get some peace and quiet (that’s a fucking lie his voyeur ass is so watching and wishing that it was him and we all know it)
So yeah if you can’t tell I am a firm believer in bottom!Parker <3
You get some really good sounds out of him though and they sound even cuter when he’s burying his face in the pillows and sheets
He’s not too picky about positions. He’s down to experiment. I wouldn’t say he’s super flexible but you could definitely bend and fold him into certain positions if it’s called for
The biting makes a come back and now with its additional companion, scratching!
If you’re doing missionary style or something like that where you’re face to face and he can bite something then he will. Usually your shoulders and neck. You can bite him too. You always could. Matter of fact it gets him going even more to feel you bite into him while you’re having at him
Same goes for scratching too. He will wrap his arms around your neck and or grip your shoulders, so naturally his nails end up scratching along your back
He blushes the morning after when the bites you left on each other show up as bruises and the mark of his nails are still visible on your back
Aftercare is a must to Parker. It’s part of the ‘game’ for him so you HAVE to do it. Regardless of who topped or bottomed. Like of course you do stuff to help him recover, but he’ll also make sure you’re okay too because he knows that topping can be as intense as bottoming. So don’t try and tell him you’re fine with not doing anything for yourself because he won’t have it
Like I said, Parker does all the talking for you, even if it’s through a Parker-shaped crater in the bed (Sorry Betty)
Diceplay is such a yummy scrumptious delicious ship because I cannot get over subtle, meaningful, bashful Chance… and Parker, who says the first thing that comes to mind.
They would be playing games together, having a good time, and Chance would be thinking to himself “hey this is great, we’re bonding, we’re forming a meaningful relationship, maybe this could work out” and then not ten seconds later there’s Parker with no warning “WOW I want you so bad please let me roll the dice please please please ple—“
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