Lizard Rock Anthem

Once when I was little, I went to a flower shop with my mom, and I decided that I was gonna touch all the plants along the wall. I didn't know cacti were sharp, so I touched one and it really hurt and I cried and that's how I learned cacti are sharp.

[skluug]

2+2 has got to be one of the most famous sums in all of mathematics. even the youngest school child is familiar with its iconic total: 4

[hiveswap]

Do you think theres someone out there on this site who is completely non lgbt yet has all their identity written out in their bio in the format of someone with detailed microlabels

[salamandiel]

I found him!

[trepanties]

I AM SO SERIOUS WHEN I SAY THAT I WILL UNFOLLOW THE FUCK OUT OF YOU IF I SEE YOU REBLOGGING THAT PHOTO-SET OF THE COCKATOO COVERED IN CHOCOLATE

That is not funny

That is not cute

It is animal abuse

BIRDS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO EAT CHOCOLATE

BIRDS ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE COATED IN CHOCOLATE

Why the fuck do you think birds who get coated in oil die? It’s for the same goddamn reason.

You idiots can have all the chuckles you want over the fact that that poor animal is “living the dream” but I hope you also know that it probably died from that.

And if you still find it funny then I genuinely do not want to associate you and can only wish upon you the most painful and awful death imaginable. 

[de4ct1v4t3d-deactivated20210506]

I just want to point out that no one is forcing the bird into the chocolate

No one pulled the damn thing in

In fact it fully appears to be waddling into the fountain by its damn self

Calm the hell down chocolate is not the damn same as chocolate

Its just a bird making a mistake and it’s fucking funny

It’s not animal cruelty unless someone was holding that bird at gunpoint fucking christ

[trepanties]

Oh good. I was waiting for some moron to try and defend this.

Listen here cum-slut, I bet you 5 million dollars that you don’t own a bird. But guess what? I own 7. And I can tell you right now that a bird would never just walk into something like a chocolate fountain. They’ll rarely walk directly into water.

But say that your idiotic theory is correct.

Say it did actually walk into it.

That animal still probably died.

Is that still funny to you? Do you still get your kicks out of knowing that that bird was probably terrified and opening its mouth to scream in that last panel?

And if you say yes then you seriously disgust me as a human being.

[rasec-wizzlbang-blog]

Guys those photos were fake, it was CGI, it was from that adam sandler movie jack an Jill

[relelvance]

Is anyone here russian

[officialbabymetal]

i am

[relelvance]

Have you considered taking your time

[officialbabymetal]

Take my time with what

[relelvance]

Russian sounds like rushing a little

[officialbabymetal]

Ohhhhh now that you mention it it does. Good stuff!

[relelvance]

[funny-tik-toks]

[turkeyimportedfrommassachusetts]

[zegalba]

Ink Artwork by Endre Penovác

[echofades]

I’m exactly the demographic where, for me, puberty coincided almost exactly with the arrival of the internet | MAE MARTIN: SAP (2023)

[inkonablock]

This. This is my millennial experience.

[maskysgirlfriendmoved-deactivat]

yall gotta be nicer about m/f  bc sometimes u guys like the blandest gay sutff ive ever seen in my life

[maskysgirlfriendmoved-deactivat]

gonna add onto this you all gotta stop acting like m/f is just cishet when bisexual people exist and straight trans people exist.

[maskysgirlfriendmoved-deactivat]

last add on alot of m/f ships of poc or white/poc ship are constantly downplayed for bland white m/m or f/f ships

[majorpepperidge]

#also sometimes u guys r just fuckig misogynist. abt the women in m/f ships. sorry

[b0nkcreat]

being a little kid was so funny bc you could literally just say somethint like “I think everybody should get along and share :-)” and all the adults in your life would go oh GODDDD STUUUPIIIIDD!!!!!!!! STUPID FUCKING KID ALERT!! Don’t uou know when you grow up you have to face the Government Mandated 100000 Wild boar Attack

[butchdykekondraki-moved]

whatever tumblr users did to breaking bad is the exact opposite of what everyone did to mlp

[butchdykekondraki-moved]

breaking bad fans will post shit like "JESSE. we need to pick up my estrogen before the fucking pharmacy closes." "mrs white can we get mcdonalds on the way back to the meth lab" and then you look over at mlp fans and rainbow dash is committing tax fraud while fluttershy smokes a joint rolled up in her taxes

[butchdykekondraki-moved]

for the record i think this is beautiful. i hope mrs white has a good life and im proud of her for coming out after living so long as a man. and i hope rainbow dash and fluttershy dismantle the pony government

[gallusrostromegalus]

Someone once pointed out that fic of a series contains whatever the original series does NOT contain, because much fanfic is essentially re-imagining the same characters in different genres.

So why does the Hannibal fandom have so many Domestic AUs? Because we've already seen what these characters are like in a horror-tragedy, now we want to see how they handle living happily ever after.

Why does MLP have some of the most fucked up fic out there? because we've already seen them in an extremely wholesome world, now we want to see them in a visceral horror.

Why is the version of Breaking Bad that lives on tumblr so Silly and Absurd? because the original show was very serious and grim, now we want to see them be happy little weirdos doing slapstick.

And I also think that's beautiful. The human experience is vast, and playing with "How would Blorbo react if I put him in this situation?" is an important way of learning how to appreciate the beauty of that vastness.

I also think it's beautiful because it's DEEPLY entertaining to watch someone move characters from one genre to another like redirecting the flow of a river.

[assdevourer]

the usa shouldn’t be the political and economic focal point of the entire fucking planet, actually

[overzealous-imagination]

So while rewatching Avatar: The Last Airbender recently, I noticed a trend

A number of spirits we see have an animal form, specifically animals we recognize as "normal" for us. For example:

- Wan Shi Tong is an owl and his knowledge seekers are foxes

- Tui and La are koi fish

- Hei Bai is a panda

-The guardian of the mother of faces is a wolf (The Search)

Heck there's even the talking Baboon spirit and the monkey missing its face that we see in the Spirit World at the end of Season 1.

Basically every time we've seen a "normal" animal, they've been a spirit.

My point? I argue that Bosco is a spirit bear that's chilling and living the good life in the mortal world just because he can.

[straycatj]

hello mr j! i think you and kofu are very cute

[straycatj]

Can you say one of your younger friends or family who is rude, rascal and violent is cute because of their appearence even if they were adult!?

[straycatj]

Please imagine;

You are around 60 years old, and your son in law around 25 years chases you at full speed then bites and beats you every day, can you say he is cute!?

[destery]

[guerrillatech]

[amateur-climber-pro-shitposter]

Their mock election was so realistic the school even played the role of the CIA

[mtfoss]

Disabled people have to live somewhere poor people have to live somewhere you cant just exclude us from everywhere

[mtfoss]

"What if theyre dirty" is it worth killing us over?

"What if theyre loud" is it worth killing us over?

"What if it would inconvenience me" is it worth killing us over?

People die without housing.

[mtfoss]

People have been mentioning it so I want to explicitly say this includes addicts

[larval-tear]

Apple Bottomjeans is a beautiful gname for a gnome

[irischroma]

Boots Witherfur is a joyful gname for this gnome’s friend