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Misplaced Lens Cap
gracie abrams
d e v o n
h
Discoholic 馃
Mike Driver
Love Begins
almost home
YOU ARE THE REASON
bliss lane
shark vs the universe
if i look back, i am lost
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Not today Justin
Show & Tell
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blake kathryn
noise dept.
seen from United States
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seen from France
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@tweetsunderglass
@foreeeeeal
"scientists don't want you know" is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know
11:31 AM 路 Jul 22, 2026
@tonydpoison
That scroll to find your year of birth is becoming increasingly offensive smh
8:44 AM 路 Jul 10, 2026
https://www.twitter.com/yumnah_elkhabir/status/2072977813519380512
(was not able to trace the origin)
@thewritertype
Not saying it's hot on the London Underground today, but I've just seen Virgil leading Dante down the steps at Baker Street tube station. They'll be taking the Circle Line.
3:53 AM 路 Jun 24, 2026
@fesshole
Office has a censor filter in internal comms to replace swear words with other terms. Added a rule changing "AI" to "my cat", so we get "According to my cat..." and "I asked my cat and it said..."
3:25 PM 路 Jun 12, 2026
@DrewVento
Day 3 of no caffeine and I鈥檝e lost hearing in my right eye
11:40 PM 路 Jun 9, 2026
@LambertEssence_
Some routines aren鈥檛 boring.
They鈥檙e load-bearing.
When everything else in a day requires a decision or an adjustment, the thing that stays the same isn鈥檛 a rut.
It鈥檚 a relief.
7:24 AM 路 May 27, 2026
@engineers_feed
Dickens: It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
Schr枚dinger: Nice.
3:54 AM 路 May 19, 2026
@OrevaZSN
One of my favorite human traits is when someone sees the moon and immediately feels the need to tell someone else to go look at it.
3:45 AM 路 May 10, 2026
Jaketropolis
"Shortly after Hammurabi published his legal code, I went through a significant loss..." [scroll scroll scroll] "...was looking for an easy, one pot recipe which could..." [scroll scroll scroll] "...eye for an eye..." [scroll scroll scroll] "First, take one leg of mutton."
11:52 AM 路 May 3, 2026
@Softnessa_
The kid next door (toddler age) is playing outside and just wiped out in his Fisher-Price car, and I just heard the babysitter say, "Oh no, your insurance premium is definitely going to go up!" And the kid who had only been mildly sniffling before made the most confused, but startled sound you've ever heard. Just very clearly an attempt at saying, "My what?" He straight up forgot about his scraped knee and is now worried about whatever the fuck an insurance premium is.
6:31 PM 路 Mar 14, 2026
@fesshole
I feel sorry for the utensils I use straight out of the dishwasher. They haven't had time to relax with their friends in the drawer and instead are being thrust straight back into work. Sorry favourite coffee spoon.
3:25 PM 路 Nov 16, 2025
@GalavizMonster
I鈥檓 so jealous of people who know how to shut up, I shut up and subtitles come out my face.
9:19 AM 路 Sep 4, 2025
@Sirbrianmay
Shout out to everyone making progress that no one recognizes because you never let anyone see your darkest moments. You鈥檝e been silently winning battles and transforming yourself. Be proud of every step you鈥檙e making in the right direction. Keep going because you鈥檝e got this. Bri
5:44 PM 路 Aug 28, 2025
@greywulf
If you want to rage against the dying of the light, press 1. If you want to rage against the machine, press 2. Repeatedly.
11:49 AM 路 Aug 21, 2025
@AfricanArchives
Goldie Williams, Arrested For Vagrancy & Refused to Unfold Her Arms and Stop Making This Face For Her 1898 Mugshot. (Omaha, Nebraska)
5:00 PM 路 Aug 19, 2025