So I've been struggling to get back into the blog because of many factors, the biggest being my depression and temporarily losing my job (it's a transition period, but it's enough for me to fall apart✌️), but there's another thing I also want to address regarding the blog, mostly for my own peace of mind... because it's something that's been bothering me.
This is about a Lyle that comes from a long life of isolation, slowly starting to breach the borders of his home to make connections. To try and give life another chance. I want to explore this together with Jeanne, how deeply rooted this pain is, the loss of losing Everyone Around You, and also how he can change his own course. How he is deserving of healthy love and care, and most of all, recovery. There is a lot there that I've been writing off the blog for a long time, this Lyle is deeply, deeply traumatised from the things he's been through, and his coping methods are... sick.
The game is about last chances. To not shun people in the dark. If Jeanne gets him talking, and spoiler I suppose but I believe this is needed? He'll tell her that this is his last chance. If someone rushes it, he won't be able to take it. If you understand. We'd have no more Lyle to follow.
This is one of my interpretations of Lyle.
A place to crucify a really mentally ill person. The aggression from some fans, not necessarily just the ones on my blog, but in the fandom as a whole... scares me to tell this story. I deeply believe in humanity... that people don't have to be irredeemable and must rot away in jail or be straight up killed so quickly, even if they never will be able to become who they once were again... I believe they deserve to keep on getting better. I believe they deserve that last chance. To Try and Change. Some crimes obviously more severe than others... this isn't an invitation to a debate, I hope you understand without me going into this what I mean. Please understand what I am saying, and what I'm not.
Does this mean I think what he's doing is Okay? No of course fucking not. If I thought it was okay, would we even be here?
But don't expect big reveals of showing people the dark room, or giving Lyle over to the authorities.
This blog is about Lyle's attempt at getting better.
If he succeeds or not, we'll just have to see.
It is Not about his chances being sabotaged and him ending up in jail or wanting to end it all. About people hating him.
Don't bring that expectation here. Why would I want to draw something so miserable? How could I find the motivation to put pen to paper for that? Would it be fun? Would it scratch a satisfaction in some people? I'm Not Doing That. Go get a fix somewhere else, I love seeing him suffer too lmfao, but this isn't the Place.
Again this isn't aimed at anybody in particular, this is something I've been sitting on for a long time, and it has made me not Want to draw, on top of struggling to be Able to draw.
