We all need some kind of escape from life.
Hey there, Dodie here. I just wanna tell y’all about how my week is going but before that, I want to ask how you guys are doing. How are you feeling? Are you doing okay? Is everything alright? If ever there is something the matter, something that’s bothering you, please never hesitate to DM me. I’ll try lending you my ear to listen.
Moving on with the main topic of this post, it’s around like, 9 in the morning and I haven’t got any sleep because I binge watched MatPat and like, Love, Rosie and The Perks of Being a Wallflower. So if it may seem that my thoughts are all around and isn’t clear, it’s because of the lack of sleep I have.
As some of you know, I am currently going to both therapy and review classes. I haven’t had any sort of interaction aside from the therapy people, kids and review kids. For outside of that, I don’t have anyone to talk to which is kinda sad but I’m getting used to it. It’s always been this way, I am a temporary person to everyone’s life- you talk for a short time and then the communication fades away.
For the past week, I’ve been going home late, too late as a matter of fact. Around 11, I go out of the house to go to my therapy. This kid, let’s call him Joseph, he is the sweetest most nicest person ever. He’s like the epitome of being a gentleman. He always opens doors for me when we’re together, keeps a distance when talking to me, and says the nicest things to me. He told me that he likes to have a distance with girls so that people won’t get the wrong impression of us and that was great. He has a girlfriend, I practically love someone whom I haven’t talked to for a week or two and I want to believe that we’ll be good friends.
Therapy was fine. Name, age, why we’re in therapy.
Uhh, hi I’m Dodie- that’s my nickname from other certain people. I’m 17 years old, the time of going to prison is slowly becoming a reality, and I’m diagnosed with a lot of things that I’d rather keep to myself.
Then the leader, or the doctor, would always ask us how we are doing after our short introduction. We’d all say we’re fine, but there were days everyone was down and we’d comfort each other.
Right after therapy, I go to my review classes where I’d rather sit alone at a table and just listen to what the teacher’s got to tell us. At times, a kid would joke and they’d all laugh while I’m just there, smiling. These past few weeks, I’ve also noticed that my ability to laugh slowly faded away. I noticed that I don’t laugh at videos. I don’t laugh at jokes. I don’t laugh at anything funny and I don’t know if it’s something good or something bad, my facial expression is limited to a smile but other than a smile, nothing more.
It’s around 6 or 7 when the classes are over and I can go home.
But that’s the thing, I don’t go home right away.
I go to wherever my feet takes me. I usually go to malls and such but I was just walking aimlessly. There was the urge of drinking. There was the urge of going to some sort of high parking and just sit there, looking at the city lights in both awe and disgust but I resisted myself.
Since I commute, it takes time for me to get on a jeep. I don’t do cars, they’re too expensive for my taste. I’ve been pretty lucky for the week, my phone and wallet is still with me so that’s something. There are just times that I go to this internet cafe and just play League until I’ve got no more money left (except for the commute money ofc). There was this one time I went home around 1. I was even debating whether or not I should go home and just ask people if I can just stay at their house.
But yea, that’s how my weeks are going. I’m kinda in the middle of debating whether I should play or sleep, but maybe I’ll take my first choice since I have therapy later.
Hey, take care of yourselves. You’re rad.
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