untitled_wxs.mp3

3 dots

tap delete

ty twin but i meant the poll eheh

i tapped smth and it wasn’t going away oops

OI WHERE DID MY POST GO… THE LONG ONE I DID YESTERDAY…

or do i not know how to use tumblr

edit i found i just get lost in my reblogs

why is taking your life so criminalised in religion?

why isn't god trying to understand your situation, instead they're like "off to helly you go" and then they dump you and leave you

#religion #islam #quran #holy quran #listening to music #I HEART MUSIC #i should pick up my keyboard it’s gathering dust #i’m sorry #i’m posting too many of these #she says and then she’ll probably post another 🥹#idk how to tag lol #vent post #i think #sorry about that

i don’t know about other religions :C but i’m just gonna talk about islam cause we can both relate

i don’t like the idea that an all-merciful god would see someone who suffered so much they felt their only option was suicide and just send them to hell forever

i think there’s a verse in the quran that says allah doesn’t “burden a soul beyond his scope” or something along that wording but like

like idk?? clearly those people were burdened to an extent they couldn’t cope with, maybe they were in a situation where they couldn’t get help or literally anything like i’m not here to list reasons because there can be so many

side note i went to find the verse that forbade killing yourself and the wording made me kinda uneasy

what do you mean that’s easy for allah. wdym it’s easy for him to send people to eternal fire. i know this is probably talking about how he’s all powerful or something but that makes me uneasy

it’s really sad :c i wish there would be more mercy in this

also i don’t want to encourage or condone suicide like i don’t know if what i’m saying implies that at all but that’s not what i meant by this :(

(glad to know you’re doing ok beanie <3)

#tw suicide #tw religion

it’s ironic my dad tries to demonise music saying i listen to it so much and tells me my time would be better spent reading the quran

when HEEEEE was the one that shouted at me all the time when he was trying to teach me to arabic

so now i get stressed hearing the quran whilst music calms me down- in the eyes of my parents i might as well be possessed by a djinn 😭

oh my god i remember during lockdown he would force me to sit at his desk for hours and shout at me if i made any mistakes omds that shit stressed me the fuck out haha

“not everyone thinks it’s haram” yes but that means going into the quran vs hadiths and that raises the question of whether you should follow hadiths or not and im too sleepy for that

my family does so that’s what i learnt of the religion i guess

i mean they could be stricter i guess. they’re both practicing muslims but my dad’s stricter than my mum eheh

i mean idk. they both think the hijab is mandatory and that

oh dang i actually don’t have a lot of knowledge about what they think

I’M TOO SCARED TO ASK THEM STUFF OK 😭😭😭 what if they go “untitled why are you asking these questions.”

i mean i remember asking them why the hijab is compulsory and they just went around in circles man. i heard what they were saying but they were saying nothing like it wasn’t adding up

IM SORRY IM SORRY IM SORRY DONT MEAN TO PROJECT ALL MY INSECURITIES AND UNCERTAINTIES ONTO ANYONE TwT

i don’t like being uncertain about things and this is one of the biggest uncertainties i can have bleeeeeeeeeeeh

@sleepytinyangycutiebean i’m not airing your posts i promise i just need to get my words together to reply (it takes me an embarrassingly long time)

i go off topic a lot do i

wait no how do i delete this

untitled you idiot

what kinda name is untitled

i’m sleepy (me)

i’m sleepy (you)

Remaining time: 1 hour 39 minutes

my lips are soreeee :CCCCCC

probably from biting and peeling them too much

sigh i need someone to kiss them better /j

shoot it’s LATE

quick question who the fuck thought it was ok to cram primary school aged girls into a room and teach them about hell

who on earth thought it was ok to teach them about how disbelievers will get tortured in the most inhumane ways for the sake of "islamic education" (my madressa oops)

bro that shit STUCK with me. 8-9yr old me was shaking after those horrid descriptions bro got like 2 hours of sleep 😭🙏

i still remember what they said, they said people in hell would be the size of mountains and their skin will burn off and regenerate endlessly and that the way down to hell is a 70 year free fall and that the people would beg for water for years and years and an angel would come after ages and they'd think they had water but they would be scalded with boiling acid and pus and that even if hell wasn’t eternal for you, you might be in hell for thousands upon thousands of years

one of the things that affected me most was that the teachers told us that if you went to hell and your family went to heaven, they would forget about you completely and live in complete bliss.

happy. without you. ow. ouchie. tiny me really really hated that :c

bigger me hates that as well. it’s embarrassing but i tear up sometimes when my dad talks about how on the day of judgement he’ll run away from me because i could oust him as a sinner or something?? every man for themselves?? and erm that upsets me i don’t want my own family to run away from me

i love them but we’re taught to love god more right.

holy shit man idk if i remember more there must’ve been- but it's singed into my memory, i think it's cause i was terrified hearing that? strong emotional reaction = stronger memory?? maybe??

listen tiny me had a very fragile heart and her tiny heart broke when she heard of that because tiny me couldn’t deal with people getting their hopes up after years of torture only to be punished again

would an all beneficent and all merciful god really send people to the depths of hell? this horrible eternal fate just for not believing in him?

er idk i’m sorry i’m putting the phone down now… i don’t like thinking about this

i mean apart from that. the teachers were kind to us, although i think they separated us between girls who had gotten their periods and girls who hadn’t (weird?!) and the older girls were treated a lot less kindly…

god i could make a few posts kinda like this. but it’s just venting at the end of the day, sorry you had to see this i hope the tags do something?? i hope you don’t see something you don’t wanna see

that’s if anyone sees this

#tw hell mention #tw religion #religion #islam #islamic #islampost #religious text #<- although i don’t mention anything directly i guess #vent post #sorry about that #i might delete this later #still don’t know how to tag #my faith is dwindling #it scares me #i don’t know what to think #i dont know what to believe #i don’t know much do i?

talking w my mum and dad and i asked them if smoking was haram and they kept going around the question being like “well it’s forbidden to do things that harm you” and “you have to follow what the prophet did” ok but that’s not what i asked is it.

i’m aware that tobacco smoking as it is today wasn’t around back then but like ok it does harm to you why would you think you wouldn’t

acc yknow what idek

i don’t have enough information to actually form an argument i’m just pissed that my parents hate on music more than smoking

(it’s funny cause even they can’t let go of it. they say it’s haram but they play music from random somali artists /nm all the time but they feel that it’s a bad thing to do?? doesn’t make sense)

like yeah let’s make an art form that’s been around for millennia before the prophet and has been proven to have a multitude of benefits to people haram

but something that’s been proven to ruin your health “disapproved of” or makrooh or whatever bullshit

i mean i don’t really care i’m still listening to music i don’t know what to believe anymore so i try not to think about it

i don’t know if i even want to follow this faith anymore but i feel sick thinking about hell if it’s real

ok sorry TwT have a kel to brighten the mood i didn’t mean to go on this long

#islam #islamic #islamic rulings #is that a tag #listening to music #can’t tag for the life of me #muslim #muslimah #oh shit some nasty islamphobic tags just got recommended to me #i’m good thanks #vent post #kinda?#sorry about that

i am a bean but not the edible kind

pls don't eat me ;-;

i don't taste good :,)

Om nom non

nuuuuu >.< im not edible waaaa!! :0 i don't taste good... aaauuugh...

Anything is edible if you try hard enough!

bbut i don't taste good :< wwhat if i offend ur taste buds :,)

Don't talk down on yourself like that I bet you taste perfectly fine

<3 thank youuu... ^w^

nekoqueenalice

OH MY GOD, I AM WITNESSING VOLUNTARY CANNIBALISM! 🤯 (Silly) (Joking)

i like to provide happiness to ppl :D

if it is in the form of being eaten, i am honoured (silly jokes, hehe)

can i try you then

:c oki

i am a bean but not the edible kind

pls don't eat me ;-;

i don't taste good :,)

Om nom non

nuuuuu >.< im not edible waaaa!! :0 i don't taste good... aaauuugh...

Anything is edible if you try hard enough!

bbut i don't taste good :< wwhat if i offend ur taste buds :,)

Don't talk down on yourself like that I bet you taste perfectly fine

<3 thank youuu... ^w^

nekoqueenalice

OH MY GOD, I AM WITNESSING VOLUNTARY CANNIBALISM! 🤯 (Silly) (Joking)

i like to provide happiness to ppl :D

if it is in the form of being eaten, i am honoured (silly jokes, hehe)

can i try you then

kururururururu

it’s a saturday how is everyone’s saturday going

i hate social interaction

i am going to explode in t-minus 6977420 seconds