vamistlezellas / vamistle

Jamie Rowley / vamistle / vamistlezellas ((DO NOT DATE HIM. NOT RECOMMENDED))

[vamistlezellas]

I don’t recommend dating vamistle / vamistlezellas / Jamie rowley.

He reminds me very much of my nerdy elitist gatekeeping ex. He definitely has the same vibe about him. Jamie is not welcoming. If you are a different type of nerd that is into your own things and you’re not into every single thing that he’s into, you will be rejected by him. Due to his very high and impossible standards.

He’s not understanding, caring or forgiving. If you are your own person and individual and you have your own likes and dislikes, if he cannot press all of his interests on you, in the form of wanting you to try everything under the guise “you’ll like it” and that if he’s wrong he’ll make a mental note, and that if he’s right he’ll make a note of it, because it’s all about being right for him, if you don’t do this he will be rejected.

Because again your interest, your own individuality is not good enough for him. If you don’t wanna try his things and do his stuff, you will be rejected. And he will throw out the line “but I would’ve did it for you.” Guilt trip, manipulation.

Doesn’t matter if you have issues with this and have explained why you have said issues with it. He won’t listen or hear it. He is uncompromising. My exes would flood my messages with Memes and videos and no longer words so I don’t like that. The exes would also scrutinize me and watch my reactions and then get upset when I didn’t like a movie or so-and-so. I don’t like that PRESSURE.

According to Jamie, it’s how he “bonds.”Doesn’t matter that we had all these other common interests and could find all these other activities. Apparently me not wanting to try a certain board game or watch something deems me close minded in his eyes to which he called me multiple times during our date. Misconstrued to mean, because I don’t wanna try some of the stuff, means apparently according to him, I don’t wanna try anything and everything be it restaurants, foods, etc. which is not true but not something he listened to when explained.

He doesn’t want a girlfriend. He wants a canvas he can mold.

This guy, will build you up, make you feel like he’s wanted you for the longest time, will have told you so, will talk about doing things like deleting all of his dating profiles because he’s so sure about you, he’s so sure it’ll work out, and then when you drop a bombshell that you’re not 100% into everything he’s into, he has to “think about it” now when it comes to dating you, he’s not sure about you, suddenly you went from the girl of his dreams to being incompatible.

He will deem you incompatible based off of that and deem you incompatible because you hate movie talkers. You don’t like when people talk throughout movies. You don’t like a peanut gallery. Doesn’t matter to you if you’ve seen the movie multiple times. He does not like that. And says things like he shouldn’t have to change himself for a relationship. Something so small as in not talking throughout a movie means completely changing himself and his personality apparently.

Jamie does not want to change, compromise, accommodate or anything when it comes to anyone in a relationship. He is not grounded in reality. Specially when it comes to relationships. He wants to be able to stay the same, stay as is and if a girl doesn’t like it, she will be rejected like me. Because apparently he’s perfect. And so perfect that when he gets with another individual, it will be perfect Harmony and smooth sailing and she will like everything and anything about him. Which wasn’t me so I was discarded.

Not a sort of guy you want to spend the rest of your life with if he is unchanging, unmoving, stubborn and will discard you just for the fact that you don’t like a peanut gallery when it comes to watching movies. Apparently that makes you incompatible as well. Because it means he has to change himself apparently and if he’s upset about that small thing, imagine the big things.

He also views not liking how he dress as another thing he shouldn’t have to change about himself and doesn’t want to change. He views it as a major change. A change she shouldn’t have to do in a relationship.

Most men cannot dress. Jamie is not the exception. He has some poor fashion choices. No one is telling him to change how he dresses, I was just saying there are certain things that I find more attractive that a guy wears. Which is not most of his wardrobe. Jamie is the type that wants to dress and cosplay almost everywhere.

When you have self-esteem issues like me and doesn’t like calling unwanted attention to themselves, this is an issue. To which Jamie argued about because apparently I dress a certain way at work which means why can’t he do it everywhere else. “ you do it so why can’t I?”

This is the blame game. This is a guy that’s not apologetic. This is not a guy that does not care about the happiness of his partner. Imagine long-term relationship, he would throw out this line I would imagine. Is that somebody you wanna spend the rest of your life with with that attitude? I’ve been with narcissist that would refuse an apology because I did something similar five years ago so why should he apologize for making me upset or hurting my feelings in the present date? That’s the same type of vibe I’m getting from Jamie. it’s almost like justifying cheating. That if one person cheats it should be OK for the other person to cheat to. That’s the vibe I’m getting.

Again, the guy doesn’t listen, doesn’t care, it’s not caring about the other person, only about his once in himself.

And, I wouldn’t recommend dating him if you’re insecure like me. His Facebook, Instagram, Fetlife an only fans feed is full of women. Full of women. Full of cosplayers. Full of women. He is very active on fetlife and only fans. Liking pictures of women, guys transitioning as women, guys cross dressing as women, etc. Me personally, I wouldn’t want to date a guy that behaves this way because it screams cheater, it screams wandering eyes, it doesn’t seem like a guy who would be faithful and all about his girl when he’s continuously on websites like that looking at other women and his friends list are full of other women.

I really really really liked him. He made me feel insecure and not good enough. He made me feel like everything that I was into already was not good enough. That me being a nerd as I am, into the things as I am was not good enough for him. It’s like he wanted to press everything else on me. And was very resistant when, for example I’m not a tabletop nerd, I don’t play board games, not anymore, no interest. It really hurt that he deemed us, despite our long conversations about everything else, incompatible based off of little things, trivial things, which apparently are huge humongous big things to him. And because of that, I don’t think he’s ever going to find a wife which is what I wanted to be to him.

So I wouldn’t recommend dating him. He’s not a nice guy. He’s not a good guy. He’s not a caring guy. He’s unmoving. He’s uncompromising. He doesn’t care about anyone else but himself. He will make you feel not good about yourself. He will make you feel not good enough and not worthy. There is so many things.

Not recommend.

[vamistlezellas]

I challenged a guy (Jamie / vamistlezellas / vamistle) to do this. He can’t which in my opinion means he likes me more than he wants to admit. 🖕🏽 And being the coward that is, he decided not to because he knows if he talks to me again, he’ll want me like he did before. Otherwise, it should be easy to look me in the face and say he doesn’t want me. So the challenge still stands and he’s still a coward. He knows what he had.

[vamistlezellas]

Weeb/Otaku/Cosplayer/Gamer/etc but I dress like the picture below. As cool as the shirt is above, I wouldn’t want a guy* on my arm dressed like that. Sorry. It’s a bit much for me.

Edit: no idea what the bottom shirt says. Point I’m trying to make is I like that it’s still nerdy but subtle and not over the top. 

The top picture is just cringe to me. Give me a shirt that tells me that my mouse pad is in the shape of boobs and that I have a body pillow with a half naked anime girl on it. Give me a shirt that says I’ll probably say “actually.” Give me a shirt that says I play video games all the time and probably has never had a girlfriend.

Give me a shirt that says I will probably ignore you if you’re my girlfriend because I’m too lost in my video games, card games, D&D, etc. and will neglect you like all the other nerd boys you dated in the past. (Hi trigger.)

I know it’s judgemental and harsh but that’s honestly what I think when I see stuff like that. 

Yeah I think the shirt is cool and the person looks really cool. But I don’t know. I like guys that dress normal. I like nerdy touches. 

I don’t like unwanted attention. If I’m out with a guy and he’s wearing something like that, it’s unwanted attention to me and I’m sorry I don’t like it. As one who has been told that all of her exes are ugly and that she has no taste in men, as one who has been made fun of because her exes were fat and so they judge me and think that’s all I can pull in, yeah I’m kind of self-conscious about what my guy looks like. Especially if I’m beside him. Because I want to be power couple. I want someone to look at both of us and think we’re both equally hot. Not look at my guy and think “what a fucking nerd.” Or worse.

Yes I am insecure. My past experiences have made me self-conscious and insecure. I’m open about that. Any guy the dates me has to be patient and realize that. Work with that.

I dress a certain way when I want attention on me on purpose. Then I’m flashy and showy. Any other time, I’m normal. And I don’t think normal is bad. When I dress sexy when I’m out with a guy, I want people to look at me and then look at him and think “damn how did he get that?” I do that sometimes because I enjoy being the trophy. 

But I feel like the same thing happens vice versa, when a guy is wearing that shirt above, they’re not thinking wow how did I get that guy or What does that guy see in me. blah blah 

yeah I know I shouldn’t care about what people think but there’s parts of me that do. I’m not a robot. I’m not inhuman. I have feelings. Oh well. kudos to you for being cold and callous and uncaring and indifferent and blah blah blah. I’m not like everybody.

You can be weird which I am and not be over the top about it. I used to dress like that when I’m was younger. Maybe I’m more relaxed? I’m only flashy in certain situations, atmospheres and environments.

If you haven’t guessed it, this post reeks of *Jamie  / vamistlezellas / vamistle who dresses like this. Who dresses like the shirt above. He turned out to be a arrogant, elitist, gatekeeping nerd. Who would make you feel inferior for not being on his nerdy level and doing the nerd things that he does. Like he did me. 

Dude is going on 39/40 and wants the dress like that too picture. I don’t think I would let my husband out of the house with a shirt like that unless we were purposely going to a convention or some type of game night or situation for it. You’re actually going out doing normal every day stuff dressed like that with our kid?

Yes I want freedom of expression when it comes to my kids and my family when I eventually do have them. But I also know that kids will tease and bully if the creative kid is out there wearing a tutu and rainbow colors. That’s going to mess up the kids self-esteem. I was that artsy kid. That creative kid. I have my battle scars. Not every community is accepting. Especially your own racially when you’re “different.” You get labeled other races or you’re trying to be some other race or they will go as far to say you even hate yourself because you’re open to dating other races. Because you don’t dressed and act like everyone else. So many things. 

He told me one time that he got stood up on a date at the mall and waited four hours. I was so tempted and wanted to ask him what was he wearing. Cause I’m willing to bet $5 million dollars he came out looking like a Weeb.

I want someone that’s hot. Anyone I date I already think they are attractive. I’m not thinking you’re hot in a shirt like that. Maybe temperature wise because you might be sweating but that’s really about it. I’m not eye fucking you in that shirt. I’m not wanting to peel off your clothes in that shirt. You’re not activating the automatic drip in that shirt. I don’t think any other girl is looking at you in that shirt and thinking you’re hot. Just my opinion. I don’t speak for all women.

I love weebs. I date weebs. I am one. Hell I even cosplay and go to conventions. I do so much nerd shit. But I’m not interested in dating the over-the-top weeb. Sorry. Tone it down. I’m feeling embarrassed.

For the sensitives, no I don’t speak for all women. This post is just my opinion. there is a person out there for everyone and I’m sure there’s some girl that will swoon over  that type of style. After all I like it. I think it’s cool. But I don’t see fashion like that and think I want to date that guy. I don’t see fashion like that and think “wow that guy looks good.”

[vamistlezellas]

It’s why I’m hesitant To date a guy who says he’s a big Star Wars fan. The reason I started my Star Wars group was due to my Star Wars nerdy elitist gatekeeping ex. We both had matching Star Wars tattoos. As in I had mine, he had his, we happen to have the same thing. But I wasn’t a real fan according to him because I didn’t grow up with it, because I got into it late, because I couldn’t quote it like he did, because I didn’t read all of the novels and comic books like he did, because I like the sequels and the prequel‘s, he would go on rants about agendas and the future is female and how everybody is destroying Star Wars, oh and I wasn’t allowed to like Star Trek either which I do, the list goes on. I wasn’t a good enough fan, fake fan, he called my nerdy tattoos false advertising, etc. etc.

Meanwhile the guy owns no light sabers, I own about five and I collect swords too. The guy doesn’t even do Lightsaber choreography which I do. He has no idea who the 501st are and a lot of the members know me by name because I would hang out with them. Personally inviting me to their air and scare event at the Smithsonian when I used to live in the area. I highly doubt he’s ever been to a Mando Merc‘s armor party like I have. He hasn’t by the way. The guy has never Star Wars cosplayed which I did. The guy has never been to a convention, which I have.

So yeah. I’ve always been curious about Star Wars, I’m looking for a non-jerk nerdy guy to hold my hand down the rabbit hole. To not make fun of me while I explore deeper. Unlike my ex.

Star Wars guys are very toxic, there’s posts in here where guys will say a dealbreaker is if a girl doesn’t like Star Wars. Newsflash to any guy that wants some thing with a vagina in between her legs, a lot of us aren’t into Star Wars hard-core. We don’t want a marathon Star Wars just like you don’t wanna marathon Bridgerton. I personally think there are better things to watch. I don’t swear up and down by Star Wars. It is not my life.

And if Jamie / vamistlezellas / vamistle is anything to go by, I seem to attract the ASSHOLE nerd gatekeeper elitist guy. where that guy, I wasn’t a good enough nerd because I was no longer into tabletop games and didn’t really wanna play them anymore like I used to. I wasn’t good enough because I didn’t share 100% of his interest.

It’s bullshit like that is exactly why nerd guys, most of them, don’t have girlfriends. it’s why we don’t want to be their girlfriends. And don’t get me started on guys who invalidate the existence of girls like me because I’m into anime, hentai, gaming, card gaming, cars, etc. I am too good to be true therefore I must be fake. Fake gamer girl. Fake nerd girl. Fake fake fake. Exactly why the nerd guys don’t have girlfriends. Exactly why my nerd ass can’t find a boyfriend because I can’t find a decent nerd to date that doesn’t go “actually” and start mansplaning.

[vamistlezellas]

Girl catches guy cheating via Fitbit

Story time: I dated a guy and we both had Apple watches. So we would share our fitness activity. It was a nice motivator. I would congratulate him if he filled his rings and stuff like that and vice versa. He was really annoying during sex when it came to the watch. Because afterwords he would always ask me what was my heart rate. How many calories did I burn. It was annoying to the point I stopped wearing my watch during sex just to avoid that. It was like a competition. It took the fun out of it.

Anyway, I want to type of relationship where we can share fitness activity, location sharing, because I have nothing to hide. I actually did that with the X sharing my location via Apple. it’s not about spying. It’s about security. It’s about loyalty. It’s about my man know and he’s got nothing to worry about because I’m not doing anything with no one except him. He can have my phone. He can have my location, he can have my activity sharing because I’m not doing anything. If I’m burning that much calories at 2 AM, I better be running for my life. Because I’m definitely not cheating.

Edit: To include Jamie / vamistlezellas / vamistle. When I thought we were serious and that this was something that was going to be serious, I offered my location to him. He told me he didn’t care. That hurt. It was me showing him that I am interested in him and only him. That he has nothing to worry about when it comes to me and other guys. That I’m not sneaking around at 3 AM or doing anything. In fact I have nothing to hide. So much so that I can give you my location freely because I’m not doing anything. Like I said, he said he didn’t care. I guess he didn’t see the meaning behind the gesture.

But, that’s the type of girl I am. You can have my location. You can see my phone. You can share or see my fitness activity. I am monogamous. I am loyal. Just because I have an only fans, does not mean I’m doing anything with those guys. If you associate having an only fans with pos ta tuition, go ahead and associate it with that. That’s on you. That’s not what everyone does. When I have a man, I am about that guy and no one else. Even when I don’t have a man, I don’t give my body to just anyone. Demi sexual/sapiosexual. Monogamous. Marriage minded and marriage ready. Why would I want a hook up? Why would I want a FWB? Brings me nowhere close to my goal.

[vamistlezellas]

The guy* I was into that wasn’t into me after I revealed that I don’t share 100% of his interest, this was a complement. One where I told him to stop copying me. It was said with/in affection. Because we were into so many of the same things that I would joke that he’s copying me. That he’s copying being into what I am into. But if you look at my profile and read up on some stuff, you know why it didn’t work out with him. In short, apparently being into some of the things that he was into and having similar interest wasn’t good enough for him. Him being Jamie Rowley / vamistlezellas / vamistle But I’m sure there are loads of single, Nerdy, Gamer, geeky, sexy Otaku, cosplayer girls like me who are into him like I was just lining up to be with him and wanted a future with him such as marriage and being a wife to him. I’m sure he has loads to choose from. 🖕🏽 since you know, I wasn’t good enough and didn’t meet his high standards apparently.

[vamistlezellas]

[vamistlezellas]

Snob

During our date he was very insulting throughout. Repeatedly calling me closed minded.

Me, who is a Nerdy, Gamer, Otaku, Cosplayer, geek. Me who dates outside her race. Me who has dated Republicans and Trump supporters multiple times despite having no party affiliation. Me who has dated bisexual men and men who cross dress as women. Me who watches hentai and has cosplayed hentai characters. Me who is pro choice. Me who doesn’t follow any religion yet has dated Christians, Seventh-day Adventist, and various other religious folk even though I don’t follow. Me who has dated guys into Gore has actually watched it with them just to see what they like. Me who has dated 10 years younger and 10 years older. Me who has been in open relationships and in swinging situations. Me who is very sexually adventurous, open and even experimental.

So many things yet I am the one that’s closed minded?

When we were in a toy store and I was showing him the board games that I am interested in and that I like, he wouldn’t bother. He had to check the reviews. And if the game got a review that was under six, he didn’t want to try it or even look at it. I found this very surprising. I found that very close minded yet he had a nerve to tell me that I’m the one that’s close minded? Close minded because I didn’t want to try many of the board games he was suggesting or into because I’m not really a table top gamer or board gamer anymore and therefore wasn’t interested.

But this dude is a lemming. He won’t try something, buy something, go to a restaurant or whatever depending on the reviews. He literally stood there and checked the board game reviews for the game on his phone while we were out.

Now me being the individual that I am, I don’t go off of reviews. It could be movie reviews or whatever. I don’t factor them in. Because a lot of movie reviews for example, are by old people who don’t like superhero movies which I love. Then you have the groups that notoriously will troll movies and give bad reviews based off of the cast or whatever without having even seen said movie.

So I take none of that into account. If I like it I like it. No other persons opinion on some thing is going to sway me from that. But that’s not Jamie, who apparently can’t think for himself and needs the opinions of others.

Yet again, I’m the one that was being called closed minded throughout the date.

OK.

Like I said it was insulting and I told him that. I didn’t appreciate being called close minded repeatedly during our encounter just because we have different interests and hobbies and likes. This guy is mean.

Apparently I’m not allowed to say no. I’m not allowed to like what I like. He will press things on you and then call you close minded if you don’t wanna try or if you’re not interested. And he will guilt trip you by saying that he would’ve did it for you.

I don’t have anything good to say about this guy. And if this is a type of guy you’re going for, again knock yourself out but I don’t recommend dating him. Not with his attitude.

[vamistlezellas]

he wasn't a switch, he was/is a sub

This post is long overdue and I was debating on saying anything at all, but I decided to do so. And that is about our sexual encounter, the disappointing sexual encounter with Jamie Rowley / vamistle / vamistlezellas .

I am a bratty sub. I am a submissive. I love it when a guy takes control in the bedroom, when he’s an alpha, when he’s a dominant. His misleading fetlife profile said he was a switch yet in the bedroom, this girly boy sissy was anything but and is a complete submissive.

There was no alpha energy. No Dom energy. You tell him what you like, you tell him to take control and he’s so indecisive and over thinking that he does absolutely nothing.

During some coaching, he stopped right in the middle, leaving me hanging and sexually frustrated saying “yeah this is not going to work.” I thought this meant break up, not interested and I asked if he wanted to just take me home vs me who was staying over the weekend.

He talked about having to completely change his personality if it meant meeting my needs in the bedroom. Which I have no idea why even role-playing a dominant means you have to change your personality. His fetlife profile said he was a switch (and bisexual, then changed to hetero flexible, even though he told me he was straight in person). I thought that meant switching between dominant and submissive but apparently not. This was basically him being sexually selfish like all my other previous partners. As in order to please me, apparently he needs a complete personality change. -eye roll-

Now if this type of guy is your thing, knock yourself out. Talk about false advertising and cat fishing. If I knew I was getting that in the bedroom, well the bedroom wouldn’t of happened.

To rectify the situation I had to tell him to “repeat after me.” So while I was taking care of myself, as in masturbating, because he wasn’t doing a good job pleasing me, I decided to talk dirty to myself and have him repeat my words, words that I wanted to hear. In hopes that he would get the idea and take over, which he didn’t.

Sexually he needs some work. Granted I can’t say I was any better. I didn’t plan on having a sexual encounter with him which is why I didn’t pack any lingerie, do any shaving or anything like that. I can’t say I was too into him because if I was, he would’ve gotten a blow job, which he didn’t. Why do any of that when a guy can’t even meet me in the middle when it comes to my needs? Yeah he ate me out, but I need to be mentally aroused for other sexual things to happen. And he just was not following any direction.

Also, me being a sub, I did not like taking control, I did not like calling the shots, it felt very out of character and just did nothing for my sexual enjoyment. That’s the role he put me in, turning me into the Dom and I can’t say I enjoyed myself. -I- would have to completely change -my- personality for him in the bedroom. -eye roll again-

I’m not into submissives when it comes to guys. Sorry. I do like cross dressers. I like guys that dress like girls. I like feminine looking guys. But that femininity, I would want stopped at the bedroom. Or lease be able to switch to being the dom that I need.

Definitely not the energy I got from Jamie, A guy who’s profile said he was a switch but he turned out to be all submissive.

[vamistlezellas]

Far Fetched

I made some posts about Jamie and got two interesting responses. Somebody messaged me saying they knew who I was talking about and that the guy is a piece of crap. I found that interesting.

And then I went to a Gamer group and vaguely described my bad experience with a guy and that I’m looking to date a guy that’s not like the guy I was talking about. The admin came to me and told me that they kicked the guy out of the group a long time ago. About 2 to 3 months ago.

When I asked why, they said the same story and reasons that I was talking about. Where the guy was just mean and not accepting.

I shouldn’t be surprised and I’m not. The only thing I’m surprised about is how unexpected it was. To be contacted in such away about the guy.

And so it makes me wonder the real character of this guy. I have his defenders, being men, mostly men, not reading a damn thing I’ve been posting about. Viewing me as some she devil attacking some guy for no reason. Viewing it as man bashing, again not reading a damn thing I said.

And the thing about flying monkeys when it comes to narcissist, the narc will put on a mask for different people. The version of the guy that his friends experience, his family experience, and the girl that he was trying to date or get laid are completely different people.

And so the male defenders never saw that version of him like I did. They weren’t used or lied to or manipulated like I was. Because they’re men, and he doesn’t wanna sleep with them, unless they are cross dressing or posing as women or transitioning to women.

Point I’m trying to make is, of course what I’m talking about seems far-fetched and hogwash to them. Because they didn’t get that side or see that version. So they’re just writing me off as some rejected girl and that’s it.

But if that private message was anything to go off and an admin telling me he was kicked out of the group due to a similar story, maybe my story is not that far-fetched. Maybe there is some truth to it.

Yes rejection hurts and I’m still hurt over it and him. Because I really really liked him and wanted a future with him. But how I got rejected and why is what is making me angry and bitter. And so yes, some of my posts reflect those emotions.

Be that as it may, but like I said, those two messages, the common denominator, the common description, makes me feel like it’s not just me. That there are some personality and character flaws within him. And that it wasn’t just me who experienced them.

But of course the guys aren’t going to read that. Pack mentality. Gotta defend your own.

[vamistlezellas]

I’m noticing a trend. Maybe that guy is not a good guy. I had a private message telling me he was a piece of crap. Then I see he was kicked out of a group because of multiple reports about him. Interesting.

[vamistlezellas]

I wonder If my thoughts (see posts below) has anything to do with this sudden disappearance.

In my opinion this guy does it seem like the type of guy any girl should want to settle down with or be with and I made that mistake. But he rejected me. Also see posts below.

I mentioned in my previous post that this guy has an eye for women. He has an Instagram, Facebook, fetlife and only fans full of women. Was very active on fetlife and only fans. Commenting on women, guys cross dressing as women, guys transitioning as women, commenting, liking pictures and so on. Doing this on both fetlife and being active on only fans.

I have insecurity issues. I admit that. And I don’t know what type of girl, well a secure girl who doesn’t have said issues who isn’t me, would want to date a guy who behaves like that? Because it doesn’t scream faithful. It doesn’t say he has an eye for you and only you. He’s looking at other girls be it Instagram, Facebook, fetlife or only fans continuously.

Now if you’re a girl and you’re completely OK with your guy liking all these photos of other women, or even someone you’re dating, kudos to you but that’s not me. And I imagine that sort of behavior wouldn’t stop once you get into a relationship with him.

I find it an interesting coincidence that after my editorial piece yesterday, his only fans in fetlife has disappeared within a few hours.

He definitely made me self-conscious. Looking at his friends list and following list and seeing the pictures and comments he was liking of girls, people with feminine qualities or posing as girls, on fetlife, made me really self-conscious about myself. Made me feel not sexy compared to all those people he was commenting on and looking at. It made me feel no wonder he didn’t want me based off all the other girls he was following. That I didn’t look like.

And I imagine, if you’re a girl and you date him, you will feel the same exact way.

So have fun with that. I don’t want to be wife/Waifu to that. He’s all yours.

[vamistlezellas]

He is also a hit it and quit it kind of guy who will LIE just to accomplish that goal like he did with me. He prayed upon a marriage minded/ready woman like I am, claiming how he’s wanted me for the longest time, how he wants a relationship with me so bad, how he’s excited about us and wants us to work out to the point where he’s deleting all of his dating profiles just to make you believe that he’s serious about you. So that when he finally does sleep with you, he makes up an excuse right after to deem why you two are incompatible.

Him knowing that you never do one night stands, him knowing that you don’t sleep with anyone casually, him knowing that you don’t do friends with benefits, so he LIED saying all of these things to me just to have a one night stand. Now I have a one night stand on my record that I have never had before thanks to Jamie. I would have never ever slept with him knowing what I know now and knowing how I was lied to and led on.

He will cite that you’re incompatible because you’re not a table top board gamer like he is and you’re not interested in boardgames. So even though you have all this other stuff in common, because you’re not a boardgamer, you’re incompatible.

You’re incompatible because you don’t like when people talk throughout movies. You find it annoying. You don’t like the peanut gallery. According to Jamie by him not being able to talk throughout movies means he has to change who he is for a relationship and he’s not about change.

You’re incompatible because I don’t want link spam, I don’t want meme spam, I don’t wanna be pressured to try every board game and everything that he’s into because he doesn’t want me to maintain my own individuality and sense of self.

All excuses to hit it and quit it. Petty excuses. This guy is a liar and a manipulator. A guy that will do so just to sleep around.

Again not recommended. This is not a nice guy. This is not a good guy. Definitely has fuck boy mentality.

Jamie Rowley / vamistle / vamistlezellas



[vamistlezellas]

he made me more insecure

Too insecure to be dating a guy like vamistle. I'm too insecure to date a guy like vamistle. It's like he hasn't missed a beat from rejecting me. Already he's liking and adding girls on here, Fetlife, IG and FB. Social media full of girls. Also showing up as active on OF. He built me up. Talked about how he was admiring me for over a year, how he wants us to work out, how he just KNOWS I'm the girl for him, we see one another, days later, he deems us incompatible because I'm not into EVERYTHING that he's into. Not into table top, meme spam, link spam, his horrible loud shirts, the fact that he wants to talk through out movies, and so on. All those little things, suddenly are huge deal breakers for him. How "oh I'm taking down all my dating profiles" to not hearing from him ever again. How he was so sure about me then not want me days later. That crushes a girl. Besides, looking at his follower list here, FB, IG, OF, I'm too insecure to be dating a guy like that anyway.....looking and following girls like that. Just screams cheater and wandering eyes. I want to say I dodged a bullet but I really liked him and it hurt how he discarded me so. And looking at his FL activity and such, yeah it's good that we didn't work out but it still stings. Here I'm am still heart broken while he's adding and following girls as if all the stuff that transpired between us meant nothing and it didn't happen.

[vamistlezellas]

friends with someone you want a relationship with

I don't understand guys that want to be friends with girls that want relationships with them but they don't feel the same way about the girl and don't want a relationship with that girl. Yet the guy wants to talk to the girl even about fandom stuff knowing the girl wants him in a different way, likes him in a different way, but he doesn't feel the same way back, isn't going to change his mind (said so about it) and has no intention on being anything beyond platonic friends (said that too). Even though the girl has voiced she wants more. Why do guys do that? Why even talk to her? Why be her friend? Especially when he doesn't want to "hang out" one on one ever, only in groups. When the only thing he wants to do is talk about fandom stuff and not what happened between the two or what could be. When he's flat out said he doesn't want a relationship with the girl and that it's not on the table? Why be friends at all? Why talk? When it absolutely doesn't benefit the girl at all except torture her, deepen her want of him and a relationship with him? What's the point at all? When he only benefits him. I rather have no one to talk to at all than deal with that. He wants me to deal with that. I could see if a relationship was on the table. Then I'd have motivation and reason to endure that torture. But he doesn't want that. It's a waste of time. What's the point? It's a dead end. There is no end goal. He's not going to change his mind because we both hurt one another and he's deemed us incompatible. And having fandom chats isn't going to make us discover one another. For me, it's only going to deepen my want for him while he's already detached. So what's the point? He got mad earlier saying I didn't even want to try to be friends. Why!? Why when I want to date. Why when I want him in a different way. Why when I want him physically. To tease myself. To be longing? To have false hope? To be there literally waiting for him to change his mind? Why do guys do this? I don't understand it. What's the point of keeping me around as a friend? For someone to talk to? Well he has roommates, game nights and social media lists full of friends. He hasn't voiced that he even likes me or likes talking to me. If he said that, it would have made sense why he's doing the crap but he never even said that. It still wouldn't make me want to entertain that torture fest. But it would have made sense. I just doing understand guys.

[vamistlezellas]

i wasn’t good in bed during our 1st encounter

Maybe he would have stuck around if the sex was better. In today’s episode of blaming myself and wondering what of all went wrong, maybe he would’ve stuck around if I performed better. I hadn’t had a sexual partner in years until the night with him. There was a lot of things I could have done that I didn’t. Things I actually worried about doing due to previous partners killing my self-esteem on that. I didn’t really get him off. He got off but it wasn’t by me me. As in it wasn’t by my mouth. It wasn’t by my hands or inside of me. He had to get himself there. Which, it’s not like he really needed me in my opinion. So it’s just more things I blame myself for. That he probably would’ve stuck around if I gave him amazing sex that night. If I had even prepared for it. I wasn’t groomed or anything. Didn’t pack any lingerie or anything because I didn’t plan on it. He probably wouldn’t have given me up so easily if I was more pleasurable.

[vamistlezellas]

i don’t want a guy that follows a bunch of women

I don't want to date a guy that has a bunch of sexual women added/followed on his friends list. I've posted about this last year but posting it again due to the drama with Jamie (vamistle). I didn't realize he wasn't blocked on my fetlife after his rejection of me. I looked at it and noticed some changes. Bisexual to heteroflexible despite him saying pansexual in person. I asked him about his FL profile and it's interesting that it's now changed after I had brought it up. What's not changed is his friendslist. All local women (some CDs) followed, friended, etc. His FB and IG was the same, mainly girl cosplayers. RICHARD all over again. Richard, the abusive, Richard who only cared about sex and used me for it, lying about love/relationship to use me for it, he too followed a bunch of women like Jamie but did it on his IG and tumblr. Liking their photos. Them in his feed. Couldn't be bothered liking my stuff. Why would I want a guy always looking at other women even online? No, it doesn't give me confidence. I am insecure. Me whose been cheated on. Me who has self esteem issues. I don't want a partner where his primary FL, IG, or tumblr feed is a bunch of sexual women. It's not reassuring to me. Doesn't make me feel special or none of these things. Richard and many before him didn't post me on social media at all. No one knew about us. I want a bf where we follow each other on social media. Where we post one another on our pages. Where we interact with each other on social media. Liking things, etc. A guy that doesn't hide me or us. Where it's not a bunch of women he's following or looking at on his feed. And I know Jamie, blame game Jamie, Jamie "well you did it too" will bring up my social media. My OF, saying a bunch of guys follow me and "well I don't see the difference." Something he said a lot when it came to him. I don't follow any of those guys. They don't show up on my feed. I show up on theirs. There is a difference. For a guy who claimed to be so different and not like my exes .... -Like Richard, follows all the sexual women accounts. -Like blame game Matt and Richard "you did it too, why can you but I can't", 'why should I say sorry/do something when you did so and so last year and didn't apologize despite you voicing that something I did hurt you today.' vs 'I acknowledge you don't/didn't like that and I will work on changing my behavior so that it doesn't upset you again. -Like Richard, all about the "sharing", bonding as he called it. But he should know what happened with Richard due to that. -Like Greg, the exposing, sharing and bonding as he calls it. The SCRUINTY as I call it, the pressure, the inundating, the bombarding. -Like Matt with the sexual preferences and the threat. -Like Mo, no reaction, praise, etc to my sexy photos. No emotion, possessiveness or even jealousy when I mentioned other things. Mo, who had no reaction because turns out, was using me and wasn't into black girls or attracted to me, as he later admitted. -Like Jorge, claimed he wanted me for a while, finally got me and then didn't want me because I didn't live up to the fantasy. -Like David with the inactions, the want of the girl but doing NOTHING about anything. Letting her go but missing her and wishing she'd reach out like he told me that one time after we got together. Did NOTHING about wanting/missing me. -Like Richard, decides to not want me when I voice not liking something vs accepting me for the differences. Triggering the fears, like abusive Richard where I'm afraid to be myself, speak my mind, voice things I don't want/like due to fear of another break up. -Like ALL of them, the letting me go, no effort, not worth fighting for, etc. the lack of reassurance. Never did he go "well what can I do to not trigger your anxieties, your past with them and show you I'm not like them as I say?" Granted EVERY time a guy says he's different and not like someone, he always is. Never did he do any of that. To me, doesn't seem like he was so "different" after all. Hasn't done anything "different." Ended up in the end, all like them, a guy that doesn't want me or kept me. And looking at his friends/follow list, just doesn't seem like a guy I want. Not a confidence booster seeing that. His comments on pages. His interactions. Makes me feel like he'd keep doing that stuff if he were my bf. What amazes me is he's read about my exes, about my past and did nothing to instill confidence, security or anything.