he/they, bi | 21 | a machine, probably 🔞mdni🔞 i really like lawrence oleander cluster B, baby!! (bpd w antisocial traits) never said i'm a good person, but at least i'm interesting! :D
His heavy hand pressed against my back until I was bent over the table.
Strade: Do you know know what this is?
MC: It's...a tablesaw.
Strade: Correct! :D
Strade: Well...It's a machine.
I felt a finger touch the back of my head.
Strade: I really love machines. Did I ever tell you that? >:)
The finger started drawing circles absent mindedly on the back of my skull.
MC: No, you didn't actually, you should tell me a lot more about it instead of-
He chuckled but his fingers also clasped the back of my neck.
Strade: I like to pull them apart and figure them out. But there's more to it than that...
His wistful tones felt so out of place, pushed against a motionless saw.
Strade: Machines are all made by people. For a purpose, a...ah...Intention!
He began to stroke my head like some kind of pet.
Strade: Mmm, I love to look for that intention. The reason people make what they make. Why they do what they do.
I didn't really know what he was trying to say, but I wasn't too eager for him to stop talking.
Strade: What do you feel when you look at that blade?
"Scared!"
He laughed.
Strade: Well, that's (totally) normal I guess! :D Not very good though, right? >:) Even if I wasn't about to turn it on and push you into it.
I stiffed, and a cold bead of sweat rolled down my back.
Strade: People think machines are ugly. More than ugly...Hmmm...Repulsive. People make the machines, but they don't want to look at them. I find that very interesting. But it does make some sense, doesn't it? >:) Intentions can be very ugly.
A click, a high pitched mechanical scream, and the saw came to life right in front of my face...
any video i have posted of me beating up my lawrence body pillow was done during a 2-month long possible psychotic episode LOL i do not remember anything from that time period and i wish i was joking. i was extremely unwell and was convinced that lawrence would become real and that he was the only one who understood me.
every now and then those posts get a few likes which im fine with but just know i was most likely experiencing psychosis during that time >_>
Cringe 18+ ASMR Boyfriend Roleplay / Moaning Audio but it's TPOF Fox. ^w^ Click the "keep reading" thingy to read the dumb little backstory I came up with for this audio and the script. ALSO! soundcloud might remove this track and ban me for this so DOWNLOAD it while you can lmao.
Fox makes a special recording for his favourite pet (that’s you.) The old man has recently had quite a set back, an agent working deep undercover for law enforcement was able to infiltrate his organization, no doubt relaying some very sensitive and confidential information back to his superiors. Thankfully for Fox though, the mole was found out and "dealt with" before he could penetrate too deeply into the real inner workings of Fox’s criminal empire but the very fact that this happened at all is deeply upsetting and disturbing to a man who once thought himself to be….meticulous. Furious at himself and unsure of what intel the agent leaked Fox became increasingly paranoid and took immediate and drastic measures to ensure that this could never happen again, conducting a ruthless campaign of "purging" several employees and completely reorganizing, uprooting and relocating his entire base of operations. Meanwhile, leaving you behind and completely in the dark about what was happening behind the curtain. Having spent many months in near total isolation at his remote compound with zero contact from Fox you suddenly receive a "care package" from him out of the blue with many of your favorite things and a small handwritten note. About a week after that you receive this recording…in it he apologizes for ghosting you, gives you a vague, rambling update about his situation (pets shouldn't know about "real life" things…) is goofy and cringe, sweet talks you, teases you, smells your old used panties, get's nastier and nastier and eventually…starts jorking it lol.
I actually wrote this one down on my phone: here's the exact script just kinda lazily pasted here, sorry if it's hard to read I wrote it down really fast. :)
Hello my Pet! …Miss me? First I’d like to apologize for abruptly cutting off all contact with you and leaving you in the dark like that. It was never my intention to do so, but I’m afraid it couldn’t be helped. I’ll spare you the sordid details but unfortunately my business has kept me especially…busy as of late and I’ve had to travel…quite extensively. This is actually the first time in many months I’ve had any time to myself! As you can no doubt see by my somewhat haggard appearance and less than luxurious (but thankfully very temporary) accommodations I’ve been burning the candle at both ends! But I—oh wait yes that’s right this is audio only isn’t it? How silly of me. Whoops! A boomer moment I suppose. Hahaha! Well…that’s alright. You have every inch of me seared into your brain already, don’t you? You can make do with hearing only my voice, can’t you? Mmmm~ But in all seriousness…I wanted to make this little recording for my favorite pet, to let them know that they’re still mine…no matter how far away I may be…and that…I still think about you every single day…and that I wish…I could have you here with me…you’d certainly be very good at relieving all this…stress I’ve been dealing with lately …I took…I took some of your panties with me when I left…the black lace kind…oh they reek of you…you wore these when…when….oh you remember…I’ve been rewatching the old stream vods of us together on my phone when I can too…but….sigh it’s not enough. I want the real thing. I want to really smell you again…I want to feel my claws dig deep into your thighs and tease your wounds with my tongue…I want to…taste you again…and I will sooner than later. I will. You will be packed up and personally delivered to me eventually…once things calm down…Like a present~ You’ve most certainly received the care package I had Rhino send…I hope you enjoyed it darling. Some of your usual favorites were very difficult to obtain in my current whereabouts, particularly the maple candies…but I managed. Anything for my pet. Undoubtedly you’re wearing the outfit as you listen to this…Oooh~ I can just picture how your ass fills out that short, tight, shiny latex skirt…nothing underneath of course…the black duct tape pasties over your nipples…that fishnet top…mmm those boot heels…and no doubt you’ve kept your hair short for me…just how I like it on you…ahhh and that lovely shiny black nail polish…and your make up…you were getting so good at it before I left, weren’t you? That smokey eye look mmmmm~ and to complete your look…your choke collar and leash of course…give it a good hard pull for me darling, won’t you?…ahhh I can hear so clearly… hear your choked little yelps…so cute~ so…inviting. You tempt me to do things my little pet…things that are…permanent….You make me want to lose control again…but no I’ve got to save it for you darling…I can’t spill a drop until we…reunite….I can’t say when that will be honey, but I’ll be able to have some one update you more often now that things are more secure, and I’ll make sure the compound is stocked with all of your favorites and not just the bare essentials…and maybe I’ll remember to turn the camera on next time so you can actually see me, haha. Goodbye for now my pet. I love you.
BTD Strade Murder Van / Strade Is A Serial Killer In The 1970s AU ideas.
a bunch of rambling below the cut
Takes place in the 1970s or maybe the late 1960s. Could also take place in the 80s and early 90s I suppose, but Strade would probably be able to get away with his crimes for longer in the 70s and late 60s.
Basic idea: Strade is a serial killer with a serious case of wanderlust who delights in traveling the vast, sprawling countries of Canada and the USA in his trusty van, always preferring to take the scenic routes, and lesser known byways to find small out of the way towns so he can discover the hidden charms and simple beauty of the people who live there. During his brief stay in these towns he will go out of his way to take in the local colour and experience everything these quaint little places have to offer (including their seedy underbellies), he'll strike up friendly conversations with the locals and learn where the best restaurants and bars are, taste the local food, drink the local brews, see landmarks unique to the area and generally seek out as many new experiences with as many new people as he can before hitting the open road once again, never staying in one place for too long and never knowing exactly where his next destination will be. But he doesn't leave empty handed of course, Strade always makes sure to take at least one Souvenir with him along for the ride and usually it's a terrified bound and gagged victim who never suspected the friendly stranger with the funny German accent could do something like this… but other times it's just a cheap little chachki like a fridge magnet or bottle opener. :D
Ren is his young traveling companion of course! Ren was hitchhiking up in nothern Canada somewhere, having run away from his abusive foster parents and Strade just happened to see him on the side of the road. Ren looked so vulnerable and down on his luck that Strade just couldn't resist giving him a lift. Unexpectedly Stade became endlessly obsessed with this young man and decided to "keep" him…forever. They've been traveling "buddies" ever since! So in this AU Ren has obviously still been kidnapped, horribly tortured, abused, raped, emotionally and psychologically manipulated, has terrible trauma related mental illnesses like Stockholm syndrome etc. but he takes a MUCH more active role in Strade's crimes and is his unwilling? but sometimes willing? (it's very complicated) accomplice. For example: Ren doesn't participate and will not participate in hurting, killing, torturing or raping Strade's "souvenirs" unless Strade forces him to, however Ren does purposely act as "bait" and will use his disarming short stature, handsome youthful appearance, and overtly cheerful nature to befriend people and introduce them to Strade knowing full well what might happen to them (But remember: Strade doesn't always kidnap/torture/kill people every time, he has to meet the right person or have a golden opportunity. For example; sometimes he'll just give hitchhikers a ride and let them off wherever they want to go, never knowing that had they interested Strade a bit more they might have been one of his victims…) Ren will even outright lie to people that he knows Stade will like with the promises of money, drugs, "a good time" or however he has to deceive, to get them to meet "his friend Strade." Ren also helps Strade dispose of the victim's bodies, which are "gotten rid of" in a variety of ways. I want the line of sympathy and compassion to be blurred for Ren, he is absolutely a victim, he does these things partly because some part of him knows if Strade has another victim with him, he won't be hurt as much, he does it also because he's been brainwashed and he's under the delusion that everything they're doing together is romantic somehow, that it's a rare type of love that few will ever know, etc. etc. But I think another part of him does get off on the fact that he finally has the power to control the destinies of other people by giving them to Strade, because in his own life he's never had any control over his own destiny, ever and he wants to feel powerful for once. And true power is of course power over other people. I also think there were a few times where Strade didn't actually have to force Ren to do anything to his victims, Ren took the lead without even being told to…or something like that! I'm just spitballin' here. But it should be horribly messy, sad, awful, filled with insoluble contradictions, tragedies and ruined lives.
Stade's Murder Van is a very common make and model but has a heavily modified interior in the back that's basically like his basement in cannon. It's soundproofed of course to muffle the cries and screams of his victims (Strade usually doesn't like gags that silence people, but will use them for practical purposes, he much prefers gags that hold people's mouths open.) He's got his special tools. He's got medical supplies to help his victims last longer. He's got cleaning supplies to clean up the inevitable mess. He has various custom made steel shackles, chains and collars that can be affixed to several points inside the van so he can bind and position his victims in any way he wants while they remain helpless. He has a custom made tri folding mattress / bed when he needs to sleep in the van or wants to get "intimate" with a victim or Ren, it's kinda cramped when it's all folded out and set up but Strade finds it very cozy! I imagine he has fake license plates and can make fake license plates to more easily blend into whatever state or province he happens to be in at the time, I think he'd also change up the paint job every couple of months to really throw off the law! Despite his attempts to make his van blend in to avoid notice by the cops he has an obnoxious and somewhat distinctive custom horn sound that sounds like this lol. Pretty obvious, but Strade is / was a mechanic by trade in this AU and can preform all of his own repairs too.
Strade loves to take polaroids in this AU! Since there's no camera phones, or digital cameras and film cameras are out of the question since he doesn't want these pictures to be seen by prying eyes! He considers himself an Amateur photographer and loves to take photos of nearly everything! Selfies, pictures of Ren when he's sleeping, landmarks, wildlife, monuments, pictures of a good restaurant meal, pictures of the sky, everything! He especially delights in taking pictures of his victims "before" "during" and "after" and takes great pleasure in showing off these photos to new "souvenirs" causing them great distress. He keeps them all in a locked briefcase. Maybe he sells some of these horrible photos to like underground snuff/gore/bondage/fetish magazines for some extra cash, since you know the deep web isn't a thing in the 1970s lol.
Where does Lawerence fit in? I dunno exactly. Maybe he was a potential victim. "The one that got away…" Maybe Ren convinced Strade not to turn him into a "souvenir" and they all just got high on weed together in the back of the Murder Van for a couple of hours lol. Maybe Law turned the tables and drugged them or kicked both their asses and stole a bunch of their shit and just left. I can't see Law joining them, he's too antisocial and would hate traveling, but I can see them meeting if only briefly. Maybe they're up really late at night and just cruising around in the van and see Law just laying in a cemetery all by himself. Ren thinks he's a ghost and tells Strade to keep driving, Strade laughs pulls over and tries to talk to him. Law just looks at him sighs and walks away disappearing into the shadows, never to be seen again. They both remember this encounter for the rest of their lives. :)
The only way I can see this AU ending is Ren shooting Strade in the head and turning himself into the cops, tearfully confessing to everything and getting put in prison for the rest of his life. ;))))
Okay that's all, sorry I haven't been recording stuff, I've had too much fun just reading short stories out loud to myself lately lol.