If we can drink drinks, can we food foods?
I will kill you until you die to death
They say I’m a rapist and a recluse. I’m here to tell you, I am not a recluse
Where is the specific ocean?
You’ll need to be more pacific
Don’t call them blackberries, call them African American berries. You need to be politically correct
Why does Waldo wear stripes
Because he doesn’t want to be spotted
What do you call a snobbish criminal walking down the stairs?
A condescending con descending
If two vegetarians have an argument, is it still considered beef?
Rhinos are just really buff unicorns
Did you sit on a pile of sugar? Cuz you’ve got a sweet ass
Roses are red, violets are blue, I’ve got a gun, now get in my fucking van!
MLG- Multiple Layers of Green (Shrek)
If your right leg is November and your left is December, can I come in between the holidays?
Let’s play a game, you’ll be McDonalds and I’ll be Burger King. I’ll do it my way and you’ll be loving it
If you are what you eat, then are cannibals the only true humans?
Call of Doge: Modern Wowfare
You know what you are, you’re ugly as Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium
Ebola pick-up line: When I first met you, my heart melted, then my liver, then my small intestines
Face Down, Ass Up That’s The Way I tie my shoes
The next sentence is a lie
The last sentence was the truth
On a scale of one to America, how free are you?
A masochist and a sadist are having sex, the masochist screams “Hurt Me!” The sadist grins evilly and says “No”
If I illegally download The Pirates of the Caribbean while on a pirate ship in the middle of the Caribbean, am I a PIirate of The Pirates of the Caribbean in the Caribbean?
I didn’t trip, I just body slammed the ground
prguitarman
stormborns
