violet the hag

current loves: FFXIV, Dragon Age, Hoyoverse games, cozy farming games, TTRPG nonsense and romance novels forever. probably older than you.

[violetcarlin]

about me

A couple of recent posts seem to have drawn more than a handful of non-bot followers, so hello! It’s probably time for a pinned post with some info that seems important to various parts of Tumblr.

Hi, I’m Jaime! I am Very Old in Tumblr terms - you’ll see me talking about my actual age if you stick around, but I don’t post my age in my bio, because random passers-by don’t need to know.

I live in the American Midwest, I’m queer, and I’ve got neurodivergencies/mental health issues that will occasionally come up in posts. 

I don’t automatically follow back. I learned a while ago that happiness is a manageably sized dashboard. 

I am extremely multifandom. Whatever you see posted here right now is subject to change on a whim. 

I write fanfic (when my brain allows), play video games and TTRPGs, and love many many things related to the SFF and romance genres.

I like a lot of things in my fanfic and other fanworks that others find distasteful. I have very, very few things I will judge you for liking in your fiction. 

If you’re not down with all varieties of queer - or the use of the word queer as a general community term - this is not a place for you. 

The ask box is always open - I may be slow to answer sometimes, because brain weasels, but I do love getting messages from folks! Feel free to introduce yourself, or just poke me if we’ve been mutuals for a while. 

That’s probably good for the basics. Thanks for following, I hope to get to know some of you!

[gentlewordsdaily]

There is a very specific kind of sadness in realizing your parents loved you, and still did not always know how to meet your emotional needs.

Because it is confusing. It would almost feel easier if there was no love there at all. But sometimes there was love. In the way they tried to protect you. In the sacrifices they made. In the ways they worried about you, cared for you, wanted a good life for you.

And at the same time, there were still things missing.

Maybe comfort did not come in the way you needed it to. Maybe your feelings were not always understood, or noticed, or handled gently. Maybe you learned to keep certain parts of yourself quiet because it felt easier than trying to explain them.

That kind of hurt is difficult because it does not always come from cruelty. Sometimes it comes from people who loved you deeply, but did not know how to emotionally connect in the ways you needed. People carrying their own wounds, limitations, fears, or ways of surviving.

And you are allowed to acknowledge both truths at once.

You are allowed to recognize their love and still grieve what you needed but did not receive. Those things do not cancel each other out.

Forgiveness, for a lot of people, is not pretending nothing hurt you. It is slowly accepting that someone can love you and still fall short of understanding you completely.

That does not make your pain dramatic. It does not make them monsters either. Sometimes it just means everyone was trying with the emotional tools they had, and some of those tools were not enough.

And I think many people quietly carry guilt for still feeling hurt by parents they know tried their best. But being loved imperfectly can still leave wounds. It makes sense that it affected you.

At the same time, you do not have to stay trapped only in anger forever either. Sometimes healing looks like understanding that your parents were human before they were parents. People shaped by their own experiences, their own upbringing, their own emotional gaps.

That understanding does not erase your feelings. It just softens the sharp edges around them a little.

You deserved emotional safety. You deserved gentleness. You deserved to feel understood, comforted, and emotionally close to the people raising you.

And if they could not fully give that to you, it is okay to mourn it.

But I hope you also know this: the love you needed is still something you can experience in your life. Through other people. Through chosen family. Through the way you learn to treat yourself now.

The story does not end at what you did or did not receive growing up.

You are still allowed softness after all of it 🤍

[pippinsqueaks]

She has the might of giants. She can fix him.

[beemot]

for @teiaweek2026 💎

[johnanderton]

CRITICAL ROLE Episode 4.27 | Complicated Questions

[emeships]

#WhatDatMean

[booty-uprooter]

do you prefer running dungeons for the first time with other players or npcs

other players

npcs

Remaining time: 3 days 15 hours

[screechfoxes]

CRITICAL ROLE 4.27 Complicated Questions

+ bonus Kattigan reaction:

[captainofthetidesbreath]

[traveler-of-light]

MISTER EORZIA 2.0 OUT OF THIS WORLD

Yesterday's winner was Hildi, I'm proud of poor little Asahi getting at least 5% though he's a piece of shit, I still love him 🤣

NOW, TODAY'S CONTENDERS JOIN THE FRAY ON TECHNICALITIES 🤣 BUT I'M THE ONE MAKING THE CONTEST SO YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT.

ON THE "TECHNICALLY HAS A HUMAN BODY" CATEGORY WE HAVE BEST BOI© AND BIG SOFTIE HIMSELF VARSHAHN

AND ON THE "TECHNICALLY IS NON BINARY AND I NEEDED SOMEONE TO MAKE THE LIST EVEN NUMBERS" THE RAY OF SUNSHINE, OUR BELOVED BRANCH... FEO UL

(yes if we do one with the girls they will be on that one too, don't worry)

WHO'S THE BEST BOI? technically

VARSHAHN

FEO UL

Voting ended onMay 30

[storybookhawke]

Affectionately, which is your least favorite major location in Dragon Age Inquisition?

Forbidden Oasis

Hissing Wastes

Fallow Mire

Exalted Plains

Storm Coast

Hinterlands

Western Approach

Emerald Graves

Crestwood

Emprise du Lion

Bald egg / results

Voting ended onJun 2

I don't even ask this to be critical/negative, I'm just curious what region do you go "ugh..." when you reach it while playing DAI?

[justjasper]

some of you have never taken the iron bull to look at dwarven ruins in the hissing waste and it shows

[nespyofire]

Some of you have never been in dwarven ruins in the Hissing Waste and it shows

[ladycrimsonandblack]

okay, so. according to the letter: "with any luck, the next time I see your face, we will have undone the damage of our first attempt. more than one door will be open to us from there."

and by itself this seems pretty mysterious but when you combine it with the knowledge about anchors we received on that nat 20, it becomes very suspicious. because thjazi meets mara the wing the day after the doors to the fearie are closed and is incandescently angry saying, and i quote, "then why wasn't it anchored? why wasn't it, mara? why wasn't it?" and then he caps it off by very obviously lying to thimble about a shipment from venatus.

and when you think about it more, mara the wing is the one character aside from house tachonis that we know can cross the boundary to the underworld. we know she was supposed to cross the boundary some time before thjazi's execution. and she needed an anchor for that ("and you said you can convince her to reshape it into an anchor... once it's done, the next step is to bring it to the field. our wings are leading a charge against the border to draw the locals away from the site.")

the doors of the fearie closed because the souls in the underworld overflowed. something mara the wing (notably the one person on thjazi's side able to cross into the underworld) was doing failed because there was no anchor, and it caused unknown damage thjazi was trying to fix up to the day he died.

thjazi didn't want thimble and mara to communicate.

did thjazi unintentionally close the door to the fearie and then kept that a secret from thimble for years??

[c6jpg]

#getinthefuckingrobot

[ashenmind]

“Living weapon” covers a lot and all of it is hot

[ashenmind]

[violetcarlin]

Thoughts on the latest episode of Critical Role c4 that are rolling around in my head tonight.

Obviously one of the larger threads in this campaign is how the concept of nobility and separated classes is bullshit and a constant invitation to strife. But while the machinations of the Tachonis and the Halovar and everyone else are good examples of that, I don't think there's any better, more stark example than Maya Davinos.

Because the thing is, she has a point, in the society they've been living in! To maintain power, the nobility must breed. Aranessa has failed Royce and their vassals in the way that noble society thinks matters. And given that all of the Sundered Houses are sorcerous bloodlines, there's something very real to be passed down from parent to child! And now Maya has lost a husband and is about to lose a daughter, and probably a son as well, and to her mind none of it would have happened if her liege hadn't been a romantic fool and had played the game properly.

But having a point inside the story doesn't mean she's right. In fact, her speech to Julien was Brennan telling us the main thesis the PCs are fighting against, at the core of it.

Because blood doesn't mean shit, outside of passing down magical ability. They want so desperately to believe that it makes them special, that it makes them better. Because without the Shapers, all they have is money and magic. So the Sundered Houses and their vassals do everything they can to hoard the money, the influence, to outlaw types of magic that might show the world that their blood is nothing special.

Everyone is supposed to stay in their boxes. The orcs were supposed to keep serving Azgra no matter how much pain he caused them. The commoners amongst the humans, elves, etc were supposed to accept that some of them might have to be given to Azgra to make things right. If the people at Castle Torch are all just as good, just as noble as Julien, then what does that say about the difference between them and the Davinos family. If there's no difference, then everything that the nobility has worked so hard to keep has meant nothing, and most of them will never be ready to realize that.

The only way the nobility keeps their power is by hoarding money/magic and continuing to produce children of their blood. Our PCs are fighting to prove that neither of those things mean jack shit, like all good revolutionaries. Julien could marry Ingrid or some other noblewoman and produce a kid like his mother wants, but that's not going to bring back the glory days she wants. And she's probably smart enough to know that, but she's also smart enough to know that doing so is the only way to hold onto even a sliver of the power they've had in the past. And the story Brennan and the players are telling - almost certainly, knowing what I know about them all - is the story of how all that power can mean nothing if the people you're holding down actually band together and rise up.

[gnomebutch]

there’s no such thing as tmi. let’s overshare together ❤️

pads

tampons

cup

birth control that stops periods

free bleeding

crumpled up toilet paper or whatever else works just shoved up there

gnome

Voting ended onMay 26

[violetcarlin]

So, due to my age and the things that happen to my hormones and reproductive organs at said age, I've been looking up a lot of menstrual period related question on the internet in recent months. You know, in that paranoid "this thing that's happening to me is vaguely normal, right?" way. (The answer thus far is 'yes,' and also, if there is a god somewhere out there who designed bodies and decided this was good enough, I would like to have a very strong word with them someday.)

Anyway. One of the things that I keep seeing are reddit posts and other comment sections in which people who have periods express incredulity at the common supposed fact that an average blood loss for one period cycle is 2-3 tablespoons (30-40 mL). And the comment section ALWAYS goes like this.

Person 1: Holy shit, that seems like so little, I've always bled more than that.

Person 2, a Well Akshually dipshit: You know that's not all blood, right? Most of it is tissue and stuff! You don't actually bleed more than 2-3 tablespoons!

Me and practically every other person with a uterus who reads this: IT ALL LOOKS LIKE AND COMES OUT AS BLOOD STOP BEING A FUCKING PEDANT. NOT A SINGLE PERSON CARES ABOUT THE BIOLOGICAL MAKEUP OF WHAT'S IN THE FUCKING TOILET RIGHT NOW, WE JUST WANT TO KNOW HOW MUCH OF THAT BULLSHIT IS NORMAL.

... and then I went and stared at a tablespoon for a moment and went "2-3 of these MY ASS."