lio

he/him 21 ........ intellectually and physically disabled level 3 autistic, combined adhd. wheelchair user aac user. language impairment semi verbal please be patient

[virtualfrog]

i got be honest hate that people love chloe hayden character so much not because of autism but because of her, all the damage she has done to the community only listening to lsn and being so rigid she doesnt even open to listen to other she just in her buble seems like her experience is the only one valid and dont get me wrong soo good there is a autistic female charcter but the community being all love for her gets me so angry because its only cause shes lsn. hate so much that autistic comunity hate on higher support or visibly autistic charcter only just because theyre mostly not played by autistic person themselves. but because chloes character is played by her, an autistic, you cant criticize, shes sudden perfect because is played by an autistic

but, if youre autistic you only know your autism, there are characters portrayed by allistic that are consultated by other autistics, diverse, not only one. hate so much people think were monolith.

[virtualfrog]

and there she goes AGAIN using functioning labels and saying shes nonverbal because of shutdown. AND NOW claiming shes actually high support needs when shes clearly Not she uses the "you cant tell someone support needs"(that is true but only to some point because yes you can tell when this someone is a public person like her) only to excuse being held accountable and being a hypocryte hate hate all the harm shes doing

[virtualfrog]

people who experience verbal loss stop saying it the same as language disorder impairment because no it not

[virtualfrog]

i got be honest hate that people love chloe hayden character so much not because of autism but because of her, all the damage she has done to the community only listening to lsn and being so rigid she doesnt even open to listen to other she just in her buble seems like her experience is the only one valid and dont get me wrong soo good there is a autistic female charcter but the community being all love for her gets me so angry because its only cause shes lsn. hate so much that autistic comunity hate on higher support or visibly autistic charcter only just because theyre mostly not played by autistic person themselves. but because chloes character is played by her, an autistic, you cant criticize, shes sudden perfect because is played by an autistic

but, if youre autistic you only know your autism, there are characters portrayed by allistic that are consultated by other autistics, diverse, not only one. hate so much people think were monolith.

[virtualfrog]

there are times where i think i see people only talk about intelectual disability when saying autism isnt intelectual disability and autistics arent ret*rds. thats the only time they mention us. its taboo. being visible as intelectual disabled solely relying on peoples openess to include us

[briarpatch-kids]

I really don't think a lot of abled and low support needs disabled people realize how many of us rely on the kindness of others to stay alive. Imagine if your entire survival and existence was pinned to being likeable enough.

[verdancy-hime]

Yes this is called capitalism.

Everyone's existence is pinned to being likeable enough.

[briarpatch-kids]

You don't understand, it's not about "oh i need my job." For a lot of severely disabled people it's "if I don't have friends and family willing to cook for me, shower me, dress me, literally wipe my ase for an indefinite period that could end up being my entire life, I will die." It's things like "I have zero income because I cannot work, disability is taking 5+ years to handle my case, and there's no family to rely on for help. If I can't get enough friends and total strangers to like me enough to give me rent money every single month, I will be homeless."

It's things like "I need to see specialists but my disability pays just enough to keep me from getting government assistance to GET to those appointments, if I can't find someone to drive me several times a week, I will die."

I had to rely on friends and family to do things like dress me, wash me, manage my VENTILATOR, and help me use the fucking toilet for almost two years while we waited for the VA to get their thumb out of their ass and decide that I had degenerated enough to NEED those things. If I wasn't married and didn't have a roommate, I would have died.

Its a little fucking different to just "capitalism means my able bodied ass needs to work if I want to eat." Capitalism is bad, but I'm talking about the unique challenges that disability causes ON TOP OF that

[kazsurvives-deactivated20250318]

I have schizophrenia - if I’m not likeable I’m dangerous.

If I’m dangerous then I need to be locked away in an institution. I get to exist outside in community even though I’m symptomatic because I’m seen as “nice”. If my parents get sick of caring for me - they would be allowed to send me away. If the people in the institution see me as dangerous they can drug me or physically restrain me.

And I am more privileged than others with my disorder because I’m small and white and fem presenting - so my existence is less of a threat. If I was POC or in a bigger body I wouldn’t even be afforded the little bit of grace I have now.

[briarpatch-kids]

I really don't think a lot of abled and low support needs disabled people realize how many of us rely on the kindness of others to stay alive. Imagine if your entire survival and existence was pinned to being likeable enough.

[virtualfrog]

new cat is making me extrenely overwhelmed i like her she is very sweet but my old cat is avoiding and is breaking my heart i miss her. know it can be temporary but im so overwhelmed icried for hours

[closet-keys]

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you let something slide because you were too shocked to react in the moment, you can bring it up the next time you talk to that person, you can text them, you can let them know it won’t slide again in the future. you don’t have to just accept that behavior indefinitely because you couldn’t gather your thoughts to say it made you uncomfortable when it first happened. you’re not making anything awkward, you are giving someone an opportunity to show care for you, and telling them you trust them enough to change their behavior. there is literally nothing wrong or bad with voicing discomfort even if the moment has already passed.

[librarycards]

@snoopyisbisexual: #tbf you are making it awkward but so did they you are even + it is worth it

This is SO IMPORTANT and speaks to the political role of what feminist philosopher Sara Ahmed calls the “killjoy” — an interlocutor who introduces necessary friction to the normative functions of oppression by, in essence, Making it Weird.

Not laughing at the racist joke. Not letting ‘little comments’ slide. Being a humorless feminist. Being a cunt. Holding a grudge. Complaining. Insisting. Holding up the works.

This is and long has been a crucial form of noncompliance in a world obsessed with maintaining oppressive structures through, among other things, carceral norms of politeness, decorum, and subservience. The killjoy disrupts the flow of violent norms & reification of “commonsense” discourses that harm and marginalize people by Making It A Thing: forcing people - esp those with relative privilege - to truly look at inconvenient truths.

And: Not to be all “now more than ever,” but like. It’s really really important right now not only not to obey in advance, but to create obstacles to collective passivity. Kill the sick joy that comes with compliance.

[psychotic-gerard]

the thing about disability is it really does sometimes boil down to "wow i wish i could do that" and then you can't. and it sucks.

[psychotic-gerard]

accomodations are important but i think they miss the point of this post. sometimes you can't do it. at all. someone needs to do it for you or it will never happen.

[psychotic-gerard]

"and then you force yourself anyway" folks im starting to think some of you really do not understand what it means to not be able to do things.

[virtualfrog]

hate u hate u autistic asperger supremacist who think are better to autistic who need full support hate u hate u for participating in bullying peiple like me hate u hate u for saying youre a community hate u for not including my caregivers hate u for excluding hate u for pretending people like me dont try hard enough hate u for acting like being like me is moral fail someting to me ashamed of. hate u for being so fucking cruel to autistic people like me with intellectual disability thatsone of the readons we not on internet hate hate hate u. you all are fucking cruel and contribute to ereasing people like us.

had autistic people today saying autistic people "arent fucking doors dumb people" and acting like that isnt fucking ableism and arent talking about people who need support in basic things. no i cant eat alone by myself, no i cant bath myself, no i cant go out alone by myself, yes im in internet talking about it because like u i have abilities but also impairments and technology helps being able to write to use internet, assistive technology is a thing and some of us can! so fuckih tired of you autistic gifted people without intellectual disability no cognitive impairment actig like autism begins and enda with you all. leave us the fuckig alone.

when it is convenient you wsnt to be called disabled, no wait, most of the time ypu all just want to be called neurodivergent nerodiverze neurospicy because autism for you is just a different way of thinking it doesnt cause impairment right /sarcasm

so fucking sick of you all being cruel so fucking mean excluding high support needs severe autistic severe disabled people HATE u all forever

[virtualfrog]

please. sometimes it feels like a big joke when "gifted" people talk about themselves oh when they compate being fuckig like them to the suffering of intellectual disability and learnig disabilities. it feels like a big huge joke. its so annoying

[virtualfrog]

hope so many people stop misusing terms like autism regression a rare thing, like catatonia, not a thing to self diagnose. when referring to most likely burnout/ temporary loss of skills. is possible for a msn to regress to hsn lv2 regress to if theyre already been lv3 in the past. and even if not been lv3, its different and more likely temporary because thats not how acqueing losing skills work. not likely a lv1 become lv3, no, thats not how it works youcant be lsn then hsn in very short time thats Not how it works.

[virtualfrog]

there thing dont see people talk often in autistic community is those who hyperfixate on real people (friends/partners/siblings...) but in the side of the person whos the hyperfixation. had a lot of friends people hyperfixate in me and most of the time they dont realize they are breaking boundsries, being too invasive, had lot of people who hyperfixated on me who started taking my personality as theirs, understand most of those times those autistics are trying to interact, but lot of times it started becaming stalking. autistic people can not realize those things sometimes and not realizing they are being "innapropriate" in those situations that can become toxic is a thing that should be adressed and worked through. just because something is caused/influencied by a disability/condition/disorder doesnt mean it shouldnt be adressed and worked to get better ..

[noccolibroccoli]

So I had a hysterectomy today (hooray!) and I brought along my stuffed orca, Shamu, as a comfort object. And everyone i interacted with during my pre-op was like "Oh! Who's this?" so I was telling them all about him, how he's been with me since I was 9 and gone on every single vacation and road trip, and they were telling me about their own stuffed buddies (one lady said she still has hers after 40 years!) and all of this while I was signing consent forms and providing a list of the things I'd brought with me, you know, small talk.

So then a nurse comes over and goes "Okay, I've got some stickers I'll put on your things so we know they're yours" and I'm like "OK cool" so she puts a sticker on my coat and stickers on my bags of clothes and then she turns to Shamu and I'm like "oh I guess he gets a sticker too"

But no. She pulls out a hospital bracelet that's an exact copy of mine and slaps it on his tail, like so:

And i was delighted by this, so I took a picture to send to my friends, who were equally delighted, and were cracking me up with their reactions (like so:)

Anyway, they take me back and put me under, and when I awake groggily a few hours later it takes me a minute to get my bearings, so I don't notice Shamu at first. But then I realize he's tucked up next to me in the gurney, so I grab him, and my hand touches gauze.

And I'm like "huh?" so I look at him and I realize

They gave my fucking orca a hysterectomy

[virtualfrog]

makes me mad autistic people without intellectual disability trying make seem cognitive impairment from id is most same thing from autism vice versa. not its not. autism is not intellectual disability. not the same. not almost the same. not like the same. cogntive impairment from someone without intellectual disability not the same from someone with id. not the same.

[virtualfrog]

no want to rivalize (?) conditions but makes me so mad people trying make seem they experienxes like us when actually dont have id. not near the same. both struggle both hard but not the same. mad autistic people derailing posts experiences directed exclusive to id people. let us have our own space

[virtualfrog]

makes me mad autistic people without intellectual disability trying make seem cognitive impairment from id is most same thing from autism vice versa. not its not. autism is not intellectual disability. not the same. not almost the same. not like the same. cogntive impairment from someone without intellectual disability not the same from someone with id. not the same.

[virtualfrog]

when talking searching about regression abilities what i see is mostly people experencing burnout temporary ability drain that mostly improves with intervention and proper rest. not wantig fakeclaim not what i want to, but most see people talking about experiences that not what it means. when i search is mostly people experiecing from long shutdown burnout not actually regressing abilities where you cant remember fixate steps body doesnt seem to know anymore how to do things catathonic like. mostly see people who in overwhelm burnout. people who long time without suppoet now are in burnout. people who are in masking burnout. both need support and help but not the same. experiencing temporary ability loss from crisis not the same as regressing abilities.