style/stīl/ noun: a manner of doing something

[wehaveourown]

I’m calling this my ready for that new new face. #HappyNewYear 🎊 Do not remember the former things, Nor consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing, Now it shall spring forth; Shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness And rivers in the desert. ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭43:18-19‬ (at New York, New York)

[wehaveourown]

Grateful for my little white Christmas. Super grateful for friends that become family on a Christmas spent oceans away from home. But more than anything, I’m grateful for the reason for the season, the greatest love story ever told & the defender of my heart. Thank you baby Jesus. ❤️ #MerryChristmas to everyone & their loved ones! (at Waterville Valley Resort)

[wehaveourown]

Captured by a fave whilst trying to woo summer back with some shoulder action & full crooked smiles. ( 📷 @msjafta: so excited to share this city with you & all the adventures to come ❤️) #NYC & #melanin (at New York, New York)

[wehaveourown]

It's a curious thing to stand as witness to love, With legs firmly planted on a foundation of shared smiles & giggles Intertwined fingers & hearts & purpose in God To say, without speaking, I entrust this heart that I hold so dearly close to mine as sister & friend into your hands & care until death do you part That you may be gentle & kind & love her as Christ loves His church, His bride That I pray with you always; "Because God created this organic union of the two sexes, no one should desecrate His art by cutting them apart." Mark‬ ‭10:9‬ So no one will desecrate His art by cutting you apart. Because surely, art painted with the finger of God is perfect. Also, surround yourself with women bathed in melanin whom you greatly admire. ❤️ #WCW & an early #TBT #Melanin #BlackGirlMagic #BlackLove #AfricanLove

[wehaveourown]

Take me back to that time we dared to defy TLC & chased waterfalls. I'm thinking ladies who chase waterfalls together, stay together. I'm grateful for these two beautiful #Hotlanta babes with brains. #WCW ❤️ #Yosemite #adventure #takemeback (at Yosemite National Park)

[wehaveourown]

Thinking out loud...

I haven’t blogged or even thought about blogging for years. & simultaneously, I haven’t been myself for years. I’m trying to change that, for both.

Lately, happiness, and therefore purpose, passion & work/job have been on my mind constantly. What is happiness & how does one go about choosing it or attaining it? My brain then moves to career, to purpose & to work or job when this thought enters my head the many times a day it does. I started this blog mainly probably because someone suggested I start it. I constantly get compliments on the way I dress, the way I put clothes and a look together. Even on the days when in my head I am dressing casual and I haven’t put much effort in what I am wearing, I will still get a compliment on how amazing I look. (This may be due to my cousin’s teaching of: “You can never be overdressed.” Wise woman.) 

Getting dressed & putting a look together is one of the most natural processes for me. It excites me, it makes everything else in the world irrelevant for that one moment when I look in the mirror & give myself that nod and smile of approval. It’s not labour or work for me. This makes me wonder if this is how careers are born. & if it is, then I am completely in the wrong career.

& on the other side, I love people. I love caring for people. I love caring for people in the most craziest of ways in that I care about your soul, your heart & whether you’re allowing love & goodness into it because you should. This makes me wonder about my love for fashion, for clothes and whether I could completely be consumed by a world that in essence is all about the outside, about appearances, that can sometimes exclude. & then I think about my friend who once told me people like me are necessary in those spaces. & maybe my view of fashion is limited and there is heart & soul in it. Or maybe I can be the one to inject heart & soul in it. Nothing is impossible, right?

I studied accounting and am a consultant in this area that I studied. There has never been any moment of the work that I’ve been doing for the past 5 years that has given me any ounce of joy. Simply put, my mother chose this path for me, or at least instilled the fear in me if I didn’t choose this path. I was good at maths & numbers & so I charged on. I use to cry in the shower in the mornings on my way to class. I have the urge to have conversations with my colleagues and bosses about the insignificance and pure utter boredom of the work we do everyday. It’s not a life and I don’t know how I’ve sustained this for nearly a decade. (Scratch that, God has sustained me for nearly a decade.) But as a  Bible believing, Jesus Christ died on the cross for my sins and all sins and rose again after three days believing and God is Love believing woman, I know God hasn’t promised to merely sustain us. He’s promised us joy & abundance. This may be a cry for help. I’m naively hoping it’s the start of something. A start of watering the ideas, the visions, the creativity that I have ignored, & completely rejected within me. Because of fear. It’s time I started rejecting fear instead. 

Sorry for the long, confusing thinking out loud post. Please bear with me.

[wehaveourown]

Let’s start this again. It’s never too late to start.

[wehaveourown]

I'm probably not going to go to the gym with you or entering some crazy race but ask me to climb a mountain or volcano with you or jump off a cliff or plane or bridge & I'll be there! I thank God he made me adventurous! Oh, & cute too! 😉 #Yosemite has my heart. ❤️ #sunkissed #melanin #adventurelover (at Nevada Fall)

[wehaveourown]

This day will always be one of my most special days. The day my first soulmate came into my life. ❤ I don't know anyone who has had to fight as much as this beautiful human has simply for a space in this world to be herself. & I don't know any heart as brave & equipped to rise again, after every battle, as more strong, magical & true to who she is, no matter what you may say or think. I am always here, forever ready to rally with you against anyone & anything that is trying to make you doubt what God has so purposefully & delicately moulded together as the majestic soul you are. Thank you for the most truest of loves. #HappyBirthday to the fire to my soul. Ours is of eternity. ❤

[wehaveourown]

#Washington provided the views & the backdrop & I was feeling myself, short hair & all. #LatePost #LincolnMemorial #sunkissed #melaninmagic #DontTouchMyHair (at Lincoln Memorial Monument)

[wehaveourown]

Mr & Mrs Cook. ❤ (& soon to be Dr Cook & Dr Khuzwayo) #Love #melaninmagic #Xhosa #English (at Cape Town, South Africa)

[thedamigrace]

I don’t care about validation and recognition from any society that demeans who I am and you shouldn’t too!

[wehaveourown]

"She rested her head against his and felt, for the first time, what she would often feel with him: a self-affection. He made her like herself. With him, she was at ease; her skin felt as though it was her right size." Why did it take me so long to delve into this magic?! 😭 A tale of love and race. Such an important, powerful & necessary tale. I could go on & on about this book & this woman! #BlackGirlMagic #Americanah #BlackLove

[wehaveourown]

#WCW: My favourite human of all time; serving. She stays permanently in a state of #slay. #Sister #MrsCook #LookAtAllThatBody #ButYouCantTouch #melaninpoppin #melaninmagic #WCE #HerConfidenceIsTheBestPart

[wehaveourown]

And we did as the Americans do as they lit up the sky. #4thOfJuly 🎉 (at Brooklyn Bridge Park)

[wehaveourown]

💔 #Orlando

[wehaveourown]

It's not my actual birthday but, look, it's still my birthday month okay! Celebrations are not about to cease anytime soon! This is very late, but I have to thank all my loves for the messages, calls, Facebook posts & all that good stuff. I could never fully express what it means to me that you celebrate my existence. I love you, you're magical. This life is a beautiful gift. ❤ #Love #IFinallyMetLadyLiberty #Champagne #Birthday (at New York, Statue of Liberty)