[wh3nd01want1t]

violenttradwife on Instagram

[wh3nd01want1t]

having another white boy why moment

I have slim feelings on ever finding a husband

I think I would like to marry based on compatability and not just feelings

marrying on feelings is futile

how do i talk about that to someone?

I joke about scaring the hoes, but in reality I am scared to lose something I've built even a little bit. I get attached. I shouldn't get attached like that. It gets my hopes up.

should I stay nonchalant and not get attached until my wedding day? just like how I should wait for intimacy until marriage. wouldn't that make me OP.

ultimately marrying based on compatability would be the most logical, but the hopeless romantic in me wants to feel desired and cherished and sought after. I can learn to love, that's ok for me. But can he? Whoever he is. Wherever he is. Whoever he's with rn. Who is he that is meant for me? Where is he and when will I meet him and when will I know?

I yearn for man to cling to so very badly. A man to share marriage and children with. A man who will back me up and I can comfort him with my cooking. A man who will let me stay at home more often. A man who will appreciate my skills and my mind. A man who will love me as Christ loved the church. A man who will respond appropriately to my emotional times. A man who will pray for me and with me. A man who tries to understand me. A man who enjoys my singing, too.

I guess this shows that I want a well rounded man who will love me truly and who is compatible with me not just in interests but emotionally as well.

ugh. this is so frustrating. i want to cry. i want to cry to the man that is meant for me and tell him how hard it is to wait for him to come around. I'll be crying only in front of God for now, as He watches the tears roll down my soul.

another thing is thay I can't go based off feeling of who I know that should be the one for me bc I like different qualities of each of them and they all feel a different kind of good. I wish I could rely on my own feelings better. I wish I could feel out the answer to life's biggest questions like this better. I can't trust my own faulty heart or brain. I can only truly have faith in what God has planned for me bc I can't predict or feel out the future. Only God knows who this man is, where he's at, and when he'll come. I hope it's one of the easiest decisions of my life. If it's God-ordained, then it must be, right? God makes some things surprisingly easy. Thank Him for this grace and sovereignty.

[wh3nd01want1t]

Dear God,

Thank you for the beauty of a winter forest at night. One of my favorite experiences.

Yours,

Emily

[rathayibacter]

that pistachio completely sealed in its shell is scared and alone, like a miner trapped by rubble. you need to free it by any means necessary. get the gun from your dad's cabinet

[whattt07]

[wh3nd01want1t]

[wh3nd01want1t]

this is the background of a flyer I made for a friend's party some months ago. Phone photoshop kinda sucks, but it's a Godsend

[meltypen]

[wh3nd01want1t]

"I love you, but I don't want to be friends with you."

alright.

[wh3nd01want1t]

cut

coke

i miss her

can't sleep

see you soon

[ronaldmcdonaldinthehouse]

Not what I had imagined in my head but yeah I'll make a better one next time 😺😺😺

[wh3nd01want1t]

"She thinks she's a lap dog."

I wish I looked this cute while being this pathetic. I wish I was small enough to be held again. I need it. I need it. I need it.

[wh3nd01want1t]

and I wish that you could see how you make me feel to this very day.

[wh3nd01want1t]

every time I want to quit vaping he fucking stresses me out again. when will he stop, cuz I need to quit. I can't drink right now, so I have to vape. wtf.

[wh3nd01want1t]

[wh3nd01want1t]

[mecha-frankenstein]

Funeral Barbie diorama by Paolo Schmidlin. From his collection of vintage Barbies, part ofthe "Barbie Around the World" exhibit at the Barbara Frigerio in Italy