⋆ she/they ★ chaos itself ★ istp ⋆ addicted to coffee ★ mostly riordanverse but I do lot of yapping too ⋆ valgrace...... ★ banner by shuweicaolu ⋆ pfp by cupidisahoe
stop feeding me with your incredible fics I'm going to be addicted
You know how if sharks stop swimming, they'll drown? That's me with writing about these two stupid boys smooching. Anyway, for my next trick, have a college AU fic!
For @valgraceweek Day 3 (shh yes I know it's late): The Test Drive Trap
“Ugh. I guess this means I should probably go ask him out.”
“Probably, yeah,” Leo agreed. “Like, if you told him you don’t like being asked out, he’s way too noble to do it anyway.” Piper still looked like she was being asked to walk the plank, so Leo cut in. “Look, why don’t I take him on a test drive?”
Piper blinked at him. “What? You’re gonna date him instead? Be my guest.”
“No, I’m not going to date him,” Leo said, rolling his eyes. “I’m just gonna… put him through his paces. I’ll tell him it’s a test and we’ll see if he really has what it takes to be the boyfriend we think he is. That way if he is mid, you don’t have to waste your time with him.”
“But you’re okay with wasting your own time?” Piper asked. “You’re willing to just date him without all the gross kissing benefits?”
“I think I’ll survive being on the receiving end of Jason Grace’s attention for a few months, even if we don’t have the ‘gross kissing benefits’” Leo soothed. “Besides, if it sucks, I can bail. I’m just testing to see if he’s worth your time and effort. If he proves he’s not, I have no reason to stick around.”
***
VGW 2026: Accidentally Dating/Trap/Venerate
In all of his years of living, Leo Valdez had never fucked up quite like this. Sure, he’d fucked up plenty of times in his life, no one on the planet would argue that, but this time he’d managed to screw the pooch in a way that would have dog breeders scratching their heads in confusion for generations to come. Or something.
The thing was that it started out innocently. With pure intentions, even. Three months ago, he’d been hanging out in the university library, waiting for Piper to get out of her statistics class so he could do her homework in exchange for her dad’s credit card to buy an obscenely large milkshake from the Student Union when he overheard something that made his skin crawl.
“Yeah, so, apparently he’s got a crush on Piper,” one girl said casually from the other side of a bookshelf. Leo immediately went still, and peered through the books to find two people sitting on the floor, surrounded by textbooks and swapping notes back and forth. “I mean, that’s what I heard, anyway.”
Her friend raised their eyebrows. “Yeah? He said that?”
“I mean, he didn’t exactly say anything specific. You know how he is,” the girl dismissed waving her hand through the air. “But the description is ‘brown hair, brown eyes, and chaotic energy,’ plus he shares a class with them. It’s bound to be her.”
“Qick question: Is this information third or fourth hand?”
The girl squealed in mock outrage and threw a wad of paper at her friend. “How dare you insinuate my gossip might not be legit? This is about Jason Grace having a crush. You think I’m just gonna flub those details?”
“I don’t think that the details are wrong, per se, but I know that your desire to get the gist and run with it is legendary.”
Leo quit listening and crept out of the library after that. He’d heard more than enough to make his stomach churn. He knew that Piper hated when people talked about her love life. Really, she hated being talked about in general by people who didn’t know her personally, but romance had always, always been a touchy subject for her. People being interested was infinitely worse. Even when they were in middle school and everyone else was giggling while doodling hearts with their initials, Piper’s face turned a little green when it was brought to her attention that someone had a crush on her.
Not that it stopped the boys in their school, though. She’d tried to mitigate it as much as possible with baggy clothes and the worst haircut imaginable, but nothing really helped. The problem was that she was just naturally, inherently beautiful in a way that was difficult to hide, and at twelve, she’d developed early in a way that was even more difficult to hide. Besides, even if that weren’t the case, she still wouldn’t have been safe because it eventually got out that being confessed to made Piper squirm, and being friends with high school Leo was a one-way ticket to getting bullied.
But Jason Grace wasn’t a high school bully. There was a reason that girl had been obsessed with the idea of Jason having a crush on somebody, and that was because everybody, everybody wanted to be the object of Jason’s affection. Jason was tall and broad shouldered with puppy-soft blond hair and puppy-softer blue eyes that sparkled behind the exact pair of gold wire-framed glasses every Sexy History Professor Fantasy wore. Much like Piper, he was gorgeous in that casual, effortless, undeniable kind of way that caught way more eyes than it would have if he’d been trying at all. But more than that, Jason was just… sweet. He said please and thank you to every last one of the staff in the cafeteria, he offered his umbrella to anyone who accidentally forgot theirs, and any time he was hanging out in the quad, the stray cats who lived on campus would come sauntering up for a communal sunning session like he was some kind of Disney Princess. Jason Grace was perfect.
Which is why Leo approached the subject of his crush on Piper with the utmost caution. Things had obviously petered out from high school levels, but Piper still wasn’t popular, and assholes still enjoyed making her uncomfortable. If she had a boyfriend, especially a boyfriend like Jason, she’d never have to worry about that again. Leo could stop sitting there helplessly and watch her tense up every time some guy with a smirk swaggered towards them. They could finally, for the first time in nearly a decade, relax.
If Piper was willing to play ball.
“So, I, uh, heard something interesting today,” Leo said later when he was almost done with the milkshake he’d paid for with math. “Something you’re… probably not gonna like, if I’m being honest.”
Piper went very still, then looked at him carefully, froyo paused halfway to her mouth. “What did you hear?”
“Apparently, someone has a crush on you, like, a real one,” he reported with a wince.
“Fantastic,” Piper muttered darkly, rolling her eyes. “Who is it this time?”
“Jason Grace.”
Piper’s head whipped around and she looked like she’d been fully betrayed. “What? Him? But I’ve talked to him. He knows I hate that junk, why would he do this?”
“I don’t think he’d actually say anything,” Leo defended. “I mean, he didn’t even technically say it was you. He just said it was a brown haired, brown eyed chaos gremlin.”
“Then it might not be me at all,” Piper pointed out, her voice bright with hope.
“Literally who else would it be? We don’t go to a very big school, remember?”
“I mean, you share a class with him.”
“Yeah, alright. Sure. Jason Grace has a crush on me,” Leo scoffed. Then he sighed. “Look, the only reason I bring it up is because you talked about just getting a boyfriend and getting it over with. Remember that?”
“Yeah…”
“You have to admit that Jason Grace would be a pretty damn perfect boyfriend,” Leo pointed out. “I mean, I know you think boys have cooties, but come on. This is an elite level man we’re talking about.”
“No, that’s fair,” Piper conceded. “Like, there are way worse boyfriends out there.”
“Yeah!”
“I mean, I could be dating you.”
“Yeah, that would– Hey!” Leo scowled at Piper, who was snickering into her frozen yogurt. “You’re the worst. You know that?”
“I’ve been told,” she said blithely. Then she frowned and rested her chin on her palm. “Ugh. I guess this means I should probably go ask him out.”
“Probably, yeah,” Leo agreed. “Like, if you told him you don’t like being asked out, he’s way too noble to do it anyway.” Piper still looked like she was being asked to walk the plank, so Leo cut in. “Look, why don’t I take him on a test drive?”
Piper blinked at him. “What? You’re gonna date him instead? Be my guest.”
“No, I’m not going to date him,” Leo said, rolling his eyes. “I’m just gonna… put him through his paces. I’ll tell him it’s a test and we’ll see if he really has what it takes to be the boyfriend we think he is. That way if he is mid, you don’t have to waste your time with him.”
“But you’re okay with wasting your own time?” Piper asked. “You’re willing to just date him without all the gross kissing benefits?”
“I think I’ll survive being on the receiving end of Jason Grace’s attention for a few months, even if we don’t have the ‘gross kissing benefits’” Leo soothed. “Besides, if it sucks, I can bail. I’m just testing to see if he’s worth your time and effort. If he proves he’s not, I have no reason to stick around.”
“I guess that’s reasonable,” Piper hummed. She cocked her head to the side. “You’re really alright with doing all this?”
Leo grabbed her hand with a grin. “You’re my best friend, Piper. Not to be embarrassing, but there’s a lot of shitty stuff I’d be alright with doing for you, and this doesn’t even make that list.”
Piper laughed brightly, and Leo knew he’d done the right thing.
The next day, Leo hunted Jason down, cornering him after their shared German class. “Hey, Jason, can I talk to you?”
Leo sort of expected Jaosn to say no, or at least look a bit put upon, but none of that happened. Instead, his cheeks went pink and he sputtered. “Oh! Uh, hi, Leo. Yes, we can talk, sure! What do you need?”
Leo’s eyebrows shot up, unaware that Jason Grace knew who he was. It made sense, though, in a way. Everyone on campus knew that he and Piper were a matched set, if you wanted one, you were getting both. Jason was probably just nice enough to not mind the inherent third wheel.Or he was trying to shmooze with the bridge troll to get to the princess.
“Do you think we can go somewhere private?” Leo asked, glancing around the still-crowded room. “I kinda heard some semi-sensitive information that I don’t necessarily want in the rumor mill again.”
“Right, yeah, sure,” Jason said, nodding like a bobblehead in a tornado. “Um, there’s a courtyard between here and the archeology building. It’s usually pretty dead around this time. Would that work?”
“Uh, yeah, actually, that’d be great,” Leo said, once again a little startled by the eager agreement. “Lead the way, Superman.”
Jason glanced down and saw the bright red S on his shirt and changed his cheeks to match. “I– My sister got me this for my birthday. I don’t even like comics that much.”
Leo just laughed brightly and playfully kicked Jason’s shoe to gently remind him he was still sitting, which, of course, made Jason scramble to his feet. “Nah, it suits you. You’re stuck with the name now, Superman.”
“Uh, okay,” Jason stammered, still flushed. “Anyway, um, follow me?”
Jason led them outside and around the corner of two separate buildings, then through to the middle of a third and into a little mostly cement outdoor area that would only be called a courtyard by the kindest of people. By the time they got there, Jason was still perfect, but Leo was wheezing.
“God damn, I really need to focus on cardio some more,” he panted, stretching his arms up above his head in a desperate attempt to catch his breath. “I mean, I can sprint just fine, but I have basically zero staying power at that speed.”
“I’m sorry,” Jason fretted. “I shouldn’t have–”
“Don’t worry about it,” Leo cut in. “I’ve seen your friend group, you probably haven’t hung out with someone 5’3 since fifth grade. You giants just forget your freaky long legs give you a speed advantage.”
“Still though. I should have–”
Leo interrupted him again. “How about next time you’re walking too fast, I pop out my tactical Heeleys and just hang on for the ride?”
Jason looked startled for a moment before he let out a bright laugh. It wasn’t quite as nice as Piper’s but it still made Leo’s chest a little fuzzy. “I– Yeah, I guess that works. Do you own tactical Heeleys?”
“I mean, not yet, but give me ten minutes in the engineering lab, and I can whip you up a prototype no problem.”
Jason just chuckled and shook his head, looking at Leo fondly. “So, what did you want to talk about?”
For a second, Leo’s mind went blank. What did he want to talk about? Was there a reason aside from just enjoying the other dude’s company? Then he suddenly remembered. “Right! So, I overheard some very interesting gossip about a crush a certain someone in this courtyard might or might not have.”
Jason went totally still, eyes wide and a little frantic. “Who told you?”
“Nobody told me, I just overheard it,” Leo soothed. “And don’t freak out yet, I talked to Piper and we’re fine with it.”
Jason’s soul looked like it was leaving his body. “You told Piper? Why?”
“Because I tell her everything, duh,” Leo scoffed. “You’re really gonna have to get that sorted if you want this relationship to work.”
“Relationship?” Jason echoed, his eyes round and shiny like new coins.
“Yeah. Not right off the rip, though,” Leo warned. “You’re getting tested first, alright? I’m gonna put you through your paces and see what kind of boyfriend you actually are. You do well enough in the prelims, you get to have the real deal. Sound fair?”
Jason looked confused but desperate enough to nod anyway. “Alright. If you say so.”
“Awesome,” Leo grinned. Then he offered his arm. “Your first boyfriend task is getting me the hell out of here. I was not paying enough attention on the way in, apparently.”
Jason laughed again as he looped his arm through Leo’s, leading him back out to civilization. The laugh was nice, a bright, quiet sound that Leo decided he really liked, and as they stepped out into the sun together, Leo kind of thought that he had done the right thing.
Only, that had been three months ago, and now Leo was realizing that he hadn’t done the right thing, he’d completely fucked up. He shouldn’t have eavesdropped in the library, he shouldn’t have told Piper what he heard, he shouldn’t have schemed, and he definitely shouldn’t have agreed to vet Jason Grace to find out if he was as perfect as they thought. Because, much to Leo’s slowly-growing horror, Jason Grace wasn’t perfect.
He was so much better.
As it turned out, Jason Grace wasn’t actually the venerated Greek god everyone on campus made him out to be. No, he was completely and totally human. Messily human. He was human in that way that made him wildly indecisive when it came to pizza toppings, despite the fact that he got pretty much the exact same thing every time. Human in the way that meant he would miss a joke in a movie, then laugh out loud twenty minutes after the credits rolled because he finally understood. Human in the way that meant he held Leo’s hand throughout the whole museum, babbling excitedly the whole time about archeology, even when anyone else would have picked up on the fact that everything he said was going straight over Leo’s head. Human in the way that meant messy hair after surprise naps and absently coloring his fingernails with Sharpie when he was stuck on hold and wearing two different socks because it was laundry day and eating dirt in a parking lot while Leo cackled because this 6’2 specimen of a man could not hold his liquor.
Human in the way that Leo couldn’t help but fall in completely and totally love with.
Which was a problem. Leo wasn’t meant to fall in love with Jason. Jason was in love with Piper and Piper was– Well, she wasn’t in love, but she was braced and would benefit from the arrangement, and might even wind up liking it. Leo was not meant to ruin that, especially not now that he actually cared about Jason. He wasn’t Piper, of course, but in three lousy months he’d managed to become Leo’s favorite non-Piper person. So yeah. Leo couldn’t ruin Piper’s best shot at being left alone by making Jason feel too awkward to hang out with either of them just because Leo’s stupid feelings hadn’t bothered to read the mission briefing.
But at the same time, he couldn’t keep it a secret. The idea of telling Jason terrified him, more than anything, but the thought of keeping this secret was unbearable in the worst ways. Jason deserved to know. He deserved to know that the little weirdo he’d been saddled with for two months had gone and made everything complicated for no reason, that he’d completely and totally fucked up. That the bridge troll had decided to toss his hat into the ring with the princess’s. It was going to ruin… everything, but it had to be done. Leo couldn’t survive another day of keeping quiet.
Which was how Leo found himself on the brink of tears, staring down at a water table full of brightly-colored plastic gears. Jason had grabbed Leo right before lunch that day and driven them nearly two hours out of town to visit an interactive science museum. They were doing an exhibit on engineering in ancient cultures, which Jason heard a radio ad for (who even listened to the radio these days? Jason Grace, that’s who) and just knew Leo would love. The exhibit was meant to be for kids, but Thursday afternoons were apparently slow enough that nobody was going to complain about the two college students playing with toys, so long as they behaved. Which meant that Leo’s mental breakdown was warring with a half-hearted attempt to recreate a Roman aqueduct.
“Hey, Leo? You alright?”
Leo looked over to find a very blurry Jason, which meant he’d actually started crying, which was just swell. He shoved the heels of his palms against his eyes like that would help shove his feelings back too. “Shit. Sorry. ‘M sorry.”
“You don’t have to be sorry,” Jason told him sweetly. “Just tell me what’s going on?”
Leo sucked in a deep shuddering breath and stared at the ceiling, which was swimming in and out of focus. “Jason, I fucked up.”
Jason looked down at the half-finished project in front of Leo, then at his own, which was in significantly worse condition. “That’s okay. I’m sure they’d let us start over if we ask nicely.”
Leo chuckled weakly. “You’re really cute; you know that?”
“I– Well–” Jason sputtered, blushing bright red. “Thank you?”
“Unfortunately, it makes my job super hard,” Leo said somewhat bitterly. Jason didn’t say anything, he just waited for Leo to keep going, so he did. He took the plunge, knowing there was no going back. “I have a crush on you.”
Leo wasn’t sure what reaction, exactly, he was looking for, to be honest. Disgust? Probably. Awkwardness? Without a doubt. Screaming and crying? Only if Jason were kidnapped by highly expressive aliens and/or Leo was left alone. Any of that would have been easier than Jason just staring at him like he was waiting for the punchline of a joke that had already landed. Leo scowled, cheeks going pink. “Well? Say something.”
Jason paused for another second before he frowned. “Wait. That’s it? That’s how you think you fucked up?”
Leo blinked at him, tears pooling in his eyes. “Um. Yes?”
“Why would you having a crush on me be a bad thing?” Jason asked, cocking his head to the side. “I had kind of assumed you had a crush on me.”
“What, you just assume everyone has a crush on you?”
“No, but I assume the guy dating me has a crush on me.”
“I–” Leo froze. “Dating you?”
“Um, yeah.” Jason’s brows furrowed. “I mean, I know you said we weren’t going to be official until I passed the test or whatever, but I figured that was just your weird way of saying you wanted to keep things casual.”
“This is you keeping things ‘casual?’” Leo wheezed. He was suddenly terrified of what Jason would consider serious. Then he shook his head. “What? Nonono. I wasn’t dating you, I was never dating you. I was testing you.”
“Testing me for what?”
“Piper?” Leo said, suddenly feeling very, very foolish. “You have a crush on her, right?”
“I genuinely mean no offense, but who would optionally have a crush on Piper?” Jason asked. “She hates that kind of stuff and makes no effort to hide it. Having a crush on Piper would probably just hurt my feelings.”
“I– Yeah, that’s what she said,” Leo stammered. “But-but don’t you want to date her?”
“If I dated Piper, I’m pretty sure she’d be miserable, specifically because she’s dating me. I don’t really have a big ego, but my one point of pride is that the people I date aren’t miserable because of it.” Leo let out a wet little laugh and Jason smiled at him. “Come on. Let’s go to the cafe and maybe you can tell me what’s going on.”
Leo nodded and let Jason take him by the hand and lead him over to a rickety little table in the cafe where he was safely deposited. A few minutes later, Jason sat down across from him, carrying a coffee and a guava juice that Leo hadn’t even needed to ask for. “Alright. Tell me what the hell you think is going on.”
So, Leo told his side of the story, starting from the overheard conversation in the library and his initial horror at the thought of the most popular guy on campus having a crush on his best friend and what that might mean for her. Then about how he got an idea to use that crush as a shield – an awful, mean idea, he was realizing now that he’d realized Jason was a person, not a concept. About how he’d offered to test the waters first, knowing that he was more equipped to handle this kind of stuff than Piper. About how Jason had so eagerly agreed and about how wonderful the past three months had been. About how he had chosen to detonate the most perfect thing in his life because he couldn’t just keep it a secret.
By the time he was done, Leo felt smaller than a bug, and there was a pile of torn up napkins in front of him. He hadn’t drunk his juice. “I really thought you knew I was testing you for Piper,” Leo said miserably. “I wasn’t trying to, like, trick you or anything. I was just trying to help her.”
Jason stayed silent for a long time, his hands folded neatly around his coffee cup, which was just as full as Leo’s. “Well, this is a little awkward.”
“I know,” Leo said, staring down at his lap. “I’m sorry.”
“I don’t have a crush on Piper. I never had a crush on Piper.”
“I know.”
“But I did have a crush on you.” Leo’s head whipped up, and Jason gave him a shy little smile. “That gossip you overheard? I was talking to my friend Nico about the guys we like, and I said that mine was short with brown hair, brown eyes, a genius intellect, and a wild streak.” He chuckled and his eyes were warm and fond when they rested on Leo. “I don’t think I could have described you more specifically without using your name.”
“Really?” Leo squeaked, having gone completely vermillion and lost control of his voice.
“Really,” Jason grinned. He reached over and started gently untwisting Leo’s fingers one by one until they could hold hands again. “But, um, seeing as I’ve had a crush on you for a while, and you have a crush on me now, do you think you’d maybe like to give dating a try? Like, for real, just us, no tests or best friends involved. This place is kinda out of the way, but it makes for a pretty memorable first date, don’t you think?”
Leo just blinked at him for a moment, then he surged forward to grab Jason by the face and kissed him for the first (but hopefully far from last) time.
headcanon that Jason Grace loved candy corn and Leo would always make fun of him for it, so when Jason died, Leo would eat candy corn while sitting next to Jason’s grave.
there was a time where i used to vent to my bsf about thinking that my sibling hated me and this is so crazy because now I consider my brother one of my best friends
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