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My orange son naps where he wants to!

Unlike most horror movies, this movie was SCARY. Actually, Heidi and I keep looking at each other and saying killlllllllllllllll meeeeeeeeeeeeee and then laughing. Best line of the whole movie.

#movies #moooovies #OBSESSION

Saw this last night and it was weird. It was parts Being John Malkovich, Candyman, Severance, Eraserhead and probably other references I didn't catch. The movie takes time to get going, but when it does, it is absolutely wild and weird.

#backrooms #movies #moooovies

apoemaday

Love Poem

by Richard Brautigan

It’s so nice to wake up in the morning all alone and not have to tell somebody you love them when you don’t love them anymore.

alliwanttodoiscollectpoetry

Carrefour by Amy Lowell

#poetry #amy lowell

Little Lamb memorial garden taking shape.

#little lamb memorial garden #mooney

#my orange son #orange boys

apoemaday

At Last the Secret Is Out

by W.H. Auden

At last the secret is out, as it always must come in the end, The delicious story is ripe to tell to the intimate friend; Over the tea-cups and in the square the tongue has its desire; Still waters run deep, my dear, there’s never smoke without fire. Behind the corpse in the reservoir, behind the ghost on the links, Behind the lady who dances and the man who madly drinks, Under the look of fatigue, the attack of migraine and the sigh There is always another story, there is more than meets the eye. For the clear voice suddenly singing, high up in the convent wall, The scent of the elder bushes, the sporting prints in the hall, The croquet matches in summer, the handshake, the cough, the kiss, There is always a wicked secret, a private reason for this.

#poetry

#brooklyn #lamb #olan mills #lols

Wayne got me this t-shirt and I love it. We went to John Waters Going to Extremes: An 80th Birthday Celebration at the Luckman Fine Arts Complex last month. It was delightful. We just have to laugh and John Waters always makes me do that.

#wayniac #john waters #pope of trash #he hates when people use the word journey or talk about the weather

Alissa was in town and we walked all over Los Feliz talking about relationships, emotional regulation, dating, friendship, and people generally acting insane. She’s so smart about interpersonal dynamics and somehow always manages to articulate things I can feel but haven’t fully put words to yet.

We ended up talking about this weird situation I had with someone who behaved absolutely wretchedly. What made it so confusing was that this was seemingly a person who had worked on himself and should have been operating on a higher level emotionally. Instead, he showed up moody as fuck twice and the second time was honestly so bizarre I could barely process what was happening in real time.

The interesting part was Alissa bringing up the “window of tolerance” concept. Basically the idea that some people have a much larger ability to tolerate stress, discomfort, emotion, vulnerability, etc. without spiraling into hyperarousal or shutdown.

I realized part of why I was so baffled is because I genuinely forget that not everyone my age has developed those tools. I operate from a pretty large window of tolerance at this point in my life. I know how to self-regulate. I know how to calm myself down. I know how to pause before acting out. I’ve worked very hard to build those skills.

Alissa absolutely cracked me up describing certain men freaking out because they suddenly realize they are still “this guy they hate.” Like they’ve built an identity around being evolved or emotionally intelligent, but then intimacy or vulnerability shows up and suddenly they are behaving like a complete weirdo again.

Meanwhile the woman is sitting there like, “What the fuck is happening?”

And the guy is internally like:

“Oh god. I’m still this guy.”

Something else Alissa said that really stuck with me is that a lot of people date because they think another person is going to make them feel better. So they meet someone grounded, emotionally regulated, calm, interesting, whatever, and they think proximity to that person will somehow fix the discomfort they feel inside themselves.

Then when the relationship doesn’t magically regulate them, or when they still feel anxious, insecure, avoidant, angry, ashamed, lonely, etc., they act out because now they have to confront the fact that they are still themselves.

That honestly blew my mind.

The clown in question ghosted me for three weeks and then randomly called as if nothing had happened. No apology. No acknowledgment. No “sorry I acted like a full-time freak.”

I.just.don’t.have.time.

What was especially interesting was having women suggest I should “button up” the situation somehow. Absolutely not. Any communication implies I want communication. I do not. Absence of communication is communication.

Why are women still expected to emotionally clean up after men?

I behaved in a way that reflected my values and that’s enough for me. I’ve worked way too hard to create a quiet, peaceful life with family and friends I love to let chaos back in.

#alissa #window of tolerance #favorite post

I’m currently up to date on The Madison, Margo's Got Money Troubles, Widow's Bay, and Euphoria, even though I don’t really want to be watching Euphoria.

Alissa was telling me how Euphoria is not quite real and I know exactly what she means. She was pointing out that the show is emotionally true while being visually unreal, that the heightened style is the point (euphoric if you will), and that people might be missing it. Even in the first two seasons there were obvious moments where it felt drug-induced or disconnected from reality. This is a show that’s playing with color, saturation, and spectacle while telling a completely wild story. It kind of reminds me of Natural Born Killers, which did the same thing. Look it up, kids!

The Madison is cheesy, but I love watching Michelle Pfeiffer and staring at the scenery in Montana.

Margo’s Got Money Troubles is such an entertaining watch. I kind of want to read the book. Again, I love watching Michelle Pfeiffer. Nick Offerman and Elle Fanning are fun to watch together. Elle is having such a career run right now. Loved her in Sentimental Value and Predator: Badlands.

Widow's Bay had me howling with both fear and laughter. Matthew Rhys is unstoppable. The Americans is one of my favorite TV series of all time. This show had my full undivided attention, and normally I have to go to the movie theater to make that happen.

#watching #tv #the madison #euphoria #widow's bay #margo's got money troubles #alissa

I listened to the audiobooks Famesick by Lena Dunham and Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage by Belle Burden. Both were incredibly well-written page turners.

I can’t say enough good things about Lena’s insights, even when she’s being completely over-the-top annoying, which she genuinely cannot seem to help. I was also really interested to learn more about her EDS since one of my best friends suffers from it as well. It sucks. It’s depressing. Not fun.

I was hesitant to give Strangers any of my time since the whole world seems to be talking about it. I worried it might be the kind of book that gets popular because it’s basic. Nope. Belle is an incredible writer. She owns all her mistakes and somehow keeps the reader wondering how it will all turn out.

#reading #books #audiobooks #lena dunham #belle burden #strangers #listening

Saw The Devil Wears Prada 2 and Michael. Both were very entertaining.

I can’t get over a scene in Michael where he’s talking about his new album in this high-pitched voice and the camera slowly pans out to reveal he’s talking to a llama. High comedy. Jaafar Jackson was absolutely incredible. I want to see what he does next!

The Devil Wears Prada 2 was such a fun ride. Obviously, I loved Andy wearing the Björk t-shirt. The devil really is in the details.

Justin Theroux was barely recognizable, but it was also very obvious they were making fun of Elon and Jeff, which was delightful. Then of course I listened to Every Outfit subs only episode discussing the film and they were highly critical. The funny thing is I agreed with almost everything they said and still enjoyed the movie.

#movies #moooovies #The Devil Wears Prada 2 #Michael

I used to have a cat who threw actual temper tantrums, scared all the neighbors, and bullied me. We had an understanding. I feel so lucky to have had her in my life.

#lamb #psycho bully #intellectual