Strange in the sense of sometimes stir crazy. I'm a sarcastic and pessimistic geeky nerd with no real hope for good things in life. You can always hit me up with something by putting it in my ask or DM. I'm not as anti-social on the internet as I may seem in real life.
Is sharing playlists a thing anymore? Anyway... I've been slowly collecting songs that fit Goren and Eames and their vibe.
Maybe you find a song or two that you like. Also, I take suggestions.
Here's some of the notes, starting with the things multiple people brought up:
SHRIMP COCKTAIL:
banahbanah: #flashback to that one fic where Peter Parker frets about drinking shrimp cocktail because of the alcohol
generaldeliciousness: adding: what a prawn/shrimp cocktail is
#why is your character turning it down because they're under 21 #do you think prawn cocktail is a cocktail #this lives in my brain rent-free constantly #the rest of the fic was so normal #and good enough that i'll still re-read it #but bro
And then many, MANY, people wondering if this was actually authour mistake, since Peter really would do this!
POMEGRANATES:
zhajhassa: #haha where's that post that was like someone describing someone eating a pomegranate but they ate it like an apple
thornhands: #once someone wrote persephone biting into a whole Pomegranate #had to stop and stare at a wall for a minute
sungsingsanguine: I once saw someone very confidently write about a character eating slices of pomegranate.
FRUIT TREES:
zagreuses-toast: #given a very endearing glimpse into a writers blindspots by seeing them describe someone sitting under a ''pineapple tree''
salatrash: I remember something about picking watermelons... OF A FUCKING TREE
baander: #cranberry trees
DOUGH/BATTER:
maycelium: #I'm a chef so I'm really used to people not accurately describing how to cook food #But I was surprisingly flabbergasted when someone was writing making a cake and was kneading it. Which uh #Not necessary for cake. It was interesting for sure but just bizarre
livebloggingmydescentintomadness: #the one that drove me nuts was when a character set aside a batch of PASTA DOUGH 'to rise' #pasta doesn't have yeast!! #it does need to REST but it will never RISE #you do not want an airy crumb on your noodles
lovesodeepandwideandwell: #THE ONE WHERE THEY MADE COOKIES BY LADLING BATTER INTO A TRAY
Some other topics:
ANIMALS:
catenarwhal: #mandatory 'how cows produce milk' mention#i'll never recover from that one I fear
piromantic: #one time i saw someone fake their way through describing how spiders behave
pluto-lichen: horses
misskittypotter: #stardew valley faking its way through what fresh fish smell like
pa-pa-plasma: #saw someone faking their way through knowing what a seal is once #i still am fucked up over that one to this day. they just straight up did not know #& they were NOT good at guessing it either like it was clear they had never googled that animal ever #& was only just now realizing via answering questions from anons that seals are not!! what they assumed. initially
SEX:
dykevandyke: #what a prostate is #and where it is located #as in. external.
dreamyeyedrose: #I remember back in the ff.net days reading an Ichigo/Renji fic where the writer assumed the penises go inside each other #and I was like “I mean I don't know how it works for sure I don't have one but idk if that's how it works”
SOME OTHER FOOD STUFF:
thetrekkiehasthephonebox: #add another one to the list bloggers#this character is cooking a salad
shosta: #still baffled about the published work that didn't know food could freeze
sun-dari: #once i read a fic where the author didn't understand cinnamon
alto-tenure: #read something recently where the author was just. blatantly wrong about spices
dramatic-dolphin: #i saw someone try to fake their way through what ramen is once. like 14 years ago.#but i remember.#i was very confused about ramen for a few months. they were writing it so authoritatively.
the-celery-stalks-at-midnight: #i will never ever forget someone putting leftover fries in the microwave to reheat them and setting the timer for five minutes
typeghost: #this sparked a memory of a hannibal fic where the author had to fake their way through writing about gravy
draculin: #the one fanfic where the author knows about coffee only as a concept wrote a character as a coffee drinker#was very interesting#I don't remember the fandom or the plot but I was mesmerized by the coffee actions and choices
11235811235811: #there's a lot of faking their way thru congee in the svsss fandom i'll also note
fishali3n: #read one where the person clearly didnt know what tofu is
emmy-everafter: #in the aftermath of shadow and bone s2 i saw a lot of people pretending to know what stroopwafels are #babes they are more like cookies than breakfast waffles #like yes there is a waffle pattern but you're not gonna cut into a stack of them with syrup and sugar#🤣🤣🤣
NON-FOOD STUFF:
red-umbrella-811: Shoutout to Dame Agatha Christie for faking her way through what a wrench is in a very popular published work.
bluebeetle: #once saw someone have a character put an entire phone book in their pocket
nonametis: #- sex talk in languages other than english #<- or just the petnames in a different language other than English
sadisticpony: #the fanfiction i saw this week where op DIDNT KNOW HOW AUTOMATIC DOORS WORKED #and that they arent in peoples homes!!! of course. also opening the automatic door for someone is unironically very funny but its not #its not like. grabbing the door handle to let someone in. helpppp
danmeichael: #reminds me of the fic with the figure drawing class where the character started with the feet. #i love you feet first figure drawing author
meowmix1100blr: #me watching this one fic absolutely obliterate what the board of directors does
vexedhexes: #one time i read an architect character making a doorway bigger by building a bigger door #what a beautiful world. #OH. also gravity falls fic where they go 'oh piedmont is in california so its warm all year round'
leveragehunters: #characters going to a beer garden #And it's literally a garden outside the pub#It was a very cute mistake
fitofpique: #yes! #grown men do not get blind drunk off two beers #but i am possibly guilty of the hypothermia one #assuming it does not make you very horny?
dadvans-likes: #always thinking abt the soup kitchen fic #the entire setting of the fic was 'soup kitchen' #and i very quickly realized #the author did not know what a soup kitchen was #and they thought that soup kitchens only served soup #fic
msmargaretmurry: #i love fanfiction #once read a fic where the characters played 20 questions #but the author seemed to not know how to play 20 questions and was just kind of winging it........ #immaculate
shakespeareaddict: #Look I know not all of us are hockey experts #But it takes about ten seconds of research or any attention paid to the show to realize #That the Stanley cup playoffs are not in fucking September
baejax-the-great: #the funniest one i saw #was someone faking what church is like #like 1. they really didn't have to write an entire church experience for their fic #and 2. they had clearly never even watched a show where people went to church #it was bonkers weird
twosunson: #things ive seen authors faking #knowing how to unclog a drain #knowing. literally any history #knowing what ketamine looks like (apparently- oregano) #(you know who you are)
waterhorseyblues-ao3: #beltane being celebrated in winter #wales being portrayed as a completely separated land from england (i wish) #characters getting up after weeks of bedrest like that dosnt completely fuck you up
violetfairydust: #i once read a fic where the flight time from london to seattle was 3 hours
purekesseltrash: One time, in a fic set specifically in Des Moines, IA, two of the characters casually drove 20 minutes to the ocean. The memory continues to delight me. I want to know where that author thought that Iowa was.
I was wondering what happened to the Texts from last night thing... and well... I got inspired... I feel like I need to stay away from that site or things will escalate.
(Let's be honest... she doesn't need a dick pic from either to want to do that to them.)
(It could honestly be either of them saying it.)
(It would work. Maybe. Goren can be quite dense sometimes.)
Well, hello there. Long time, no see. Anyway, I'm back with one of my personal favorite episodes. And maybe not for the reason you might expect. Yes, I also love the coffee scene. And I also love that, once again, Goren and Eames are working together to uncompromisingly protect the helpless. But what makes it one of my favorites, is just the quiet undercurrent in the first third of the episode of Eames being the person with the tech knowledge. And not in the "I had a course on it, so I know it." way, it's more in the she's really into certain areas of tech. And I know that she is the one who does computer stuff in other episodes, too, but this feels a little more in depth. Anyway, let's get into it.
Goren: Wi-Fi card. A, um...
Eames: An N-connector.
Yes, I needed to look up what that is. Pretty unspectacular connector. But, 2 other things: 1. I have no idea where in the name of sanity he pulled that thing from. It's not from the card. And 2. That is a PCI card. I'm pretty sure of it. They just removed the slot bracket. Which makes what Eames does later with just pushing it into a front slot very unrealistic. This goes where the sun don't shine on the motherboard. Or maybe the sun does shine there, if you have a transparent side panel. I'm getting off track here.
But I do love that Eames confidently identifies the connector type like she knows and handles it every day.
Goren: I better call in.
And another time where the "call in"-excuse is used. Also their non-verbal communication is on point here. Just one look and everything is understood. So efficient.
Mountain goat. Maybe he's part goat and that's why he climbs on stuff? Eames looks up at him like "I remember him being smaller." and possibly starts to doubt that she can leave him alone for 2 seconds without him doing something weird.
Eames: Any programmer worth his chips would be drooling over a StealthWave, but Kevin acts like he doesn't care.
And you, too? The way she identified the computers on sight earlier and thought them to be "nice." Eames knows her computers apparently. In an age where prebuilt PCs where still a thing. Nowadays, you'd probably have a Dell sitting on the desk, maybe even just a laptop somewhere. And this is the episode I point to when I say she might be a gamer. She knows tech but she doesn't know algorithms and other networking stuff. Familiar with the concepts but not the more in-depths stuff. I would've loved to have her in F.P.S. or any other episode where they would've had to deal with gaming stuff. Could you imagine they'd need to investigate in an MMO thing and she just goes, "Okay, where do we need to go?" and logs on with her account. Or something like that. Haven't put in a lot of thought but think it would be funny if she'd just enlist the help of a guild for tracking a player.
Also, it's my headcanon that she knows how to number pages in Word from page 3. (You can take that skill out of my cold dead hands. I worked hard for that niche skill of learning how page numbers in Word work. So I will bestow that gift onto any character I want.)
That short glance at her partner. She knows he feels some vibes are off. This is not his usual bored with the situation walking off and busying himself with peoples' stuff. He is absolutely detecting something. And, personally, I love his little dance shuffle he does.
Also, can we talk about how weirdly those two sinks are placed? That is some realistically weird shit going on there. Though I also just spotted the interrogation room chairs in the background at the table behind Eames. Must be a hard month that the chairs need to take up a second job.
Goren: You know, you can help us out. We're in over our heads with all this high tech stuff.
Eames: He's not kidding. Until six months ago, we had rotary phones.
This is a good joke. Well, or actually a lie. But also, don't mock the humble rotary phone, built like a brick and made to last. A modern phone could never... be thrown at someone's head and survive without a scratch.
Goren wrestles the stuff from the guy and yanks the spoon out of his hand. No one else makes coffee for his partner. He is fully capable of doing it and knows exactly how she likes it. Or should I ask if she'd like some coffee with her sugar? (Also, is it just me or does anyone else cringe at the coffee pad used in the machine? Those two things don't go together. Sure, it works but... No.)
By the end there, you can see how much Goren doesn't care about what that guy has to say anymore. He has made coffee and feels that his partner found something and is about to call for him. At the very end of the gif you can just glimpse her looking over at him. They are so much on the same wavelength this episode.
And a small thing I noticed, she redirects herself to work first and then enjoy whatever nice treat her partner has brought over.
Sister: What did I do to him?
Goren: Well, Dr. Pynchon did it, not you.
He speaks the truth. While it may be true that she might've gotten him into the hands of that doctor, she wasn't the one who ultimately did the torturous things to Robbie. Actions have consequences but sometimes we can't see the consequences because we've been deceived. And yet, people have to live with the consequences of other peoples' actions. But we can't take the blame when other people deceive us. The blame lies with them for doing the bad things.
Carver: Don't you use psychological manipulation, Detective? Don't you deceive suspects and subject them to stress?
Eames: Except we respect their rights, we let them have lawyers present.
Very amazing and on point facial expression. Carver might have a point, but him equating them and their methods with torturers is a big stretch and rightfully earns him a very strong "What the fuck, man?!" look from Eames. He should know by now that these two are not just driven by their quest for truth but also guided by their strong sense of morals and their integrity.
Goren: You want us to break him, we can break him. I mean, with the state that he's in, maybe for good.
Eames: Not to mention his confession might not even hold up.
Carver: These are the chances I'm willing to take.
Goren: Not me, not with Robbie.
Eames: There's a better target.
They try to appeal to Carver's sense of humanity and that what he asks of them is cruel. Eames even says they might not be able to use the confession. And they have nothing else to connect Robbie with the murder. So that might be a lost case.
And Carver's blatant disregard of both of those valid points puts him back where we were years ago when he pulled back on his deal with the wife of that one criminal and made the detectives do things they would otherwise not have done. He needs to fully understand that he can't expect these two to do what he says if it goes against their beliefs. Especially if it goes against their beliefs.
Also, Eames as the one offering up an alternative strategy to get this solved is a nice touch as it will spare Goren the need to stand on his point more emphatically but also allows him to refocus on the actual culprit. And it will protect Robbie. She knows they can take on the doctor using exactly the things they were told to use. Deception, manipulation and emotional stress.
Another thing, maybe you've noticed Goren leaning himself very much towards Eames and he repeatedly looks at her whenever he's making a point, like he constantly checks to see if she is still with him, but also seemingly in part to ground himself when he gets the confirmation that she is. I mean where else would she be physically and emotionally, she is with him in their quest to not let more harm come to Robbie. He went through enough, they don't need to add on to that.
Goren: Uh... It's gonna be okay, Robbie.
It's such a small thing and from Robbie's perspective probably completely random. But together with them making sure he is protected in every way they can at that moment, it shows they do care about what happens to him. They know what happened was not his immediate fault, he became a victim of circumstances. They know he wouldn't have done it, if Pynchon hadn't done what she had done to him.
Eames: Everybody told us he'd never hurt a fly. Torture changed him.
Goren: Evil changes everybody.
This is one of those closing remarks that hit you with the truth.
I always go back to the episode from which the gif originates and her comment just before that.
Warren D'Alacosta: I don't know any Valerie whatever. It must have been a wrong number.
Eames: You wanna rethink that answer, Mr. D'Alacosta? We looked into your pedigree. Couple DUIs, couple dope pops, delinquent on your child support. You drive too fast, drink too much, don't meet your obligations, don't give a damn about anybody. My partner has a fancy word for people like you: psychopath. I call 'em screw-ups. If you want to join the two million of your fellow psychopaths who are already in jail, just keep lying to the police.
(1x09 - The Good Doctor)
But also the one from 'Cherry Red' "At 2 in the afternoon? Where are they playing, Tokyo?"
And there are soo many more. I just love her dry, witty comments.
Another album cover. (Is it obvious I'm not a graphic designer? My training was at the end of that workflow. I was firmly in post-print work. Minimal think, just make the impossible possible.)
Anyway this is the experimental collab project of Goreames. It features such bangers as "Longing & Yearning", "So that guy's dead", and "Not another one (What have I done)" feat. Danny Ross on screaming vocals.
(OG picture under the cut, for if you have a better idea.)
Another album cover. (Is it obvious I'm not a graphic designer? My training was at the end of that workflow. I was firmly in post-print work. Minimal think, just make the impossible possible.)
Anyway this is the experimental collab project of Goreames. It features such bangers as "Longing & Yearning", "So that guy's dead", and "Not another one (What have I done)" feat. Danny Ross on screaming vocals.
(OG picture under the cut, for if you have a better idea.)
Found a very weirdly lighted promo photo and really... I couldn't resist. It really looks like they're about to drop a sick album. (And yes, I made this in about 5 minutes with Paint while giggling to myself.) I'll attach the (suspiciously high resolution) original promo photo under the cut. If anyone wants to do a different/better job. (Please do a better job.)
Link to the original if tumblr eats the resolution
Tracklist:
1. no body, no crime (Taylor Swift)
2. Hungry Eyes (Eric Carmen)
3. Hard To Love (Lee Brice)
4. Casual (Chappell Roan)
5. Family Line (Conan Gray)
6. No One Knows Us (BANNERS)
7. In Between (Gracie Abrams)
8. Friends Don't (Maddie & Tae)
9. Renegade (Big Red Machine feat. Taylor Swift)
10. Once in a Lifetime (Landon Austin)
11. Dancing Queen (ABBA)
12. Inventing (Matilda Mann)
13. About You (The 1975)
Special edition with the Dun Dun (I find this way more funny than it actually is).
Found a very weirdly lighted promo photo and really... I couldn't resist. It really looks like they're about to drop a sick album. (And yes, I made this in about 5 minutes with Paint while giggling to myself.) I'll attach the (suspiciously high resolution) original promo photo under the cut. If anyone wants to do a different/better job. (Please do a better job.)
Link to the original if tumblr eats the resolution
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