This is the worst stardew valley confessions blog. We are here to take whatever you want to scream about.
The reason this blog was started was because the creator noticed that a lot of the content seen was tame with a dark underbelly that was hard to find or it was brushed under the rug. We want to see the worst of the valley. Mostly for entertainment but natural curiosity as well.
Make no mistake though, this is not a safe space. You won’t be safe here. This is circus, not a sanctuary.
Confessions are: Open
Rules
There are no actual rules except for anything that breaks tumblr guidelines. We will just delete asks that break this rule instead of responding so no one tries to continue just to farm reactions.
We also ask you keep confessions on topic. On topic confessions are any confessions about Stardew Valley. If it doesn’t involve the game itself, the characters, or the community then it’s not a Stardew Valley confession.
Asks that are off anon will be posted as written posts as to avoid accidentally exposing people. We understand sometimes you send an ask off anon my accident so we will avoid this issue entirely to keep things chill.
Other than that, go nut. Tell us your worst secrets, say the most gut wrenching fantasy you got, or just complain about random nonsense. You don’t have to be the worst to send an ask. As long as you follow the main rules, you are somewhat welcomed here.
We will usually just post an ask without comment (we may comment if we feel compelled to) but if you want us to voice our opinions on your confession, complaint along side you, or just want to know what we got going on then just put [Response] in the ask.
Usage example: I like this character [Response]
Rules will be added (More about ask etiquette than anything) as needed.
Tagging System (For organization)
Confession/asks- Crushed Joja Cola
NSFT- Unlucky Shorts
Written post- Soggy Newspaper
We will try to mark content as mature for nsft, but expect the worst anyways and don’t get too comfortable.
I get extreme dysphoria when I think about the fact that I can’t fuck Kent with a real penis. I want to make him weep and feel his walls of flesh the whole time but instead I was born with this stupid fucking vagina
I've been laughing my ass off at this whole blog for the past half an hour my god why are u guys so nasty why would someone even think about Shane picking his nose and eating his own mocus
It’s either nose picking or ass chugging, you don’t get normal confessions here.
And that is precisely why people confess stuff like that to this blog. It’s basically a shitposty confessional booth.
(TW sexual assault) I love hearing people talk about Clint, but I feel like too many people say he’d sexually assault or rape someone. I do think he’s sexist and misogynistic, but I think he’d be horrified at the idea of rape or sexual assault. That being said, I don’t think he’d actually stop it from happening, make a scene, or protest. Very much a “not my circus not my monkeys” kind of thing, if that makes sense
Stardew was way darker than I was expecting and I'm here for it. I love things with an adorable facade and dark core. (Though I also think the dark plot elements are great because a lot of people playing the game to cope with mental health will relate to and feel seen by them. I felt ... very seen when I watched Shane's heart events with depression)
If someone won't respect canon, won't respect other people's headcanons, won't respect concerned ape or are generally hateful and not civil, they don't deserve to be in the fandom. It goes against the game itself.
I feel like a loser freak sometimes because the only way that I kicked my own alcohol addiction was by marrying Shane in stardew. it is nice to feel like someone understands rock bottom with you.
i love sam so much i can not stop thinking about him. I need Him. Stupid Stupid STUPID!! i will be his obedient house wife or whatever. He wouldn't even know what that is. i just Need him. PLEASEEEEEEEEEE