Chapter 4: Long days turn to longer months
Its been a couple of months. He laid there in his bed. He was completely restless, yet at the same time lethargic. He didn't think his life could get anymore dreary. He couldn't imagine a world where it would be worse. Yet...There's always a possibility, and it's one he dreads every single second. He watches the clock. It slowly, but surely, makes a beat. A beat he plays in his head over and over again. Why was his life like this? He wondered what happened to his seemingly real goddess. Rosaleen. He was sure she hated him. He was sure she would never forgive him. It had been months since his first interaction at the washing machines.
What happened? You, the reader might ask.
It happened like a winter storm, a violent beauty that can cloud our visions, freeze our hearts, and chill our souls. He was called away to his father's hometown in Missouri. His grandfather had passed away. His grandpa was a man that did not have a huge presence in his life, but had a huge impact on the way Adair had acted. Adair slowly started to feel like he had lost another part of himself, he had to go on feeling like he had no emotions. It was a cold morning when they buried him. Snow was blowing around. This time a literal winter storm made Adair feel cold on both the inside and outside. He looked around the other gravestones. He saw them happily placed together. The irony of it all...'Til death do us part, yet in the very end they were still beside each other in death. He really wondered if he would have someone to be buried beside. To know he had someone to lie next to when he was 20 feet in the ground. He also wondered if there was a heaven or hell. If there was something waiting for him after he paid his last breath. He then began to think of Rosaleen. He had plans with her...Yet he came here to Missouri for a few months to stay with his family. He had no other real plans, and his work allowed him to leave for family emergencies, as long as he turned in some work online.
He spent a few months in the quiet fields of Missouri. It was much more different than California. Somewhere more mysterious, more melancholy, more distanced. He didn't feel the need to update any social media to tell the world where he was exactly. He felt like he was trapped in this space with himself, his family, and the cows. He would sit there looking out the window, and wondering what else was there to life besides working until the day you died. Then he thought of Rosaleen again. Maybe she was the key? But he was sure she would hate him for being gone for so long.
Eventually, after the wintry storm both, in his mind and in front of his face subsided he went back to the sunny shores of California. Where he felt he would only bring his label of gloom back to the happy folk of this village. He would be back after a couple of months. His roommates gave him a pat on the back once he returned, but knew that he was still distanced as ever. They were great people, and they have been with him forever, but he feels like they're just there to be with him now during their college career. After all, he dropped out and they were not part of his college career.
Back in the present...He could feel himself drifting in and out of sleep. He had begun working again, but that was the only reason he had to get out of bed. But, something would get him out of bed very quickly. It was a knock at his door, and his roommate shouting at him that it was someone looking for him. The girl he thought about was waiting for him.