White Spirit

Howl and I'll howl back.

[wrkiba]

That night we left the city...

... Tsume was still hesitant to follow, which I suppose is understandable. He is leaving all he knows, though from Toboe’s prodding from the last few days we learn the humans he was with had left him. From what I saw of them, it was a long time coming. I can see why. He’s obstinate and cynical, but the way his expression softens or tail twitches while speaking with Toboe makes me think there’s hope for him. He’s fairly easy to read now that I think about it.

The best thing to come from Tsume joining us is the never-ending energy from Toboe. He smiles so wide now, and I’d do anything to keep that aching look off his face. His questions for the gray seem far more numerous than when he and I started traveling together, though he’s no less patient.

I breathe in deeply, taking in the summer air and blue skies quieting my thoughts. The hint of lunar flowers floats by and the image of red eyes crosses my mind.

“Kiba, are you feeling better now?” Toboe asks from behind me. He is standing next to our newest addition who just stares expectantly. I nod and we keep moving forward.

[wrkiba]

He still has that look...

...that sad and dejected look, no matter how much he tries to hide it it’s still there. We met the gray wolf days ago, and Toboe has yet to stop talking about him. He tells me stories of being a pack and traveling, with this Tsume helping to lead and giving strength to others. After seeing him, I have to wonder how accurate Toboe’s description really is though, I can’t blame him. He remembers Tsume being very important and I’m sure his is. He must be; he’s reason we came here I know it.

Toboe sighs again as we walk the streets with no direction again. That’s it. I’m not doing this anymore. What are we doing, waiting? Waiting for what? I sniff the air catching Tsume’s scent and make a turn in his direction. Soon, we make it back to the area of the warehouse and Toboe finally looks up recognizing where we are.

“Kiba, why are we..?”

“Because he’s important right?” Large brown eyes wrinkle as a grin widens on his face. Without further comment we round a corner and enter the warehouse. Stained concrete and floating dust greet us again. It’s just as empty as the last time we found it, though now the vast quiet seems strange. Shouldn’t those humans be here? We continue following Tsume’s scent up some stairs to a smaller room where we find him unsurprisingly unhappy with our appearance.

“Tsume!” Toboe exclaims.

“What are you doing back here?”

“We came to get you,” replied Toboe.

“What like some pet dog you saw at the pound? Get out. I don’t need your useless pity,” says Tsume unconvincingly dismissing us. His tone clawing under my skin.

“I would think that you’re use to that what with being with those human friends of yours,” I say.

“They’re not my friends. I was just using them,” he retorts his voice edging on a growl.

Was? Before I could follow that line of questioning, Toboe jumps back into the conversation.

“Tsume, we’re leaving the city. Kiba and I want you to come with us.”

“And why would I do that?”

“Because you felt it, like we’ve known each other from a long time ago and we’re going to Paradise.” Toboe’s voice is soft yet firm reflecting his conviction. It’s a little surprising and warming to see.

“Is that what that guy told you to get you to follow him? Just drop your whole life and make your merry way to Paradise?!” Tsume says incredulously.

“I didn’t have a life to drop. Besides, you came with us before, what’s stopping you from doing it again?”

“You could die out there you know?” he says shifting his gaze from Toboe to glare at me.

“Possibly, everyone’s gonna die. It’s a natural part of life, but if your life has no purpose you’re dead already.”

The words spill out without a thought and suddenly the room is filled with evening light from a window that wasn’t there before. A faint scent of blood is hanging in the now frigid air. There are four of us all together and an outside force is pressuring us to run. Just as sudden, the memory is gone.

We’ve done this before and the surprise on Tsume’s face as the glaze fades away says that he’s thinking the same thing.

[wrkiba]

A gasp and my name called in fear.

My eyes snap open to see Toboe about to be grabbed by some man holding a knife. Instinct immediately reacts and I attack the man biting his hand and inserting myself between him and Toboe. He cries out backing away and cradling his injury while I take stock of the others in the group. There are too many and they’re surrounding us. “The hell you think you’re doing!?” A boy my age stocks forward with the others clearing a path for him. The scent of wolf rolls off him. Piercing eyes glare into mine then shift behind me toward Toboe, but break away quickly to resume contact with me. Was that shock on his face? “Answer me. What are you doing here?” Wiping the blood from my mouth I level my own glare at him. White blond hair, tan skin, and yellow eyes, all these features scream recognition in me. I know him; I don’t know how, but I do and his tone is pissing me off. He’s running around with a pack of humans. Has he forgotten what he is!? “We just needed a place to sleep, but I doubt anyone could get any rest being so close to filth.” Hackles raise as tension builds in the spacious room. “You know arrogant guys like you really need to learn their place,” he growls taking a step forward. I rise to his challenge taking my own step toward him, but am cut off by Toboe boldly coming in between us. “Stop it you two,” he says firmly before softening his tone. “Tsume, we just wanted somewhere to stay for the night and we weren’t bothering anybody so why do we have to fight?” Tsume’s eyes seem to glaze over for a second giving me time to notice the rising irritation from the humans. Whether it’s toward him of us I can’t tell. His glare comes back hiding an emotion I didn’t quite catch. “Fine, leave by sunrise,” he says before turning and walking away, the humans not far behind. When the last of them leave Toboe slumps to the ground curling into himself. Small trembles pass through his shoulders, hair covers his eyes, and a weighted whisper falls into the empty room. “He doesn’t remember.”

[wrkiba]

“I knew it...

I mean I wasn’t sure, but I had a feeling he was here.” Toboe says in awe as he paces the concrete floor of the abandoned warehouse. We found this place not long after... that.

“It’s been so long.. I forgot his scent.” He slumps against the wall dejected. I’ve never seen him like this before. He’s usually so cheerful and I want to help, but I have no words to comfort him. Frustration rises in me. I was so close to remembering something, maybe it would have helped. 

A pressure on my shoulder brings me out of my thoughts.

“You know, we’ll find him tomorrow and maybe between he and I we can help you remember.”

I stare is shock at my young friend and then raise an eyebrow. Of all things he’s comforting me, this is embarrassing. 

“Since when did you get so old and motherly?” He chuckles sitting next to me brushing shoulders. He gets this far away look in his eyes as he stares upwards.

“He’s here. We’ll definitely find him.... Kiba, I really miss him.”

Somehow, I understand. I’ve felt close to filling a space I’ve been missing and it’s been bothering me ever since we crossed that bridge.

[wrkiba]

It's hot and the streets are crowded...

...adding to my irritation. Toboe is bouncing with excitement again today. We've been in this city for about a week now and have yet to find what brought us here in the first place. I sigh catching the afternoon sun, noting we only had a few hours left of light. We should probably start looking for a place to sleep tonight, preferably one that didn't suddenly become occupied by loud human children. I suggest going toward an older and less populated area. The buildings tend to be more spacious and secluded. With that, we start making our way there. Toboe deciding to act more like the pup that he is, runs ahead spinning in circles occasionally. His antics make my irritation lesson, but a glare from shaded glasses distracts me. Prickling becomes gnawing in my head. The edge of a memory so close I can almost grasp it. In an instant it's gone just like the flash of grey fur that passed by with the flow of vehicles. I glance back to Toboe. It seems I'm not the only one who saw.

[wrkiba]

A prickling feeling...

... has settled in the base of my ears threatening to migrate to my temples heightening my apprehension as I stare at the large human construction. Towering rusted orange, metal beams are illuminated by the reflected lights of the city and harshly shadowed by the night. Toboe is standing next to me mouth open in awe and eyes wide staring at the cityscape.

With little prompting we make our way across the structure mindful of the waters below, and into a quiet area with deep shadows and few street lights. Toboe makes a suggestion of spending the night in an open ended alley. Having more than one escape route and judging by the smell, a surprising lack of human fluids makes it more than suitable. So I agree. He quickly began to scrounge through the trash for something to eat. Pulling out some greasy brown bags of...something, he holds one out to me. I decline his offer of the unappealing “food.”

I make myself comfortable sliding down the brick wall in the middle of the alley. After finishing his meal, Toboe settles next to me with a sigh and the intention of going to sleep. I wish I could say the same for myself, but the prickling feeling from earlier has moved to nag at the back of my head. It feels familiar like when I met Toboe, but it’s irritating and causing me to be on edge. Too distracted to sleep, I keep watch while my young friend twitches his fingers and feet in a running dream. I tilt my head to the night sky sighing with relief. The city lights haven’t washed out the nearly full moon.

[wrkiba]

A red moon hovers in the sky.

The air is thin and ice cracks under me. I am running despite my bruised and cut body. I must reach the top before it’s too late, but why am I running? A howl pierces the wind behind me and all I see is a pair of eyes filled with remorse, pain, and acceptance. I suddenly plummet into darkness. I left him behind. My friend is gone. A jolt runs through my body as my eyes open. I sit up with a sinking feeling in my chest as I try to recall my whereabouts. We reached the forest yesterday. After finding a water source and drinking our fill we found shelter. Too tired from days of walking to hunt I must have fallen into a deep sleep. A whine to my right brings my attention to Toboe, who is staring at me with heavy amounts of concern. I ignore his question and state my intention to go hunt alone. Maybe I can catch some rabbits. Maybe it'll distract me from this feeling. Scenting the air for prey I catch a hint of salt. We must be getting close to the ocean.

[wrkiba]

For days there has been nothing...

... but rock and shrubs. The dry air is heightening my nagging thirst; thankfully the Spring season is keeping the bright sun from scorching us. It has been long since out last meal and while Toboe hasn’t been whining, his stomach has been making up for his silence. That and the ever present dry patch in the back of my throat has me...annoyed.

Toboe trots up next to me seeming to have something on his mind. Is he going to complain like his stomach?

“Hey Kiba, we’re going West right?        So how far West do we have to go?”

“Until we stop needing to go West.” I pick up my pace noticing the myriad of colors in the sky from the setting sun. A heavy sigh blows through Toboe’s nose as is out of agitation.

“What are we going West for?”

That’s a good question. I was far more sure when we started in this direction, but now the smell of lunar flowers has gone faint.

“I smelled lunar flowers coming from this direction, and it felt like there was something important out here.”

My answer seems to sate his curiosity as he falls silent again. Dusk is now approaching and I again try to swallow around the lump in my throat. Then the scent of trees dances by my snout giving us the promise of water. Toboe notices as well and adds more bounce to his stride, that is, until his stomach loudly complains again. 

Hopefully tonight there will be some moon light to take the edge off.

[wrkiba]

Dry air, thinning trees, and...

... high winds; we must be close to a desert region. A small herd of elk is grazing not too far ahead and Toboe, fully recovered, is a small distance away. This may be the last meal we get in a while, if it falls through we may have to live off of moonlight. I gave him the task of separating the target from the rest of the group. It shouldn’t be too hard since it is small and slower than the rest. Hopefully Toboe can get the right opportunity and timing, though this ever changing wind could easily give us away.

The herd leader seems on the alert now. When I look back to Toboe he has crept closer to our target. The leader’s ears twitch again. We’re about to lose our chance. A sudden gust of wind blows from behind me no doubt carrying my sent straight to the herd. Toboe springs into action and the group bolts. Our prey is successfully chased in the opposite direction with Toboe shortening the distance between them. The young elk takes a sharp turn in my direction, he strides along side,  and leaps onto its back.

This is my chance to take it down. I take off from my hiding spot and surprise our prey making it jerk left throwing off Toboe. Its movements slow considerably allowing me to strike easily at its neck. The elk falls and a sigh of relief spills from me as Toboe pads over panting. I take stock of our meal and notice a large gash in its side.

Heh, better than I thought.

“Good job on slowing him down,” I say clasping a hand on his shoulder.

He smiles brightly from the praise and we begin to eat. “You know, this was harder than I it looked even though I’ve taken down bigger,” he says between mouthfuls “ but then again giant walruses don’t run.”

The meat I was tearing away slips back into place and I turn my gaze back to my friend. I can only hope that the shock isn’t too obvious in my eyes.

[wrkiba]

Sun rays are shining down...

...through the tree tops, and the air is warm giving a sense of Spring. We are traveling through a wooded area near a road, though the only evidence of it is the distant sound of cars speeding by. Toboe bounces with every step as we make our way West. I’m glad he’s feeling well and that his wound is fully healed. My pace has quicken a bit at seeing his attitude; his giddiness seems to be infectious.

Suddenly, young paws skid in front of me and with a pouncing stance he barks, “I bet you can’t catch me.” He pivots and takes off full speed.

I’m stunned for a moment but,excitement and competitiveness take over after realizing his ridiculous statement. My paws dig into the ground and I push myself into a sprint in order to catch up to the pup. Toboe weaves through the trees with ease using some push off points to gain more distance.

A zig-zag pattern, very smart.

I kick off the tree trunks in a similar manner, but I’m sure to use more force. I’m quickly gaining on him. What?

He disappeared and with another full stride I find out how. There’s a sudden decline of the ground and Toboe is waiting for me just over the edge. He leaps towards me and I quickly dodge and turn to grab his back leg and drag him in my direction, except I lost my footing and we tumble down the hill. We roll through the greening grass down to the bank of a stream where I pin him on his side. I get off him and he sits up and pouts refusing to look at me.

“No fair you cheated by using you human form.”

“You need to use what you have to your advantage.”

He turns to face me and I can’t help but smile at his mud stained face. Of course he notices and raises his hand to wipe it away, but to no avail. So he promptly splashes into the stream washing off all the dirt. When he comes back to the bank he proceeds to shake out his fur. Now I’m all wet and he’s laughing at me, but I can’t stop smiling.

I never thought  I would ever play a game of chase ever again.

[wrkiba]

The sun is just beginning to rise...

... and the air is chilled with the desperate cling of Winter. Through the tall grass, at the edge of a farm field I see an adolescent deer weakened from an old injury. Toboe is crouching next to me; his wound now starting to scab over and no longer needing the herbs. Any real exertion could easily rip it open again since this is his first real lesson, he'll just be watching. He all but begged me to teach him and I of course obliged. He should know all this already, but without a proper pack it's not surprising that all he learned was to scavenge. I begin our lesson when the deer wonders a few steps closer to our location.

“Stealth and timing,” I remind him as I give him a sign to stay put. Then I carefully move toward my prey being as quiet as possible to close the six bound distance. The wind blows toward me and the deer has turned its flank into my direct line of sight. This couldn’t be any more perfect. At four bounds I ready for my strike. A small rustle behind me is all I hear when my prey becomes alarmed.

Now!

I reach my prey just before it goes into a full sprint. My teeth sink into its throat and with my full weight I bring it down to the ground snapping its neck in the process. Paw steps trot up behind, stopping with an excited yip. We drag the deer back to the grassy tree line and begin our meal.

“You made that look so easy. Do you think I’ll ever be that good?”

“With enough practice anyone can, even with bigger prey like this. It’s not like before where prey was so scarce that almost all food was in the cities.....!?” What?

“Yea.. Kiba, you remember!?”

“No.... It just came out.”

[wrkiba]

The skies are wide open...

… with sparse clouds floating by and a cold wind blows across the large clearing. Toboe is bouncing about in mock fight stances and small growls. He’s probably full of excess energy from the slower pace we’ve been taking the last few days.

He’s placed herbs over his wound having said that it helps to heal faster. I wonder where he learned to do that. One of the leaves is beginning to peel off and I fear he may worsen his injuries with his antics of trying to goad me into play fighting.

“You’re going to reopen you wound if you keep running around like that and then it’ll scar even worse.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine. Besides, Tsume was covered in scars and man they were really cool,” he says with another hop.

“No Toboe. It’s important that it heals properly.” The words come out firm.

“Oh… ok” His demeanor shrinks and his ears slightly lower. I did not mean to be so harsh, but I hope he understands.

We stride up a hill that overlooks a nearby town. This would be a good spot to rest for a while. I lay down with the dry grass pressing against my back. No matter how often I wear this illusion I’ll never get used to it. Toboe huffs down a small ways across from me and begins reapplying his herbs. 

“Let’s go!“ 

"Wait, you’re not going anywhere with these wounds and an empty stomach.” I’m gently pushed down by Toboe but, I have no energy to resist.

“Well I know somebody here who has a stuffed gut." 

"Hey, you were the ones who didn’t eat. Cole was nice enough to bring us food and you turned up your noses. It’s rude to let food waste. I had no choice but to eat it all myself. Someone had to do it." 

They argue a bit more before the one with the scar on his chest demands the other go find food for everyone. Toboe leaves too saying going to look for more herbs. Then it was just us. Him leaning in the ruined doorway and I laying on the ground trying to recuperate. Why stick around and watch over me? He doesn’t  sound like the type to get involved in other’s business, so why? Oh right that scar, is this that Tsume Toboe’s been telling me about? Looking down I see my wounds, are covered in herbs.

I see; he’s used that healing method before on me. Maybe I should apologize.

[wrkiba]

City after city...

...and we’re finally in the familiar territory of trees. Skies are still gray, but the temperature is pleasant. I take a deep breath bringing in the scents of pine needles and oak sap, but something isn’t right. Metal?... Scanning the ground nothing seems off with the roots or the leaves.. Wait! That pile of pine needles is too neat. What!?

“Oh sorry for bumping into... Kiba, what’s wrong?”

“It’s a trap.”

A gasp escapes from him as he follows me to the unnatural pile. A heavy stick would be best to spring it. I spot a large light gray rock near the root of a tree. That’ll do.

The trap snaps from the added weight and Toboe flinches. The metal is worn and the soft inner edge is deteriorating, exposing the metal underneath. That’s not good. One would lose a leg if they live long enough to get free.

“There could be more of these and hunters. We need to be careful,” I say putting on my human guise.

“Y-yeah” he stutters as he follows my example.

Bang!

“Aah!”

“Toboe!”

Fast paced crunching of leaves and twigs are coming toward us; I yank Toboe behind the biggest tree I can see hoping he understands my gesture and quiets his whimpering.

Where was he hit? Good, the bullet just grazed his foreleg so not life threatening. Now where are those assholes?

“Did you see that? I totally nailed that wolf.”

“It would have been dead if you nailed it and you’ve never even seen a wolf before stupid. It was a coyote, damn things make the weirdest noises; almost sound like people.”

“Whatever, where’d it go?”

Heavy booted footsteps come closer and a heavy scent of deer wafts to me. So that’s why I couldn’t smell them before.

“you definitely nicked the damn thing. Poor bastard left a blood trail.”

They’re starting to piss me off. Shit they’re getting too close and Toboe’s injured.

“Toboe, can you run?” I whisper. He nods with large wide eyes; instinct kicking in.

I watch the two humans focusing on every move. One more footstep, one more second, one more heart beat pass and I bump Toboe’s shoulder before sprinting West.

“What the fuck! You hit a kid!?”

“What the hell are they even doing out...”

The voices fade as we run and run, and after a while all I hear is mine and Toboe’s footsteps. We should be far enough away now to rest. I hope his wound isn’t too deep.

[wrkiba]

I'll get back to writing soon I promise. I just want to show you this super amazing piece of art. It's like falling in love all over again.

[wrkiba]

It's unexpectedly warm...

… for this time of year, as well as noisy. The sound of sirens has increased as of late. I am told that they are from policemen and usually happen when a human is in trouble, but all I can think is being glared at and chased for checking on Kelly. It's been so long since I've seen her.. I wonder how.. Agh! My eyes shut tight and I fight the urge to cover my ears. A distant siren is now extremely close and with the way Toboe is covering his ears, it has put even him on edge. It quickly passes and I hear the angry chatter of the few humans on the street. Another thing that has increased lately, which has us both confused. It would be best to sleep on the outskirts of town tonight.

[wrkiba]

We reach another city...

… where the stars are again blocked out by all the humans’ lights. Hunger rumbles from Toboe’s belly and he tries to quiet it with human hands.

“Eh he he, guess I’m hungry… Oh, I know of a place we can easily get some food, if they have one here.”

What does he mean? He scents the air and leads us down the side walk. We wonder for a while going left two times and then right to the back alley of what smells like some sort of bakery.

“Here we are,” he states excitedly while jogging over to the container of trash. Then he just hops into the large bin without any hesitation. What is he doing?! A sizable see through bag hops out with Toboe coming out after it. He quickly tears open a hole and the smell of bread and meats rises up.

We eat our fill and find shelter in a small empty building. I rest against a wall still tasting our meal on my tongue. The food was.. awful.

“It’s the best we can get around here. If I see a deer loping by I’ll be sure to catch it  for you.”

Again no face or name comes to mind with the small memory, just more confusion and frustration. Who said that to me? Would Toboe know?

“Hey Kiba?...Do you remember when Tsume finally started believing in Paradise? He was so cool then.. I hope we can find the others soon.”

Catching me off guard, I look up and search for the memory in his innocent face but I can’t find it. I really wish I could remember.

“No I don’t. I’m sorry.” Brown eyes widen at my answer.

“But...Do you.. remember anything from before?” I shake my head. “Oh.”

Silence follows and an odd tension rises between us. The outside wind presses hard against the building causing it to groan. Suddenly nails scrape against concrete and paws trot over to my side. My younger companion encircles himself on the floor as if readying for sleep. He nudges my forearm with affection.

“I can help you. If you want I can tell you all about them and all that I remember.”

I view him from the corner of my eye and unsuccessfully hide the smirk on my face. “That’s not how packs work. The old take care of the young, not the other way around.” His chin rests on the floor between his paws as he childishly pouts. I rub my cold nose on the bridge of his auburn snout. “But thank you, Toboe.” He lets out a breath of contentment and I too curl up for sleep.

For the first time in so long, I feel warm as I fall asleep.

[wrkiba]

We've been traveling for a week

The scent of lunar flowers leading us westward. Toboe has again surprised me with how well he’s kept up with the pace. The cold winds and frozen ground haven’t bothered him as much as I expected, but his normal mood seems to have fallen a bit. “You’re doing well in not falling behind,” I say stopping at a small outcropping of trees in a large farm field. The break isn’t really needed, but Toboe looks a little tired. “Well I did say I wasn’t going to whine anymore or run away.” I appreciate that he wants to be grown up, though he should play while he can, but… “When did you say that?” “It was when we saved you from that big poisonous plant that took you to some really happy place. Don’t you remember?” Frustration starts to boil in me. Why can’t I remember these things? It’s always just beyond my reach. I have voices in my head, but no faces or names to match them. It was the same with Toboe. Has this… happened before? “Oh… well, I was just saying that I’m not a kid anymore so of course I can keep up just fine." He determinedly marches forward through the field and I rise to follow. Why is it so hard to remember?