The Trials & Tribulations of a Lazy Perfectionist

Jess, Uni of Leicester, 21, from Cardiff. I reblog things I find funny, or pretty, or interesting, or that need to be shared. #BlackLivesMatter

[arcadine]

If you reblog my selfie I will consider you a personal friend and will give you front seats at my wedding and also I won’t have you politically assassinated when I take over the world

[mapsontheweb]

Map of IAT results for racial bias by country in Europe.

[8756453424354657-deactivated201]

a girl whos tummy is sore because she ate dairy: is a bit quiet a guy:She was perfect, pure maddening sex, and she knew it, and she played on it, dripped it, and allowed you to suffer for it

[neilnevins-deactivated20240617]

I think now that we’re in 2017 we can stop villainizing the witch from Hänsel and Gretel. Some kids ate her house. She gets to eat them. It was a fair deal.

[hrmphfft]

counterpoint: Hänsel and Gretel were led out into the woods to starve at the urging of their mother, so both parents don’t have to ration any more food for them during hard times. Hänsel and Gretel were underfed and desperate, and when life gives you a gingerbread house in that state, you eat the windowsill and the front stoop and every gumdrop you can find.

conclusion: if the witch prompted the children to explain themselves she’d realize it was ultimately parents’ neglect that led them to this point.

solution: eat the parents. everyone wins!

[thebootybitchdragon]

Not the solution I was expecting, but honestly, yeah, it makes sense.

[cheaphalloweencostume]

I was asking myself just now why they have “16 and pregnant” but not “16 and impregnated a girl” but I realized it would be pretty boring to watch a 16 year old boy play video games and go to school and live life as normal

[eclaire89]

Whoop there it is

[grumpy-radfem]

also:

[themanicpixiedreamgrrrl]

[library-mermaid-blog]

Customers who get angry when I read them their total cost are so compelling to me. Take charge of your narrative, Janice. Be the hero of your own story. You are the one who is purchasing $113.67 worth of adult zen coloring books, Janice. It’s not me you hate, Janice. It’s not me.

[homedesigning]

(via 50 Stunning Outdoor Shower Spaces That Take You To Urban Paradise)

[gallusrostromegalus]

Some vaugely related concepts:

Racoons and thier little theiving hands.

Winter

I know wherever this is is tropical but even tropical’s got some cold-ass days in there.

Burst Pipes

Floor Mold

Litter

your neighbors

your neighbor’s over-friendly dog that just LOVES the water

Speaking of tropical, Aligators and other large reptiles

Sudden Coconuts

Just imagine trying to get up and ready for work and there’s the raccons, all lathered up in your Dr. Bonners and eating your pumice stone.

you can’t interrupt that.

thier eyeliner is flawless.

I also have some serious questions about the fish-tank bedroom but that’s another can of worms and it’s 4AM and I don’t want to get into your exhibitionism fetish anymore.

slugs

[chillwerewolf]

small child: [absolutely incomprehensible gibberish]

me:

[diva-von-teese]

Dita Von Teese by Franz Szony

[heyjoshheytyler]

sideways scene (x)

[album1700]

“have you met my friend daniel he walks like this”

IM DYING

[ragethegemini]

WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY

[elisparklequeen]

The way they all fell down.

[marauders4evr]

“WHAT HAPPENED TO MY WINDOW?”

[namelessgoat96]

😂

[melonmemes]

Assignments. Follow melonmemes on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/realmelonmemes

[oreomcfurries-deactivated201805]

if youre ever having a bad day please remember party rock is in the house tonight everybody just have a good time and we gon make u lose your mind we just wanna see u shake that

[bewareofthecar1966]

i respect and admire tumblr’s determination to make 2018 a good wholesome year with all the positive vibes being sent out, but i am but a humble man, and i have Both of my knives in Both of my hands. 2018, dont try shit bitch

[entitledrichpeople]

Homeless people are human beings with immense value.  They are members of our families, communities, neighborhoods, cities, and, for a number of people reading this, they are themselves (or have been).

The fact that homeless people do not have housing is a wrong done against them, not a sign they did something wrong.  To then try and ban them from public spaces and existing in public (including doing things we all have to do, like sleep or eat), is yet another grievous wrong.

An attack on homeless people is not “protecting the community”, it is an attack on the community.  Homeless people aren’t my enemy, those who would ban them from things like sleeping in public are my enemy.

[xanthein-blog]

person: OMG YOU DIDN'T STUDY FOR THE TEST???!?!?!

me: nope

person: BUT HOW ARE YOU GONNA PASS???

me: i'm not

[bpdbroken]

i just hate how impulsively extroverted i get when i’m out in public or around people i want to impress, because the second i’m alone all i can think about is how annoying they probably thought i was or how i dumb i sounded

[vivienvalentino]

Everything is shit and the world might be on the verge of nuclear war.

Bruno Mars: *releases another 80s/90s sounding bop* 

Everyone: