W E B H E A D   J R.

indie. may "mayday" parker. private & selective. written by aimee. not spiderverse compliant.

[totallycalmtotallycool]

“Burning pancakes is a punishable offence. You don’t even want to know the story.”

[xcantbreakme]

             ❛ well now that you say that, i HAVE to know. ❜

[itakeaftermymother]

“If you’re eating greasy Chinese food, you’re going to the wrong Noodle Palace.”

[xcantbreakme]

       ❛ that would explain a lot. ❜

[totallycalmtotallycool]

“Watch yourself, Parker. I smell smoke that isn’t  tinged with bacon, and you’re the first person on my list. I don’t care how good you are at chemistry.”

[xcantbreakme]

      ❛ okay but what if it’s like, pancakes or something ? ❜

[clawinkitten]

   “Listen whippersnapper-     if you’re running around my ceiling, breaking my rules then I’m your huckleberry, ya hear? What happened and why.”

[xcantbreakme]

              ❛ who said there was any RULE BREAKING involved ? ❜

[tsrgifs]

[xmarksthescott]

@xcantbreakme

 ❛I’m no interior decorator but how ugly would the room look with this picture here? Don’t ask me…Kitty wants it up somewhere.❜

[xcantbreakme]

            ❛ we could CONVENIENTLY “lose” it in a               dumpster and pretend we don’t know what               happened to it. ❜

[spiderblooded-blog]

    ❛I could say the same to you. Never thought I’d have to get the costume trademarked. Really? The webhead look? Is nothing sacred anymore.❜

[xcantbreakme]

            ❛ it’s called a creative license, old man. ❜

[itakeaftermymother]

“What do you have in mind?”

[xcantbreakme]

        ❛ pizza is at the top of the list, but i wouldn’t say            no to chinese food, either. ❜

[citystarlet]

 ❛    ——–who got you the yellow dress? i would never buy you a YELLOW DRESS. we’re throwing that out ; here, give it to me. ❜  

[xcantbreakme]

             ❛ i’m pretty sure it was dad. it looks like one of his                 TRAGEDIES. take it, i won’t tell if you don’t. ❜

[itakeaftermymother]

“You got it.”

[xcantbreakme]

         ❛ weeelllll, i could go for something really            greasy and unhealthy, for starters. ❜

[foreverothtrash-blog]

[totallycalmtotallycool]

“Hypothetically speaking, I would phase your head into that wall behind you. Super hypothetically, though.”

[xcantbreakme]

       ❛ yikes. i guess it’s a good thing that was          only HYPOTHETICAL, huh ? ❜

[xcantbreakme]

❉ │ CLOSED STARTER: @spectacularpeter​ | starter call

             ❛ have you ever heard the expression: STAY IN                YOUR LANE ? because you need to do that, like                p r o n t o.❜

[xcantbreakme]

❉ │ CLOSED STARTER: @incxndia | starter call

              ❛ okay, in your EXPERT opinion, which of  these looks                 better; the red or the blue ? there’s this sinful yellow                 thing too but let’s not talk about that one. ❜

[deadsolo-moved-deactivated20160]

my dad has a folder on his computer named Cool Dad and it’s just pictures of himself

[xcantbreakme]

❉ │ CLOSED STARTER: @clawinkitten​​​ | starter call

               ❛ this isn’t what it looks like. ❜

[xcantbreakme]

❉ │ CLOSED STARTER: @totallycalmtotallycool​​​ | starter call

        ❛ okay, so, HYPOTHETICALLY speaking ---- and i mean           super, super hypothetically ---- if someone were to set           the chemistry lab on fire, what kind of punishment would           that entail ? hypothetically speaking. ❜