When I think about it....
I'm not regret being holic at all.
The journey has been fun. It was just like riding a roller coaster. Except it's an emotional one.
I remember the day I "found" them.
It's April 2018 and I was in love with Win Morisaki since I watched Ready Player One. Then I became curious about him, just like typical fans out there. Turns out that he is a member of a Japanese boygroup/boyband.
Aku nggak pernah "ngidol" sebelumnya. Ngidol di sini maksudnya yg suka sama idol dan beneran ngikutin banget dan sangat berdedikasi buat mereka. Not even K-POP. I'm not a K-POP-ers.
It was Orange Moon MV that turns my heart completely into them.
It was Lonely Summer Days MV that made me stay from then until now.
Then on June 25th, 2018 when Tim announced his withdrawal....
Saat itu aku lagi diklat dan sebenarnya tidak berniat buat buka medsos sama sekali. Namun saat itu tiba-tiba iseng buka website mereka. And then I found there was a picture with only four of them. Then I read the announcement. I was dumbfounded.
Things has never been the same since that day.
Tim pergi tanpa alasan jelas seminggu setelah konser Level 7 ~Fusion~. Aku yang baru kenal PrizmaX dan sedang berusaha mengenal dan menyayangi mereka, gak mungkin bisa move on karena aku akan terus menelusuri jejak memori mereka selama ini.
Aku nggak bisa nangis selama ±8 bulan.
Aku marah besar ketika PrizmaX ngumumin bakal ngadain audisi buat member baru.
Aku marah saat member baru diumumkan.
I'm not a good fan. Am I even allowed to call myself a Holic?
Then again, after all the changes they've made, I found myself really loved the new PRIZMAX.
I love Kevin's soothing voice and funny personality. Heck, he's the mighty memelord!
I love Fumi's attitude toward fans. He often held a reply party on his twitter account. He's the one who lived up PRIZMAX's AmeBlo. He posts in the blog literally everyday. He developed his acting skill on some butais too. And he's always see all of instastory which tagging him on Instagram recently, like, he literally has seen all of them!
I love Hide too, obviously. He's so cool and handsome. He's the tallest among members despite being the youngest. His hairstyle is amazing (he wants to be a hairdresser). His instagram feeds is so neat, while he's always posting some magic-comedy short video on his Twitter account.
I love his photo and video with Kevin, I love the way they teased fans about their relationship. I love the way Kevin calls him Hide when others call him Mori. I love the way Hide calls him Kebinbin. I'm a HideKebi shipper!
It was late June 2019 when PRIZMAX announced that Live Level 8 ~Circus~ will be broadcasted on niconico. I was very happy back then. It was a major development for them reaching out people who can't attend their concert on site. It was about the time I'm commited to try to attend their live in Japan. I started saving for them. And when they announced that Level 9 will be held in Dec 2019, I was so sad because I can't left my work at all in December.
It was August 2019 when they announced that they'll participate in Asian Idol Music Festival in Pattaya, Thailand! I was planning to go there, but then I realized I might have not enough money to go there. I've planned to go to Japan in the first place, so I decided to not going to Thailand.
It was October 2019 when I notice there was something wrong with them. There's no information about 2020 calendar release. They announced that they will release a new single, but the details about the new single was posted very late.
It was November 2019 when PRIZMAX announced Yuuki's withdrawal. I was at work when I read the news and my eyes were full of tears. That day, I regret not going to see them in Thailand.
It was December 2019 when I was wondering desperately about the new single 愛をクダサイ's MV. The MV was released only some days before the new single released. Live Level 9 has been decided to be broadcasted on niconico too. All the members were crying when they sang Kizuna on the encore. I was crying too.
It was January 10th 2019 when they announced Live Level 0 ~FINAL~ and their disbandment. I was pretty shocked.
In the beginning, I've said that I'm not regret being holic. The journey was painful but they managed to made me and holics happy too.
As for myself, I was motivated to learn Japanese because of them. I met some holics online and they all were literally angels! They were so kind to me even if I speak broken english and japanese. I was motivated to go to concert because I want to meet all the holics in person too.
I was able to make friend to some local friends who were holics too! I can't believe there were some holics too in Indonesia. We had a WhatsApp group, I made a fanbase Instagram account, and our circle was able to get bigger!
I ... just wondering if they can undo their announcement they posted yesterday.
Or cancel their decision to disband, maybe?