To You, From Me

Behind all my social media, the truth comes out.

[2you-4me]

This past week has felt amazing with you. I can’t see anyone else beside you in my life. You are truly my bestfriend, my boyfriend, my soulmate. Their is no ifs or buts about you, your perfect in my asian squinting eyes. 😝 I cherish second we are together even those small disagreements we have, it makes us stronger. I love you so so much babe, you mean the world to me, you mean everything to me, like I’ll take a bullet for you, because I can't imagine a life without you. I'm in love with you La Don, truly head over heals for you😍

[2you-4me]

I'm incredibly happy with him. Words can't explain my feeling towards him. 12-13-14 💕💋

[2you-4me]

Nov 6th 11:27pm

So I saved your message when you explained to me about how your scared of commitment and everything, I kept it to remind myself when I feel doubts about us. That we still have a chance. But of course, It didn’t take long for the feeling to come back.

When we talked last time, you talked about … how you are not ready to open up to me, I remember that you wanted to say something but instead you said something like “ I’m not comfortable talking about it with you” for some reason that hurt me. I feel like I’m doing something wrong, I’m trying my best to show you that you can open up to me and I will do same. I’m scared that, what if that never happens, scared we won’t make that connection, scared you will find someone that you can talk about anything with and realized that our connection isn’t there.

I also been feeling I'm not enough for you. Relationship are suppose to challenge one another to do better. Cliché as it is, but you bring the best out of me, you make me want to do better. I feel like I have nothing to offer you, got nothing to bring to the table Tbh. Sometime I wonder what I mean to you.

[2you-4me]

Tbh

I kinda see where this is going, I'll make it less confusing for you, you clearly have second thoughts about me and Im not going to waste my time with that. You probably have to figure out yourself first before anything else tbh I don't think this is not going to workout, I've been through this before and tbh it's a game, going back and forward...of not know what you want , have no time or patience for that sorry

[2you-4me]

12:00am oct 30 2016

Committing? Or in general the future ? I see you as a person that I can spend my life with but I don’t know if that goes the same for you. It hurts me when I imagine a life without you. You really mean a lot to me and don’t think you know how much you mean to me sometimes. I hate feeling like this, like I don’t matter or something. Crying over you is not worth the confusion in my head. We talk about this before on how we are not labeling this relationship or whatever this is, saying this isn’t the right time but sometimes their is no such thing as the right time, life doesn’t come with guarantees. Even now and then, you just have to take a chance. And I don’t think you wanna take it with me. You have all my attention la don, but I don’t think I got yours. In the beginning i understand where we both were coming from but now I feel like I'm playing the waiting game. I can't just wait in hopes you see me more as a person you like

[2you-4me]

Preparing

Everything is going great. Time spent with you is amazing but when we’re not in the same room together, I always have to wondering where this is going. People comment and say “your boyfriend” to me and I always have to say no… we’re just friends. And now it’s to a point that I just don’t care if they use that label, I’m tired of explaining myself. I just want to call you mine. Sometime I feel like I’m waiting for this thing we have to be over with, maybe I’m preparing myself for the worst . So, at the end… I won’t have my heart broken as hard.

[2you-4me]

Can’t really upload this everywhere else:\ We agree to take things slow

[2you-4me]

Why?

We've gotten so close. So why do I feel this way? I'm scared this "relationship" isn't gonna go as far as I hope. Is it because of your new job? Im probably overthinking this but there is a reason why. I really like you, I love you. Even though we said it to each other, I feel it's dying. The meaning of it. I'll see in the next couple of weeks. Because I know you have school and work and you're going to be busy. I understand that. I just don't want nothing to change between us.

[2you-4me]

September 1,2016

So before our class together, you invited me to your place. Wasn’t sure how to react but I really wanted to see your dog so I came over. We “watched” movies. He was being so distracted, I couldn’t even follow the story line. After that, we went up stairs to your room and talked and cuddle and smooch a little. Got to class, did our thing and went to grab yummy tacos!

[2you-4me]

August 30,2016

Second day of class, it was awesome. Got to know more about you and how cheesy you are. Love that you think your so funny even thought you’re not. lol After class, you showed me your motorcycle and DAMN… It was sexy. Your phone die so you wanted me to have your, so of course I said yes:)

PS: The next day, you “visited” me at school but had to leave for work later. I was sad. :(

[2you-4me]

August 25, 2016

So, the first day I met you and I have to admit, you were pretty cute. You seem like a nice guys and I remembered you invited me to sit down with you guys. Once class was over, I kinda wanted to wait for you, but thought it was weird since it was the first day I met you. So, I left.... Sad. Lol

[2you-4me]

To: My Friend

I'm sorry, I don't think it's cool that you grabbed my face and gave me a kiss without my permission. In my opinion that was kind of selfish. I didn't want to be rude and push you away. I know it was a harmless kiss and props for trying. I think I was leading you on and I'm sorry. I think we can still be friends but i don't know now, because that kiss. Wasn't even a good kiss. Wet and sloppy. Harsh but true.

[2you-4me]

To: My Crush

Like I said before. We’re just friends. But…Of course I want to be more. But if not, at least show me you care for me, like a friend. The tacos, the Thai food, Star Trek, and the time we just hang out at school. Those were all good times. I have no clue what you think of me. I’m tired trying to make the effort to talk to you and make plans. Yeah I know you have your own life. But it would be nice if you start the conversation. I alway have to talk to you first. And sometimes you don’t even respond back. I really like you. TBH, I haven’t had a crush like this in a long time. Wow I feel lame just saying that. LOL

[2you-4me]

To: A special someone

I feel like we're strangers. But it makes sense though. I broke your heart and you kinda broke mine. These night, I wish u were here, so you can listen to my problems like a friend would do. But you're not. I feel like I got nobody.

[2you-4me]

To: Myself

Don’t get butt hurt when he isn’t replying to you. He’s not into you. I know you can’t help it. You want to message him but don’t want to sound annoying. School is around the corner. You’ll find someone

[2you-4me]

To: A Friend

It really sucks, I know you’re not into me like I’m into you. Trying to distract myself with other guys. But always find myself thinking of you. Just want you to know, I would drop those guys in a heart beat for you. We’re good friends