Tackling ARFID

a side blog about my experiences having avoidant-restrictive food intake disorder

[achingarfid]

I recently moved to a whole new town and state and I moved in w two people but I didn’t realize how terrifying it’d be to go grocery shopping and bring food home to our shared kitchen. Like I’m not even at the grocery store yet and I’m already crying thinking about it. I’m trying to remind myself that everyone eats food, everyone goes grocery shopping…. But for some reason my stupid Ed brain thinks it’s embarrassing and that everything I eat is embarrassing and I just don’t want them to say anything. I’m just so scared they’re going to judge me for the food I eat.

[achingarfid]

The relief I feel after thanksgiving is finally over and the intense pressure around food has lessened ☺️😌😌🥰

But then I remember that Christmas is semi-food centered and that’s coming up and now I realize I will never be calm ever

[lotsarecoverymemes]

[achingarfid]

Thanksgiving is a month away and I'm already anxious about it lol

[achingarfid]

Lol when you go through the day without eating bc you completely forgot bc you rarely feel hunger bc food is nearly irrelevant to you. Ha ha. Ha

[achingarfid]

Does anyone else not feel accepted by the Ed community bc arfid isnt a "normal" Ed?

[arfid-ace]

*at a restaurant with people*

Me: *only ever gets one thing here*

Me: *opens menu anyway*

[achingarfid]

I hate having such a horrible relationship with food. I hate not getting food when I'm out with friends simply because I've never eaten around them before and I'm too terrified to order. Even though my stomach was growling and I was actually hungry for once.

I hate almost passing out everyday and having extreme stomach pain because eating anything before 5pm makes me feel physically sick.

I hate grocery shopping and making food when my roomates are around. I hate going to restaurants and having to order off the kids menu or ask for something extremely modified.

I want to eat like a normal human being, I want to get excited about food. I want to like mixed foods and sauces, I want to enjoy Thanksgiving and other big meals. I want to not have panic attacks over food.