Actually, It's Strawberry-Blonde

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

https://soundcloud.com/kyliehughesmusic/11-i-cant-believe-were-in-love

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

https://soundcloud.com/kyliehughesmusic/we-got-heat-demo

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

When you are a little girl, you dream about true love and all of its facets and fantasies. You dream about prince charming and his silvery white horse that may or may not have wings and be named cotton candy or star dust. You dream about your wedding day and how everything will be covered with roses and everyone you love will be smiling at you with their camera phones, so happy but also so jealous that you get happily ever after. You dream about the vows you will make that day, to have and to hold til death do you part. The beautiful dress you picked out that makes you look like a wedding cake, makes your boobs look perfect and your butt awesome. You’ve named all of your ten make believe.. puppies, or children...

You never ever think that, maybe, Prince charming doesn’t show up that day. You never ever fathom that the promises he made about you living in his castle and taking holidays to his other castles were just lies. That the vow you made to love each other unconditionally was just superficial and in the moment. You never ever think that the horse he was riding was really just a jack ass. You never ever think that the love story about how you met just happened to be him stumbling into the right place and the right time and taking advantage of your vulnerability. 

You never ever think that when you met, you were actually at the wrong place at the wrong time and you set yourself up for the biggest heart break by not reading the signs. You promise never ever to get swept up in the motions again, to never ever fall for a faux prince. To never ever give your heart away so quickly. To never ever put that wedding carriage before the six drawn horses.

Because how dare anyone not love you with their whole heart. It’s unbelievable that anyone would ever let you go, do they know who you are?! But you realize you dodged a bullet. You realize you’re better off on your own. You realize that love isn’t stumbled upon or materialize out of thin air. You work for love and you fight for it. But for you, you promise to never ever love again.

Well... Good luck with that.

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

Lil Mermaid + Lil Ursula

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

Happy Valentine's Day

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

It Still Hurts, more than i'll admit

And I still cry, though I wanna quit

And it still burns, remembering every lie

I still love you, though I don't know why...

And this is me, standing open heartedlyAnd this is me, at your feet longingly

And I've been scratching and fighting to find myself again

And I keep looking and missing what it means to start again

The pain keeps pounding and breaking and knocking me down again and again and again

I've been screaming in silence for you ever since

You're still here, in pictures on the wall

I still wait, but you never call...

And this is me, smaller than I've ever felt

And this is me, left with the hand that I've been dealt

And I've been scratching and fighting to find myself again

And I keep looking and missing what it means to start again

The pain keeps pounding and breaking and knocking me down again and again and again

I've been screaming in silence for you ever since

But God it's you, holding me up when I fall down

And it's you, I can throw my arms around

And I've been waiting and praying to finally understand

That I was growing, not knowing, you carried me in your hands

The pain was pounding and breaking and knocking me down again and again and again

It still hurts but I'm stronger in the end.

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

It Still Hurts

Sometimes, when something hurts us, we know how to fix it. 

We know how to make ourselves feel better. 

There’s a cure, there’s an answer. 

But sometimes, really deep kinds of “hurt”… can’t be put into words. 

There is no way to express the pain or even the source. We just hurt all over and we don’t understand why bad things happen or what we did to deserve it to happen to us.

Coincidently, I wrote this song “It Still Hurts” a while ago and came across it over a year later as I was dealing with a lot of hurt in my life.

It’s funny how a song written about one thing was maybe written all along to describe my current pain. Never has a song been more relevant to me than this year, this hour, this broken relationship and this heartache. Especially in a situation so out of my control, so blindsiding and so hurtful. 

However, change takes time and time brings change. When we get knocked down, it's more about how we get back up. I’ve grown up a lot in a year. I’ve gotten stronger in a year. I see the world less in black in white and more in shades of gray (not 50) ;). I give people more grace than I did before and maybe.. maybe the pain has made me a more dynamic and interesting person? Maybe there’s a silver lining.

Either way, I’m a work in progress. I’m healing, but…

it still hurts.

-ky

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

View this post on Instagram

Hello 2016,

2015 was kind of a bitch and I’m about to tell you why.

Coming Soon.

“It Still Hurts”

xx, Kylie

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

Let's go.

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

Uh oh no no

[wanderlog]

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

Nashville Day 1

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

This is what makes us girls We all look for heaven and we put love first- Something that we'd die for It's our curse. Don't cry about it. This is what makes us girls We don't stick together because we put love first. Don't cry about him. It's all gonna happen

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

Summer Summer Summer

[twentysomethin-blog]

Two of my idols, 3 feet of fresh, the Austrian Alps, one roll of super 8mm.

[actuallyitsstrawberryblonde]

Is it winter yet?