Last Night as 33.
Dramatic title? Of course. Preserving my youth by being dramatic! Another interesting year. Onto 34. Almost entering a different age bracket. Yikes. I feel like this is the last year of my youth. 35 just sounds old, good thing I am turning 34. I feel like 30,31,32 are grouped, and 33/34 are grouped. ( My mind unequivocally processing age ranges) 35 is just old. Stay tuned for my 35 post (It won't be a good one.) 6 years from now I will be in another decade! See how my mind just strips away the good? I am just counting milestones to defeat myself. It projects onto a lot of my dynamics with friends. Anyway, 33? Hm, I wouldn't do it again. Traveling wise I went to Austin for a bachelor party, and the Bahamas with my family. I did not do any other trips, but that is ok. Perhaps next year! I've basically been in my role for about 1 year now. Time flies. It just keeps going. I am not sure how or where I fit in the scale of comparing myself to others, but I know for somethings, I would be on the low end of it. It is way too easy to compare yourself to others. I make a fairly reasonable salary, but in NYC it is absolute trash to get the apartment that I have always envisioned without my entire paycheck going towards rent. Doesn't make sense how people save. My apartment is small, but I would like to host and have people over to create memories with a larger apartment that has city views. It is constantly me going to them because they have the space to accommodate me. I do value all my friends. I have accepted the different paths we are currently in. Sometimes I feel I don't have much in common with them, but is that part of adulting? I have been privy towards new experiences, rather than doing the same things over and over. There is no fulfillment out of it. I have been viewing encounters or experiences as valued time. If I don't see value in it, I am not interested. I used to always peak interests towards things and see the good in them, but lately, I thing I have been strapped thin by all the people who's wasted my time over the years. Getting older is weird. Watching your family and loved ones get older is even weirder. It takes a toll when you have a long day at work and then you are in work mode to keep loved ones around you calm, setting aside your emotions. I don't know If this is how my life is supposed to be, or if this will be my full career, or if this is a stepping stone. I do feel stuck a lot, and I would like to eventually have the courage to have clarity of my life to start making moves. That is one of my goals before 35. Thank you, 33.











