Evil Plant Experiments

I may be [bad at gardening] but I am free

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

Good news! Flowers are starting to grow!!!

Bad news is they are struggling. I might need to move the setup to somewhere with more space.

In other news though, I have decided to try growing... mushrooms!

Oyster mushrooms! I saw a video about how you can use cardboard to do it!

Literally just chop up the stems of mushrooms you buy in the store, seal 'em in a container or plastic bag with (pasteurized) cardboard, and wait like a week.

Pasteurized cardboard it turns out just means cardboard you poured boiling water onto lol

This kitchen has seen many strange things...

I did all that about 2 weeks ago and look at this!

I actually don't know if this one's healthy or not. Internet said the grey color wasn't a major issue but also isn't an amazing sign.

My other spawns went a lot better though:

It all feels a little weird to me since this stuff looks so much like mold. I mean, it's technically the same thing for the most part. But I get a gut-fear feeling whenever I look at it. Wild to think I'm planning to eat the stuff

I'm hoping plastic bags on the rim of this will make a mostly airtight seal. To be extra safe, I'm also keeping all of this outside, in a hopefully cool place.

(Don't wanna risk the mushrooms spreading into the wood of the building itself)

After that I just added more (pasteurized) cardboard and threw in the spawn.

I know people who grow mushrooms are usually FAR more careful than I'm being. I want whatever methods I use to be relatively easy for non-hobyists to pick up. So if it's genuinely not possible to grow mushrooms without being perfectly optimized, I will probably just move on to something else

Updates will continue!

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

The mold has not gone away :(

But the plants seem to be doing alright for now. I was gonna need to switch them to a larger container so I went and did that anyway.

(One of our cats tried to escape into here while I was moving the bucket. The fool! I knows not that The Tube is a dead end!)

Meanwhile I found a zine that taught how to build a different kind of planter by recycling big soda bottle, thought I'd give it a try

It uses the twine as an irrigation system, so it's not entirely not hydroponics (in a way)

Hopefully these little basil plants will grow big and strong

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

Strange things are happening...

This morning I noticed what looked like flower buds starting to grow. Very exciting for the big guy!

But confusing for the other two. I thought they'd have to get bigger before they tried growing fruits.

Maybe I'm about to get mini zucchinis?

Bad news is I noticed mold on the roots when I went to top up the water in the milk jugs.

Tried my best to pull it off but I know it won't really stop the mold once it's started. Not really sure what to do tbh.

For now, I've changed out the water entirely, and I'm hoping for the best

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

It's been about 2 and a half weeks since my last update, and I probably should have been posting more often lol

First of all, LOOK HOW HECKIN BIG IT'S GETTING!

I'll probably have to bring in more grow lights to support this guy.

Meanwhile I've transplanted the other two successful plants into milk jugs and set them up in The Tube. (Don't worry about it)

I was worried they might not get enough sunlight down here, but they do seem to be growing. I'll probably need to get some buckets since the jugs are probably not big enough.

Tragically though, I must report that... some of them didn't make it. 😔

Idk why but some of them got stuck in the seeds and were never able to sprout. Not sure if I did something wrong

Either way, these plants are growing way faster than my previous attempts, so things are mostly looking good!

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

These plants are growing crazy fast! It took like a week for them to germinate but it's only been a few days since then. Zucchini was perhaps a good choice indeed.

I had to transplant the biggest seedling sooner than I anticipated, so the big bubble bucket in my bathroom has become its new home.

I also set up this advanced flexible airlock system to isolate the plant's environment and ensure a high level of sanitation. (I duct taped a big plastic bag to the wall so its not directly exposed to the bathroom lol. Ive only got so much space in the apartment)

So far it seems to be adjusting to the new environment well, so here's hoping that continues!

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

All my plants are dead...

LONG LIVE MY HECKING PLANTS

I'm doing it again! Zucchini this time. I tried to avoid fruiting plants originally, but this genuinely does seem like the easiest way to get lots of food out of gardening, so we'll see how it goes.

Also I will try doing this one fully indoors since the cold weather is what killed the last set of plants.

I was surprised at first that the seeds looked like pumpkin seeds, but ig it makes sense with them both being gourds

Updates will continue 🫡

Don't look up geoduck clams...

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

Finally took a little taste of a small leaf I pruned of the chard. It tasted like lettuce!

As I understand it, the idea that hydroponic plants are flavorless is fairly outdated. Seems like something people fixed a while ago. But I still would use salad dressing for this once it's grown big enough to eat in earnest lol

It continues to get big though!

I also switched the newest seedlings over to their permanent homes. The new contraption seems to work well enough. And in fact the speed these little guys came in makes me think I did something wrong the first time. I will need further experiments to determine the cause

The adventures continue!

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

Attempt #3 update!

So far, so good. The plants are live

Seems like they get a bit confused growing sideways though

My parter's mom keeps giving me actual hydroponics equipment since she used to do this for awhile, so I am obligated to at least try using it.

This is far too good looking for my tastes

Chard seeds are weird as heck though. It's like the plants crawl out of them and leave a big husk behind, so they're kind of struggling in this setup.

Either way, the experiments continue!

[adventures-in-hydroponics]

Just put this side blog together to track all my plant experiments!

[itsdoobly]

Attempt #2.5 update:

All the plants died :(

I have no idea what happened. They were all growing so well right before.

Look at how good they were doing!

These were taken genuinely days before their sudden and total death. (I wish I'd taken pictures of how utterly dry and shriveled they were)

Welp! Onto the next attempt

Attempt #3 of my incredibly scuffed experiments with hydroponics!

So what we think happened is that lettuce

A- does not actually want a huge amount of sun (I was lied to) and

B- likes it a little on the cool side. We got a pretty massive heatwave recently, and that's probably what killed 'em.

Apparently lettuce is also one of the hardest plants to garden, so that's my own hubris at fault.

Next I'm trying something supposedly easier: Swiss Chard

They're heckin rainbow colored!

The seeds were really weird looking, and while the plants apparently grow fast, the seeds took a strangely long time to germinate.

Genuinely it took over a week before anything even started to grow.

But I've got them set up fully now, and they seem to be growing up quite fast! We'll see if third time really is the charm

[itsdoobly]

Attempt number 2.5 update!!

Grow light fell on the plants :(

I really thought it had killed them for a while there. But in retrospect I think me reacting by panicking and setting them up in newer better containers (milk jug) did more damage than the grow light did.

Transplant shock still happens when it's all just water apparently

Good news is, they recovered! Now the milk jug is outside and the lettuce is growing faster than ever

Meanwhile I began attempt number 3 of my evil experiments in urban gardening.

Behold, the swarm:

They live in my closet now :)

And uh...

I don't know what I did wrong the first time but these guys are growing way faster than the last attempt

Shutout to monster energy. Idk what you did to your cans, but the monster can lettuce grew the fastest

Anyway I probably need to transplant these guys to something bigger soon, so I will update on how that goes eventually.

Godspeed fellow plant enjoyers 🫡

[itsdoobly]

Attempt #2.5 update:

All the plants died :(

I have no idea what happened. They were all growing so well right before.

Look at how good they were doing!

These were taken genuinely days before their sudden and total death. (I wish I'd taken pictures of how utterly dry and shriveled they were)

Welp! Onto the next attempt

Attempt #3 of my incredibly scuffed experiments with hydroponics!

So what we think happened is that lettuce

A- does not actually want a huge amount of sun (I was lied to) and

B- likes it a little on the cool side. We got a pretty massive heatwave recently, and that's probably what killed 'em.

Apparently lettuce is also one of the hardest plants to garden, so that's my own hubris at fault.

Next I'm trying something supposedly easier: Swiss Chard

They're heckin rainbow colored!

The seeds were really weird looking, and while the plants apparently grow fast, the seeds took a strangely long time to germinate.

Genuinely it took over a week before anything even started to grow.

But I've got them set up fully now, and they seem to be growing up quite fast! We'll see if third time really is the charm

[itsdoobly]

Attempt number 2.5 update!!

Grow light fell on the plants :(

I really thought it had killed them for a while there. But in retrospect I think me reacting by panicking and setting them up in newer better containers (milk jug) did more damage than the grow light did.

Transplant shock still happens when it's all just water apparently

Good news is, they recovered! Now the milk jug is outside and the lettuce is growing faster than ever

Meanwhile I began attempt number 3 of my evil experiments in urban gardening.

Behold, the swarm:

They live in my closet now :)

And uh...

I don't know what I did wrong the first time but these guys are growing way faster than the last attempt

Shutout to monster energy. Idk what you did to your cans, but the monster can lettuce grew the fastest

Anyway I probably need to transplant these guys to something bigger soon, so I will update on how that goes eventually.

Godspeed fellow plant enjoyers 🫡

[itsdoobly]

Attempt number 2.5 of my incredibly scuffed indoor gardening experiments:

This new seed sprouting method seems to be yielding results way faster than the last 2. (Attempt #1 just killed the seeds instantly)

The last surviving plants from attempt 2 seem to not be dying. Sadly one of our cats is now officially a plant murderer.

[itsdoobly]

Plant update:

To my dismay, it looked like the seeds instantly started growing mold, but it seems I was mistaken. My mom had the same thing happen, but the little fuzz balls are apparently part of the plant!

In other news I have decided to build a new contraption. I call it the Bubble Bucket:

The idea is that getting more air into the roots is good for the plant, so big bucket of water + aquarium air rocks should = even bigger plants!

Now, I always see hydroponics people using these special drill bits to easily cut holes in things, but i have this $10 knife I got from Microcenter so I'm using that instead.

It's perfect. I did a good job✨️

Originally I didn't want to get in the habit of using grow lights, but it turned out my parter's mom already had some lying around so use them I shall.

My bathroom is ourple now

[itsdoobly]

Attempt number 2.5 of my incredibly scuffed indoor gardening experiments:

This new seed sprouting method seems to be yielding results way faster than the last 2. (Attempt #1 just killed the seeds instantly)

The last surviving plants from attempt 2 seem to not be dying. Sadly one of our cats is now officially a plant murderer.