✞ / this is prayer, right? @agrievousfault - Tumblr Blog

A Look.

#this is prayer / right? i fall & i drown & i trash & i burn.#abandons Tumblr completely #comes back to reblog my son #/disappears again

marcus.

there’s a stillness, for a moment, smile draining slowly away like a leak in a fish thank. not entirely sure what to do with you look good, so he shrugs, rolls his shoulders, sinks back and takes a long drink. ‘ yeah, well. time served looks good on me. ’ beat. ‘ most people lose weight when they go to prison. — you got grey. love the beard. ’

he said something wrong. ( the wrong way; hell is paved with good intent, ortega. ) the shift in marcus’ face is impossible to miss and tomas has to resist the urge to scramble and fix what he messed up. his fingers curl a little tighter around his own mug. the contents inside are likely to turn cold before he drinks.

“ -- that’s not what i ...” a pause, he sighs. it’s not how he meant it to come out. but what’s done is done, right? “si? you like it? my nephew tells me i look distinguished. my sister says i look like a caveman. the grey, well -- it’s been a long few years in chicago.” since everything.

#excommune #v. / our minds are troubled by the emptiness ( verse unknown. )#ignore my lack of icons |: I need to make more for him.

marcus.

he can’t tell if chicago just feels different or if it actually is different, but tomas’ apartment is the same, and tomas feels the same, even if he’s suddenly much greyer around the edges. ‘ and here i thought i was gonna have my first decent cuppa for two years, ’ he says, all wry smiles, fingers curled around the warm mug. ‘ more fool me. is this herbal? ’ he’s teasing.

@agrievousfault.

he should be embarrassed. marcus is here -- again ( more like finally ) -- and it’s like time stood still as far as his apartment shows. it didn’t, though. life goes on. tomas snorts, a soft sort of sound, and lifts his own cup. “it’s my grandmother’s special recipe, which means it might have vicks vapor rub in it.” it’s a joke at his own expense, because what else can he say?

“you look ... good, marcus.” maybe not at peace, but different. it’s nice to see him outside of prison. it’s nice to know he isn’t there.

nice; what a horrible word for all of this.

#excommune #tbh same; I don't know what number we're on slkdfjaksd.#v. / our minds are troubled by the emptiness ( verse unknown. )#>8c

thegoblincities

( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

#this is prayer / right? i fall & i drown & i trash & i burn.#white light tears from wet thunderclouds - that's you / marcus.#we wear the dangerous looseness of doom ( it's becoming ) / excommune.#i miss my idiot.#but i'm having fun on deanna and tomas needs a break skjdfksd.

idk why I do this after I sign off the desktop, but tomas and his "need to matter/need to be the best" complex started when he was young. because he was always almost there. always second best. always really good, but someone was better or mattered more so he was in the shadows. and it isn't so much of an ego thing as it is just... this need to have something to call his own. something he can say / know without a doubt that he's good at. that people can be proud of him for. something to make him memorable. make him real. and that's a huge part of why he acts the way he does when he first gets the visions and that's why he tries to tell himself he's chosen by God. and that's why he does stupid shit because he has to be right and he has to prove himself. to everyone, but mostly to himself. and it's always just out of his reach.

#hc.#i know he is a mess and he fucks up so much.#i know his pride is AWFUL and there is no excuse for that djfjdjs #but ik he's lonely and he wants to matter and he wants to help #and leave his mark on the world. but he would settle with being memorable to a few people too #and just. dkxjxjas idk where these tag rambles were going.

🐍

#rook / ooc.#mobile.#i was gonna get on but i had a ... really really rough rehearsal.#and i kind of want to just... idek.#i will be on tomorrow.#i dont have rehearsal tomorrow; so there is that.#thanks for the patience and yah.

I'm mobile so this is gonna look ugly af, but to piggyback off a similar post @excommune just made about thex being cancelled: tomas means a lot to me??? I have been writing for a really long time and he's the first muse I've had that's connected to my culture and that I can relate to when it comes to my cultural background. and yes. I have done that with other characters now ( took them and made them part of me ), but tomas was the first mainstream media muse for me. to see latinx representation as a lead of a show was amazing, but then it turned to shit. and they brought up ugly stereotypes about mexican men and the latinx community and I'm not???? here for that??? beyond that, they started to turn their characters of color into a plot device. villinazing their strong woman of color ( like she was gonna weaponize tomas and use him according to jerslater and his "what could have been in s3" be and I'm not fucking here for that. so, yeh. I'm relieved I can write tomas with people I trust and give him a background that isnt made up of disgusting racial stereotypes and cultural appropriations out of convenience.

when i get online ( probably tonight ), I'm gonna start typing up all the headcanons I have for him that I havent posted because I didnt want canon to fuck me over more than it was already doing.

anyway, yes. this is my schpeel about my boy.

#rook / ooc.#mobile.#psa.

HELLO, HI. I would like to officially introduce you all to my oc, tomas ortega.

#rook / ooc.#mobile.#thank god hallelujah zjxjcjzj

weardes

#this is prayer / right? i fall & i drown & i trash & i burn.#fanart.#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

estrellasombra

the slant of morning light made him look like he was about to catch on fire. ( insp. )

#this is prayer / right? i fall & i drown & i trash & i burn.#we wear the dangerous looseness of doom ( it's becoming ) / excommune.#in honor of eli reading the book that destroyed me last summer.#HAVE THIS I MADE BY BEING INSPIRED BY IT GJFJXJS #mobile.#fuck; gotta reread it now.

gutrage-archive-deactivated2024

foxdies:

writing a new post because the other is a bit dated now.

hi, my name’s danny, i’m trans, mentally ill (bipolar, anxiety, depression), physically ill, and living in an abusive household. i dont get to eat as much as i should be eating due to government fund cuts (our foodstamps and my benefits, specifically, which have been completely taken from me). not eating is bad for both me and my dad, as i have POTS syndrome, endometriosis, and borderline diabetes, and my dad has heart problems and diabetes.

i was going to go to new york this month for school and was denied the final thing i needed to attend: the last loan which would have covered my price completely. there’s no supplement available that could have covered the price so i was forced to withdraw and i’m being forced to stay with my dad for another 4 months to a year, i dont know, i have to look into local enrollment and see when that opens.

so as a result, i’m still not eating, i still don’t have food. if you have any spare cash you can comfortably give, my paypal is [email protected] and i have a google wallet, that email is [email protected]. if you want a doodle or graphics in return, please contact me to work out a price.

graphic example, art examples.

hi, um, while this is still a concern for me, my biggest concern right now is transitioning. i need like 11 thousand dollars, the only surgeon in my area charges 10,880. while i highly doubt anyone here can accumulate even a scintilla of that, if every person following me was able to spare 10 dollars, i’ve have 800~ shy of what i need. and that’s ENORMOUS.

if you can spread this – to people who might be able to – that would mean. everything to me. i’ve hit a breaking point with my transness; our state rescinded trans health care so i have no other options.

#signal boost.

tomas doesn’t like his nephew’s father, but he loves luis and he loves his sister.

he and his sister don’t agree when it comes to matters of religion. this has never stopped her from letting luis go see his uncle’s sermons.

olivia has never approved of jessica, but she wanted her brother happy and if that meant that he went back on his vows, she was going to support him. ( this doesn’t have to do with the onscreen jessica encounter we see. it’s the offscreen stuff when she sees her letters. )

olivia packs luis a healthy lunch and / or dinner for when tomas babysits him, but she knows that he tosses it out and her brother gives in and gives him junk food.

he would never say it, but he harbors some resentment towards olivia because when their family fractured, she got the side that seemed ‘ greener. ‘ ( he never takes this out on her. )

they bicker like siblings, but the longest they fought was for two weeks and then tomas showed up to her work and started loudly singing a church hymn to embarrass her.

#hc.#and i s2g if the show is renewed and they do something to olivia or luis for the sake of ' angst ' or some shit #i will scREAM #anyway; yes. have some ortega hc's.#well; siblings and nephew.

“ -- you aren’t real.” he sounds more sure of himself than he actually is. is this a dream? a vision? what kind of sign could be sent from god that involves talking raccoons? ( once upon a time god was a burning bush, tomas wars with god isn’t the one that works in mysterious ways. ) for a brief moment, it’s hard not to imagine he’s fallen into hell. tomas blinks; twice for good measure, brow pinched and head already throbbing just at his temples. he’s still there. demons are one thing, this -- this is --

“are you?” // @fabricatie

#fabricatie #fabricatie01.#v. / this holy ground burns my feet ( main. )#as promised |:#out of all our ideas; this is the greatest.