A bleak soda-free future

"The future sucks." Indie RP/ask blog for Future Edd from Eddsworld. Main blog is deathofamemer, art is my own unless otherwise stated. Please look at the various pages before interacting. Icon by infectois. Current M!A: None Current Event: None. About/Rules/Verses/Mun

[agrimfuture]

hehe old man hehe needs a cane looking ass hehe fallen and cant get up acting ass

“I’m not even forty! ...probably?” He shrugs. “Time travel is confusing.” 

[agrimfuture]

Yep. (holds up tennis ball, raptors go wild) Anyways, I gotta go, so, uh... watch the kids for me. (tosses ball at, bolts)

Edd gets covered in raptors and loudly yells. “COME ON, MAN,”

[agrimfuture]

[pyroteckitten] "Haha, you kind of remind me of one of my dads. But smaller, more depressed, and you smell real bad. Maybe you should just take a reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally long nap?"

“Fucking rude. I want a really long nap. A permanent one.”

[agrimfuture]

Also, why haven't you updated my blog, dad?

//SCRAMBLES THROUGH WIND OW 

[agrimfuture]

I built a time machine. It's very, uh, sexy. I also tamed all of these raptors. That one's Connor. (gestures at one hanging off his sleeve) So, uh, very smart. They like tennis. And tragic backstories.

“...Dinosaurs like tennis?” Edd looks... kind of baffled by this encounter. A lot of new information!

[agrimfuture]

What? I know things and stuff. I'm a smart. Uh. Have smarts. I'm more than just my charming good looks and massive muscles.

“...Sure. Sure you do. You remind me of a buff version of Matt.”

[agrimfuture]

so you can time travel right? so have you seen that one timeline where you well, do have kids?

“I don’t tend to go across timelines to see other versions of me. One of me is bad enough as is.”

[agrimfuture]

Well, duh! They did!

Edd stares blankly. “...Dude.”

[agrimfuture]

Of course, cause they descended from 'em.

“...Are you trying to tell me that raptors descended from birds, or am I getting that wrong.”

[agrimfuture]

imagine, if you will, thorfrid being like ugh not you again

//i imagine it, i accept it, grim replies by flipping him off

[agrimfuture]

They're raptors, thank you very much! (is that a fist shaped ship...)

“Same difference. A raptor is a type of bird, I think.” He’s kinda squinting at the ship. This sure is a day he’s having!

[agrimfuture]

Awwww~ didja miss me? :3c

“I very much didn’t, you mischievous little shit.”

[agrimfuture]

you suddenly being alive again makes my head turn

“Trust me, I’d be dead if I could be.”

[agrimfuture]

Hiiii! Remember me? We've had so much fun together over the past few years. Howve you been?

Edd squints. “Yeah, I remember you very clearly. I’m fine. Relatively speaking.”

[agrimfuture]

A very small, very swole man in a vest approaches. He has a flock of teeny raptors with him.

“Are those weird birds?”

[agrimfuture]

The names Rex! Rex Dangervest!

“Is this gonna be a new running joke. I haven’t even seen that movie yet.”

[agrimfuture]

Do you have any children?

“No, I don’t. Kinda busy being on the run, I can barely keep up with the cats.”