Ideas of the Seven Kingdoms

18+ Run by @bleakflamingos 1 prompt = 1 grape for Baelor, please feed him!

[akotskficprompts]

Okey so i said something about flea-bottom with Valyrian traditions in another anonymous prompt and I’ve had more thoughts.

So TL:DR Daemon Targaryen spread Valyrian culture to fleabottom (probably cus he was mad that Viserys married an Andal preaching the seven), so they now hold Valyrian traditions and the language etc etc. The Targaryens on the other hand have lost touch with most of their Valyrian roots cus Baelor the blessed thought them un-godly and burnt like all the books on it.

Okay anyway so ashford happens and Baelor survives- yay! Anyway now I have two ideas

1. Baelor ends up accidentally courting Dunk in the tradition of old Valyria, Dunk therefor is very quick to make his moves on the Prince; Baelor is confused and flustered but happy. (A very fun Crack idea)

2. Dunk starts courting Baelor through Valyrian means and Baelor not knowing that it is in anyway meaning full ends up essentially responding to this with an equivalent to “I accept that you wanna court me, and I’m not outright rejecting you, but you need to step up your game”. Dunk very much tries to do more and more but he always gets pretty much the same response and he can’t figure out why what he’s doing isn’t enough. It gets to the point where his health is seriously affected and he starts to wonder if he was wrong about the prince and he’s just being led on. (So much angst potential, like so so much)

Anyway I should really sleep now, I was literally on my way to falling asleep when this hit me so ye, if it doesn’t make total sense don’t sue me I’m broke. I might have to man up and actually attach my username to these prompts at some point cus otherwise they will probably be kinda nonsensical, if I keep expanding on them, oh well, we shall see…

(Bonus. The Valyrian gods accept Dunks “I’m your man” and Baelors “My man” as wedding vows, Dunk knows this and assumes Baelor does too, he does in fact not. )

I can give you your own tag if you want, as well! Sleep well, creative anon!

[akotskficprompts]

Honestly? It would be really funny if Baelor, known for having a hard on for chivalry and knightly goodness, raised his sons to be the same way! And because Dunk is a True KnightTM, Valaar and Baelor both are pining for him and they both feel terrible about it. We’re talking catholic levels of guilt for wanting this man who is so gentle and good and yet also fierce, because they should be that! They should not be yearning to be the Maiden to Dunk’s Warrior and Valaar is married and Baelor is twenty years older than Dunk and yet….

idk if either ship ever becomes real but they do know each other well enough to understand that that is what’s going on and they can’t look each other in the eyes when Dunk is around

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[akotskficprompts]

not going to lie I thought of this one after your most recent in roses chapter... kiera sneaks away during the tourney and cheats on valarr with tanselle.

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[akotskficprompts]

The Kingsguard haaaaaaate Dunk—not because he’s not a good lad or a good sparing partner but because they were used to shifts protecting Baelor being relatively boring—sure, he’d occasionally sneak out or go too far ahead in the Kings Forest, but he wasn’t anything like Maekar, who was always yelling, or his kids (cough cough Aerion). Sure, Baelor and his sons caused trouble but they never got caught—it never became a problem that made the Kingsguard look bad.

Post Baelor being King and his reign going so well that he doesn’t need to be so secretive about Dunk being his lover? These two are LOUD LOUD. Leave the tower window open, you can hear it on castle grounds LOUD. They’re breaking furniture—Baelor is having extra large furniture made so Dunk can be comfortable and he’s having the Kingsguard carry it up. The Kingsguard are hearing things they do not want to be hearing and yet the silence is worse because that means one of them is being gagged.

Baelor sends them a cask of Dornish wine once a sennight

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[akotskficprompts]

Baelor lives and takes Dunk on as his sworn sword but doesn’t keep him in the Red Keep—he sends him out to do justice out in the world. Kings Landing is pining central—Baelor is secretly commissioning the medical versions of Hozier and Jeff Buckley because he needs something to yearn to. alas, he’s too good a king to ask Dunk to stay ( and by the songs that come back to the Red Keep, Dunk is developing quite the reputation) and Dunk is too sure in his king’s goodness that surely his kindness (custom suit of armour, care packages to keeps Dunk mentions, bandaging his wounds himself and demanding to sit it on his visits with the Maesters) are normal leige lord behavior.

the back and forth is interrupted finally when Baelor hosts a tourney and meets all these other men who are also enamored with Dunk! They fought with him, went hawking with him, sang with him—one of the northerners even came down specifically to give Dunk a custom bear skin he had hunted and prepared for him. Baelor looks at those men and decides then and there that He is the King and he would have his man.

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[akotskficprompts]

Love the idea of, in an ABO AU, Baelor getting revenge of Maekar by being all over Dunk constantly (I’m thinking very Morticia and Gomez like, kissing up his arm, constant heart eyes, etc. ) and having like, a dozen kids with Dunk. Everytime Maekar gets mad and says he doesn’t need to see his brother like this, Baelor reminds him that he and Dyanna were banished to Summerhall because they couldn’t keep their hands to themselves and also, orgasms make his head hurt less so there.

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[akotskficprompts]

Baelor survives Ashford, Dunk goes on to become a knight in service of House Targaryen, etc, etc. Cue Dunk and Baelor doing what they do best, yearning and admiring and making everyone around them uncomfortable with the very obvious pining going on.

But it’s just not progressing anywhere because Baelor always puts the brakes on when things start to get physical. It gets to the point where Dunk starts to wonder if he’s imagining this whole situation ship, until finally Baelor cracks and explains that sometimes he just…can’t finish.

It’s called delayed ejaculation and it’s something Baelor’s struggled with for a long time now. He can get hard but orgasming is very difficult.

It really started with the bedding at his wedding. Baelor hadn’t been with anyone man or woman before because of the Aegon the forth of it all and suddenly everyone is ripping his clothes off and he’s being dragged and laughed at and fondled as he’s pushed naked into a bedroom with a stranger to be intimate with while the entire court listens outside. Baelor’s not even attracted to women, he doesn’t know Jenna, and he dies a little inside when he struggles to perform that night.

Cue a vicious cycle that creates constant pressure to create heirs with someone Baelor’s just not sexually compatible with. He hates it and the humiliation of having to consistently struggle to finish in front of his wife. Jenna doesn’t mock him for it but sometimes he takes so long it ends up hurting her which just makes the problem worst.

By the time Dunk enters the picture Baelor just resigned himself to never doing the do with anyone.

But then this himbo knight shows up and Baelor can’t stop wanting him so, so badly but also he just can’t stand the thought of Dunk finding out.

Cue Dunk doing everything in his power to make Baelor feel comfortable and to make him feel good no matter how long it takes or what he has to do.

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[akotskficprompts]

Dunk is a really really good singer—but he doesn’t perform. He just sings while he works so slowly but surely smallfolk start recognizing him as the gentle giant who can soothe the wildest horses and lull roaring rivers still. Baelor gets possessive and jealous because that’s his man and he’s never heard him sing! But he’s also got that Noble Guilt and can’t just demand Dunk sing for him. Cue increasingly ridiculous schemes (Dunk, Daeron and Kiera all join in) to get Dunk to sing/ overhear him

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[akotskficprompts]

King Baelor is attempting to marry off his eldest nephew (bc Maekar asked) and heads up North for a Stark for Daeron. He takes Dunk bc his personal knight is big, warm, and gives excellent cuddles. Dunk keeps trying to make the king wear more layers because yes, Targaryens can get cold, so can Martell, just wear the damn mittens! Will bribe him with hand feeding grapes.

Daeron gets a front row seat to this, and has running commentary when his bride asks who is the king’s paramour?

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[akotskficprompts]

obsessed with the idea of Jena/Baelor lavender marriage—they’re both gay as hell and good friends who have negotiated something that works politically. They’re so good, in fact, that Valaar doesn’t realize that the ‘romance’ he idolizes in his family’s marriage is in fact friendship; this has exponential consequences. He’s putting Kiera in the Friend Zone without meaning all while wondering why he doesn’t feel closer to his wife and what’s wrong with him, he’s convinced that his father’s interest in Dunk is completely platonic. He hears Baelor praising Dunk for being a true knight—for his strength and courage and thinks about how his father didn’t even ask him to fight at Ashford and he seethes with jealousy. He’s killing Dunk with lasers mentally everything he sees him and is making passive aggressive comments that Dunk takes as friendly overtures (they’re both bad at being bullied/bullying). This ends, of course, with Valaar walking in on them getting down and dirty and immediately wanting to throw himself off a tower

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[akotskficprompts]

We all know Baelor has a pretty voice that makes Dunk melt. But Dunk also has such a pretty voice, I would like to read a fic where it makes Baelor melt and giggle and feel really silly and young again about it.

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[akotskficprompts]

Baelor is OBSSESSED with how large Dunk is--7 feet tall, 260 pounds and built like a damn brick wall. He loves the contrast of being able to cuddle up under his arm, take shade in his shadow and hide behind his shoulders when he doesn't want to talk to people. He especially loves hearing the whispers in the keep about how the Dornish King lets this pinnacle of Westerosi knighthood bed him and the way other knights congratulate Dunk for his 'service' to the crown, wink wink. He takes great joy repeating these rumors to Dunk as he rails his knight into the mattress.

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[akotskficprompts]

Prompt numéro deux for people to sink their teeth into: A Future Tech AU where…

Lords and knights wear mechanised armour called warframes

Ladies wear shimmering metal-like fabrics

Luminescent hair effects exist

Lamps the size of a man’s fist hover in the current

Hoverbikes are made use of more often than not

Mixed with:

Jousts

Dice games

Old-school combat sports like bare-knuckle boxing

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[akotskficprompts]

A Ser Duncan who is much more jaded than in canon, deciding that if he’s going to be put for trial for an act of treason (punching a prince) then speaking some treason surely is allowed, mayhaps he specifically asks Baelor during their midnight chat (TM) if speaking treason is a lesser crime than acting on it, and upon getting confirmation he just goes off about exactly why the entire thing is a classist farce to protect their poor noble egos.

He expected the prince to be angry, or perhaps that he would have no reaction at all. Instead Baelor is very very turned on by this pretty knight, who not only punched his cruel nephew but who is also brave enough to tell the crown prince of the seven kingdoms that he’s being a ass, and all the while being the embodiment of everything a knight is meant to be. Mayhaps Baelor promises to be his champion should he ask for a trial of combat (forgetting that he’s the crown prince and probably shouldn’t do that in the face of this giant that is very pretty, and chivalrous, and noble).

Mayhaps he decides it would be a horrible shame to make this beautiful knight sleep in the cells when he has a perfectly good bed in his commandeered room, one that is most certainly big enough to fit them both very comfortably.

Mayhaps he figures out a way to avoid the trial altogether, or mayhaps he makes it clear from the start who he will side with

Mayhaps I am burdened with an unending stream of different versions of akotsk where ser Duncan gets to be angry about the unfairness of Westeros class system (and where he gets to be wooed by a pretty prince …as a treat).

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[akotskficprompts]

Dunk as the bastard of Naerys and Aemon, he knows cuz of dragon dreams but it isn’t like he can do anything about it, he has no proof and even if he did it would only lend legitimacy to the claim that the king is a bastard so like, yeah he can do nothing with it. How does this affect the plot? Idk, but it probably does

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[akotskficprompts]

Utterly insane and self-indulgent, but long story short Daemon being the “lord of flea-bottom” had a bigger impact and flea-bottom basically became much more centered around old Valyrian culture.

Cue Dunk, a flea-bottom native, meeting the Targaryens at ashford and being baffled by how out of touch they are with their origins (it’s Baelor 1s fault) and accidentally endearing himself to the royal family by just knowing shit about Valyria that he thinks is common knowledge.

Aerion is annoyed to no one’s surprise, Baelor and Maekar are intrigued and endeared- this is a mess but I needed to get it out of my lmao.

(I mostly just think it would be funny if the Targaryens who put such stock in blood are less in touch with Valyrian culture than the common folk they demean and ignore)

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[akotskficprompts]

After Dunk ends up as Baelor's sworn shield, Maekar realizes his brother's personal hedgeknight has absolutely no clothing suitable for court (let alone anything aside from sleeping under trees, in ditches, and sides of roads), and makes it a mission to dress in appropriate attire. Cue Dunk showing up in the latest fashions not just from King's Landing, but also from Sunspear (thanks Martell cousins), Storm's End (no thanks to Lyonel, he's jealous), Highgarden (why), and just about every Warden or Lord Paramount's seat. Much to his and Baelor's delight. Cue fashion show. And then cue getting out of those clothes.

Baelor watches while eating grapes. Then gets eaten by Ser Duncan.

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