Alana Raza

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

[brandon-fowler]

No one even watered my plants while I was away. Sad. 

[alanaraza-blog]

I think people were hoping that you weren't coming back.

[daisy--rad]

You’re a saint, truly.

[alanaraza-blog]

I'm just doing peasants work. So yes, I suppose that is somewhat saintlike. 

[alanaraza-blog]

It's a bad day when you have to photocopy your own sheet music. This is what PA's are for.

[zachtfh]

Food poisoning. I can say like a few normal phrases in a couple of languages but I always feel weird talking to the audience in English and then wondering if they even know  what I’m saying. But they still sing along to the songs, so? True, when are you touring next?

I feel like a lot of people are in hiding after all that drama. Except for like, Rex and Lottie. But they are freaks of nature so.

[alanaraza-blog]

Management thinks we can get the American leg of the tour up by August, but I think that's ambitious. Fingers crossed though.

I couldn't care less about the drama around here. But, whining celebrities make me wanna barf. I've been taking refuge in the studio.

[zachtfh]

It was good, despite the whole getting sick thing and having to cancel two shows… but what can you do? I’m just glad to be back in a country where I know the language. 

But whatever, did I miss anything major in the fabulous life of Alana Raza while I was gone?

[alanaraza-blog]

That would've sucked. Did you have a bug or something? I hate the whole language barrier. I always feel obligated to sing my songs in the dialect or whatever, but I always give up. Still, nothing beats touring.

Not really, I've been AWOL for the past week or so.

[zachtfh]

Yeah the red light district was just calling to me. Kidding. Nah just passing through on the European leg of the tour and happened to stay long enough to observe the Amsterdamian’s weirdo bike riding patterns.

[alanaraza-blog]

Oh, I completely forgot to ask you about your tour! How was it?

[zachtfh]

Not in Amsterdam, literally everyone rides bikes there, they take it really seriously too. Like way to seriously…

[alanaraza-blog]

I'm curious as to why you were in Amsterdam. Were you up to something precarious?

[zachtfh]

I was almost ran over by a overly energetic middle-aged woman on a bike.I kinda have respect for the woman though, like I haven’t been on a bike for so long I probably don’t know how anymore.

[alanaraza-blog]

Bikes are pointless these days. If you've got a car and a chauffeur, they're redundant.

[rexsalah]

But where will we run to? We’ll have to go to Antarctica and live with the penguins and I’m not sure if I’m cut out for that continent - too many rules.

I never joke. Ever. I’m, like, the most serious person I know. 

[alanaraza-blog]

Let's hope the dinosaurs attack in a different lifetime. Leave it to the next generation. 

Please. You're about as serious as I am friendly. 

[rexsalah]

Does that mean that the Alanasaurus is still out there somewhere? Just waiting to kill us all!?

Aw, okay then, I’ll bring my stuff by tonight.

[alanaraza-blog]

She burrowed under the Earth, waiting for her time to shine. Fingers crossed she attacks Australia first right? Gives us time to run.

I still can't tell if you're joking.

[rexsalah]

Still, nobody would care because they were probably really grumpy dinosaurs that killed lots of things.

Hug.

[alanaraza-blog]

How do you think they were extinct? The Alanasaurus went on a rampage.

I think I'd be more resigned to you moving in.

[rexsalah]

Tyrannosaurus Rexes are the best dinosaurs, by the way. Nobody ever heard of an Alanasaurus.

You didn’t answer mine, either.

[alanaraza-blog]

Doesn't mean they aren't real. You wait until some scientist finds the bones of an Alanasaurus, okay.

About moving in or the hug?

[rexsalah]

Alana, I don’t want to know about your experience with genital herpes, thanks.

[alanaraza-blog]

You didn't answer my question, Tyrannosaurus. 

[rexsalah]

There’s no way to politely decline. If you say no, you run the risk of me crying and becoming incredibly depressed, for lack of Alana-hugs. So, I’ll ask again: do you want a hug?

[alanaraza-blog]

Alana-hugs? Is that a new term that catching on. Because if so that's worse than genital herpes. I'm going to ask you a question; do you wish to be kicked in the groin?

[rexsalah]

Do you need a hug?

[alanaraza-blog]

I'm going to politely decline.

[rexsalah]

You’re grumpy.

[alanaraza-blog]

Nope. This is me in a good mood.

[rexsalah]

You don’t wanna see my shirt?

[alanaraza-blog]

Not particularly. Sorry to burst your bubble.