alecto ilse carrow ( 𝕩𝕧𝕚𝕚.𝕣𝕒𝕧𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕝𝕒𝕨.𝕡𝕦𝕣𝕖𝕓𝕝𝕠𝕠𝕕. ) here’s to us, the rotten children: they made us into violence. your bones, your skin, it’s all been turned into ash. here’s to us, those born of violence , turned into a war-ground.
“I find all this timeline stuff fascinating you know.” If by fascinating, one meant an awful headache, nerve-wracking, and an unforgivable break in the set plan of life that introduced far too many variables. “It’s like first year meeting everyone all over again…or like walking into my first day at the Ministry. Not to brag, but I had an internship at the Ministry this summer. It was absolutely illuminating.” She let herself preen a moment before returning to feigning absolute interest in the person she was talking to. “Tell me about yourself. I’ll stop you if I’ve heard it before,” she urged. She’d stop them either way once she found out enough, but that wasn’t information that needed to be shared.
“ but did you really have an internship at the ministry? “ alecto cocked her head, genuine curiosity painting itself plainly over her features. for as much as she wanted to avoid thinking too hard about the current mess of timelines, she couldn’t help it. certain questions snagged on her mind. it was like alecto was filled to her rib-cage with a healthy desire for avoidance, but from there on up she hadn’t quite gotten the hang of avoiding. “ I won’t argue that you remember having the internship. but what if that was just the you in your head? if you walked into the ministry right now, they might not recognize your current body. or else, they might’ve, but those that you worked with recall a time where the ministry had no interns at all so they can’t remember you. “ she focused on dolly with the hint of a smile. “ fascinating, indeed. “
“Would it be entirely lame of me if I just left and went to bed early?’ Cordelia sighed. She came, she tried the whole party thing, and now she was ready for bed, She had run into her fellow Ravenclaw just as she was trying to make the final call of whether or not she could sneak away.
“ a little lame, sure, “ alecto conceded with a flippant wave of her hand. " but I think you’d find a few other people already hidden away if you decided to skip out, so no one could judge you too harshly. “ alecto let her hand drop with a small smile. “ I wouldn’t judge. there’s no need to heap a party on an already odd day. “
giving a little scoff, gilbert shook his head. “hey, i wouldn’t say ‘wiped the floor with’ by any means. we’re more than capable of holding our own against the likes of ravenclaw.” at least, that’s what he believed. “and how we all played in your timeline doesn’t matter now, anyway! just watch.”
“ well, no, I suppose it’d be hard to wipe the floor with someone whilst on a broom, “ she teased with a small laugh trailing after her words. then alecto took a small slip of her drink, and tilted her head at gilbert. “ but I will concede you’re right --- an upside to this is I suppose there’s a bit of a blank slate. you and I have never even played each other, not really. “
Emmeline, who had been struggling to find a place at the party where she felt comfortable, was now hovering near the refreshments table. She had yet to pick anything off of it, when she heard he name spoken. She looked up at the words, into the eyes of Alecto. “I expect i’m similar to the majority of people here.” Emmeline hadn’t been close with the girl in her timeline, then again she hadn’t been close to many, instead burying herself in distractions. “Confused is probably a good descriptor though. How were your holidays?” She spoke the way she had been speaking to everyone that day, carefully, not knowing exactly what was normal anymore.
“ similar to the majority isn’t always a bad thing, “ alecto flashed a sharp grin at emmeline; the sort of smile she had once practiced in front of her mirror, as a child, that told its recipient that she had a secret she was considering sharing. she had no secret just then, aside from the fact that two seconds later she broke off part of a pastry and popped it in her mouth. her smile faded. “ especially now, when I’d imagine anyone not confused beyond belief is doing something wrong. “ with a shrug, alecto thought that she’d gladly do something wrong if it meant she wasn’t confused. she popped another piece of pastry in her mouth and gave emmeline a closed-lip smile. “ but on the whole, my holidays were nice. boring, though perhaps that was just the quiet before the storm. and yours? “
when aeres first saw alecto, admittedly her first instinct was to run. her feet apparently didn’t get that message though, as she froze for a moment; just long enough that she couldn’t avoid the other. “alecto,” she greeted, an uneasy smile crossing her face. “how are you? this is all so crazy, isn’t it? it’s like everything is all spun around, no way to tell truth from lies.”
“ aeres, hi, “ alecto said, doing her best to match aeres’ smile. doing her best to outdo aeres’ smile --- she wasn’t quite sure what the other girl was feeling, but she didn’t seem like someone who wanted to smile at alecto. which was fine; alecto was tipsy, not in the mood to deal with unpleasantness or complications. she could keep conversation light. “ it is a little crazy. but I’m doing my best not to think about any of it. the party makes it easier. “ as if to show off her ease, she laughed and tapped the lip of her cup against aere’s shoulder.
it took a fair amount of alcohol for alecto to find herself tipsy; but if ever a party called for her most concerted effort, it was this one. she wasn’t in the mood to navigate careful conversations dancing around mention of the other times. when she spotted a head of hair that was hard to mistake for anyone but miss evans, she was glad; she couldn’t imagine her and the gryffindor having a need to compare notes. “ lily, hi. having a good time? “
alecto cut a sweeping gaze around her, expression neutral and placid, doing her absolute best to seem as if she frequently partied with people from other dimensions. when it landed on emmeline, a few steps away, she swept closer to the other girl; like she was the person alecto's wide glance was meant to find. “ emmeline, “ she drawled with words light as air. “ how are you? I’m afraid I didn’t get to see you on the train today. “
" so, “ alecto said, a halfway smile snaking across her features with her words. she curled her arm close to her body, bringing her half - full drink to rest close against her shoulder as she leaned towards gilbert. “ did ravenclaw’s quidditch absolutely wipe the floor with hufflepuff’s last they played in your timeline too? inquiring minds want to know. “ she paused, took a sip of her drink, and smiled brighter. “ well, my inquiring mind. “
Sirius raised a brow as the girl continued to talk. The alcohol was beginning to take effect so he found himself a bit lost with her words. “Well, considering that I came all the way over here, by myself, it’s pretty easy to assume that anyone following me over here _wants _something from me.” He took another swig from the bottle in his hand. “You’re right though, odds are, I would have told you to fuck off.”
He eyed the witch standing next to him, he recognized her, though it was hard to place her name, especially in the dark. With how jumbled up the world was now though, it was likely they had never met any ways, perhaps he’d just met a different version of the girl. “If you don’t want anything. Why’d you leave the party? Off to look for your own secluded spot to drink in peace?”
alecto rolled her eyes; the fact that the act would be lost on him in the dark like this didn’t much matter. in fact, if she were paid to, she didn’t think she’d be able to say whether or not she rolled them so spectacularly because he wouldn’t see it. “ you flatter yourself. I didn’t even know you were out here --- I separated myself from the party of my own volition. I wanted to be alone “ she cut a sharp smile in his direction, again, not caring if the expression would go unnoticed. “ I promise, you weren’t on my mind at all. “
but a handful of seconds later, despite her honest protestations that she’d come out here to be by herself, she sat down too. “ out of all the options, telling me to fuck off’s the best. I don’t know if I’d have respected your wishes, since I don’t quite like taking orders. but I wouldn’t have tried for conversation. “ she leaned back to rest on her elbows, head lolling to look at the sky. “ I just needed a break from the party. it doesn’t have the right feel, anymore. to somber to quite match up with the ones I remember. “
“ lots of flowing sleeves and short skirts, jewel toned dresses with loose collars. layers worn like armor, buttons running down her back and up her side. tall boots, all the easier to run in; long coats, all the easier to hide in. brooches and rings necklaces and earrings and hairpins glinting on a serious face. “
Sirius had made it to the outskirts of the party after nicking a bottle of Firewhisky from one of the tables. He kept walking, fast, making his way over to a spot on the shore of the black lake. Once there, he sat down up against a tree and opened the bottle, taking a large swig from it. He was angry. Angry at himself, and at pretty much everyone else, though he didn’t exactly know why. Maybe he was pissed about the whole situation? He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his jacket, both of which he’d found in his room at the Potter’s when he’d woken up there. He was about to light his smoke when he heard someone approaching. He groaned, annoyed at his isolation being interrupted. “
What do you want ?” he asked, not bothering to turn around and see who it was.
“ I always wonder the point of answering questions like that, “ alecto said. she extended an arm in a vague, flowing gesture, not looking at sirius as she did, or as she continued. it wasn’t the arm attached to the hand holding a bottle of her own, of course; even if she was picking apart his greeting, she didn’t want to splash sirius with alcohol. wasn’t worth the waste. “ if I did tell you what I wanted, would you actually give it to me? help me get it? would you even respond with a want of your own, or would you just tell me to fuck off? “ she shrugged and pulled her arm back close to her body, letting her hand dangle down as she finally glanced at the oldest black son. “ I don’t want anything, for the record. but it was still a silly question for you to ask. “
“ alecto has a soft spot for cassia, and she hopes that the same was true in the other timelines. they grew up together and grew even closer in ravenclaw, and alecto would fight tooth and nail against anyone who says a bad word against cassia. she doesn’t talk much about her emotions, but in alecto’s mind, they’re meant to stick together. “
“ the carrow estate was always too big a building for alecto to find it homey. wide windows and winding halls, old furniture she could never quite get comfortable on, the distant sound of a family member’s voice in a room she couldn’t place. she didn’t mind her own bedroom as much as the rest of it, but she couldn’t wait to move out and be on her own. “
there’s a little more info about what alecto’s other timelines are up to under the cut!
TIMELINE ONE : her actual timeline
the carrows, while sacred 28, were not always the most respected or refined. alecto decided to make it her mission to become refined. she learned to sit back and sit pretty and keep her mind on a leash until it was time to let the world know she was someone to be taken seriously. she tucked her sharp edges and sharp mind away, turned into something sweet, not bitter. she smiled her way through every expected social gathering, eagerly awaiting the walk home; she wanted to make connections but was wary of the things they might come to expect from her. she hated expectations.
after all, no one expected alecto to be sorted into ravenclaw. she loved being a ravenclaw almost as much as being a carrow. and she loved being a carrow because it was easy; because sometimes love was simpler than hate. she’s very aware at all times that one day, because she’s a carrow, she will be handed down a set of expectations to fulfill. she’s very aware at all times that she has dreams of running away from those expectations that can never come to pass. she decided to be her family name’s saving grace, and just because she’s grown up and decided she wanted to be her own person doesn’t mean she gets to.
TIMELINE TWO :
when she was eight, she decided she would be the best carrow there’d ever been --- that no one could ever look her in the eye and see her family’s messy history. they would be forced to contend with her if ever they declared a carrow wasn’t as good as a black, or a malfoy. it was nothing to become like them. it was easy; biting smiles and hidden thorns and the sweetest words ever spoken. a thousand heirloom jewels draped over her as she practiced a thousand heirloom hexes and curses. she got to hogwarts and got sorted into ravenclaw, and she smile, thought, where else could a mind like this fit?
it was one thing to rule the dueling club with an easy grace. it was another to be asked to set her mind to work for The Cause, to join up with the death eaters in practice if not in name. openly recruiting the little carrow girl would look silly, but no one could deny she had a mind for strategy. when her father wrote to tell alecto what was being asked of her, she knew his real message: you cannot say no. so she didn’t. she orchestrated things from the safety of the castle that could not be taken back; was commended when she went home for the things her mind had won. alecto was relieved when the war was over. it meant she was done. all her still-rough edges softened not by any attempts to become the perfect daughter, but by grief, remorse. it was easy to be like the other purebloods; but it was a thousand times harder to be alecto.
TIMELINE THREE :
there were far bigger problems looming on the horizon than what people thought about her family. but alecto liked control; she could not single-handedly stop a war, but she had faith that she alone could change the general perception of the carrows. it was simpler to focus on the parties and dinners and teas she’d have to attend to put herself in the public eye than to think of the things that might be asked of her otherwise. she had a fine hand for dueling and combat but it wouldn’t be what people knew her for; better to be seen as a vapid teenage girl, a model daughter, than to be seen as a weapon.
hogwarts as a whole and ravenclaw house especially were her sanctuaries; she knew that she could show show off her combat magic skills and overall competitive spirit. her peers would not look at those things as soldierly assets. nor would they look at her letting loose and having fun as a downfall --- a sign of the failings of carrows. awful things loomed, yes, but if alecto had her way she would not be asked to deal with them. the old guard wanted to fight a war, fine. but she would be staying out of it. if her family asked her, she knows she’d fall headfirst into war. she knows, too, that when they ask she’s liable to run away from the life she’s built. but if the world is kind, she will never have to face that choice.
have you been re-introduced to ALECTO CARROW? last we heard, the PUREBLOOD was most familiar with TIMELINE ONE. I don’t recall if they were always a RAVENCLAW, but I’ve heard the SEVENTH YEAR is still SHARP, POISED, LOYAL and CAUTIOUS, PROUD, DESIROUS, so that’s familiar. at least SHE remembers her way around the castle. ( zoey deutch; zoe, 20, cst )
alecto has a stats page on her blog and her bio from the main, as well as a pinterest board and playlist! but under the cut i have a ( not very ) little bullet point bio!! it gives the gist. anyway feel free to like or hmu bc i want to plot with everyone!!!
pride’s a nasty sin. alecto reminded herself of this every morning when she woke, and, after those blissful few moments between reality and dreams, reminded herself the mess her pride got her into. her family was never the sort to teach their children to be paragons of virtue --- but never did they teach them to let their sins run wild. carrows were precarious balancing acts, a little too wild and too reckless to ever be the golden children. but their blood was true and their convictions honest, so people forgave their transgressions; expected their transgressions, even.
it was a strange mantle to be born unto. be good, but not too good; be wild, but only as wild as your leash allows. it always chafed alecto, the sweet-faced pureblood daughter with a wandering mind.
she was always happy that more wasn’t asked of her --- that grumblings of politics she found unsavory were never thought to be of interest of her --- but wasn’t it a little insulting, too? she had such a sharp mind, after all, and doing nothing but dainty, husband-finding diversions made her feel like she was going insane. she was grateful that the old purebloods were too lazy to force change; she had a feeling any changes they wanted wouldn’t suit her sensibilities anyway. but in the meantime alecto knew very well she couldn’t force any changes of her own, either.
it wouldn’t do to cause a ruckus.
ravenclaw wasn’t quite a disappointment, but at eleven when she wrote home news of the sorting, she knew she’d lost any chance of being the favorite. a girl, darling little thing, with a whip-sharp mind --- that she made sure to only publicly use for chess and russian literature, but was a problem all the same. she would bring no heirs, and the thought of the mind on her made it harder for the family to pawn her off on some other bloodline’s idiot sons. she would never be the trophy girlfriend hanging off their arm.
her family was fine with it, really, and they left her alone so long as she feigned vapidity in all areas but her carefully plucked passions. she was a whiz with languages and dueling and history --- oh, but goodness, bigoted politics were such a boring thing. itty-bitty alecto felt faint at the very thought.
carrows were precarious balancing acts. alecto reminded herself of this, too. she hated the routine she lived ( being herself until she snagged watchful attention, and then pulling back into a placid-faced nobody of a girl ) but it was survival. because alecto had a secret: she couldn’t care less about blood purity and all the battles it begot. she had quite the mind for politics, in all honesty --- but her personal beliefs were at odds with the family’s inbred ideologies. they didn’t act on them, but they were toxic and present all the same.
the only reason she stuck around, kept quiet and still, was because the system benefited her. and family, well, that was everything, too. there wasn’t a disloyal bone in alecto’s body, so long as that loyalty was sworn to anyone but herself. she could never do it --- picking up to leave might satisfy her restless spirit, but her pride would curse her should she ever be so weak as to do what she wants.
after all, it seems the pureblood way to have a million desires burning quietly up your spine as you sat doing nothing. she couldn’t afford to cost her family’s pride by being selfish and causing a scene, a scandal. she was too smart to do something so stupid as gamble away her comfortable life for the sake of something as silly as her wants. her dreams. her beliefs.
but just because she didn’t turn her back on the world she’d been brought up in, alecto still hated the watchful eye of society and did her best to turn away any closeness, lest someone see too true a version of her --- she reveled in ravenclaw and preened under attention, but those were little wants. indulgences. she’d never allow herself anything more, and she’d never let someone see every part of her. it felt lonely, but it was sustainable. it was safe. letting anyone in or leaving anyone behind was too much.
the thing was that she’d always had a mind for strategy, a mind more battlefield than mind. and oh, alecto knew she could look so good, shrouded in warfare --- even if it was only the war her own rocket-quick departure would surely bring. but where would that leave the rest of her? where would it leave her every carefully constructed persona?
for years it was easier to stave off that line of questioning. to ignore that she didn’t fit into the world her name gave her birthright to, to ignore that she didn’t want to be a part of it at all.
alecto just had to strap her knives and wand to her thigh with pretty little garters, the better to flash the steel beneath silk skirts and lace robes. she learned to enjoy the refined burn of downing shots worth more galleons than some would ever see. she learned to love glittering adornments, and tossing her hair, and beguiling with a single flash of her pearly-white fangs. to turn a biting turn of phrase softened by gleaming eyes. she was good. except when she was bad. and loathe though she was to admit it, she could still find enough ancient carrow in her to be very, very bad when she so chose.
badness could very easily be written off as youth, except by those who shared alecto’s youth with her. then, well, it was her destructive carrow tendencies coming out to play. it was her forgetting which line in the sand she was supposed to pretend to care about. it was her doing very reckless things, perhaps unknowingly --- or perhaps awaiting the mess she’d leave in her wake. she’d have to fix the mess, of course, and in that fixing would lie the cool reminder that she looks like any of the rest of them, now, but she will always be a carrow. and carrows are too sharp, too much, and so alecto is, as well.
( the secret was she was too much alecto to be anything, really )
if she left all this behind, where could she possibly fit? who else would take her for all her sins and virtues, her lies and unwitting truths? as much as she is able to see through the facades of pureblood society --- and she is uniquely able to. has always known that they are all lucky the old guard is too comfortable and tired and dumb to act on their prejudices, has always known that beneath the glamour lies a grit. for all of that, alecto still feels ties to the only awful world she has ever fully known.
the nature of it, she knows logically, is that it gets its dark claws into the core of you. instills a love of family, a love of pride, that keeps you from leaving. even when most days you want nothing more than to separate from the pack and finally become yourself.
to her family, to those few that matter, alecto is too soft, and there’s the greatest irony. alecto resents her enjoyment of the things she made herself into, all those years and years ago --- the dresses and the parties and the champagne, and the flirting, laughing ease of life. she’s very good at playing her role, but when she needs the reminder of herself, she’ll proudly hint at challenging ideologies, flash her house colors, show her wicked words. but at home, well, that’s child’s play.
could she ever run from it all? sooner or later her family will turn her into a truer, crueller carrow. or maybe the rest of the wolves will take the ’ pretending ’ out of her facade. the independent charade has always been for her benefit only --- she’s loyal to a fault, and though either outcome would kill her, she’d succumb to one all the same.
with the revelation that there were other worlds like her own, but not, running congruent in time --- with the revelation that in one there was a war that brought her to this strange new existence --- alecto isn’t sure where she stands. the reality she now faces seems to be one where the adults she’s known all her life aren’t so lazy or useless anymore. a war is afoot, and with it come a whole host of new choices alecto has to navigate with the same sure-footedness she’s come to demand of herself. this could be her chance to break away from her family for good; to rebel in a final feeling way and become someone else entirely. or it could be time to see the consequences of her mind come calling.
she doesn’t know if the old alecto from this new reality worked behind the scenes for the apparent war efforts for a cause she abhors. she doesn’t know if that girl was already in the process of leaving. and alecto so hates not having all the information.
and she hates even more not knowing if having all the information would help or hinder her choices. for the moment, alecto has decided to continue on with life as she always had, even if this is most certainly no life she’s ever known before. who would she be if she didn’t roll with the punches, take pain and doubt in stride? she cannot afford to slip up now, when the possibilities are dizzyingly endless.
And girls need cold anger. They need the cold simmer, the ceaseless grudge, the talent to avoid forgiveness, the side stepping of compromise. They need to know when they say something that they will never back down, ever, ever.
Gregory Maguire, Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West (via liquidlightandrunningtrees)
