cheers to that

do you believe in life after love?

[alexyikes-blog]

loveisaach‌:

“That was almost a perfect impression” Isaac laughed, looking at Alex, “Maybe if you get bored of being a cop you could go a pursue a career in acting!”

“That was my major in college,” he laughed, picking up his shirt and shrugged. That seemed like years ago. “I probably forgot the lifting of my boobs but that’ll have to happen after I get a boob job.”

[alexyikes-blog]

persephonememes‌:

𝐌𝐀𝐌𝐌𝐀 𝐌𝐈𝐀! 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐖𝐄 𝐆𝐎 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐒 /  𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒.

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐨𝐫 𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠.

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄

❛ I’m getting more open-hearted ❜

❛ I was an impossible case ❜

❛ No one ever could reach me ❜

❛ What’s the name of the game? ❜

❛ Does it mean anything to you? ❜

❛ Can you feel it the way I do? ❜

❛ If I trust in you would you let me down? ❜

❛ Would you laugh at me if I said I care for you? ❜

𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐄, 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐘𝐎𝐔

❛ No more carefree laughter ❜

❛ Here is where the story ends, this is goodbye ❜

❛ There is nothing we can do ❜

❛ We just have to face it, this time we’re through ❜

❛ Breaking up is never easy, I know, but I have to go ❜

❛ Now there’s only emptiness, nothing to say ❜

❛ Knowing me, knowing you, it’s the best I can do… ❜

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐒

❛ Cause he always used to look at me that way ❜

❛ One look and you’re hypnotized ❜

❛ He’ll take your heart and you must pay the price ❜

❛ You’ll think you’re in paradise ❜

❛ Don’t look too deep into those angel eyes ❜

❛ Sometimes when I’m lonely I sit and think about him ❜

❛ And it hurts to remember all the good times ❜

❛ Every time when I see him, will it bring back all the pain? ❜

𝐌𝐀𝐌𝐌𝐀 𝐌𝐈𝐀

❛ I’ve been cheated by you since I don’t know when ❜

❛ Look at me now, will I ever learn? ❜

❛ There’s a fire within my soul ❜

❛ Just one look and I can hear a bell ring ❜

❛ One more look and I forget everything ❜

❛ Mamma mia, here I go again my my, how can I resist you? ❜

❛ Yes, I’ve been brokenhearted blue since the day we parted ❜

❛ My my, I could never let you go ❜

𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐄𝐍

❛ Night is young and the music’s high ❜

❛ With a bit of rock music, everything is fine ❜

❛ You are the dancing queen young and sweet ❜

❛ Feel the beat from the tambourine ❜

𝐈'𝐕𝐄 𝐁𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔

❛ I’ve been in love before ❜

❛ I’ve been waiting for you ❜

❛ And finally it seems my lonely days are through ❜

𝐅𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎

❛ I remember, long ago, another starry night like this ❜

❛ We were young and full of life and none of us prepared to die ❜

❛ There was something in the air that night ❜

❛ The stars were bright they were shining there for you and me ❜

❛ If I had to do the same again I would ❜

𝐌𝐘 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄, 𝐌𝐘 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄

❛ I can see it all so clearly ❜

❛ You are still my love and my life ❜

❛ Tell me is it really so hard to say? ❜

𝐒𝐔𝐏𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐏𝐄𝐑

❛ I was sick and tired of everything ❜

❛ Suddenly I feel all right ❜

❛ And it’s gonna be so different when I’m on the stage tonight ❜

❛ Smiling, having fun feeling like a number one ❜

❛ Still, I’m thinking about you only ❜

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐄

❛ And still on top of this I’m pretty sure it must have rained ❜

❛ I’m sure I had my dinner watching something on TV ❜

❛ I must have gone to bed around a quarter after ten ❜

❛ I must have read a while ❜

❛ It’s funny, but I had no sense of living without aim ❜

[alexyikes-blog]

loveisaach‌:

Isaac chuckled as he caught the towel and threw it back at Alex. “Put that day in the win column then” He began changing out of his uniform and into his more casual clothes. “I had a boring day, just patrolling the park, the only criminals I stopped were the ones littering” he scoffed.

"Let me guess,” he paused a moment before making his voice go up a few octaves. “But Mr Police Officer can’t you please just give me a warning this time?” And then went on to batt his eyelashes before shaking his head, laughing.

[alexyikes-blog]

captainxflint‌:

“Because I get free drinks. Why would I go home?”

“Who is your new employer? They sound like a hard ass. I hope the pay is at least good.”

[alexyikes-blog]

loveisaach‌:

“Hey kid, good shift?” Isaac asked as he walked into the locker room of the precinct and saw Alex, he had looked after the guy when he first transferred over and shown him the ropes, so he always liked to check in on him.

@alexyikes

Alex looked over his shoulder, who the hell was calling him kid? His stern facial expression softened seeing Isaac. He rolled his eyes and threw his towel at the older man. He truly didn’t know what he would have done without the elder’s wisdom coming in from a small town to this. “Well no one got shot or killed so yeah, although I pitty the homicide department. No overtime for them today. What about you?” 

[ofmurray]

closed || alex

[alexyikes-blog]

ryanyikes‌:

In this moment, it felt like everything that had happened since they had last seen each other no longer mattered, or even happened. It felt as though nothing had changed. But Ryan was no fool; he knew it was different. He could tell just by looking at Alex. He seemed happier, more content, more confident. Ryan thought he had definitely been working out – and by the looks of things squatting for days. One thing Ryan could say for definite, the uniform suited Alex. It was as though it was made, styled and tailored just for him. 

Ryan’s mind flashed back to the last time the two had been together. It was still the single most hardest thing he had to do. Although he tried to hold it together for Alex’s sake – he still cried about it every now and then. It was only a few nights ago since his last episode. Ryan was a mess his entire flight. He had lost his family, his sense of identity and his home. He’d convinced himself that this was what was for the best, him and Alex going their separate ways for them to start their new lives. Ryan believed that to keep Alex close to him would be selfish. To bring him to New York and his life; he felt as though he was toxic, and he would ruin Alex – and he would never be able to forgive himself if he did that; never. 

Ryan thought of their dog, the one they had together. A husky named Rocky. He knew that Alex needed him when they left. Ryan knew with everything going on with his parents deaths, he wouldn’t be able to take good care of him in the city, not like Alex could in Wyoming. Alex bloomed around animals and they all seemed to love him, everyone seemed to love Alex. When Ryan caught a glimpse of Alex’s eyes again, it wasn’t hard to understand why. One look into those deep blue eyes, and it would be impossible not to fall in love. 

Then there was the words. “I miss you.” which, although they sounded like three small words, Ryan could feel they were loaded, there was so much more behind them – it was just like Alex. He was man of few words, but he was such a complex and deep person. 

Ryan’s heart ached, he wanted to cling to Alex and never let him go. He didn’t know how to react, his body was in shock, his heart was beating faster than he could ever remember and his brain, oh his brain – it didn’t know what to make of any of it. Ryan was overwhelmed with emotions, mainly happy ones in this moment. He raised his thumb to wipe a single tear that was about to run down his cheek. He couldn’t cry, not here, not now. He was supposed to be happy – but surely these were tears of happiness.

Ryan had often wondered what would have happened if things were different, if they didn’t have to leave each other that day in Miami, if they could have just stayed at college. But it didn’t happen, there was no point wishing. There was so many questions he wanted to ask Alex, but nothing would come out – how do you fit every thought you’ve had about someone in years into one conversation. It wasn’t how it was supposed to be, this was not the plan. 

Ryan overheard the dispatch radio announcing that Alex had just finished his shift. He smiled slightly, an eyebrow raised automatically. “Looks like you’ve got some time on your hands now, how convenient, perhaps we could go for dinner, or a coffee? Whatever you want really?” He smiled, his hands fiddling with themselves. 

Ryan was never really a nervous person, but he was around Alex before – because of how much he loved and cared for him. But it was different now. Ryan was almost broken, cracked in places that could not be put back together – everything that happened to him since he last saw Alex had been chipping away at him, he’d lost parts of himself that he would never get back. But Alex had always been in his heart, locked away so tightly that no one would ever be able to take that away from him. ever.

Ryan felt as though he needed to apologise, but it wasn’t the right time. How could he turn around and tell Alex that he meant to call, he was meaning to stay in touch. The copious amounts of times that Ryan had put Alex’s number into his phone, that he still knew by heart, but couldn’t deal with the pain of having to hear his voice again without being able to touch him, kiss him, hold him. He couldn’t do it. That in mind, Ryan still sent two cards a year. One for his birthday, and for Christmas. Even to Alex’s family. The family he wished so desperately he was still a part of. But life doesn’t always go the way you want it to – and no amount of money can change that. 

Ryan couldn’t hold back anymore. He needed to say something, he had to. He would kick himself if he didn’t. “I just want to hug you, just to make sure you’re actually real?? That this is really you, that it’s not some caffeine induced daydream that I’ll fall apart over later. Please, can I hug you? It’s cool if you don’t want to.” the last part of his sentence made his voice break, his eyes were welling up at the thought of being so close to Alex and not being able to touch him, but the thought of it being because Alex didn’t want him to was almost too much for him to bare. He smiled through the tears, just using the palm of his hand to dry his eyes. He was fighting them all back. He didn’t want to start ugly sobbing and clinging onto Alex right now, especially in his cop uniform. 

Alex finally was able to look Ryan up and down. He was far more the part of a powerful millionaire than he was in college. Probably because in college he had more freedom, Alex thought, to dress. Now it was the big leagues and being carefree wasn’t an option anymore. And in realizing that Alex never had wanted so badly to go back to college.

He wondered how Rocky was going to react to seeing Ryan- if Ryan wanted to see Rocky. Alex hoped he did, even if it was more for his sake than Rocky’s, to spend more time with Ryan. And then he wondered how Ryan would react hearing that Rocky didn’t take the separation too well either. In the beginning when Alex sent Ryan pictures of him, he hadn’t disclosed that information. Because everyone involved was hurting and adding that information would just add more salt to the wound and Alex wasn’t an awful person. He just wanted to help people and it hurt him still that he couldn’t save or help Ryan. If anything he felt like he did the opposite with Ryan. He still didn’t understand how or why the other loved him when all he did was bring him down and not fit into his group.

Alex had hours of studying Ryan and seeing him distressed like this almost made him want to turn around and let this just be a beautiful nightmare but he stepped closer to Ryan, and touched him lightly on his arm. He was letting him know that he wasn’t the only one hurting, still hurting even after two years.

But there was so much to be asked and honestly he wasn’t ready with Ryan crying. It had to mean something, like Ryan moved on and seeing an old flame was just sad. Because Alex hadn’t made a name for himself. He was living in Brooklyn with a new roommate or because Alex was never going to be rich and Ryan was crying over the fact he had dated someone like him. And was thankful for the break up. That alone broke his own heart but he nodded, his own tear coming down his cheek. He did have time but not a lot of it.

“I uh- I need to let Rocky out though, first,” he managed to get out, and he wondered how that would pan out, speaking of their dog. Would they share Rocky? One week there and another week back at Alex’s? Alex didn’t know if he could stomach that, he and Rocky were close and they did almost everything together, really. And rolling skating without the husky wouldn’t be the same.

What came mostly to his mind with Ryan being so forward was that he truly had forgotten how intense Ryan was and never afraid to speak on what he thought or wanted. Alex himself was getting that way towards the end but it seemed once again Alex had now gone back semi into his shell. He thought he would always be a man of few words, he truly got that from his father and what he was trying to get at that Ryan made him a better person. “I want to be with you… like for coffee or something. Yeah.” Or you know just be with Ryan in general would be cool too.

In short of all of this, Alex truly felt like he was dreaming and he was going to wake up in another panic because Ryan wasn’t there to chase out all the ghost of Alex’s past. Or there to just touch. He missed that the most, just touching Ryan and grounding himself. Ryan had been his rock in everything through those last two years of their college experience. His world was turned upside down and not for the better when it came to say goodbye. And now Ryan was before him and he was once again far too afraid to open his mouth and just ask the things that needed to be asked. Or the things that still needed to be said, like I still want to fucking marry you. And I never got the fucking chance but I still have the fucking ring. Or the less aggressive please let’s give us another chance.

He blinked when Ryan asked to hug him and a glimmer of hope came through him. But he still wasn’t sure if he could without breaking himself again. He had been broken so many times in this life and he wasn’t sure if he could pick himself up again. Every time he lost himself a little more and more, and sometimes some pieces just didn’t fit like they did before. But against his better judgement or maybe it was just because it too was what he needed he nodded, and more tears broke from his eyes hearing Ryan’s voice crack. Maybe there was some hope for them. God he hoped there was and that Ryan wasn’t dating an underwear model.

It felt like slow motion as Alex opened up his arms and finally his cheek was against Ryan’s chest but it felt like no time had past at all. If anything it was like Alex had finally woken up from the nightmare of the past two years. And he let free all the pain of the past but it wasn’t an ugly sob, it was a quiet sob mostly to himself. He didn’t want Ryan to know how much he was crying because he still felt like the action was childish and they were kinda in public.

But too soon did Alex pull back, maybe he was the stronger of the two now. That didn’t stop him from reaching up to wipe away the tears staining Ryan’s cheeks. “Hey,” he whispered, reaching up to kiss his cheek softly. “I’m still not that great, Ry. I don’t deserve all the tears.” He was trying to lighten the mood and he hoped it was semi working, he still hated seeing Ryan in pain and over something so stupid like himself.

[hcathledger-deactivated20260210]

I don’t even try looking for something new Cause’ wherever I go I’ll be looking for you

Wherever I Go // OneRepublic

[alexyikes-blog]

reubxnlyons‌:

Reuben ascended the steps of the subway station, mobile plastered to his ear as he spoke to Alex. “Waiting five minutes is NOT the end of the world!” Okay, maybe he was over-exaggerating, Alex had definitely been waiting longer than that. Reuben couldn’t help it, he was never one for punctuality. Spotting the familiar figure in the distance, Reuben started towards him. He slid his phone in his pocket, and jabbed a finger in between Alex’s shoulder blades. “Well, if it isn’t NY’s finest.”

@alexyikes

Alex didn’t even remember the last time he rode the Subway. He somehow got two vehicles from the department and he still wondered if they looked at his driving record from high school or somehow thought since he was 25 he let go of all that childish things. He looked over his shoulder and smiled seeing Reuben. “Aw thank you sweetie,” he laughed before rolling his eyes at him. “Who were you yelling at? Did you mom call you again?”

[alexyikes-blog]

orion-boyd‌:

“Wait, did you chase… a haunted car? Is that what you’re trying to tell me?”

"Hey! My partner and me went to check it out and then it literally started moving and didn’t stop!” Alex laughed, shaking his head once more. “Guess you can’t trust anyone anymore. Still think that lady was in on it all.”

[ofmurray]

“ Cause baby you look happier, you do My friends told me one day I’ll feel it too And until then I’ll smile to hide the truth But I know I was happier with you

Sat on the corner of the room Everything’s reminding me of you Nursing an empty bottle and telling myself you’re happier Aren’t you?

Ain’t nobody hurt you like I hurt you But ain’t nobody need you like I do I know that there’s others that deserve you But my darling, I am still in love with you ”

@alexyikes

[sunshineloueeh]

[15/∞] endless Louis pictures

[alexyikes-blog]

@ryanyikes

One of us is crying One of us is lying In his lonely bed Staring at the ceiling Wishing he was somewhere else instead

[alexyikes-blog]

myshka--mira‌:

“I just don’t understand why they had to fuck with Rugrats..” Mira said, completely serious and devastated as she held up her phone, hardly able to even look at the screen. “I mean like, what was so wrong with it that now it has to look like this??” 

Alex’s jaw dropped as the girl showed him her phone’s screen. He shook his head and pushed the phone away. “Nope, I don’t want it,” he stated and shook his head. “That’s gross.”

[ofmurray]

closed || alex

[alexyikes-blog]

ryanyikes‌:

The conversation Ryan was having on the phone was dragging on far too long for his liking. He was getting bored with it. He dragged on the cigarette again, flicking the ash off the end and watching it fall to the floor. On the exhale his eyes rolled automatically – this call was dragging on too long. Nothing bored Ryan more than litigation lawyers who hadn’t seen the light of day in years and they jumped at the chance of social interaction. Ryan just kept agreeing with what they were saying.. It was really about time he got himself a Chief of Operations to deal with this kinda shit. 

It was only as he was thinking that he needed some kind of excitement is his life to free him of this hectic lifestyle when he felt it. One sharp slap. Right to his ass. It made him jump – he wasn’t thinking it would happen that quickly?!  He turned to look who had just offered the slap, ready to punch them in the fucking face. As, even though he wanted excitement, he wasn’t some sort of street walker that started handing out his assets for free.

As Ryan turned his face went white as a sheet. He was in shock. Part of him thought he was dreaming. That he was so bored that his greatest desire had just manifested before his eyes. He stood there; shellshocked. The ticket was placed between his face and his phone – which was quickly followed by Ryan uttering a hoarse “I’ll call you back” down the phone before chucking it into his pocket. 

As the cop who had given him the ticket turned to walk away – he knew he wasn’t dreaming. It was Alex. He was here. Oh, and that was definitely his ass. He couldn’t forget it in a million years. As he turned to walk away, Ryan knew that he couldn’t not say anything, he skipped a few steps and stood in front of Alex, placing his hands on his shoulders. “Al, shit. It’s actually you. What are you doing here– well, obviously you’re a cop now but– wow.. it’s really you.” 

The smile of Ryans’ face was genuine. He couldn’t remember the last time he smiled without realising it – but he would have put money on it being with Alex. “You look.. I mean you look-” Ryan’s eyebrows raised and he was fighting the urge to just kiss the man stood right in front of him. “You look amazing, I guess it’s true what they say. Good things get better with age.” 

There was so many words that Ryan wanted to say in that moment, so many questions, so many memories, but most of all – to tell Alex how much he missed him. How he had thought about him every night since they had last seen each other. How he still woke up hoping that nights without him were just a bad dream.

All he could muster was a simple “I’ve missed you.” But it’s true what they say, one picture speaks a thousand words. Ryan’s face was a picture right now. Full of longing and sadness, but also happiness and excitement about seeing Alex again. 

Ryan still couldn’t believe it. Right at that moment, his phone starting buzzing in his pocket, he only glimpsed at it to ignore the call. Nothing, and he meant Nothing was more important to him in this moment right now than the cop in front of him. 

“So – how did this happen, you being a cop? Oh – and thanks for the ticket.” he laughed it off. He held his hands together in front of him, they we eager to touch Alex. But surely Alex had moved on? Looking the way he did, being who he was – such a sweet sensitive guy. 

Alex’s only thing that came to his mind when walking away from Ryan was the memory of them at the airport in Miami saying their final goodbye. Somehow with Ryan being Ryan, Rocky has been allowed to stay with Alex on the flight back home to Wyoming. They had had an amazing graduation, they had been able to sit and walk the other graduate since they had been in different schools. Alex never had felt more proud of his boyfriend. And then came the hard realization it wasn’t going to work. Alex thought long distance would work but he couldn’t be selfish and it ended with a mutual decision and the airport was the last time he had seen Ryan or had even touched him and he hated he had been literally ugly sobbing into Ryan’s chest with a very confused Rocky looking at them. With him walking away it was like the airport all over again. That was a day Alex never wanted to relive.

He stopped short and then Ryan was in front of him and touching him. He hadn’t gotten a good look at him before he turned away other than he seemed more tired and stressed but looking into the mirror of his soul Alex didn’t see one day of age in them. They were still the same and lively and honestly Alex just wanted to run into his arms, he hadn’t felt alive since they broke up. Shit, Alex had told Ryan everyday in college they were going to get married. And then… it didn’t happen and that crushed him. And maybe the fact Rocky had cried too for Ryan when they were back in Wyoming.

And his second thought was of Rocky. What if Ryan wanted him back? He went to bite his lip at the thought, it was selfish but Rocky was the last thing he had of them and their past. And maybe the thought of shit I really need to let Rocky out.

He was about to open his mouth instead of just standing there like a fool when his radio went off, it was dispatch saying his shift was over and he was free to go home. He gulped but with his eyes still on Ryan he answered and then turned off his radio. He had dreamed of this day and what he would say. Begging Ryan to take them back, that he was still the only one for him and no one would ever compare to him. That he still wanted to marry him but nothing but a small and simple “I miss you too” came out of his mouth before he feared if he said more he would begin crying but neither him nor the police department needed that.

[alexyikes-blog]

captainxflint‌:

“The good news is I get free drinks at my new job. The bad news is I haven’t made it home in like… three nights. Oh well. Cheers!” He lifted his glass sloppily, knocking it against his neighbor’s with no grace.

“Uh.... why haven’t made it home in three days?”

[alexyikes-blog]

reicassidy‌:

@alexyikes

“Alex..?” Reina trailed off, approaching the only man in the coffee shop who fit the description. They agreed to meet and talk first before actually seeing his place in person, the girl never had a roommate before, even in college so she was wary. Hoping the old man behind him wouldn’t claim to be the one in the ad she had been talking to, “Reina?” She pointed to herself, before feeling herself mentally cringe as she realized she was talking like a caveman. 

Alex had just gotten off a 12 hours shift and if he had known he was going to be so exhausted he would have asked for a different time but here he was, looking at his coffee in a daze until he heard his name. He looked up and was about to offer his hand before the girl pointed at herself. He laughed and pointed to himself, nodding his head. “Alex.”

[alexyikes-blog]

orion-boyd‌:

“That’s true, honestly it would’ve been way funnier if she called the police to like, arrest the ghost she thought hurt her.” He laughed. “But nope, I had to deal with it.” 

"That’s actually has happened before,” Alex replied and shook his head as he laughed thinking of the early days of his career in New York. “Only it was a haunted car or something. Three hours of my life I’ll never get back.”