(The final) MR S UPDATE - Friday
I did it. I said goodbye to Mr S today. And I didn't even get a hug.
It's officially the last day I stay after class to see him.
He helped me do some research for Journalism Club and then I just had to tell him.
I told him "Also, I gotta let you know too, today's the last day I visit after school." or something along those lines, I don't even remember rn, and he said "Oh why?" and I said "Personal reasons." and I looked down and tried not to cry, and he looked at me and said "Oh... OH- Okay" when I made eye contact with him. He knew.
If he didn't know before, now he does. When he was making eye contact with me, it clicked as I felt myself looking at him with a heartbroken "I love you" kind of look.
He said "Well, it was nice seeing you." and something along the lines of "I enjoyed our time together." and he started to pack up to leave.
As he started to pack up and leave he changed the subject to Journalism Club and my Bestie before he went to leave. He was clearly trying not to hurt me more.
And then after that he went to actually leave, and as he was walking to the door and whatnot I thought about asking him for a hug but by the time I mustered up the courage, he was on his way out the door.
He said "Well, good luck on your exams and on your classes next semester" or something along those lines. (Everything is a blur, I was so nervous to tell him and I'm broken.) AND HE HAD THE NERVE TO SAY HIS SIGNATURE "See you later!" with a smile...
No. I won't F'ING see you later. He should've just said goodbye, now everything feels incomplete. And I didn't even get a hug from him before he left. And I'm never gonna visit him in his class again.
As soon as he left I burst into tears, and I tried to cry quietly because people were still walking through the hallway. I was only able to hold it in while he was there. The second he left, it hit me.
I wrote a little note on a mini sticky note and left it on his desk. It read "For Mr S (Actual name tho) I'm gonna miss you sir. Thank you for everything. - A" I hope he cries.
My life is gonna be so different without him.