"When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth." - some guy once
In this paper we will be reviewing possible candidates, presenting the evidence as well as the anti-evidence, in order to reach an extremely flimsy conclusion which I already have decided by the time I'm writing this introduction. Without further ado, let's get right into it gaymers:
Printer Fail is a Kirby character introduced in 2010 in the hit videogame "Kirby's Epic Yarn", that does not matter. What matters is that he's introduced as a "yarn boy prince" which leads to the question of where are that kid's parents, and how did he get to be royalty. That also doesn't matter too much, but as a preface I must say that several of his characteristics will be taken into account and compared to other character's in this post. The characteristics to evaluate are: SHAPE and MATERIAL (yarn), EYES, EYEBROWS, NOBILITY TITLE and COLOR (blue allegedly).
I will be ranking the candidates based on those factors.
I. YIN-YARN & KINE:
Definitely the same material (yarn), and originate from the same plane of existence (possibily). However their relationship seems to be that of enemies. Although the Kirby franchise isn't a stranger to bas parental figures (ex, Max Haltmann and Hyness), it would be kinda fucked up for Pointing Fingers to kill his own dad I think.
Due to famous relationship with Yin-Yarn and blue coloration, Kine is a natural candidate to consider. Punch Flies' ability to become a submarine/underwater creature at will is somewhat reminiscent of Kine's visage, however, at the end of the day, he is a fish.
This combined does not explain his orbness. I rate it a 7/10
II. A KNIGHT AND KING DEDEDE:
Blue, ROYALTY, and that's about it. Their colors are very similar but it also just could be that Hal thinks of blue as a royalty color. Much more likely when paired with an orb, seeing as DDD is a penguin. I think it would be more likely if Fluff grew feathered wings
Any orb knight (Meta, Dark Meta, Galacta, Morpho) falls into this category too, as they are all Round. Meta has extra points as he's blue sorta and is the one that seems to know DDD.
Does explain the round, blue, title and eyes (kinda) but eyebrows and material remain a mystery. How do u yarn-ify a child. i rate this a B plus
III. A SNOWMAN, MARX AND MAGOLOR:
Yeah this covers the eyes, eyebrows and shape sorta however where the hell did the blue come from (seeing as its snow, purple and brown) as well as why don't Pfortine Fail's eyes glow or hands float or why he's a prince. I don't think any child Magolor has should have a crown ever, sounds like a family curse or smth. Also would mean First could make Marx's fucked up face and Im not sure how i feel about that. 3 stars
Could even be stretched to explain the yarn as Yhillies are real.
IV. FRANCISCA MADE A FUCKED UP YARN PROJECT:
Do I need to say more? I don't. This is rated 3.17 + 6.3.
V. HYNESS:
Well they're both blue. 0/10 never speak of this.
VI. MR DOOTER:
They're both blue (vaguely), and genies are real in Patch Land. Does not explain the orbness.
VII. LOLOLO
Blue, big eyes, both have L in the name.
VIII. AN AZUMARILL:
Blue, round, sounds about right.
IX. I FORGOT HOW TO COUNT WITH ROMAN NUMERALS AND I DONT WANT TO LOOK IT UP - DARK MATTER:
If you think about it it makes no sense but they can kinda shapeshift so I'm putting it in the list.
X. A BRONTO BURT:
Really similar face ngl.
IN CONCLUSION: We just don't know. Feel free to add or discuss this document.
King Dedede: Sure is a shame that I can’t control the elements to reflect my current emotional state. Not that I need to be any more cool, sexy, and powerful than I already am but nonetheless I think I deserve it.
Meta Knight: Sure is a shame that I can’t control the elements. I deserve it.
Bandana Dee: Sure is a shame that I can’t control my emotional state.
Susie: Shame. I deserve it.
Magolor: I need to be more cool, sexy and powerful. I already am, but nonetheless I deserve it.
Taranza: Sure is a shame I’m so emotional, I need to be cooler.
Galacta Knight: Sure is a shame that I can’t be any more cool, sexy, and powerful than I already am but nonetheless I think I deserve it.
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