No way to put this in a way that doesn’t make me sound like a jerk, but it’s really tiring when people repay your politeness and willingness to hear them or help them by objectifying you into this emotional crutch that is almost expected to care for them, baby them and be readily available to them. Then, when you are doing your own thing with other friends, then come the passive aggressive posts and the “I’m bored : /” and those god damned “*peeks in*” because not only is an emotional crutch expected to ALWAYS be there, but also to fucking read minds or something and always take the initiative.
I care a lot about people but it grows increasingly difficult to do so when people start giving you reasons to not want to grow closer to them. and also giving you these mixed signals or making ambiguous posts or what have you, any of those indirect “hmph”s whenever you, gasp, are doing your own thing and having fun with your friends that actually treat you like people instead of a crutch. I may not call you on your shit whenever I see this or it’s done to me, but you sure as hell can count on me noticing it and keeping my distance from you in purpose because that is not the people I want in my life.
Don’t mistake kindness for submission or for a ticket to own a person, because that is exactly how you drive people away, which probably only leads you to make more passive aggressive shitty posts, anyway.
And for that matter, be fucking respectful of people and their willingness to open up. The moment you start being vague about “auhhh friends have friends and that sucks why can’t I be part of the jokes or the fun” is the moment I lose respect for you. I’ve tried to stay nice and patient about this, but I will get close to whoever I want to get close, and fuck off if you feel entitled to it somehow, no one is entitled to other people, because that is not how friends work.
It just vexes me that you show some kindness and basic politeness to some people and, bam, it’s instantly assumed you have to attend to their every whim and then they get annoyed when you aren’t 100% ‘theirs’, and then they start doing this shitty “well I guess I will go now”, the typical vague “I’m bored” in the middle of other people having fun and other such things that aren’t subtle at all.
If I, or anyone, is keeping their distance or not growing closer with you at the Mach 5 speeds you want or not including you into fucking everything they do, either by themselves or with their friends, well, tough fucking luck, be respectful of their decision, try not to be a massive and vague imbecile just because someone didn’t become your BFF in two days flat.
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