A L O K E

she/her | vent acc

[alokes-vents]

★彡[ᴡᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴀʟᴏᴋᴇ'ꜱ ᴠᴇɴᴛ ʙʟᴏɢ]彡★

I guess you can see it as a little story. . .

want the main blog instead? go here: @looniesandproud

𝙽𝚊𝚖𝚎: Aloke 𝙿𝚛𝚘𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚜: she/her 𝙾𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚌𝚒𝚊𝚕𝚜: miss_scissors (Ao3) 𝚂𝚎𝚡𝚞𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚢➳ straight, grayasexual

❝ 𝓘𝓽 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀𝓼 𝔂𝓸𝓾'𝓻𝓮 𝓪 𝓯𝓵𝓸𝔀𝓮𝓻. . . ❞ ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ

need vents in order? vent masterlist

[alokes-vents]

Vent #4

I am so done with my ex. It's been 3 days now since we broke up. Yes, I did change my email. I told him on my old one that I changed it and I'm not giving him my new one. He says that he wants to be there for me. So, I said "I have my bestie." And he does his stupid "I'm sorry :[" shit. I'M NOT EASY TO GUILT TRIP!!!! I told him he needs to stop saying sorry and asked why he did it. "Because I want to seem more likeable, I don't want people to hate me" he says. LET PEOPLE NOT LIKE YOU!!! I told him "A lot of people hate me, and you don't see me complaining!" He tried to throw in the "I'm not trying to complain!" I gave him a RANT on why it doesn't matter if people don't like you. I told him bye and that was it.

That was all last night. THIS MORNING - my dad peed on one of our cats cause "The cat sprayed" BITCH THAT WAS A FEW DAYS AGO!!! So after that he pissed on the cat and I was having a moment and let the cat outside (We let all of our cats go outside and come inside) AND HE YELLED AT ME FOR IT! I told him I wasn't thinking and he walked away yelling at me saying "Maybe you should slow down!" and "Slow down on that drivers test and maybe you will pass it!" WHICH THAT HURT! I take 15-30 minutes on that test (I took it 3 times already) And he's yelling because "It's common sense" and he took it on his first try. LIKE EXCUSE ME I'M SORRY?!?!? DO YOU WANT ME TO SIT THERE FOR ONE HOUR TAKING 18 QUESTIONS?! Oh and dad NEVER gave the cat a bath.

[alokes-vents]

- UPDATE -

For the ones who read my other 3 vents then you know (If you didn't, long story short - boyfriend troubles, I broke up with him. . . he kept messaging me at school since I have cyber school and at my email.)

I made an email I used for school (which was a personal email) and I put it on my laptop here. He doesn't know this email which is good. I'm still keeping the other one since I have my Pinterest and my main Tumblr on that one (and some other stuff).

Now I do have ONE bestie, and I talked to her. And she is proud of me.

Alright that's the update :)

[alokes-vents]

#Vent 3

Alright honestly this is the most I vented in the past 3 days. I didn't think I would be using this account this much ;>;

I did break up with my boyfriend. And I felt SO MUCH BETTER since I did. Well. . . ALMOST. Why you ask?

At first I thought that he would just message me at school, because you can't get away from that (if non y'all remember I go to cyber school) but like he MESSAGED ME after school. (I didn't give him my number, just my email.) And I want to make a new email but it won't let me ;>;.

Now I don't want to be too harsh and be like "Look you can't message me on my Email anymore blah blah" Cause I know what he would do. HE'S GONNA MESSAGE ME.

Now I'm going to be honest, I am kinda annoyed about it honestly. Like I get at school cause its online and I can't get away from it BUT COME ONNN I GOT BETTER THINGS TO DO!!!!

Alright thats it

Love you my little angels and little demons

[alokes-vents]

VENTS MASTERLIST

missed the story? here it is in order:

into post #1 #2 #3 update #1 #4

[alokes-vents]

Vent #2

I got him (my boyfriend) to talk about his family a bit, but he wouldn't say much. Hey, at least I got something. . . Right? Yeah well, I still feel like I should leave him.

I had made new plans for my life and feel happier this way with my more recent plans I made. . . but it isn't with him. I wish I made the right choice and didn't get with him, cause now I have to deal with breaking up with him.

No, it won't hurt me to do this. . . I just will feel bad that the pain it will give him. That's why I feel like I have to let it play out before I make any decisions to leave him. Hell, I still got two more years of high school, anything could happen between us!

That leads me to today. We both talked about how I will go to the school counselor and talk about what colleges I will go too. Now he KNOWS I want to go to a college in Boston (Massachusetts), and yet he says "Missouri? or was it Minnesota".

LIKE I TOLD YOU SO MANY TIMES THE PLACE I WANTED TO GO!!! I ended up telling him somewhere on the east coast.

So, I decided to change where I wanted to go to college. I might stay in my home state or even go to Maryland. But I won't give him straight answers of where I'm going now. I just don't trust him now.

Now if I do leave him (hopefully(?)) I will go to South Korea. Yeah. . . BIG jump I know. . . but I'm kinda getting vibes of him trying to follow me everywhere until I come back. . . and I know he wouldn't expect me to go there. (He knows Canada. So, I have to scratch that off my list.)

Of course I will travel Europe INTO South Korea. I am secretly learning Korean now. Even though in school I'm taking French, I'm secretly learning Korean without no-one knowing.

I feel VERY bad for doing this and keeping it from everyone, but I feel like it will be easier this way for everyone I know.

Love you my little angels and demons

[alokes-vents]

Vent #1

Alright so yes, I have a boyfriend, and it started out great! I told myself that unlike last time I will have it last more than a month. . . Then I was watching YouTube and saw a video about how when a girl gets a male friend, he automatically wants to date her.

Now me and my boyfriend go to high school together and in the same grade. Even though it's cyber school be both showed ourselves to each other and spoke.

Now, we already planned that after school I would go to college to Massachusetts (That's not where I live, but it will be out of state for me). Then I will move to Canada with him where we will settle down.

BUT. . . after watching that video I realized that what if he doesn't have feelings for me. . . DO I even have feelings for him?!?! I don't want to break his heart and say "I don't have feelings for you, it is over."

"Why" you ask? Well, he is very. . . clingy. Like if I don't message him within a few hours he will say "I miss u 🥲" and at first, I was like "aww he cares". But now I'm kinda like "Oh fuck"

Now I was open with him a bit, but I didn't give him my life story, which he did the same with me.

Now I did the first thing most people would do. Ask about the family, see what happens. All I got was "My brother is weird" and "Parents are kinda strict." When I asked for further information he basically said "I don't want to sound like I'm venting."

I kinda took this as a MINOR red flag. Like he didn't not just avoid the topic of his family, he did say some stuff. It was just how clingy he is.

I mean I don't mind for some clinginess. . . It's just with him it's too much. He is emotional so I can't say anything mean, but it is okay, cause I got an alternative plan if I have to escape him.

Now I might seem paranoid with all of this. . . But like I am talking to him about what happens when I am paranoid. . . but not how I feel right now.

I'll update soon my little angels and demons :)