YOUKOSO WAGA TAINAI TUMBLR E!
Blog of the amateur writer alter yi. Feel free to ask questions or chat or something THINGS TO WRTE:
--Gintama (kinda) God AU
--Ao no Exorcist Ghost AU
--Miraculous Ladybug Dream AU
--Gintama + Natsume Yuujincho Xover
--YGO Fantasy School AU
--KHR Decimo Xanxus AU
--Naruto Ramen Chef AU
--Reincarnated as Harry Potter AU
--KHR Demon King AU
--KHR Cursed Tsuna AU
--xxxHolic + Natsume Yuujincho Xover
--KHR + Assassination Classroom Xover
--Harry Potter + Rise of the Guardians AU
--Harry Potter Married!Snape AU
--Gintama smol!Gin AU
--Yet another KHR twin AU
--KHR Witch AU
--Naruto Reincarnated!Gaara AU
--Ao no Exorcist Satan'sSon!Yukio AU
--Persona 3 Switching Places AU
--KagePro Storybook AU
talk to me in twenty years when i get over my existential crisis of: am i a writer? am i not a writer? do i still enjoy writing? is it a chore? am i deluding myself when i say i like writing? is it procrastination or is it giving up when i say i’m waiting for the inspiration to spark?
do you ever get that feeling where you want to write something, there’s that itch in your brain, but you don’t know what to write? like, you just want to open a blank word doc--not a wip, not anything--and just word vomit all over it, but the words aren’t coming even though the itch is there. you don’t even have an idea, a clever opening to a scene or a random line of dialogue. you just want to write, but now you’re just pouring into a tumblr post about how you can’t write anything even though you want to write, even though you’re clearly putting the brain power into writing here.
there’s an au i’ve had for a while, opened it up, thought about it, and then thought...shit, this is gonna be less about naruto growing up with a good parent figure and more about said parent figure slowly trying to change the academy curriculum to include things like: actual ninjutsu. tree climbing. water climbing. first aid. medical ninjutsu.
i now spent more time than i’d like pondering the wonder that is konoha’s ninja academy curriculum. you’re teaching ninjas, but you’re not teaching them ninjutsu? you’re not teaching them how to figure out their elemental affinities? you’re not teaching them the most used tree climbing or water climbing? you’re not even teaching them first aid?
and you’re expecting these kids to not die out in the field? konoha? excuse me? i know you’re not in war, but it’s still dangerous. if you’re uncomfortable with raising child assassins, then at least raise child medics. teach them to do some good with their chakra
so, after updating my KHR marriage fic (Holy Macaroni--Er, Matrimony) and looking at the doc manager, i found that the KnY fic i was agonizing and complaining about editing was still there. and that idea has morphed into a different AU, so that first chapter is never getting a second chapter. which is a shame because i worked hard on that and editing it (actually, i think that was the mostly non-edited version).
also hi, i’m not dead despite the long absence
anyway, i said most things that i’m not going to be able to write, but i forget the most important part. the part where muzan gives tanjirou his blood and then laughs at the idea of the boy eating his family. because muzan hates those earrings, hates who they remind him off, and he wants this child to suffer.
but tanjirou is nezuko’s brother. the one demon who refused to eat out of pure stubbornness. except nezuko had tanjirou with her. tanjirou has no one to stop him, and while he avoids his family, he still eats someone. and then another. and another. once you taste human meat, that’s it. you’re a demon. you start craving it, your human reason erodes away, you can’t stop.
tanjirou is the demon higan for more than a year before his stubbornness finally kicks in, and he’s disgusted with himself. he’s so disgusted that he lets a man sneak up behind him and cave his skull in with an axe (an axe, the irony. he used an axe once). he plays dead long enough for them (his food, no not food) to run away (come back) before he sits up. that wouldn’t be enough to kill him. sunlight. a demon slayer’s sword.
dawn is still too far, so he searches for the nearest demon slayer. he finds a group in the next town over, battling a pair of demons, formerly a mother and her daughter. he saves a demon slayer from losing an arm to the daughter. they mistake him for a regular person for a moment, telling him to run away, until they see the daughter claws break against his arm. his blood demon arts turn his skin black, and the slayer screams, emanating fear.
just an hour ago, the scent of fear was tantalizing to him, promising a delightful meal. now, he hates it. another slayer goes for his neck, but his blood demon art is still active, and it barely makes a scratch. he’d undo it, but he has to defend from the daughter, who’s screeching at him for stealing her prey, she found them first, she’s the one who’ll eat them, not some midget appearing late.
and higan may have a human mind again, but he’s been a demon for a year. there’s some things he does from muscle memory. he’s used to food disputes. when demons keep demanding to give them his prey, he headbutts them. to be more specific, he pulls them down to eye level and headbutts them in the mouth to break their teeth. the daughter screams, more in indignation than in pain, and attempts to claw out his eyes, the demon slayers the furthest thing from her mind right now.
he sees the mother die from the corner of his eyes, and the daughter does not notice, her back to her mother, her fury drowning out her dying cries. The daughter roars, catching the pity in his eyes. Some words don’t come out right as she spits curses at him, clawing uselessly at his neck, never noticing as a sword cuts through her neck. She’s still cursing in her last moments.
How pitiful.
He lets his skin return to normal. The demon slayers back away, as if expecting an attack.
“What’s wrong? Just do it like you did before.” He smiles as he points at his neck.
haven’t had anything productive in a while so i just posted the snapshots chapter written weeks ago even though i didn’t want two chrome-centric chapters so close together
it’s me, the person who’s decided to post the unedited version with new scenes from the edited version, but now i’m editing that version. fuck neverending editing hell
that moment when you realize that one of your favorite parts of writing immortal characters is writing body horror. or writing their avoidance to even remember a fatal wound. or you know, some characters freaking out about a crippling injury and them looking at it like, oh i knew there was something wrong
you can have an immortal who’s very nonchalant about these things or one who will never get used to seeing his own blood or one who hates these kinds of things because they’re trying to be a normal person, dammit
so i said a week and now it’s been more than two weeks thanks to the horror that is editing and being dissatisfied with your work that you suddenly want to rewrite this scene and then tweak this scene to fit that and then oh no look at that mess of words that i hate. how to deal with this?
i might just delete all the revisions and post the unedited version. screw everything.
btw, have i mentioned that the snapshots of life timeline isn’t being updated? it’ll be updated when i find the motivation to type everything into a google sheet. also when i go try and make sense of the all the events i’ve written, assign arbitrary ages to the ones that don’t have ages, and decide if i want to put in the alternate timelines and how.
watching kimetsu no yaiba inspired me and i have spent a week working on chapter one of long fic: the mistake - part two. part one was the oc insert of gintama aka dawn of a new life aka the fic that hasn’t updated in more than a year because i want a katsua pov but can’t write a katsura pov screw you zura
all long fics are mistakes for me. especially canon rewrites. stop coming up with canon rewrites you dumb brain.
yay for snapshots updating. i feel like i should’ve specified this in my author’s note, but the video game’s completely fictional because it’s like twenty years in the future.
also, i dropped so much hints in that chapter about iemochi’s past. like, three. none of you are probably going to know which three hints because i’m probably only going to write it when i write a next gen fic centering around him and akira, and that’ll come out...never
how do you even come up with a next gen fic? i’ve seen people basically copying canon with a few twists and... guys? guys. i don’t think tsuna’s capable of hiding anything from his future kids. also don’t think tsuna’s going to pull an iemitsu. and if you think just because someone’s a guardian’s kid, then they’ll automatically be the next guardians, no. stop. hayato’s son is sick of hayato gushing over tsuna that he plans to join the police just to spite him. traditional teenage rebellion, go.
then again, i haven’t read next gen fics in a while, so maybe there’s a good one out there?
btw, there’s a chapter already written but i don’t want to post that because pacing reasons. as if pacing exists in this fic
that moment when you start to realize just because persona 3 - 5 were set in a high school setting, you don’t have to make your persona fic be like that. i still both want to / don’t want to write this thing. too long, too much commitment, slowly dropping motivation, slowly losing love
doesn’t stop my brain from thinking about it and my gay son william and gay trash daughter [insert name here]
aka i’ve given up on adhering to a monthly posting habit, so now you guys, by which i mean what little people read these and myself, get sporadic, random updates. if i don’t mention anything, assume it’s on ice / hasn’t gotten an update / maybe dropped.
welcome to the one year anniversary of dawn of a new life’s last chapter, get ready for a second anniversary
meanwhile, snapshots has just updated. what a shock
holy matrimony’s just going to stay a oneshot for now. probably a good thing because few pairings are as good as Ryohei x Hana or whatever number that is. 3387, maybe? *shrugs*
wip of the month:
the ao no exorcist wip that i sometimes mention but refuse to give details. well guess what. yukio’s the one who inherited satan’s power because rin’s dead. and a ghost. there, i said it. rin gets ostracized because no one can see him, yukio gets ostracized because he’s got a reputation of being haunted (good going, rin). also because he’s smart as hell and sticks his nose in all the books.
good news: shirou lives. bad news: shirou teaches at cram school, rin enrolls as a student (and surprisingly does a good job when he remembers to walk like a normal person), and yukio can’t handle his overbearing family (from both sides of his parents)
also: rin’s a ghost. ghosts are, supposedly, demons that possess emissions from a corpse. so like, do they possess a soul? or do they possess these not-soul things, meaning that ghost rin isn’t even real rin, just a copy.
i give you the one thing that will send rin in a depressed mood when he thinks about it.
pixelskylines
amandla
jacobvanloon
origamiaround