#yi chat

[alteryi]

y’know, i might just do that one project i’ve been thinking of, which is firing up an etrian odyssey game and writing about that

[alteryi]

talk to me in twenty years when i get over my existential crisis of: am i a writer? am i not a writer? do i still enjoy writing? is it a chore? am i deluding myself when i say i like writing? is it procrastination or is it giving up when i say i’m waiting for the inspiration to spark? 

[alteryi]

do you ever get that feeling where you want to write something, there’s that itch in your brain, but you don’t know what to write? like, you just want to open a blank word doc--not a wip, not anything--and just word vomit all over it, but the words aren’t coming even though the itch is there. you don’t even have an idea, a clever opening to a scene or a random line of dialogue. you just want to write, but now you’re just pouring into a tumblr post about how you can’t write anything even though you want to write, even though you’re clearly putting the brain power into writing here.

writers are weird. i’m weird. brains are weird

[alteryi]

soooo

there’s an au i’ve had for a while, opened it up, thought about it, and then thought...shit, this is gonna be less about naruto growing up with a good parent figure and more about said parent figure slowly trying to change the academy curriculum to include things like: actual ninjutsu. tree climbing. water climbing. first aid. medical ninjutsu. 

i now spent more time than i’d like pondering the wonder that is konoha’s ninja academy curriculum. you’re teaching ninjas, but you’re not teaching them ninjutsu? you’re not teaching them how to figure out their elemental affinities? you’re not teaching them the most used tree climbing or water climbing? you’re not even teaching them first aid?

and you’re expecting these kids to not die out in the field? konoha? excuse me? i know you’re not in war, but it’s still dangerous. if you’re uncomfortable with raising child assassins, then at least raise child medics. teach them to do some good with their chakra

[alteryi]

so, after updating my KHR marriage fic (Holy Macaroni--Er, Matrimony) and looking at the doc manager, i found that the KnY fic i was agonizing and complaining about editing was still there. and that idea has morphed into a different AU, so that first chapter is never getting a second chapter. which is a shame because i worked hard on that and editing it (actually, i think that was the mostly non-edited version). 

also hi, i’m not dead despite the long absence

anyway, i said most things that i’m not going to be able to write, but i forget the most important part. the part where muzan gives tanjirou his blood and then laughs at the idea of the boy eating his family. because muzan hates those earrings, hates who they remind him off, and he wants this child to suffer.

but tanjirou is nezuko’s brother. the one demon who refused to eat out of pure stubbornness. except nezuko had tanjirou with her. tanjirou has no one to stop him, and while he avoids his family, he still eats someone. and then another. and another. once you taste human meat, that’s it. you’re a demon. you start craving it, your human reason erodes away, you can’t stop.

tanjirou is the demon higan for more than a year before his stubbornness finally kicks in, and he’s disgusted with himself. he’s so disgusted that he lets a man sneak up behind him and cave his skull in with an axe (an axe, the irony. he used an axe once). he plays dead long enough for them (his food, no not food) to run away (come back) before he sits up. that wouldn’t be enough to kill him. sunlight. a demon slayer’s sword.

dawn is still too far, so he searches for the nearest demon slayer. he finds a group in the next town over, battling a pair of demons, formerly a mother and her daughter. he saves a demon slayer from losing an arm to the daughter. they mistake him for a regular person for a moment, telling him to run away, until they see the daughter claws break against his arm. his blood demon arts turn his skin black, and the slayer screams, emanating fear.

just an hour ago, the scent of fear was tantalizing to him, promising a delightful meal. now, he hates it. another slayer goes for his neck, but his blood demon art is still active, and it barely makes a scratch. he’d undo it, but he has to defend from the daughter, who’s screeching at him for stealing her prey, she found them first, she’s the one who’ll eat them, not some midget appearing late.

and higan may have a human mind again, but he’s been a demon for a year. there’s some things he does from muscle memory. he’s used to food disputes. when demons keep demanding to give them his prey, he headbutts them. to be more specific, he pulls them down to eye level and headbutts them in the mouth to break their teeth. the daughter screams, more in indignation than in pain, and attempts to claw out his eyes, the demon slayers the furthest thing from her mind right now.

he sees the mother die from the corner of his eyes, and the daughter does not notice, her back to her mother, her fury drowning out her dying cries. The daughter roars, catching the pity in his eyes. Some words don’t come out right as she spits curses at him, clawing uselessly at his neck, never noticing as a sword cuts through her neck. She’s still cursing in her last moments. 

How pitiful.

He lets his skin return to normal. The demon slayers back away, as if expecting an attack. 

“What’s wrong? Just do it like you did before.” He smiles as he points at his neck. 

[alteryi]

in which after taking some time to actually think about my KnY fic... i just decide to screw everything and start the chapter from scratch

on the plus side, i now have an idea for how the natagumo mountain arc will work out

[alteryi]

haven’t had anything productive in a while so i just posted the snapshots chapter written weeks ago even though i didn’t want two chrome-centric chapters so close together

[alteryi]

it’s me, the person who’s decided to post the unedited version with new scenes from the edited version, but now i’m editing that version. fuck neverending editing hell