Like I ever really had it. âAre you joking?!â I know her well enough that she is way too good for someone like you. âYeah, yeah, shocking piece of information there, Benj.â He simply couldnât be quiet, continuing to add retort after retort for every one of her statements. âCan you stop acting like I kept it a secret or something? You know Iâm not as bad as how they make me out to be, donât you, Benj? I ainât âbout that secret life. Like it would have made a difference to you, anyway! Bares know about Sienna, and the gal from India. The only reason why Sienna doesnât know about the other one is because then mum would kill me. I know you know about her and dad trying to par each other off all the fucking time, because apparently she tells you everything these days, init? But if they had just gotten over some clapped shit that happened years ago, then none of this would be happening.âÂ
Before he knew it, he was unloading all the âdeepâ stuff, which heâd always try and brush off with a shallow joke. âI love them, but they keep dragging it on and longing everyoneâs lives out, itâs so fucking clapped. Even if I hadnât fucked up, at the end of it all, Iâd be screwing one of them over, or both, or none! Maybe Iâd marry both, I donât know what they fucking planned. But if I did end up getting married, I was gonna try so hard to be a sick husband, Benj. Thatâs no way near gas. Even if the gal in India didnât end up being as razz as me, I would have made her feel like the razziest, and all of that other good husband tings. It was just dead from the get go, so I wasnât gonna sit around being a wasteman, stopping myself from chirpsing someone I actually like, just because theyâre beefing each other with their bait games, was I?â For some reason, Kiran went from trying to blame everything on Benji to wanting to explain himself, and the word vomit kept flowing out. âAnd thatâs all this is, stupid fucking games I never wanted to be involved in. Now itâs just fucking peak because Siennaâs proper upset, and Iâm thinking about deep shit I never wanted to think about.â Luckily for Kiran, Benjiâs following statements were bold enough to knock all of his other thoughts out of the park. Her words stung, seeing her on the verge of crying hurt. Why couldnât he just stop upsetting people? All the anger thatâd previously taut the muscles in his body was released, as he found it difficult to control the vulnerability that began to seep through. âRightâŠâ
âI was upset, and didnât want to be.â Kiran replied, a little defeated. He still couldnât believe Benji actually hated him. âIf you wanted me to âfightâ for you, you should have told me that when you broke up with me. Iâm not a mind reader. Weâre not in some next level film. You break up with someone because you donât dig them anymore, and thatâs what you did. Letâs just leave this conversation, Benj, thereâs no point. Yeah. Youâre right. Never cared about you. Obviously, since I introduced you to my mum. Let you get close to her. You know, the most important person in my life. So, just gonna take my selfish self and go fuck Amma Avery with her perfectly distanced eyes and perfectly round ass. Just stay out of my life.âÂ
She let him talk --and talk. She kept silent, trying her best to not get even more upset than she already was. And no matter how much she tried, the more he went on the more it felt like he was rubbing salt in open wounds. Benji wanted to run and keep running until Kiran Khan was nothing but a dumb ex boyfriend --until he couldnât hurt her anymore. âKiran, stop. I donât care. You have such a comfortable fucking life and the only thing you have to worry about is getting married and your parents divorcing. So tough. So fucking tough. Your mother would let you out of it if youâd just be honest with her. Your dadâs a dick but I wouldnât doubt heâd do the same. They love you and not just because you can be married off. You just going out and fucking girls all the time is just a slap in the face to them and those girls and you fucking know it.âÂ
Just stay out of my life. Her eyes locked with his as she wiped each tear thatâd fallen from her cheeks. âKiran, I am --was in love with you. I know that you donât know much about my past. And I know that Iâd rather you just pretend Iâve had a life like you had. But Iâm so used to people leaving --dying and I was scared. You donât get that. You donât know how that feels even if you think that you do. I canât ask you to fight for me or want me. Thatâs not fair..to me. You should want to do it yourself. And maybe,â She had to stop to catch her breath, âI needed you to come after me because no one ever does, Kiran. If Iâm the only one who wants to fight for someone, they why the fuck am I fighting. I want to hate you! I want you to be nothing to me. And trust me, Iâm not coming back this time. I promise you I will stay out of your life. I donât even want to be in it -- not if I feel like this every time I see you.â














