Aspiration & Desire @andsoshewill - Tumblr Blog

Wow, I haven’t been here in years. I’m back bc I needed a place I can be vulnerable and out loud even tho I’m ashamed. I needed a place where no one really knows me. I should feel safe to do this with people in my life but I’ve isolated so much and I dunno. I’m just so lost. I’m so sad. So discontent. So frustrated.

Three Point Lake (my name), near Kenora, Ontario. • Slept like shit last night but woke up to the first morning with good weather at this camp. Getting here took work; my Jeep lived a real #jeeplife ha, more on that later. • I’ll stay here awhile. • Shorts and barefoot on the bottom, jacket on top lol. Too cold for me without direct sunlight. https://www.instagram.com/p/Bx-PXb_BDZ1/?igshid=1b98mm0txa6xr

#jeeplife

Red wine & tears

I can’t talk to anyone so I came here

I haven’t been here in a long time.

Ive been soo sad. So hurt. So mad at myself. I feel like I’m in the most consistently dark place I’ve ever been in. I’m ruining my life. I’ve never thought about dying so much.

I finally found love. Don’t think it’s for me. I can’t handle it. I’m too broken. I need too much.

I want to disappear. But at all the same I just want the means to wander. I’ll be sad but I can be sad and in awe of the world.

1️⃣4️⃣ days ‘til I’m in the land of sun, sand, sea and some of the best friends a gal can have. • PS. Don’t tell aunt Dene I’m comin’ (at The Bahamas)