"No, no -- Go back to sleep."
"How long before the kids go to college and we have time for ourselves again?"
"Lose my job? I didn't lose it. It's not like, 'Whoops! Where'd my job go?' I QUIT."
"Drink up. Whiskey’s God’s way of letting us know he loves us and he wants us to be happy."
"Maybe we didn't raise him/her the way we should have. Maybe we went wrong somewhere."
"No, don't just say you're fine. Where's the doctor? Let me go speak to the doctor."
"Shush, it's fine. They won't hear us."
"What the hell have you been smoking?
"Do we need anything else, d'you think? Do we still have milk at home?"
"Do people really fall for that line?"
"Stop it. Stop crying. You're going to make me cry -- Goddamn it."
"Wait, did you just call me 'honey'? We just met."
"Sometimes I worry that you're just a really great dream."
"Fuck, I told you not to leave any hickeys."
"What are you smiling about?"
"Shouldn't you get that? What if it's important?"
"You're really killing the mood."
"What happened to 'we should never go to bed angry at each other'? Talk to me."
"Be careful when you let our baby sleep in our bed, okay? Don't crush him/her."
"I don't care what happens to be, don't you get it? I don't care if I live or die."
"Jesus Christ, take it easy next time. Look at these nail marks."
"You're so fucking immature, you know that? I don't know how I can stand you."
"It's not that I don't trust you, I don't trust him/her."
"I don't know whether to interpret that as a good thing, or a bad thing."
"I mean it. Just say the word, and I'll kill him."
"I told you I didn't want kids when we first got married! We're not negotiating my uterus."
"You broke my heart. Now you want to be 'friends'?"
"Come on, jump. I dare you."
"Tell me about your dream."
"Wake up. You don't want to sleep all night on the couch, do you? C'mon, come to bed."
"What? I have no idea what you're talking about."
"You know I hate the word mistress."
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