angie writes the wildflower @angiewrites - Tumblr Blog

31 (bonus)

these poems are our stories

observations and over-hears eavesdrops and heart-to-hearts cried yourself to sleeps sang it in the showers strangers on a train arguing lovers in back rows of planes children on school buses giggling hands clasped together in church sitting wide-legged on stoops long walks for miles on city blocks quiet moments in bed in the morning disappointments you already knew were coming unexpected joys girlfriends clinking glasses at their favorite cafe or whispering and snickering in groups babies bouncing from knee to knee mourning the loss of a friend that peculiar phone call that skips your heartbeat that wondering what do they want

my poems are all these things and a million more a telling a remembering

of all my stories and yours

#angie writes #poetry #30 for 30 #30for30 august #outbursts #write through it #poems #black women writers #tell your story #31 days #bonus

30

feeling the seasons change deeply the length of the day's shortening the coolness of the mornings the brisk breeze in the evening I am in love with Autumn the death of overheating the rebirth of new energies the harvest of longer nights for dreaming bursts of colors richer than Spring golden warmth sweet oranges and chocolates on the horizon are oases the refuge of taking in another year cuddled up to reflection what we've gone through what we achieved what we survived the way we are alive

#angie writes #poetry #write through it #30 for 30 #30for30 august #outbursts #autumn #life love beauty

29

what if praise dances flourished into a march? what if we shouted to high heaven till justice rained down?

what if scripture spewed devoid of Love exclusion rather than embrace was replaced with liberation and support to run this race

if we expect to see the master’s face

what if the whole armor of God was taken up to liberate

what if prayer was always a battle cry

what if sanctuaries were always safe havens

what if tithes in the storehouse made a way for every walk of us

we who believe in freedom are called to task faith without works is but a mask

#angie writes #poetry #thirty for thirty #30for30 august #30 for 30 #30 for 30 august #write through it #liberation #salvation #freedom #justice #outbursts

28

I jolted awake asking myself what in this world or the next were you doing in my dream

it was beautiful when I saw you aged just so and grinning

me glowing with acceptance as if what occurred had not as if it would be easy to just gloss over being left for dead with a life

but under the haze of REM rose-colored flecks glisten in between the lines of your smile remember the time sparkles in the curve of your beard

I forget briefly the coldness of days gone by the whys and what made you do thats leaning in you kiss my cheek and I wake up in a smoldering sweat

#angie writes #poetry #write through it #outbursts #30for30 august #30 for 30 august #thirty for thirty #dreams #lucid dreaming

27

bending and stooping digging through linens etched with conceptions and confessions pillows talking and towels fluffed up lining the bottom of wardrobes under blankets, comforters Quilts and sheets all manner of fleeces or the perfect rag a washcloth folded tighter than the crispest napkin standing up I look for any indication that I got through to you down in the kitchen where the dishes pile up it's better than dirty laundry the hearth is warm with food and conversation explanations that never quite suffice

#angie writes #poetry #write through it #outbursts #thirty for thirty #30 for 30 august #30 for 30 #30for30 august

26

i want to be the one you’re breaking your neck to get back to not the one you get around to

I don’t want to keep trying to get blood from a rock I’m too old to be a young man’s holy grail

ruminating on the same dry chance a cake walk turned to gauntlet I think on those times squeezed in intimate places pushed together on a bench in the morning

or over-loving in the faces of mourning hands outstretched only to jam pointers on plexiglas

unsolicited professions of Love flung out like Hail Marys when the game is on the line

Like

How many times do you stack us up like jenga blocks to purposefully knock it down fistfuls of sheet music in an ill-fitting room

don’t take it personal do not assume I can’t still be here

#angie writes #poetry #30 for 30 #write through it #thirty for thirty #outbursts #30for30 August

25

lingering around the could have beens. understanding full well that what's done is done but allowing yourself the yearning the maybe baby's 'cause baby's more than alright he's perfect and so am I and so is this for each other at least that's what we tell ourselves as our fingertips dawdle as our giggles leave their residue I am me and you are you and we've been here before convinced that we'll find time to be just friends or do that project together but the minute we're alone the rehash begins the if onlys and I wishes that are never uttered it's more like a debate about some misbegotten rendezvous or unfortunate slight that keeps us up all night pretending to blame and fuss soaking up all that is us.

#angie writes #poetry #30 for 30 #30for30 august #30 for 30 august #thirty for thirty #write through it #outbursts #us

24

hot like spaghetti sticking to the roof of your mouth and also like black sand beaches we are ordinary and exotic like ironing my blouse so I'm not late or me taking the rum bottles through customs at the end of a birthday trip like steeling kisses on a subway platform like hot air balloon rides over safaris below like playing an original song for me like ice cubes in your bedside cup like immediately knowing we'd met in another life our Love is

#angie writes #poetry #outbursts #write through it #30 for 30 #30for30 august #30 for 30 august #thirty for thirty #love #us

when I looked up, the night opened and the stars poured down.

Handful - The Invention of Wings

#The Invention Of Wings #Handful #Book Club #women writers #Sue Monk Kidd #story quilt #Hetty Grimke

23

forgiveness is no easy task after time has passed we may feel we have successfully achieved it (because it is an accomplishment)

then a hard memory drags us back to the pain of the offense

maybe tears well up maybe fire shoots from the top of our heads with anger maybe we just start repeating aloud what you said like, ‘how dare you’ be so cruel

we may shake it off and trudge along the high road again but in the end

forgiveness is some very intense forgetting

#angie writes #poetry #outbursts #30 for 30 #30for30 august #30 for 30 august #thirty for thirty #write through it #forgiveness

22

seasons are changing we're slowing locking back into step autumn's crackle in the background your calls I do expect and you expect my messages this year it will be different I don't expect to cut you off fully but I don't expect much I understand that the ending happened already and this is just an epilogue that lasts forever if we let it I know that women don't grow on men you've had access to me for ages but never seemed concerned with keeping me until the radio silence this season I'll be around we'll probably still laugh we'll probably see a movie and lay with an uncertainty in between but it's different now this chance unlike the others is just for you to pass time to incite a smile or the comfort of another human I've accepted that what I thought I wanted is just not the make and model and that you can't see me anyway and I don't need your choosing

#angie writes #poetry #outbursts #write through it #30for30 august #30 for 30 august #thirty for thirty #love #wisdom

21

frantically racing back and forth chased by "what will they think?" nerves jumping off cliffs in your stomach sweating you stand at the brink needing 48-hour days and a lot more money you pause who does this for me? who is running around like chickens without heads like weary monks chanting far from their beds after climbing a mountain retreat? who is the mirror of your wavelength? who can you point to driven by love or guilt or the need for approval or the chance to stay included or whatever deep reason you have for being over the top to the point of remaining at the bottom who can you say returns the favor? if you find one or the miracle of two is it the same person you sweat for now? is he or she who elongates your days and shrinks your pockets one of them? one of those somebodies who'd do the same for you? not that giving needs a reason but who fills you back up? why are you a martyr for takers more and some more and "oh, you're just such!" don't die on the hill of doing too much

#angie writes #30 for 30 august #write through it #poetry #outbursts #selfcare

20

you belong here don't believe the lies that uncertainty tries to tell you you've been given these gifts long before the first time your grandmother ever pressed her hand on your mother's growing tummy or onto your cheeks sometimes a dark cold chokehold grips you briefly saying you don't deserve this space that no one knows you that you are from nowhere but remember grandmother's face from dusty backroads and no running water to big city dreams from daughter to daughter that magical determination is passed along whip smart sharp heart all of those things are in you when you step up to do what only you can do it's backed by the weight of those roads train rides each summer to factories turn to train rides all the time with daiquiris and other elixirs of a better life you are welcome you fit right in because you don't sore thumbs shine bright diamonds in the rough get picked chosen, elevated here you are whether concrete or southern heat a rose is still a rose And you belong here.

#angie writes #poetry #30for30 august #30 for 30 august #thirty for thirty #write through it #outbursts #dreams #goals #making it

19

what happens when you hear from God but you don't like the news? grappling with the inevitable you're thankful that you were chosen graced with a heads up a nudge to prepare thankful that your gifts allow you to experience the knowing but how do you handle not liking what you learn? how do you get ready for what you don't want? when you are in a constant state of prayer since your empathy runs over you receive messages you'd rather not know but where do you go? it's within the stillness that you grow See you can't escape God and the signals sent you Hear what is whispered you understand what it meant and it guts you. but you survive. it's all in how you handle it

#angie writes #poetry #outbursts #30 for 30 august #thirty for thirty #write through it #empaths #knowing

angiewrites

I swear I go through these things so I can testify.

- angie (via soulfuloutbursts)

#for the soul #outbursts #testimony #life lessons #resilience #healing

18

Boredom is a funny thing like hope it will have you trying different angles poking prodding twisting situations around like a Rubik's cube the first 89 times this thing wasn't healthy but it interests you so you're willing to get hurt up just to understand just to to try to win! I can't go through this again but you do! and they do and so do I you're aching and embarrassed but you have to know why we just keep pressing reset because we're bored because we're lonely because we hope you are new because you can get addicted to excitement to the roller coaster of drama and pain or to the quiet wince of repeated rejection boredom and hope can be escapes it's easier to complain or to focus on hypothetical halcyon days than to fix our own mistakes or do better

#angie writes #poetry #30for30 august #30 for 30 #thirty for thirty #write through it #outbursts #for the soul

17

we need each other we are better as a unit we come to this conclusion at different times me eons ago you light years from now struggles ensue because we both want to be seen we have a dream we are one what you fight for daily is always my point blaring over loudspeakers audience locked in I cheer for you but your ears are clogged with ambition and new found fame believing the hype misconstrues the meaning when you came to me originally my arms were a canyon so much room for you there strangers squeezed in innumerable scratching us as they scoot their chairs around their applause may warm you briefly but they don't know intent we need each other your greatness cancels out my weakness your errors correct themselves under my edit wisdom is a balm remember tomorrow when things will get a little easier when we're closer to finishing the beginning

#angie writes #poetry #outbursts #30 for 30 august #30for30 august #30 for 30 #thirty for thirty #write through it #movement

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