The official charity event of Ray-Ban sunglasses, all styles of glasses are only $24.99! We will donate 50% of the profits to the COVID-19 epidemic prevention department. Every purchase is your support for charity, thank you!
The official charity event of Ray-Ban sunglasses, all styles of glasses are only $24.99! We will donate 50% of the profits to the COVID-19 epidemic prevention department. Every purchase is your support for charity, thank you!
The official charity event of Ray-Ban sunglasses, all styles of glasses are only $24.99! We will donate 50% of the profits to the COVID-19 epidemic prevention department. Every purchase is your support for charity, thank you!
TO ALL HOMESTUCK FANS: OUR FANMADE SBURB SIMULATOR IS NOW ON STEAM (IT'S MULTIPLAYER!!!)
TELL YOUR FRIENDS, TELL YOUR FAMILY, TELL YOUR PETS, TELL YOUR 4000 KARKAT PLUSHIES, AND REBLOG THIS POST FOR THE LOVE OF GOG
(Note: The previous version of this post was mysteriously deleted. This is a repost.)
The Genesis Project is now on Steam!
Featuring big quality of life changes, a complete networking rework based on Steam servers, and way more, too much to list here!
Play SBURB right now with your friends! Play it with your siblings! Play it with your teachers! Play it with your enemies! Play it with your non-fandom friends and make them suffer with you!
Download it right here, right now:
LINK TO THE STEAM PAGE FOR THE GENESIS PROJECT (EARLY ACCESS)
Link to our Discord server (talk to the devs, get updates, and find people to play with!)
Since Twitter is imploding, I'm preserving my play by plays of my mom adventuring with me in Eorzea and her reaction to MSQ.
Let's begin!
Aug. 31, 2019
So I've gotten my mom to try FFXIV and she is level 14 right now and practicing her targeting/killing moves!
Current skills we are working on: the basic archer rotation, targeting, switching targets when more than one critter is aggroed...and noticing when things are dead/she's being attacked.
She likes that chocobo porter thing
Cue eyerolls at Beatin's name
"Yeah, that's pretty creepy" - my mom about the Monoa mask
"Why are they all just standing there?"
"Small budget."
This just in, we made it to Limsa Lominsa! Next up: Ul'dah!
She is now roaming around Ul'dah, ignoring all unsolicited FC invites from strangers
*stares at Ifrit-egi* "What's the flaming thing?"
Level 16!
She thought the aesthetician was hilarious. We're done for the day, just before unlocking Sastasha. Not sure if she'll survive her first dungeon experience...I will have to conscript my friends into helping her!
Dec. 8, 2019
Okay, got a trial account set up for my mom so I could actually help her in-game...
...she went max-height max-muscle femroe this time.
7'3'' of pure power, smacks ladybugs with books
Dec. 15, 2019
weewooweewoo my mom's femroe is loose in eorzea again
eventually within the next hour this laptop will get it together and I will be able to follow her around in-game maybe
my fps is low so I'm running super slow my mom is now making fun of my short legs
I just took her for the laggiest ride in eorzea
She's doing the orange harvesting quest and whenever the flower wesp spawns I'm just yelling "BEES BEEEEEES BEEEEEEEEEEEES" the look on her face tells me this is not helpful
i'm so proud look at her go
she put on the level 5 caster gear and yelled "I LOOK LIKE SOMETHING OUT OF THE HOBBIT"
Feb. 16, 2020
Mom's femroe made it to level 12...lots of 'why am i getting hit???' 'oh my god' 'okay wait i remember how to do this' 'no i don't' meanwhile, I just cast a regen as she panics, get all the aggro, and Gravity everything to death once she's done beating up a couple mobs.
Apr. 19, 2020
*puts together a 'running around with mom' glam that looks like normal IRL clothes* LET'S SEE IF SHE NOTICES
My mom: "I noticed the shorts. I CAN RECOGNIZE THOSE CARGO SHORTS ANYWHERE."
Me: "Is it easier to tell what's going on with the voices [instead of reading the fairly small text]"
Mom: "....maybe...even if the voice acting is..." ARR voice acting gets a negative mark from my mom, officially
May 3, 2020
my mom just fell asleep listening to ARR Minfilia like...mid button press
Jul 4, 2020
My mom has named her chocobo Kweh.
"What do you want to name it?"
"Hmmmm.....that sound it makes."
"'Kweh'?"
"Yes!"
Jul 7, 2020
Mom: "What's that blue thing following you"
Me: "that's my friend he keeps me company"
Mom: "that reminds me I should summon mine" *summons carbuncle*
Jul 19, 2020
(DragonQuest collab)
My mom's reaction to getting 'ze puff-puff' was a mix of '???' and 'wtf' and ' :O ' when the puff-puff was revealed
XD
I also showed her my Cells at Work! cosplays and she thought they were pretty good although she was totally groaning at yet another reference to Cells at Work
Jul 28, 2020
(moonfire faire)
okay my mom is level 27 i can get her to get to 30 before the event and we can fend off giant muscle shark TOGETHER
Aug 15, 2020
doing the seasonal event at last with my mom~
she ran from the giant bomb at the very end and didn't get credit RIP
hmm she still didn't get credit, gonna have to try doing it for her...
okay she was not getting close enough to do the first dance...just imagine wild flailing and button smashing
her pride was injured since she got partial credit so she has gone back to do it again by herself
:D
"I didn't realize she was so green, can I change that" rip she'll have to get that free fantasia
Aug 22, 2020
Me as my mom is logging in: Eeeey look at you, in your summer outfit
Mom: That's right, and I'm gonna wear it all summer!!
Wilred: "and sorry for trying to kill you"
Mom: Lame
she dislikes him already
Aug 23, 2020
My mom quickly formed a low opinion of Trachtoum and then laughed when the miller put him in his place. Then she lost the rock competition and said her ego would kill her if she didn’t beat him on normal
My mom did not like that her new upgrade did not disguise itself as her summer flame pareo immediately
Her max height Roegadame reeling at the smell of Brayflox's cheese was priceless, she practically vaulted out of camera view
Sept. 19, 2020
Mom: *sees someone on Midgardsormr* I want a dragon...
Me: You'll get one
Mom: Hmm...still not as cool as the sparkle lightning horse.
Me: Oh that...I have that
Mom: =_= Oh? Then why are we riding your flea-bitten chocobo instead??
Me: ...it's...not a 2-seater...
Mom: figures
Sept 26, 2020
My mom is taller than Haurchefant
Oct 11, 2020
My mom was deeply offended by the professor's students who kept giving us the wrong kind of corrupted crystal, so when the third one tried to joke that we had gotten earth-aspected her face was like =_=
She's made it past Garuda in MSQ, right now I'm just unsyncing the trials to help her with mechanics
She has 4 whole minions now and decided to change it from her brickman...however she discovered she hates the goobbue sprout, called it a mushroom and went 'ew' when it sneezed XD She really likes the airship though
Oct 17, 2020
Your daily sploot as my mom plays through MSQ
mom just called Minfilia 'pink bustier'
my dog totally chewed up my second gaming mouse rip
I don't care about the teeth marks but I DO care that she deformed the rubber portion of the scroll wheel so I can't scroll...
Made it to Mor Dhona! yaaay
she's like half an inch taller than Biggs
Oct 27, 2020
it's getting to the point where I should probably learn how to play SMN so I can help my mom out
I've programmed her crossbar for future and was like "THERE ARE SO MANY BUTTONS WHERE DO I PUT THEM ALL"
Last time she played I set up the WXHB but I don't know how this will go
Our latest adventure involved the Gold Saucer, also. She got to do Air Force One and said it was fun XD She also enjoyed the Haunted Manor illusions although she had limited options due to being in ARR.
Fingers crossed I can show her leap of faith although the floating city is kinda rough, we might wanna aim for the other one...I think that's on a schedule, right?
oh good the catboy at the counter in GC gives me the schedule
ANYWAY she's getting close to the end of ARR now, so I have to make her do leveling dungeon once each play session XD fun times. I will most likely unsync castrum and prae so she doesn't have to deal with buttheads potentially
Nov 7, 2020
My mom hit level 49 today! I eagerly took her into leveling, thinking we'd get a good chunk in, but... ...fucking Garuda twice in a row =\
Anyway she should hit 50 tomorrow! Then I'll take her through Castrum and Prae (unsynced for Prae for sure, otherwise the usual PUG speed means she'll be running through in utter confusion and not processing anything)
I'm kinda on the fence about castrum unsynced. It's a bit less annoying with a full group so I don't have to do e v e r y t h i n g but I also don't like salty people near my mom so...hm.
also she was like "So when do I get to see the fanzine you contributed to?" and I was like "*NERVOUS SIDE-EYING* uh when you're caught up with me" the struggles of spoiler territory
Nov 8, 2020
Well mom and I were gearing up to hit castrum but then my dad called from the grocery store because he forgot his wallet
And then the internet died
made it through castrum! But with all the delays, no Prae today...ah well
Nov 14, 2020
it's time
time to take my mom through prae
me: LOOK WE'RE IN A CUTSCENE TOGETHER
mom: oh okay
mom, in old creaking voice while watching Gaius: it is your destiny, Luke
ground targeting on controller is tough :X
mom, watching Nero: so...a jealous classmate?
so in cutscenes she takes up the entire side of the screen she's on for me, while in her cutscenes Ameme is either hidden behind her or is just a little face staring in a corner
Mom: that was fun
she likes dodging lasers???
The Praetorium completion time: 68:19
sorry lalas and lala fans, my mom still thinks lalafells walk like toddlers carrying a full load in the diapers
Well she unlocked flying but can't seem to fly with her company chocobo, not sure what we have to do to fix that...
Nov 15, 2020
mom used her free fantasia to make her roegadame less green
mom has just discovered minfilia's butt window
'is that her butt hanging out of a hole?'
'yep'
'whyyyy'
Nov 20, 2020
Mom does CT raids! I really suck at this
Nov 22, 2020
Mom now heading to Syrcus tower! Now with better set-up
Nov 23, 2020
Into the World of Darkness!
Nov 24, 2020
me: so the theme for this primal sounds just like This Is Halloween
mom: *after a few measures* you know I'm pretty sure it IS This Is Halloween
elidibus is so small compared to her
on Teledji Adeledji: "A toddler with a goatee"
Nov 27, 2020
Mom back on MSQ, aka the rise and fall of alphinaud’s ego
So far most of playtime has been spent terrorizing her by asking her to find places on her own
Her sense of direction in games is a travesty because she does not look for landmarks ever
Mom was like “THEY STOLE THAT FROM TRUE LIES!! Is he going to pee his pants next??” after we got to Trachtuom
Leviathan vanquished~
She has found post ARR story much more interesting so far and I have promised her it gets better
Nov 28, 2020
and we are back at it again, time to watch my mom get lost in limsa
i will eventually get my mom to call mor dhona 'more donuts'
i drew a terrible map to show her what's going on with the refugees and Ala Mhigo in the hopes that she will remember somewhat in the future
Nov 29, 2020
last day of vacation, how far can we get my mom through MSQ...? maybe she will meet Ysayle!
mor dhona currently pronounced 'more dunna'
after I said 'more donuts' she said 'didn't you promise me sprinkles' but she actually meant sparkly gear so she could see herself better
mom on urianger: "he sounds like a pompous preacher"
"Why do they call her Antecedent?" I had to look the word up, it means 'precursor', mom was like 'maybe she founded the organization' and I was like 'yep'
I'm waiting for her to get locked out because we haven't done the hard ARR primal modes yet XD
All right so we ended up finishing When the Cold Sets In because the cold has indeed set in so we have to walk Brie at a certain time every day so it's not too cold/dark. I think next session I'll have her do the primals since that's coming up soon anyway...
Dec 5, 2020
and we're back at it! Watching my mom run around the Toll trying to find the crystal brave recruits now
she's gotten more self-sufficient so I'm not leading her around by the hand anymore in small areas XD
"It says to talk to Tataru in Rising Stones"
"and where is that"
*excited* "WAIT IT'S OVER HERE :D"
I also showed her Yoshi-P showing off the snowman mount, the momora mora minion, and the giant beaver
she asked where the beaver's tail was and I was like 'I dunno I'm pretty sure it's a vampiric hamster'
must...restrain...hatred...of ilberd...
she's really navigating eorzea all on her own...i'm so proud...
eeey she passed the 'find the rising stones after I dump you in a random spot in the Toll's aetheryte plaza' test
she failed the 'go to the waking sands' pop quiz, sadly
Ifrit hard down, and done for the day!
Dec 6, 2020
time to terrorize my mom with the 'how do you get to the waking sands' game
she hates titan once more
she just went 'eh *handwiggle*' at aymeric's voice
the judgment has been passed
'you know what his voice reminds me of? those 17th century lords and ladies with their lace and their snuff. bleah'
her reaction to Lucia was just 'who's blondie?' and then a heavy sigh when I refused to tell her
upon seeing me riding the great serpent of ronka pot: 'are you riding a wine cask?!'
okay, quit just before snowcloak, we'll do that dungeon next weekend ran around the gold saucer for a bit at the end XD
verdict on the senor sabotender weapons: "No."
Dec 12, 2020
Mom just called Varis "Mr Discontent"
Ilberd: let's be sneaky
Mom, sarcastically: Oh yeah I'll be very unnoticeable wherever I go
she just got her evenstar coat, I told her to put it on
"OH MY GOD MY BOOBS ARE HANGING OUT"
"IT TOTALLY LOOKS LIKE I COULD BE IN A CASINO"
"I THINK IT'S PRETTY COOL ACTUALLY"
*5 minutes later* "So when do I get to stop looking like a circus clown?" XD she doesn't like the skirt on it
Oooo we're about to meet Moenbryda!
She's taller than Moenbryda ahahaha
on Urianger and Moenbryda: "...he doesn't like her?"
me: oh he likes her... *Moen picks Uri up* ...she just does that.
her current feelings: voice acting is better, story is more interesting, but there is a LOT of talking
at least Minfilia isn't instantly putting her to sleep anymore.
Dec 13, 2020
Mom: "Alphinaud causing problems yet again..."
Mom, to Roaille: *muttering* gonna smack you with my book
Me: your book with two ipads attached?
Mom: yeah
Mom: *watching Teledji Adeledji be evil* ...is he about to bump [the sultana] off? I hope she keeps a blade in her bodice
"I can't imagine what my shirt would look like if I had chosen big boobs" ahahahahaha
NPC: "So she was a double agent!"
Mom: "Sounds more like triple"
Me: "...IT WAS THE ASCIANS WHO HAD HER FUNDING HERETICS!! A QUADRUPLE AGENT!!"
Yuyuhase casting aspersions on Riol's spy ability HOW DARE
keeper of the lake unlocked and ready for the next play session~
Dec 19, 2020
Mom and I successfully cleared Keeper of the Lake! No wipes even on Midgardsormr!
she's making fun of how slow Midgardsormr speaks ahaha
she promptly summoned him as a minion
"So now I've lost the protection I didn't even know I had?"
Middy: I REMEMBER, HYDAELYN...AND I CONSENT
Me: Consent is important!
Mom: What is he talking about???
It's Starlight time with Mom~
"I feel like we just finished watching a Hallmark movie"
"...and not enough vaccines to go around...WHEN DID THEY WRITE THIS?? =\ "
she actually started wheezing at the snowman mount as we bounced around central shroud
when it was time to log out, she specifically went out of the Rising Stones so she could log out as a snowman
Dec 20, 2020
Mom: I liked her, it's a pity they killed her off
RIP Moenbryda
next up: HILDIBRAND for some whiplash
"It's very slapstick/vaudeville" after snorting with laughter at Hildy on top of the tower posing
"So...he's not a zombie?"
"No...but he survived all of that..."
"Including the burial..."
"Yeah. We don't know what he's made of."
"I'm going with 'mostly ego'."
sighs of annoyance as she gets lost in Ul'dah
I asked her if she liked it so far and she said 'Yeah, it's pretty funny!'
during the salamander oil section when hildy's getting all orgasmic: "At this point I would've knocked him in and held his head under the water"
"So...we didn't find anything."
"I mean Nashu got the hair ointment"
her roe is so fucking tall the card went flying half-hidden at the bottom of the screen omg
Dec 24, 2020
here we go again
We are on Mask of Grief. Closing in on HW!!
Dragons fly overhead. “Where are they going??” “Ishgard!” “Well that’s not good”
Brostinien spotted
“Why can’t I ride my snowman indoors!!?? :( “
Alphinaud was such a terrible negotiator back then
Hahaha watching him get slapped down by Merlwyb...still funny
“You would entrust the future of Eorzea to a bunch of sellswords??” Alphinaud we are right here how DARE
Pranks mom by photobombing with snowman any time she talks to an NPC
Steps of Faith here we come! *sits in queue*
Success. Much easier nowadays I have to say.
Mom when Minfilia gets an invite to a banquet: “is this a trap”
I showed her Thancred and all his girlfriends and she shook her head
She wanted to log out on her snowman
Dec 25, 2020
it's time
fingers crossed we can get to the end of post-ARR...
mom laughing at Tataru's arcanist mishaps
when WoL just nods: "well I'm certainly supportive =\ "
she loves the beach when there's no sand to torture her, like the real beach she was stuck at the other day
after Tataru glances back fondly in cutscene: "WHAT was that look. It PORTENDS something TERRIBLE. She's going to TURN INTO SOMETHING--"
Chewchewchewchew
Whenever my mom goes into the rising stones, she just smashes her character's face into the door before selecting the entrance
Minfilia talking about how she'd rather stay home than go to the party and I feel that
Riol briefing us, I remind my mom that Mirage Trust is owned by Teledji and she said "I had a feeling"
he's one of the few characters she can remember XD
mom when she's flying to the place to meet Alianne: "Another chance to use my snowman :D"
just got the long cutscene warning, here it comes
mom as nanamo lifts cup to her lips: "She's being poisoned!!"
as nanamo falls: "that wasn't obvious at all"
When the vial is revealed: "So that's what it was for!"
Ilberd: "The poison did its work swiftly. Her handmaiden can attest to that."
Mom, pretending to be handmaiden: "Yes, I made the batch myself!"
Teledji Adeledji bisected: "*nod* I like it."
Raubahn's arm removed: "Gross!"
Other alliance members leave: "Abandon ship!"
Raubahn frees WoL: "All right! I'm gonna whip out my book and wave it!"
"They killed everyone off for the new thingy? And just when I started getting used to their names..."
Me: "Alphinaud's having a crisis"
Mom: "~it's all my faaaault~"
Me: "It IS his fault!!"
Mom: "Yeah, it is..."
