Going Nowhere Fast

[anoldhome]

Class sent me back to first year so enjoy

It’s so easy to not get out of bed when you don’t even remember getting into bed. 

My days blur together.

My head whirls.

Am I sober? Am I alive?

Nothing feels real, except for my bed.

Days past, at least I think

for time is not something I keep.

Care, hygiene, love, is not something I keep. 

I keep nothing. 

But do not think I have nothing

I have something. 

That something is nothing. 

A nothingness that lingers in me. 

A nothingness that replaces emotions. 

A nothingness that replaces survival. 

Am I alive? Am I awake?

For each passing day feels like a dream

and I keep falling

and falling

into nothing. 

I don’t know when I eat, when I drink, when I live. 

I don’t know if I am dreaming or blacking. 

Am I awake? Am I supposed to be?

Because I thought it would happen last month. 

Because I thought it would happen last week.

Because I thought it would happen yesterday. 

Maybe this means I’m supposed to be

but who believes in signs when you only have nothing.

Am I supposed to be? Am I here?

I don’t want to be here. 

I will not get out of bed. 

I will not get out of bed. 

For when I do, my bed is not the only thing I will leave behind. 

[anoldhome]

Love is a choice, not a feeling.

Love isn't a feeling. It's a choice. You have to choose to love someone. Why? Well, let's start with the biological breakdown on love.

Love is made of feel good hormones like oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin, which fire off when you encounter something enjoyable. So when you meet someone who is interesting, they can start to stimulate these neurotransmitters which sends all these happy feelings through your body. However, as time passes, this new person will no longer be new in your life and that stimulation that they sparked, will no longer happen due to your body adapting to this person and so all those strong feel good feelings you had at first, won't be around anymore.

Secondly, feelings are fleeting. People switch though feelings faster than they switch apps on their phones. If your relationship is reliant on the feeling of love, you're in for a rough time.

Third, it's basically impossible to always feel happy and lovely feelings for your partner. There will be one day where they'll do something incredibly stupid and hurtful and you'll feel a horrible tug in your chest when they tell you. There'll be one day where they come home and snap at you because they had a shit day and while they didn't mean to, they're seeing too much red to apologize right away. There'll be one day where it'll seem like nothing is working in both of your lives, and for a second you'll wonder if your relationship is working too. It's in these moments of dire and tiredness that you realize love in a choice. Because no matter how difficult the circumstances, how hurtful the action, how tiresome the situation, you have to choose to love them through the thick and thin. You can't rely on a fleeting feeling to get you through the lowest of the lows because when you're in the lowest of lows, sometimes you don't feel anything. This is when you have to choose. You have to choose to love them.

Making love a choice strengthens the relationships. It helps to clear insecurities. Just because there is someone else more attractive in the world, your partner is choosing to love you. Just because some other person has a crush on them, they are choosing to love you. Just because you have all these flaws and you view yourself through an extremely critical lens, they still choose to love you.

Love is choice. Find someone who will choose you.

[anoldhome]

Someone save me from this nightmare

[56blogsstillcrazy]

why chloe moretz eating spaghetti from wooden boxes?why everyone lookin in the camera??WHY SOME DUDE SUCKIN DICK???

[chvrlieherbs-deactivated2022021]

Why is her date using chop sticks

[justcariii]

Wtf is this lmao

[zendayasauntiewig-blog]

we’ve been having a full on debate about this picture at work and I’m so tired

[dongstomper-deactivated20161230]

im like 90% certain the dude sucking dick is from a different picture so who put him there

[yeah-yeah-beebiss-1]

???????

[avant-gardevoir-old-deactivated]

The funny thing is, those two are photoshopped into THAT picture as well

[stebbyfrenchguy]

where are they from send them home

[tsunglasses]

This is absurd because the original image is by far the most surreal one

[pro-diversity]

english teacher: why is there so much conflict throughout history?

me:

[wunner-deactivated20231205]

u were cool but nah fuck u

[anoldhome]

I have honestly never been so happy as I am now. I have found someone who not only accepts me completely for who I am, but encourages me to better myself in the ways I want to and is constantly rooting and supporting me. I found someone who is quick to call me out on my bullshit and stop me from making stupid decisions. I found someone who loves me to his fullest capacity and I love him to mine. After some rocky relationships and the consistent feeling of never being good enough, I finally feel like I am.

[anoldhome]

I can’t sleep

[duriantao-deactivated20160430]

why can’t non-asian fans love asian entertainment industries without trying to change their whole identity and race and culture trying to turn whatever particular culture they are fans of like???? you can watch bollywood films, hong kong films, jam to cpop and kpop and read mangas and manhwas without fucking changing your race and culture in order to try and become An Asian™

[dopeybeauty]

when people ask how long you’ve been online

[friendly-neighborhood-patriarch]

I’m called out

[gservator]

I feel so attacked

[lagonegirl]

i’m speechless

This is how the system of white supremacy  operates. The media is used 2 create stereotypes like blk on blk crime.They need black men to fill jail cells for the Prison Indstrial complex

You know what? I’m tired of this. I do not know what exactly they are waiting for. I mean our government comes up with “reasons” to invade other countries, such as Syria, like their government is allegedly violating human rights or something like that. but… I mean for other countries, they do not even have to go deep to bomb the fuck out of this place, they can just look at our media. And this has been happening to people of color since the media has existed.

I’ll never forget this 👇🏾

[starsfadingbutilingeron]

honestly same

[raynarvaezjrr]

“how did your internet addiction start”

[thebootydiaries]

[glowedwoc-deactivated20170406]

Okay but who says i totally bombed that exam? muslims do this to get attention lmao and then be like HOW DARE YOU MISUNDERSTAND ME

[thebootydiaries]

…….everyone? “that movie was a total bomb at the box office”? “had an interview and i bombed it”? ????¿¿¿

[tsukkiaf]

my fave kind of fandom merch is the subtle kind you can have in public in which someone could easily just mistake it for an aesthetic statement

[library-mermaid-blog]

Customers who get angry when I read them their total cost are so compelling to me. Take charge of your narrative, Janice. Be the hero of your own story. You are the one who is purchasing $113.67 worth of adult zen coloring books, Janice. It’s not me you hate, Janice. It’s not me.

[nickyflowers]

on the third day, jesus was coming out of his cave and he was doing just fine

[fridjitzu]

judas: it was only a kiss, how did it end up like this