‘ because i would have believed you ! ’ the shout bursts from her lips and she jumps back immediately after, brown eyes wide because she’s not supposed to be the one shouting, especially not at stiles because stiles is the one who’s hurt, stiles is the one who’s been hurt, stiles is the one who’s supposed to be yelling at her, not the other way around. it comes back to her, it always comes back to her..she keeps making mistakes and now she’s making more and more without even realizing it. theo may have been the spark that started to tear her pack apart but, she was the flame that burned it all down. ‘ i didn’t-i didn’t mean, i was just-, she was-, you were going to ? ’
‘ i didn’t know, i didn’t know, i’m sorry. ’ familiar and heavy guilt threatens to swallow her whole, instead settling in a heavy weight in her chest. stiles was going to tell her, he was going to trust her and believe in her and all those things she had asked him to do and he almost had and she had cut him down before he had even had a chance. every word hit her like a bullet, every time she thought of something to say she was hit with another one, another shock of pain to her system. her brown eyes pulled from his gaze, looking everywhere but at him…it was all her fault. ‘ he seemed so..honest, everything he said it was so sincere, i wanted to believe him, in him. i thought that we could help like isaac, like malia and he was just like peter and i should’ve listened to, i should’ve asked. ’
she rubbed the wrist of her sleeves over her eyes, exhaling and inhaling with a harsh breath, a sad and small smile on her lips, ‘ i should listen to you whatever you have to say and never disagree ever for the sake of my wolvlihood, huh ? ’ scarlett pressed her hands against her eyes for a moment, nodding. that had been a stupid question because of course he wasn’t okay, his dad was fighting for his life because of her and she thought he could be okay. the sheriff was her dad in every way that mattered and she was barely okay, anything she was feeling though stiles was definitely feeling it tenfold. this wasn’t a time to have some big emotional fight in the middle of the hospital hallway. the alpha saw his hand tapping, his breath increasing and she wanted to reach out, wrap her hand around his and give him something to ground himself to but, right now her touch would just give him more anxiety so, she quickly just tapped his shoulder, ‘ i think i-i should find my mom now, check your head so, you can get back to your dad. ’
She had looked so betrayed. Which was the emotion that was always playing across his face. How could he be okay when his best friend had assumed the worst out of him? That he would kill without a reason. That he’d gone off the deep end. Donovan’s death had killed him. He wasn’t the same person who’d ran in there. He was whatever the hell he was now.
“You wanted to believe Theo.” He could see why she had wanted to. “Theo used Donovan, you know. To blackmail me. Into keeping quiet about Josh. We were mutually blackmailing each other.” It almost seemed comical now. How they’d only worked together because they were making the other hold a secret from each other.
The human looked down at the floor. Since the start he hadn’t trusted Theo. But everyone else had. And now the pieces of his life were scattered around him. His mind was rushing with every single bad thought he’d ever had. Anxiety was keeping him from feeling calm. Instead he was almost shaking and his eyes were filled with stubbornly unshed tears. “Whatever.” He needed a minute. To try and stop the panic attack that was coming. He could believe for a little while that he could stop it but he could already feel it choking him and knew it wouldn’t help but extend how long he suffered.
