I haven’t written here in quite some time and man do I have a lot to add. In June 2020, the Chases went camping at Lake Livingston State Park. Their friends the Browns were in town and they were going to get together. Kent Brown is a big man with a bigger heart. He loves Jesus fiercely. He’s so prophetic it’s scary. They wanted me to meet him. Hearing Dan talk about the day this happened is so funny. Kent didn’t want to be put on the spot because that’s not how his gifting works. Dan told him no pressure. We just want y’all to meet her. And so we did. I hung out with them, spent a lot of time talking to Kent’s wife Penny. She’s also pretty dang prophetic. Dan and SanDee had purposefully not told Kent anything about me so that if God did have something it wouldn’t be filtered by what Kent had heard about me. We talked, joked, ate a meal and then Kent had this look in his eye. He pulled up a chair across from me, and he started talking. The first thing he said was “what is it that you want to ask the Lord” or something along those lines. At first I was confused. I wasn’t sure why he was saying or where this was going. Then he went on to say “you’re already a minister” and lots of other stuff about how I’m in my educational assignment right now but in 4-5 years I’d be launched and how it will feel like I’m not ready. He talked about the places God was taking me. It was intense. I looked at SanDee and she had her face in her hands because she didn’t want to give anything away to Kent. Dan was just smiling like a proud dad. We met again the next night and more of the same. Kent and penny prayed for me and prophesied over me and honestly I don’t even remember most of it.
Dan and I had talked about how Kent has a bunch of spiritual sons and daughters and how Dan kind of resisted that saying you’re my brother. We’re lateral. And I get it. We’ve seen a lot of abuse in the church with spiritual fathers. But on the drive home that hot June night, I had a feeling. Dan is my spiritual father. But I knew he would never see it that way. Partially because he resists things that get misused in church and partially because he sees me as Rey, grandmaster Jedi of the Spirit. I told God that night if this is a thing, He’d have to reveal it to Dan. I wouldn’t go there in that relationship unless Dan brought it up to me.
Fast forward to August. A hurricane threatened the gulf coast and Kent felt in the spirit that they needed to evacuate. They came up and spent like four days with us. Kent led worship and preached and prophesied a couple nights. He spoke over most everyone else in the church. But his words to me came in the mornings when we were up before everyone else. And one at the table with Dan when he prophesied about my husband to come. (Which dan just loved. He’s always trying to marry me off. Lol). He talked about the places he saw me going and how the next few years are going to be really exciting for me because as I’m finishing my natural education I’m also being schooled in the spirit. It was pretty neat. I’ll never forget that last hug he gave me. How he told me he loved me.
A week ago, we got word that Kent was in the hospital with Covid. He was struggling to breathe and they wanted to put him on a vent. Most people never come off the vent. Neither did Kent. For days we cried and prayed and begged god for Kent’s life. But his race was finished. It was time for him to go. Yesterday we attended his funeral. It was hard. Dan’s been depressed all week. At the funeral Kent’s spiritual father spoke about how Kent had asked him to be his spiritual father and he said that Kent had it all inside him already he just needed a little guidance. I immediately thought of how that sounded like me and Dan. They sang worship songs at the end. They played good good father and I just lost it. I have a difficult relationship with that song as it is. I struggle to relate to god like that because of my own bad daddy experiences. After funeral, dan put his hand on my back and said “I’ve been neglecting my role but I’m your spiritual father “ and how god revealed to him to during the funeral that he’s been doing the work of a spiritual father without putting a name on it but it’s time to define this relationship for what it is. He also saw Kent Brown laughing his way into heaven and he got so filled with joy and peace.
I was almost mad at God when we found out Kent was sick. I couldn’t understand why God brings people into my life, let’s me fall in love with them, and then takes them away. But yesterday I saw the big picture. Kent came into my life to show Dan who we are together. That he’s the spiritual father I’ve always needed. And I’m the spiritual daughter that keeps him on his toes.